Give me love
by Carroline17
Summary: Working for a babysitting company in New York, 20-year-old Elena Gilbert is presented with an intriguing offer to work for a famous man who chooses to remain anonymous to her. When she accepts to work for him, how will this change Elena's life?
1. Chapter 1

_**Author's note: Hey guys! I know I haven't been really active with my writing on , but I guess it's just because Uni has kept me quite busy since the beginning of the academic year. Hopefully after exams end I'll be able to continue all of my stories during this long and hopefully free summer! This story is all about Elena and Damon (althought you'll be seeing a lot of Damon later, so please don't be upset for a few chapters until I bring everything into place). But, it takes place in the real world since I'm out of ideas about supernatural events that might happen to them anymore - TVD has made literally everything happen. So it's gonna be only Damon and Elena in the real world with other characters from Vampire Diaries popping in and out as well. A final note regarding this chapter - my next chapters will not be all like this, dialogues will be much more than present as soon as I get the action rolling. So bear with me until then! I guess that's all for my big intro, I hope you enjoy this chapter!  
**_

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Vampire Diaries. My story centres around the characters of the TV show that belong to their rightful owners (TV script by Kevin Williamson and Julie Plec) and of Vampire Diaries series written by L.J. Smith. I do not intend any infringement upon any music that might inspire chapter titles or parts of my story.**

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**CHAPTER 1 - PROLOGUE  
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I was sitting on a couch in the waiting room of an exquisite New Jersey babysitting company. Across the small coffee table, on the other side of the room, sat a freckled girl, not older than 16. She was probably waiting to see Mrs. Dobbs about another mind-blowing, fantastically well-paid summer job. After all, that's what they all wanted – sky-high salaries, few working hours and a nice, modern, wealthy family who would eventually hire them as their new nanny. I watched her as she was anxiously fidgeting in her chair, turning her head once in a while to stare at the maple-read door that would be opening every minute now.

Yes, she had it all – the decent look of a respectable young lady, the intoxicating wide commercial smile, a huge portfolio with references from probably over 30 families. And, last but not least, the talent to be whatever the client wanted – childish, bitchy or the calm, perfect nanny. This is the world I was a part of for 24 hours a day, seven days a week - a world which from the outside never seems more than a dull, horrific, bad-paid job.

Being a part of it, I must admit that it isn't as bad as it seems. At least not for someone like me. You see, I was just like that girl standing on the other side of the room – although I wasn't physically even close to the perfection she had been blessed with, in the inside I was the same when I started – alone, ambitious and with no other possibilities. It wasn't a career that most women chose by themselves. It was either because of financial need or because of no other options. I had had them both when I started a year and a half before.

I had been lucky, to say the least. Legally, I wasn't even an American citizen at that time, given the fact that I hadn't received my visa. I had had to drop out of university before even having the chance to begin my courses. I had only 350 dollars in my pocket at that time and no place to live in. I had to spend the whole summer of 2010 working as a maid in a wealthy Mexican's house in the daytime and as a waitress in a fancy bar at night.

After the life I was used to having at home, this experience was my own personal hell. I barely got through that summer alive. After being dumped on the streets by my tenant, I swore that I would fight more than ever. Of course, I could have been a thousand times better off than these miserable jobs, but who would have hired me on a time of economic crisis without a degree or proof that I was studying in order to have a better future?

A high-school diploma meant nothing at those times. Especially if you were a foreigner. I remember that I was one day sitting on a bench in the park, contemplating my life and wondering what I should do to get out of that mess. It was one of the rare occasions when I was actually talking to God and asking for his help – I was desperate. I guess that he heard me that day, because a few minutes later I bumped into a woman on the streets. Turns out that she wasn't just any kind of woman – she was wearing one of those Dolce & Gabbanna gorgeous white suits for working ladies, big black glasses and high-heels which I used to wear only at parties as a teenager. Her expression turned from anger due to my clumsiness (I had roughly bumped into her by mistake) to surprise as she was assessing my outfit and looked at me from head to toe. I never even had the chance to say how sorry I was, cause she silenced me with one quick hand movement. I have no idea what she saw in me that day and whether she read my mind or not, but she asked me if I needed a job.

That was Mrs. Dobbs back then – the successful English business woman, who owned a small private, but extremely successful babysitting company. I still look at her as my guardian angel, sent from above to save me. She offered me a room in their dorms, fed me and tested me to see if I was good enough for the job. It turned out that I was a perfect match with 'what the company was looking for'- the "perfect nanny".

When she offered me a place at her firm I just couldn't say no. It was just too good to be true. And so it started… From a childish, naive teenager, with no care I the world, I turned into a serious, respectable young lady, who no longer had the liberty of doing what she wanted. Compared to my former jobs, the salary was better, the conditions sometimes worse – after all, children are harder to work with than full-grown adults. At the beginning, you usually get different part-time jobs at families who only need your help once in a while. That is so that you get accustomed to all of the process.

The best thing about the job was that I spent most of the time with children, who I was truly crazy about. The worst part of the job was having to cope with the parents' high expectations and the children's mixed feelings towards me. But things got better after a while. Problems seemed to disappear, I was getting along with my regular clients and the paycheck was constant and finally satisfying my needs.

In this branch, when you get to the part where flawless recommendations from all your clients come pouring down, then you know it's time for a promotion. You might be obviously wondering what kind of a promotion could a babysitter even receive. I actually had the surprise of my life when I found out that I would no longer be working part-time for more households at a time. My boss had received a special request from a wealthy client who needed the services of a full-time nanny. It turned out that I was that nanny. I was completely stunned – girls usually waited even years in a row to get such an opportunity in our world. And here I was, no better than the others, already with such a big responsibility on the way. It took me a while to decide, but after thinking of my dorm room and modest lifestyle I decided to take the job and not look back. I wanted an apartment – a small and cheap one, but wanted something for my own personal use.

Bonnie, my only friend from the agency, was excited to hear about my promotion and supported me one hundred percent in my decision. At that time she was still having a hard time coping with working at six different families a week – a mouthful. My new family, the Lockwoods, were absolutely amazing – they were both working at important companies in town and were most of the time at work, which left me alone with their two children, Anna and Tyler, who were both in primary school. The situation went smoothly for about five months, when their father suddenly lost his job. That was when I realized that he was the one bringing the biggest amount of money home. However, his job loss didn't affect mine. In spite of my employers' efforts to find Mr. Lockwood a new job, the economic crisis offered nothing for the ones in need. So, Mr. Lockwood had to stay at home while his wife worked hard to sustain their family.

Mr. Lockwood seemed a very calm person to me, always good-willed and easy to please. However, the situation started driving him crazy and so he became more upset and angrier as the days passed. He never had a problem with me, but he started to radically change his behaviour towards his wife, without any sane explanation. In a while I could hear them arguing about their difficult situation on a daily basis. It was worse that they would always do it in front of the kids. The poor darlings, they would beg me to take them away from home when their parents ended up in the same room. It didn't help either that Mr. Lockwood was always more attentive with me than his wife, and soon enough I was starting to receive jealous looks from Mrs. Lockwood.

I tried to back away for a little while and I started avoiding my male boss so as not to cause a scene with his wife. Things were finally starting to cool down when I one day found my employer in the children's room, waiting for me to arrive from my apartment. He had deliberately taken the children to school earlier in order to catch me home alone. As I realized what was happening, my first instinct was to run. In a moment of complete craziness, I tried to be reasonable about the whole thing. I tried to convince myself that I was just being paranoid. After all, he was my calm, serious, nice boss.

So I stayed put next to the door, hoping that I was just having a midday headache. Bad move… Out of nowhere, he unexpectedly jumped from his seat and caught me in his arms faster than I could get out the door. It wasn't hard to understand what he wanted from me. I was truly appalled. He told me that I knew how crazy I was about him and that he had had the same feelings for me since I first set foot on his doorstep. I tried to explain, to reason with him, to tell him how wrong he really was, but it failed. Struggling wasn't helpful either since he was stronger than me, although I did try to remember the basic survival stuff in case you get attacked. Instead of fighting with me, he started caressing me and whispering all sorts of things in my ears. He had it all figured out – how we would keep our affair a secret and that he knew I was only lying to torture him and make him love me more.

And then, out of the blue, he tried to kiss me. God must have probably heard my prayers again that day, 'cause his wife barged in the room and caught us before he could say or do anything worse. But my relief was short-lived, given the compromising position in which she had caught us both – she seemed as if she could rip my head off, but, instead, she started fighting with her husband. That was my cue to leave. Besides the obvious fact that I was fired for 'flirting and luring her husband' Mrs. Lockwood made a huge scandal at the agency, where she demanded that I be thrown out in the streets where I belonged. Once again, my life seemed to fall into thousands of pieces. I could already see myself wandering on the streets with no future left after such a mess.

I was planning to quit in order to avoid the shame of seeing Mrs. Dobbs' disappointed look on her face. Fortunately, after telling her the entire story, my boss believed me instead of the neurotic Mrs. Lockwood, but only God knows why. She kept all of the scandal under the rugs, away from the media and dealt with Mrs. Lockwood's desire of getting back at me. Bonnie helped me as well to recover after that wretched event. She turned out to be a life-saver, spending all her free time in my apartment and taking care of me as much as she could. I acted all brave and tough in front of my boss and Bonnie, but I was a true wreck on the inside.

All of these events happened six months ago, in November 2011. Since then, I went back to the part-time jobs at my old families and to my excellent references. The situation went on this way until I received an urgent call from my boss telling me to come down to the office on this Monday morning. I didn't understand quite well what was so important, but it must have been a special request from a client. So here I was, waiting to see what would happen next. While I remembered my entire story, I didn't even realize that the young freckled girl had entered my boss's office. It wasn't until she came out with a huge arrogant smile on her face that I realized I had already lost the job, before even knowing what it was really about.

As I was beginning to sulk in, my attention was drawn from Mrs. Dobbs' assistant, Greta, who called my name, asking me to please enter the office. I slowly got out of my seat, surprised and disappointed that she wouldn't even give me a chance at this better, special job. But could I really hope to receive such a good job given my previous experience? Of course that Mrs. Dobbs would prefer somebody without such unfortunate records as mine, someone new, fresh off the market. As I was trying to convince myself of the obvious, I couldn't help but feel hurt as I passed my opponent.

How could I deny it? She had won…

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**_As much as I hate asking for reviews, I really need to know what you guys think, so I'll be waiting for your opinions :)_**


	2. Chapter 2 Unexpected

_**Author's note: Ok, guys, so I did a lot of writing last night after publishing the first chapter of my new story. I just went absolutely mental! So the result is here - Chapter 2 'Unexpected'. Also, I just watched the last episode from Season 3 , the Vampire Diaries. Wasn't that an absolutely EPIC finale? I think that Elena turning into a vampire is the best thing that the writers could've done for the show. They were just dragging it along and it was leading nowhere. Especially since now Elena will be remembering how she met Damon FIRST and how he said he loved her that night in Season 2 Episode 10... I really hope she'll be choosing him when Season 4 starts. I CAN'T WAIT and it's gonna be starting in September i.e. in 4 months..ughh! Oh, well, until then, I think I might've found some inspiration for my other story "Promise me forever" but I'll be taking care of that during the summer - definitely! I would like to thank the people who've been reading the first chapter of this story - thanks for reviewing, adding my story to your alert/ favorite stories lists, it means a lot to me. Hopefully I won't be disappointing you with this story! This chapter actually has dialogue so no worries - won't be as boring as the last one. So... enjoy!  
**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own the Vampire Diaries. My story centres around the characters of the TV show that belong to their rightful owners (TV script by Kevin Williamson and Julie Plec) and of Vampire Diaries series written by L.J. Smith. I do not intend any infringement upon any music that might inspire chapter titles or parts of my story.**_

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_****_**CHAPTER 2 - UNEXPECTED  
**

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Ms. Dobbs's office had remained the same since the first day I set my foot in it. A stranger could have sworn that he had taken a wrong turn and ended up in a shrink's office, for all I knew. You would always get that strange feeling because almost everything in the room was white – the walls, the furniture, even the curtains, which made it hard to realize where the walls ended and where the windows started. The only things that weren't white colored were the rugs, which were a strong red, and the occasional lilies and roses that Greta would place all over the room.

It was a strange ambient to work in, but that was just my non-expert opinion. My boss – a tall, good-looking 30-year old with short, spiky, light-brown hair - seemed to do just fine, given the huge stack of files placed on her desk, next to her fancy Mac Book (Yes, you guessed - it was a white Mac Book). That meant another fruitful season for the firm. The multi-colored files usually contained forms completed by the families in need of our services, information about the households, but could also contain special wishes, some stranger than the others. I remember taking care of some children whose parents had an obsession regarding cleaning. During those three months I must have cleaned myself and their entire house more than I had ever done in my entire life. After finishing my contract, it took me another month to go back to my normal self again. The job could sometimes be a mouthful - that I had to admit. I couldn't even imagine how could deal with such different personalities and such freakishly strange requests from our clients.

I went into her office without knocking, careful not to interrupt her in case she was on the phone or in an online conference. She hated being interrupted during work. I guess that's how she managed to get all of those titanic tasks done day after day. Fortunately, she was just going through some of her files, a scene which I was so accustomed to. She looked at me curiously from under her red-colored glasses and smiled. I took a seat on the chair opposite her desk, knowing how much she hated formalities and opening lines. She slowly took her glasses off, taking time to prepare herself for our conversation. She must have noticed the expression on my face, which had probably turned sulked and pathetic since the incident in the waiting room. There was no faking it in front of Rose Dobbs – not after so much time spent together. As if she could listen to my train of thoughts, my boss let her firm, but yet warm voice break the silence between us.

'Would you care to tell me what is it that has upset you, Elena?'

Her British accent would always make smile a bit whenever I would hear it. But today I wasn't in the mood to smile. Answering her question was going to be an impossible task, but I had to at least try to fake it.

'It's really nothing, Ms., I'm just a bit tired, that's all.'

'And disappointed, of course.'

I couldn't even look her straight in the eye, let alone deny the whole story. I felt like a coward not having the guts to tell her how unfair she had been. Instead of lying to her face about the whole thing or admitting it, I went silent, and kept my gaze down, locked on my feet.

'Silence is also an answer', she said. 'I just wish you didn't get so upset over such a childish thing as this.'

A childish thing as this? Was she for real? I couldn't believe my ears. This wasn't just a job, it was a one-way ticket to financial security and comfort, given the fact that the employers were a very important, rich family. Rumors had it that the employers were a family involved in the political scene of the country. But, strangely enough, I wasn't upset about the financial opportunity that the job would have given me. I tried to formulate an answer.

' It's not about the money that the job involves…'

' I already knew that. You see, Elena, you were never the kind of person who ran after something, just because it could guarantee you a big paycheck. Am I right when I say that you are disappointed in my decision?' I couldn't speak for a while, knowing that I was a tad upset, but when my lips opened, I was just saying the truth, my sad truth.

' Why would I be disappointed in you, Ms.? You simply felt that the other girl deserved the job more than I did, and I would be wrong to judge your decisions. After all, you have been working in this industry since forever. I just started a year and a half ago. What kind of experience could I possibly have to receive such an important job?'

' Now, here you are mistaken.' As my boss felt that she had caught my full attention, she carried on, alert as always. 'Do you honestly believe that I would choose anyone aside from you for an important job like this one? You saw the girl - she is 18, charming, more beautiful than she'll ever be, but not nearly as good as you, when it comes to work experience and professionalism.'

' Ms, I don't understand… You say I'm better than anyone around here, but yet, you chose her instead of me. You must understand why I would be so confused.'

'Sweet girl, I never said you didn't have a right to be confused. It's just that, the employer wanted someone who was completely different from you, in every way humanly possible. They didn't just want a nanny, they wanted a girl who would appear in newspapers and on TV next to the whole family, making them look respectable and honest. How could I possibly make you go through all of this, knowing how pure and sincere you really are? You can't lie or pretend, Elena. That was the reason why I couldn't choose you for the job. It would have been torture for you to have to take part in this theatre play all day long. You would have been in the spotlights, trapped in a world which I know wouldn't suit you at all. That's why I never even mentioned this job to you. I knew how you would have reacted. However, I see that you have found out anyway.'

At one point along my boss's speech I started blushing, ashamed of the way I had reacted. Could I possibly be more childish and naïve than this? My answer came out quieter than needed.

'Girls talk around here. Actually, I guess they talk a lot more than necessary. I'm sorry, I never even considered the problem from this view. I simply rushed into judging you, without actually thinking it through. I was upset and mad before I came in your office, but I now realize that I was a fool to think so. I don't know what got into me, I'm not like this…'

' My point exactly, Elena. It's not like you at all to rush into things. Nonetheless, I have my part of the blame for the situation that you are now in.'

My eyes turned to stare into hers as she continued sharing her thoughts.

' I mean, I couldn't have predicted what that awful Lockwood man was going to do or want with you - they were like all the normal, respectable families present in my bunch of files right over here. But I still regret the way I handled the situation. I should have never made you start all over again from scratch. It wasn't fair. To hell with the respectable Carol Lockwood and her hysteria! I shouldn't have done this to you, but I had to protect the name of the company, even if it meant hurting you. I hope you can understand that.'

' Ms Rose, you weren't to blame. If there was anyone to blame, then it's me –the person who didn't resign from the first suspicious sign of my employer's craziness. I wish I could turn back time, but there's nothing that I can do, and neither could you, Ms.. I am truly grateful for the way you handled things back then. You could have easily thrown me on the streets, without even looking back. Instead, you trusted me and put your faith in me. These months have actually helped me recover from all that mess. And for that, I am grateful to you.'

'Well… to be honest, you deserved it, honey. I don't think I ever received a complaint or a bad reference from any family where you worked at. And that truly is… something. You say these months have been good for you. How do you feel now about your current families?'

'Mhmm, they're great… I get a bit tired at times, given that I don't have a stable home, but I'm happy with things the way they are.'

'I see. And… what if I told you that I had a new job for you, Elena?'

At that moment, I felt my breathing stop for just a brief second. I tried hard to concentrate, in order to be sure that I hadn't just dreamed the last phrase.

'A job? For… me?'

Rose Dobbs simply smiled at my reaction and opened the blue file she had been looking upon earlier. Her expression quickly turned from warm and caring to professional and cold. I knew what came next.

'Precisely - a well-deserved job for you, my dear.' She paused, waiting for my reaction.

'What is it about?'

'The file that I'm now holding in my hands, Elena, is a very special request from an anonymous client. Well, anonymous to you - for the moment. The employer is a famous person, who needs someone he can trust with his children, as well as with their secrecy. That means that the job implies you being the sole of discretion, when it comes to this family. You couldn't tell anyone about this, not even Bonnie.'

Ouch, that stung…

'You mean that…'

' …it only concerns their names and identity. Probably until you gain their trust. They are in a difficult position at the moment and so they need a discrete, gentle and warm person to be their caretaker.'

My relief had been short-lived.

'When you say difficult position, do you mean their parents' popularity?'

'Not exactly, although that is one of the problems.' My boss's eyes tensed and her smile turned into a straight line. 'They suffered a recent loss. Their mother passed away six months ago and they're probably still in shock after such a tragedy.'

I caught my breath for the second time, but, instead of losing the capacity to speak, I carried on, apparently unaffected.

'I see… How many children are there?'

'This is the hard part. There are four of them.'

'Four? Oh my God… And how old are they?'

'Well, the oldest is in secondary school. One is in primary school, the other one last year of kidergarten and the smallest is two years old.'

I can't say that I had expected that. It was bad enough that their mother had died, but all of them to be so young… and without their mother... I could only imagine how bad the situation really was. As I was lost in my thoughts, Rose suddenly spoke.

'I can see from your expression that you find it a bit… overwhelming.' She looked at me with worried eyes.

'Overwhelming doesn't even begin to cover it. To be honest, I find it impossible. It's just that… I've never been confronted with something like this until now, not even close. And I sincerely don't understand why you chose me in spite of somebody more experienced.' She took a long pause, carefully preparing her following words.

'I know it's hard to understand, Elena. But you are the one that I see most fit to handle this situation. If you think about it a little harder, I think you'll realize why I'm doing this.'

And then there was suddenly light. In complete shock, I realized that she wanted me not only to take care of these kids, but to help them - to heal them… Of course that's what she wanted. That must have been one of the things the father was asking for. Having four kids was hard enough to deal with, but to have to raise them all alone, after your wife suddenly passed away, was truly tragic. I couldn't even imagine what was going on there. Life wasn't fair at all sometimes, but everybody gets a piece of that sooner or later. I just wished that those children had gotten their piece later.

'Is that what their father wants?' I asked.

'I don't understand…'

'Does their father want me to help them, to heal them?'

'See, that's one of the reasons I picked you instead of someone else. You're quick and bright. He doesn't clearly state the fact, but he mentions that he wants someone who can be their friend, like an older sister, not only an employee. I think that pretty much states the fact, although untold.'

'Well, I can understand why you would think that I am the right person for this job.'

'Mhmm, but tell me, Elena… do you find yourself appropriate for the job?'

It took me a while to answer that. I had to think it through, of course. And it seemed that I needed more time.

'With the risk of losing the job by saying this… I just need some time to think about this thoroughly. I'm sorry, , I can't give you an answer at the moment. I know how you hate it when I'm so undecided. I just think that this kind of situation requires more than ten minutes of thinking upon it. I'm sincerely sorry. Maybe if you could give me today or the latest - tomorrow.'

'Very well. I understand your point of view. And I am happy that you're not going to take a decision like this in a hurry. Tell you what… I'm going to make a copy of this file and I'll give it to you. There are no names, no personal details about the family, so even if you lost it, nothing could go wrong.'

She pushed a button on her phone and a few seconds later Greta was running in the office, hurrying to photocopy the file. After a few minutes I was already holding the piece of paper in my hands, anxious to start reading.

'You have until tomorrow, Elena. I trust you will take the right decision.'

I smiled at and got out of her silk-white fluffy chair. I was right in front of the door when I suddenly turned around to ask my boss something.

'One last thing… About the confidentiality clause – when does it exactly begin to function?'

'The minute you sign the contract and start working for them.'

That was really good news. I couldn't wait to leave as fast as possible. Before closing the door said in a calm, serene voice:

'Oh, and Elena… Say hello to Bonnie for me, will you?'

For a second there I could have sworn that I sensed an ounce of amusement in her tone.

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_**Ok, so this is chapter 2 - what do you guys think? It'll get more interesting as we go along but until then I need your reviews to see if I'm doing it right... Until next time!**_


	3. Chapter 3 Decisions

_**Author's note: Ok, so these have been a crazy couple of days. First of all, thank you for reviews and story subscriptions - I'm so happy that you guys are enjoying the story! Second of all, it's revision time at Uni. And I'm writing stories for fanfiction... Which will be extremely bad for my exam results probably. So, sadly, this will be the last chapter in this story for another month... I'm really sorry about that. I;m gonna have to focus on Uni if I wanna pass and get good grades. But don't worry, I will come back and finish the story. So this is chapter 3 of the story - 'Decisions'. Hope you guys enjoy it! **_

_******Disclaimer: I do not own the Vampire Diaries. My story centres around the characters of the TV show that belong to their rightful owners (TV script by Kevin Williamson and Julie Plec) and of Vampire Diaries series written by L.J. Smith. I do not intend any infringement upon any music that might inspire chapter titles or parts of my story.**_

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**CHAPTER 3 - DECISIONS**

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Bonnie Jamie Peterson was a 23-year-old red-haired Texas girl who had come to New Jersey in search for a job one year before my arrival. She came from a modest family with severe problems when it came to alcohol. She had finished one of the most prestigious high-schools in Austin thanks to a well-deserved scholarship and some help from one of her teachers. However, because of her parents' vices and violence she had left home at the fragile age of 18 with nothing more than a backpack and an inspiring talent for art.

When she first told me her story she had not lingered on the part when she had first come here, but her first months in New Jersey weren't far different from my unfortunate experience. In the beginning, Bonnie had tried to sell her paintings. When she didn't succeed in doing that, she tried to get a job as an art teacher or at a museum. She eventuBonnie failed to trick the system, which absolutely required a college degree so as to get a stable, decent-paid job. Instead, she did the only other thing that she was an ace at – childcare. And so Bonnie arrived at Mrs. Dobbs' doorstep, eager to earn her first payment, but not so in love with the job itself.

You could say that Bonnie was way better than me when it came to experience. Compared to me, an only child, she had five younger siblings, whom she took care of while living in her parents' house – a wasted and painful childhood, indeed. However, that was one of the things that we always joked about – she had the experience and I had the love for the job. Together, we were invincible. It was a pity that we couldn't actuBonnie work as a team. In our world, the job was for a one-man team.

However, Bonnie had never reBonnie forgotten about her first love – painting. She still used to paint in her free time and draw sketches wherever she was – on the subway, in my apartment or at work. Bonnie was always discrete about it though. It was more than a hobby and that could be seen by everyone. But it had to remain just "a hobby" in other people's eyes for the sake of her job. I hated how she always had a pained expression on her face whenever I would catch her staring at her unfinished work. If only I could one day help her fulfill her dream. Bonnie had had a far worse life than mine and she deserved better than that. But then again, on some level, we - the girls working for Ms. Dobbs -all deserved better than this.

When I arrived on 41 Maple Street I had already done all the homework concerning my possibly new family while on the subway. I was so eager to start talking to Bonnie about everything, hoping that I would somehow find an answer to my dilemma. As soon as sweet, old Mr. Jakowitz, the guard, let me inside the building, I started running like crazy three stores up the stairs, feeling a bit like Tom Cruise in Mission Impossible. Of course that, once the staircase was conquered, my lungs were out of air so I started breathing unevenly. Somewhere along the way I had also lost my rubber band and I suppose that my hair looked far worse than usual.

These were probably the reasons why Bonnie seemed to be completely shocked the moment she opened her apartment door and saw me hurrying like hell had just frozen. I had almost forgotten to mention that my face usuBonnie turned an intense red after I ran. Bonnie, who was usuBonnie the most volcanic person in the world, was now reduced to silence. After assessing my looks, she spoke first.

'Good God, I knew that your dream was to compete in a world-class marathon, but I hardly think it's the right time to start training for it, Elena. What _happened_ to you?'

'I know it's hard to understand,' I sheepishly started, 'but I promise you that it's not as bad as it seems.'

'I do hope it isn't. Otherwise you would be in need of a serious intervention.'

'May I come in?'

'Not unless you brought a good piece of gossip from the boss's office.' Bonnie said giggling.

'ActuBonnie, I come bearing gifts as well - marshmallows.' It was our favorite dessert in the whole wide world.

As Bonnie's face suddenly started to glow, I knew that it was my cue to come in and start talking. I put the already-cooked marshmallows in a multi-colored bowl and placed it on the floor, next to our favorite seats in the world- two Turkish pillows, ordered from New York City especiBonnie for Bonnie on her birthday last year. They kind of completed the room, given their strange asymmetrical display of colors and geometrical figures. I sometimes felt that they were a part of Bonnie herself.

While my host was preparing a round of our favorite lemonade, I had the chance to take a look at her latest works. She had been working on a new masterpiece – a portrait of a little boy playing with his pup in Central Park. It looked more like a picture made in Photoshop than a painting drawn by a young woman. And well, Bonnie did have a strange vision of the world, depending on how one would feel about the dog's blue fur. My best friend had taste, I had to admit that. Unfortunately, other people were a little bit reserved when it came to her extravaganza. Buyers usuBonnie preferred normal, dull paintings that would reflect life the way we knew it.

'Bonn'?'

'Yeah, Lena pumpkin?'

I was on the verge of violently bursting into laughter. I hadn't heard my favorite nickname in days and that sent a warm fuzzy feeling inside of me. God, I had missed Bonnie so much, I sometimes couldn't believe how long we could resist staying far away from each other. Well, Bonnie did have an alibi. His name was George, he was 25 years old and worked as a lawyer for a famous international company. He was my best friend's boyfriend and the most important thing in her life apart from me.

'How are things going on with George?'

'Well, you know what my busy George is like – he's on another boring business trip these days. He left yesterday for gloomy Seattle, I think he's meeting up with a high-class snob from the company in Washington. He's not staying long this time, though, he promised he would be here this weekend with me.'

'This weekend? Oh my God… it's your anniversary, isn't it, Bonnie?'

'Yup, it actuBonnie is. You remembered!' she turned around with her big brown eyes staring me intently.

'Bonnie Jamie Peterson, how could I forget? Don't you remember who helped you guys meet?'

'Well, if I recall it right, I think that it was a dreamy 22-year-old girl, who, at that time, was anti-social and wanted to have nothing to do with guys… Did I get it right, babe?'

That was one of the episodes in my life that I would always try to forget about. Two years before I was working at a sweet family living in the suburbs of New Jersey. I was at their little daughter's birthday party, when this incredibly elegant and cute guy walked through the door with a giant teddy bear for the birthday girl. In an awkward way, we sort of had an instant connection the moment I spilled a huge glass of kids champagne on his sweater. Needless to say, I felt incredibly stupid. So, in my pursuit to make amends, I offered to set the guy up with a friend of mine, instead of accepting his invitation to have dinner sometime. At that time I was an anti-social, like Bonnie had said. It turned out that mystery George was Bonnie's soul mate after all. Since that day, they've been inseparable.

'Yeah, honey, I think you got it just right. I hope you two have fun this weekend.'

'Thanks, we both need it, that's for sure. But enough about us, you hear this stuff _all_ the time… Tell me all about your meeting with the dragon Lady.'

I couldn't help but laugh at the sound of Bonnie's newly found nickname for Ms. Dobbs. I think I talked for a good uninterrupted 15 minutes, time in which I filled Bonnie in with every single detail that Rose Dobbs had given me. At the end of my monologue, Bonnie seemed both happy and sad.

'Wow… I guess that she really did mess with your head this time. Big time.'

'What? No, Bonnie, no way… Rose didn't mess with my head, she just thought that I was the best person for the job.'

'Hmmm, let us see, shall we? The papers say "In need of a sweet, patient, caring person to look after all four children…". And is Elena Victoria Gilbert– 1. Sweet? Sweet as a cup of sugar – check! 2. Patient? Annoyingly patient, I might add – check! 3. Caring? You'd give your life for a kid – so…check! 4. Four children? A mouthful; capacity to handle a mouthful? Pretty good – check!

'That's not the problem…'I replied half amused half serious.

'You're practically Wonder Woman for the job! I think you'll be just fine…'

'Bonnie Jamie Peterson!' At my sudden outburst I did really manage to make Bonnie shut up. She slowly turned to look at me with a surprised expression on her face.

'Oh my God… you called me by my full name.' It took me a few seconds to answer.

'I know I did… I didn't mean to.'

'You really are upset, aren't you?'

'Not upset.' At this point, Bonnie was standing in front of me, holding my hand. 'I'm just a bit overwhelmed by the situation and I just couldn't stand you babbling about how perfect I am for the job…'

'…which you are…'

'… when I am just worried that…'

'…you'll screw it up…'

It was my turn to be surprised. Bonnie was protectively caressing my hair when she started.

'Why do you look so surprised? I sometimes think that you don't give me enough credit…'

'It's not that, Bonnie. I know that you always listen to what I say. You're a very good friend. My best friend… my only friend, actually.'

'Well, I'm glad to hear that. Not about the fact that I'm your only friend, which is wrong, but that you consider me your fantastic BFF.' My giggle didn't interrupt Bonnie though – she was on a roll. 'Look, although it sometimes seems that I don' get it, I do, Elena. And I understand what you must be going through. I bet it's hard – especially for you. I mean, it really does sound that these kids are messed up. Not that they are supposed to be druggies or spoiled or snob rich kids, but they've had and still have a big problem. And I bet it'll be almost impossible to help them recover, but you do have experience with troubled kids.'

'Bonnie, a one-year course in psychology and a few months of practice in a doctor's office hardly makes me appropriate for this job. I wonder why their father doesn't take them to see a specialist, if he needs help with them.'

'Elena, honey, where did you get that idea from?'

'Didn't you see the description? Their father doesn't want me to 'take care of them' - he wants me to _look after_ them. There's a difference. It's like he's asking for someone to help them stay out of trouble or to help them forget about the trouble they're in.'

'And you don't think that you're up for that…'

'The thing is, Bonnie, I understand what it's like – I bet that they don't even want anything else but to be alone, with their dad. And instead of taking care of them himself, this man sends out for a nanny? As if a nanny could take care of such a problem...'

'A-ha. I get where you're coming from. But the thing is, Elena, maybe he's head over heels with this whole situation. After all, he has four kids… Fooour! That's a lot – that's how many brothers and sisters I had to look after when I wasn't more than a kid myself. It isn't easy – it's actually hard as hell. And I was lucky enough to be a woman and to have some kind of a maternal instinct – just think about how complicated it is for a man to take care of so many kids. But I'm sure you'll eventually get the hang of it. I mean, just think about it – this might be your destiny. Nobody else from the firm is better than you for the job. Take me for instance. Although I'm ok with the job, I don't have enough patience with children, that's why I prefer taking care of babies - at least they can't talk, they just cry. Janet is the best when it comes to teenagers because she's still a teenager and Jennifer has the talent to make children laugh. And the other girls are temporary workers only. But let's be honest now. These kids don't need a clown to make them laugh or an older sister, they need someone who's like a mother. And you're mother-material.'

'Oh, stop it… Now you're just fooling around.' I replied bewildered and a bit freaked out about what she had just said.

'Of course I am, you're more of a kid than I am.'

'Bonnie, I'm just afraid that I'm going to fail. I mean, let's say that I do get along with them, that I help them get better and that I become their best-friend. That would be perfect. But nothing really is perfect. If it were another family with another situation I wouldn't be so scared. But I just don't want to mess them up more than they already are.'

'Then don't!'

'Wait…what?'

'Then don't mess them up – heal them, Elena. Go give it a shot, try as hard as hell to help the poor kids and make them better, happier, stronger. I know it's gonna be hard, but everything has a price. And after all, it's your chance to help somebody – and you know what you taught me about helping other people…'

'Yeah – if you can help somebody, then it's a mistake to turn your back on them. I guess I see your point.' _How had she managed to catch me like this?_

'After all, you can't do more damage than what's already there, can you?'

'I suppose you're right.' This idea was growing in my head and it suddenly started to seem possible.

'Don't be a coward, my fabulous Elena! Take this chance, I know you want it – I can see it in your glowing eyes – you want it more than you want others to see it.'

Listening to Bonnie, I realized that she was right. What was present in my heart and pumping in my entire body wasn't fear or doubt, it was pure and utter desire – desire mixed with adrenaline. I thought this opportunity was more than a challenge – it was the big break that I was looking for. If I would get this right, then I could finally have the courage to pursuit my own dream of becoming a psychologist. However, there would be fear, doubt, insecurity – they would all eventually invade my soul and mind. But they weren't going to take over me right now – I was beginning to feel confident, strong and, strangely enough, optimistic. I wanted to cry, for the feeling in my heart was starting to grow bigger and bigger.

'I do see it in your eyes… God, I can't believe how much you must love the little brats in general. See, that's the difference between you and me – you adore not only the job, but the children as well. I adore the paycheck, but the kids – that's where my love stops.'

'Bonnie, you can sometimes be so crazy…'

'But that's part of my charm, isn't it?'

'Oh, it definitely is.'

'Hey, Elena… You know that I'll support you, no matter what decision you make, right?'

'Yeah, Bonnie – I know you will.'

'Just follow your heart, like you usually do – it seems to have driven you in the right direction so far.'

'I suppose it has. Thank you so much, Bonnie!'

'You're welcome – always and forever.'

A big, warm hug was our favorite way to call it a night – or, in this case – a midday meeting. After leaving Bonnie's apartment with a bag full of marshmallows stuck up my throat I slowly made my way through the busy city centre of New Jersey and found myself wandering the streets whilst gazing in the beautiful window shops. Without even planning my route, I ended up in my favorite part of Central Park – the children's playground. I sat on a bench, near enough so that I could see the kids playing, but farther away than usual.

In front of me there was another line of benches, all regularly arranged so as to face the playground. Every one of them was occupied by young ladies, aged between 15 and 30, that were either waiting for their child to finish playing or were already feeding them. They were all nannies. By now I could already tell because of their behaviour towards the kids. Mothers were usually so attached to their little ones that they would constantly go back and forth between the playground and their bench. However, nannies were usually more serene and relaxed, letting the children take care of themselves more than maternal love allowed.

I spent an hour that day in the park watching nannies and mothers come and go. There was one particular woman that caught my attention. Her little daughter fell a few steps away from the bench and instantly started crying. She hadn't hit her foot that bad, but, as toddlers usually do, she was screaming her lungs out, causing her mother to have a panic attack. Curiously enough, it was at that particular moment when I instantly realized why she would calm down quickly. Her mother would come running after her and would gently pick her up from the pavement. After giving her daughter water and taking care of the wound, the child would eventually become silent.

A memory from my own childhood suddenly flashed before my eyes and there I was – in front of my mother in the park. I had a huge bump on my forehead and my tears wouldn't stop falling. It was when two loving arms gently picked me up from the pavement that I started calming myself down. It took a few more minutes until my screaming finally became a silent sob. I don't remember much from that day, but I do recall my mother's warm hands on my cheeks, hair and arms, whilst she was hugging and caressing me to take away the pain. That's when I realized how lucky I had been to be blessed with having a mother to take care of me.

And that's when I realized that those poor children weren't going to have their mother take care of them anymore – they would be all alone, deprived of their mother's affection and kindness. It wasn't fair – reality and life altogether was not treating them right. Before I knew it, I was suddenly making my decision.

Before I could change my mind, I quickly took my mobile phone out of my purse and dialed the number I had memorized since I used it so often. After three repeated calls, the voice at the other end of the line suddenly came to life in a violent response.

'In God's name, girl, couldn't you have waited a tad longer? I was in a meeting.'

'Please excuse me, Ms. Rose, it wasn't my intention to disturb you.' At hearing my reply my boss's tone of voice suddenly turned into an interested one.

'Very well. So, tell me, Elena, what is it so urgent that you had to talk to me about it at this very moment?'

'I've made up my mind, Ms. Dobbs. I'm taking the job.'

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_**I've put some work in this chapter so I'd really appreciate it a lot if you could review it! Is the story interesting enough so far? Also, next chapter is probably gonna be the one where Damon comes into the picture... So get ready :) Until next time!**_


	4. Chapter 4 A new beginning

_**Author's note: Ok, I couldn't resist and started writing again. Hope you like this chapter! Enjoy!**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own the Vampire Diaries. My story centres around the characters of the TV show that belong to their rightful owners (TV script by Kevin Williamson and Julie Plec) and of Vampire Diaries series written by L.J. Smith. I do not intend any infringement upon any music that might inspire chapter titles or parts of my story.**_

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**CHAPTER 4 - A NEW BEGINNING**

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It was a particularly silent evening on Wuthington Street. There was no star in the cloud-covered sky and the thermometers showed a mere 5 degrees – an unusually cold night for May 6th –the coldest in the past decade according to the weather channel. The streets were however full of people, happy to get out of their houses and away from work – for it was a Friday evening, the official beginning of the most-desired weekend. From the window of my second storey apartment I could easily see groups of delighted children running after each other on the street. The teenagers were taking photos of themselves sitting on the benches in the park and secretly drinking Coke mixed with Vodca, while the elder were enjoying the evening with plastic mugs of hot cocoa from the nearby Starbucks coffee shop.

On an ordinary Friday evening, I would have been one of those people standing in the cold outside – drinking hot chocolate, going out for my evening jog or simply taking a stroll in the park at sunset. I would have probably been freezing, for I hated the cold, but I wouldn't have wasted a night like this. That is, if the situation had been different.

Three days had passed since May 1st when I had signed the contract to work for my new family. Their name still remained a classified secret, even to me, the newly employed nanny. But I had learned the meaning of patience - it wasn't as if a family name was that important anyway. Bonnie, however, seriously disagreed with me on this particular aspect. She had called Ms Rose a 'twisted mind-controlling freak' for not giving me more details regarding the family. But that was not the main reason why my dear Bonnie was so upset with our boss.

'I still can't believe that the little English snob didn't tell you that you had to move in with these guys from the beginning.'

'Correction, Bonnie, she actually did.' I said trying to calm her down.

'Yeah, she definitely did' _Oh, how I knew that sarcastic tone of hers!_ '- ten minutes _after_ you signed the contract.'

'Well, I did sign next to the clause '…any additional conditions must be fulfilled'. I didn't really have a choice.'

'Oh, pleeeaaase…You can try defending her as much as you want. 'Cruela' just wanted to have her hooks even tighter around you.' She said whilst trying to fit some books of mine in one of the suitcases.

'Jamie…' I said with my shut-up-Bonnie-or-I'll-get-really-upset-because-of-you tone.

Whenever I called my best friend 'Jamie' that way to her face she would either freak out about it or obediently shut up. In the beginning I couldn't quite get why she would get so upset about it – I mean, that was only her real, not only her second, name, after all. In time, however, I learned that she hated her real name because of the way her alcoholic parents would always pronounce it before they beat her. She actually changed her name after leaving home but, strangely enough, still kept the name her parents gave her though only as a second name.

In fact, the reason why Bonnie disapproved so much of our boss was because 'Jamie' was the name that our Ms Dobbs always called her, although Bonnie had told her not to. I sometimes saw what Bonnie really meant when she accused Rose of treating her from an upper level. George, however, never used my best friend's real name against her, no matter how bad their fight was, but I would do it now and then, just to calm her down when she started getting upset over something. The method always worked, but I kept using it lesser, as I grew fonder of her. As always, Bonnie simply changed the subject.

'Lena, wasn't there any other day in which you could move all of your stuff? I mean, packing all of these things will take us more than after midnight.'

Oh, yes! I had completely forgotten about all the packing that had to be done that evening. When I had signed the contract, it was clearly stated that I had to move in with the family in less than a week's time. At first, I thought that my boss was honestly joking. Not that she would ever joke about something serious like this particular matter, but still – it was a short period of time. After having my first panic attack, I quickly called Bonnie in need of serious advice. So she took a week off from work and helped me during the entire process – buying new things, planning a pick-up truck to come on Saturday morning, finding new tenants for my apartment, and, last but not least, packing. Somehow, the first three things on our list took us more time than we had expected. And, of course, the whole crying and wobbling over the fact that I was moving out of town, far away from Bonnie, kept us busy for almost the entire day on Monday.

Indeed, I forgot to mention that I actually was moving far away from Bonnie. And when I say far away I mean on the Western coast of the United States in a small village located an hour away from busy L.A. . Needless to say, when I found out (after signing the contract) I had more than a huge shock. I never even thought that this man could be contacting a babysitting company from the other side of the country to get a nanny. But sure enough, he probably wanted to remain anonymous and protect himself and his children as much as possible. Something which already made me respect him although I hadn't met him yet.

However, I can't say that Bonnie shared the same opinion since she had clearly stated how much she hated this man for taking me away for her. But after talking to her a lot about the whole thing, she understood that it was the best thing to do. I couldn't turn back anyway; but I didn't want to either. Somewhere inside me there was this strange voice telling me that it was the right thing to do.

So here we were, on a freezing Friday evening, desperately trying to put all of my things into bags and labeling the all-size multi-colored boxes, which were lying on the floor in an organized mess. I couldn't take most of my things with me, and after crying over the spilt milk, I managed to decide that the best solution was to leave them at Bonnie's place. It seemed that we were both starting to get tired of work, for we were starting to chit chat – very counterproductive for our work.

'I know that it was a little out of notice. But my new mystery boss wanted me to start as soon as possible' I enthusiastically said, but quickly heard how fake it really sounded. Luckily, Bonnie didn't pay attention to my tone. She was too busy to day dream like she often did.

'Figures… I wander what he looks like' Bonnie said with a dreamy smile on her face. Of course she had to say that!

'Is that all you ever think about?' I seriously asked, but felt my lips curving into a smile. 'Be careful, 'cause George will soon be in for some serious competition.'

'Neah, I stick with my man- always. Besides, I'll leave the hot employer to you, missy. You could need a young, sexy piece of…'

' …nothing. Stop it, or you might actually make me think like that about my new boss.' I already felt my cheeks going red.

'And that would be wrong, because…?' Moments like this made me remember just how crazy Bonnie could be.

'I don't even know how to answer that.' I answered sternly whilst shaking my head. 'Firstly, he's a suffering widower…'

'.. which can _easily_ be taken care of…' she said seductively. I chose to ignore her.

'…and, secondly, he's probably way past forty. I mean, he does have four kids, the oldest in secondary school…And the last thing I need is to be attracted to someone who could be my father.'

'True, but you forget the most important thing.' She said, not being able to contain her smile.

'And I'm afraid to ask what that would be.' I could feel my eyebrows go up in growing frustration.

'Well, he _is_ famous… I mean, aren't you even a tad curious who he could be?'

To be honest, I hadn't given much thought to that aspect. Since I had heard of their situation, the children were the only image present in my mind - for they were the object of my entire attention. But their father had never really invaded my thoughts … Well, until my twisted B.F.F. had mentioned it.'

'Maybe a bit. I mean, I never heard of a client so important that he actually asked for total discretion regarding the whole matter. Even about where he lives…'

'And don't forget that he never even wanted you to know that you were moving in with them before you signed the contract.' There was a weird idea starting to form in my head.

'Not to mention that I don't even know what their exact address is. I just know that I'm moving to a place next to L.A.' I said whilst pondering about the whole mystery.

'And let's not forget how he wants you to become his little **minion**' recited Bonnie with a strong emphasis on the last words. I played her game, however, for she was starting to be funny.

'Hmm… well, I guess I'm screwed.' I was only half joking. And it suddenly dawned on me. What if I was making a mistake by leaving behind everything I had here and moving with people whose names I didn't even know, let alone whose exact address I had no idea about. For all I knew this guy could be a freak – a freak worse than Mr God-damned Lockood was. That thought made me fell nauseous.

_Wait… Stop it right there, Elena! Don't you dare find reasons not to do this_ thinking that everybody is the same. You know that's not the right thing to do. And I did know; I think that I was scared a bit (ok, a lot) about this whole thing. And it had just hit me straight in the face. But then a sudden peace took place of the overwhelming anxiety. I stopped and thought about everything.

Did I even have such a good life to give away? In the end, I didn't have a boyfriend here, or any of my family members or any other friend apart from Bonnie. A small apartment and a part-time babysitter job didn't really qualify as being a life I had wanted for myself. Part of me was doing this because I knew there was more than this for me. My father always used to tell me to live my life like there was no tomorrow: "Carpe Diem". And so I would… My day-dream had lasted for only a few seconds just in time for me to come back to reality where Bonnie was replying.

'Neah, you'll be just fine. But if it's the president you're working for, please tell Mr. Obama I said 'hi'.'

'That's not possible. The president only has two kids. And he doesn't live in California.'

'Oh, well. Too bad then…'

After our little chit-chat and many other rounds of laughter we actually started working hard. But it wasn't until Bonnie snatched the bottle of Italian wine, which had been staying on the bookcase for over an year that we suddenly became over-productive. We practically turned into hard-working bees. Next thing we knew it, the clock struck eleven and we were almost finished.

'Hey, Elena, what do you want me to do with this old thing?'

'What …old… thing…?' I asked, interrupted by sudden hiccups.

As I saw the white teddy-bear that Bonnie was gently holding in her left hand (for her right hand was busy hosting another glass of wine) my eyes suddenly felt weepy. The teddy-bear had been a symbol of our undying friendship. It was almost two years old, like our relationship, and it grew older and older, as our bond became stronger and stronger. It was a childish thing, but I couldn't believe that we wouldn't be able to see each other whenever we wanted, to help one another whenever we needed and to hug whenever we felt like doing it. Two straight years and then, boom! This was our first obstacle and I perceived it as a turning point. She felt so as well. We could read it in each other's eyes. The next thing I knew, we were already cuddled up on the couch with my head resting on Bonnie's lap.

'Can you imagine what it would have been like if we hadn't met? I asked.'

'I suppose I could, if I tried, but I don't even want to think about it' Bonnie answered in a gloomy voice. 'I mean, who else could possibly be friends with such a depressive, mood-swinging maniac?'

'Ok, normally I would take that as an insult, but I think I'm too drunk to care.'

'I was talking about me, Elena…'

'Oh…' I said not realizing how sleepy I really was.

'Wait… Are you drunk? Well, that's a first…' Indeed, she was right. She had never seen me drunk until now; and this wasn't really my drunken state. I had had worse before.

'And you finally admit that you're a 'depressive, mood-swinging maniac'? Definitely a first…'

Our laughter broke before either of us could contain it. This moment right here felt good, something that we both knew wouldn't happen so often anymore.

'Elena, what happens if we'll drift apart …?' I was thinking about that too. But I didn't want to accept it at all.

'Bonnie Jamie Peterson! Don't even say it! I'll visit as often as possible. There's no way in hell that I'll be leaving you here all alone. Well, you won't actually be all alone – you have George, honey.'

'A boyfriend is not the same thing as a best friend' said Bonnie and afterwards pouted in disapproval.

'It'll be fine, we'll figure it out somehow.' I wondered if that was the first lie.

'Just promise me something, will you?'

'Anything - just name it pumpkin.' Now I was certain that I was drunk, for I had never said that phrase in my life.

'No matter how rich, kind or fantastic this new family will be, don't get so absorbed with your new life that you'll forget about your old one.'

'Bonnie, I could never do that.' Well, at least I really hoped that I wouldn't.

'I know, but… I'm just saying. I wouldn't want us to end up being strangers.'

'That will never happen. 'Friends for ever', remember?'

Bonnie's lips curved upwards just a bit when she saw me raise my fist in front of my face. At the sight of our secret handshake position, her eyes broke and tears started running down her cheeks while we performed our favorite figure, which we had once decided was the symbol of our eternal friendship. I obviously knew that 'never' was an impossibly long period of time and almost regretted using it. But, somehow, that night, two hearts were beating in the same rhythm, joined by the sincere love of two crazy, neurotic, caring friends.

The next morning we woke up with the worst headaches of our lives. In translation the worst hangover of our lives. When the alarm clock went off I felt like I hadn't slept a minute during the night. In earnest, I hadn't. I had had so many dreams that I couldn't keep count of how many times I woke up and then went back to sleep. It must have been the anxiety that was taking its toll on me.

After triple-checking everything in my bags and purse and hugging Bonnie five million times we took my bags out of my-soon-to-be ex apartment. Before leaving and closing the front door I took a last look at the empty rooms that now looked so gloomy and sad. The saying 'Home is where the heart is.' came into my mind. I instinctively wrapped my hand around my beloved necklace and took a deep breath. In earnest, my heart wasn't really anywhere – it was lost. And I was still looking for a place where I could feel just like myself again. I sincerely hoped that my new home would in time become my heart's home as well.

With that thought I quickly closed the door to my apartment. I went down the stairs as fast as I could never looking behind and saying goodbye to this life forever.

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_**I apologize for not bringing Damon into the picture yet. However, I'm planning a legendary entrance for him so please be patient (and don't hate me too much) :). So, what do you guys think about Chapter 4?  
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	5. Chapter 5 My new home

_**Author's note: Hello to all of my readers! I would like to thank you all for being patient. I promised I would continue with this story and I shall try very hard to keep the action pouring constatnly in Give me love. Exams are finally over so I can concentrate a bit on my holiday including my story. So thank you so much for the wait, I really hope that you guys will enjoy this chapter! I'm really excited about Give me love because I have some good ideas about what will happen next and I cannot wait to see your reactions and opinions to my story and style of writing! I apologise for the boring titles but I don't really find them that important as in my previous story Promise me forever. Hopefully the actual action will appeal to you all! Can't wait to see what you guys think of chapter 5!  
**_

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**CHAPTER 5 – MY NEW HOME**

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The flight from JFK to Los Angeles airport took exactly six hours. Before the day of my departure I had planned to sleep on the plane as much as I could knowing that after we landed I would have one of the most challenging experiences of my life – meeting my new family. I had also planned to look as respectable as possible which is why I had picked one of my best-looking clothes; nothing too formal – a knee-length blue skirt, a short-sleeved white top and no heels since I didn't really enjoy them at all. The plane was scheduled to arrive at exactly 3 pm in L.A. where my boss's driver would be waiting to pick me up and drive me to their house. The plan sounded easy but somehow I felt like I was living a detective story. Overall though, everything seemed as if it would work out smoothly.

Except that it didn't. And when I say it didn't, I mean the trip to L.A. was a complete and utter disaster…

…starting with the moment I left my apartment. Bonnie had called a cab to come and take us to JFK airport where we would be saying our final goodbyes. When the taxi driver was placing my suitcases in the car Bonnie got a call from the transport company that was supposed to come later and move all of my things to her apartment. Out of blue, the guy said that they would be arriving in 10 minutes to my place although Bonnie had clearly told them to come three hours later. Needless to say, she got very pissed off but couldn't do anything about it so we said our goodbyes in a rush and I had to go to the airport on my own – sulky and with a big pout on my face.

The trip to the airport turned out to be unnerving because of the two traffic jams that almost made me miss my flight. Luckily, I arrived at the gate right as the women were about to close the door. Since I had been running all the way from security check-in to the gate I was all sweaty and could hardly breathe. I don't even want to get started on how badly my feet could hurt at that moment – good thing I wasn't wearing heels that day. I thanked God I didn't miss the flight though – that would've been a catastrophe.

After that, everything seemed to go on smoothly. That is, until we had to take off. Now, in a sane, normal world, flights aren't supposed to be as difficult as mine just was – they're supposed to leave on time and arrive on time with no major problems in between. That didn't happen today. Just as I was relaxing and preparing for take-off a rushed announcement from the co-captain made its way to us passengers.

"Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen. Unfortunately, due to unforeseen health issues, my fellow captain will not be able to pilot this plane today. We have just announced the control tower and they haven't allowed us to take-off in these conditions. I am sorry to inform you that we shall have to wait until another pilot is assigned to this flight. This shouldn't take more than one hour time. We apologize for any inconvenience caused."

Finding another pilot took a good two hours but at least we took off safely. After that I finally calmed down and dove into a long sleep for about an hour until the flight attendant asked me if I wanted to drink something. I sleepily nodded and asked for a glass of apple juice (my favorite drink in the world apart from Coke). Believe it or not, just as the stewardess was handing me the juice, the plane suddenly experienced a brief but powerful turbulence and without anybody's fault really, the apple juice landed directly on my immaculately white shirt. Needless to say that I received hundreds of apologies from the flight attendant but I didn't hold it against her despite my growing anger – she wasn't to blame. Sleep didn't really come back to me after that incident in spite of my endless attempts.

So, in the end, I arrived in Los Angeles two hours later than scheduled, tired as never before and with a shirt that looked like a child had painted on it. Well, that was it with my decent look… At least I had enough luck to receive both of my suitcases in one piece. So far, that was the biggest achievement of the day. As I stepped out with my luggage in the arrival zone I could clearly see a middle-aged man with a paper in his hand on which it said "Elena Gilbert". I exhaled heavily as I slowly but confidently approached him.

As I was getting closer to him I could see his warm brown eyes looking at me as if he knew who I was. He was wearing a white long-sleeved shirt and black trousers and had a coat in his hand. That detail caught my attention as the temperature was extremely hot for May, 30 degrees. _Poor man_ I thought. Despite seeming bored from the extra two-hour waiting he had to do, he never appeared angry. His expression was serious though and he looked as if he was on the most important of missions. That fact made me cringe a bit as I didn't know what to expect of him whatsoever. When I finally reached him the man's smile grew even bigger and he rushed to greet me quite politely but also affectionately.

"Miss Gilbert, I presume?" he had a low but friendly voice as he stretched out his hand and gently shook mine. That gave me the confidence I needed as I cheerfully replied to him.

"Yes, you are right. I am Elena. It's so nice to meet you, Mr…"

"Oh, no, you don't need to use any of those big names with me, Miss. After all, I am merely Mr. Salvatore's servant." _Mr. Salvatore? That must be my boss…_ I thought "You can simply call me Elijah. Is that alright with you Miss?" His affectionate voice and respectfulness caught me off guard and I decided formalities weren't really necessary in his case.

"On one condition, Elijah." At that reply, the man looked at me expectantly with surprised eyes.

"You name it, Miss."

"Please call me Elena. There's no need to be formal with me either." My words made him smile although he clearly didn't agree to it. But he seemed to temporarily accept it.

"Very well, Elena. I am very glad to meet you as well. Shall I help you with your bags?" he asked while glancing towards my bags.

"Oh, yes, please. Thank you very much, Elijah."

"That's not a problem. After all, it is my job." I noticed that Elijah smiled as he said that. Next thing I knew we were walking to the sunny car park outside the airport – now, this is why I loved L.A. already – the weather was simply perfect for me: sunny and about a thousand degrees. After packing my luggage in the car, Elijah spoke again whilst driving out of the car park.

"I trust you had a pleasant flight, Miss Elena?" His words made me smile despite me having the worst morning ever. Part of it was because he still called me Miss. Well, at least he didn't use my last name anymore.

"I wouldn't quite call it pleasant. I'm really sorry about the two-hour delay. I hope it didn't mess up your plans."

"That was no issue Miss. I disposed of enough time to have some lunch whilst waiting for your plane to land. What happened though? The airlines never have such delays from what I know." He reassured me by smiling and I could see the sincerity of his words in his reflection in the mirror. I huffed in exasperation as I answered.

"Well, the co-pilot apparently got sick right after boarding the plane. So they had to find another pilot to replace him. Which took about 2 hours time…" The tension in my voice was definitely there – Elijah had heard it as well.

"That is quite misfortunate. At least you arrived here safely Miss. That is the most important thing." Elijah's words reminded me of my father's personality – always calm and seeing the bright side of things. I wish I had turned out more like him. Instead, I had inherited my mother's short-temper which I tried to repress each and every day of my life.

"I believe you're right…" After a moment of hesitation I got enough courage to ask "Elijah?"

"Yes, Miss?" Came the perfectly polite answer as always. I liked Elijah already – by the way he talked you could tell that he came from another generation.

"Is it okay for me to ask where we are going? I know it sounds like a stupid question but I was never informed of the address where I was going to live." His answer came as no surprise to me.

"Yes, I am aware of what has been planned for you, Miss. However, I don't see why I couldn't tell you the exact location. In about 45 minutes we shall be arriving in Malibu Beach." I instantly felt like something got stuck in my throat. My first thought was that I completely misunderstood. But then I realized that it wasn't really anything out of the ordinary – it was extremely believable. After all, my boss was an important person from what I had heard from Mrs. Dobbs. Instead of voicing my doubts I chose to ask something else.

"What is it like there, Elijah?" I was sure he could notice the nervousness in my voice. I couldn't hide it anymore; this was going way too fast – and especially for me: a simple babysitter from New York city.

"I for one quite fancy it – calm, sunny most of the time, beautiful but without the hassle of Los Angeles city centre. There aren't too many people living there but I prefer it especially because of that. You'll be seeing it quite soon Miss."

_There aren't many people living there?_ He must have been joking because from what I had read in magazines Malibu Beach was one of the most expensive and luxurious places to live in the United States. Not to mention that all movie stars would pay big bucks to snatch a mansion on the 21-mile strip of Pacific coastline that was Malibu Beach. I just couldn't believe it – Malibu Beach? MALIBU BEACH? I was expecting to live in a secluded village away from the hustle and bustle of the big city – in a peaceful house; well, as peaceful as it could get with 4 kids running about. But never had I expected to be going to Malibu Beach of all places. My head was spinning and the only words I could utter were:

"That sounds nice…" Elijah looked at me through the rear-view mirror and held my gaze for a few seconds whilst trying to calm me down.

"Don't worry, Miss Elena, I am sure that you will enjoy it." His voice was affectionate and assuring.

"I hope so…" I couldn't help but feel my gaze drop to my interlocked hands that were fidgeting whilst resting on my lap. I always did that when I felt nervous about something – it was one of my most annoying habits. Elijah's warm voice made me look up again.

"I am positive that you will fit in well with the family." He seemed to know – he seemed to be so sure of it. I wanted so much to believe him. I couldn't help but ask…

"How can you be so sure? I don't mean it as an insult, but you've only known me for 15 minutes, Elijah." It took him only a second to answer back.

"I am not 50 years old for nothing, Miss. Don't you worry, everything will be just fine."

That was the last phrase I heard from Elijah before I helplessly fell asleep on the back seat of the Mercedes Benz that was taking me to my new life in Malibu Beach of all places…

* * *

Jennifer Aniston, Tom Hanks, Robert De Niro, Pierce Brosnan and Steven Spielberg are only a few celebrity names that owned houses in Malibu Beach the moment I arrived at 128 Cliffside Drive. In earnest, I had completely missed the whole journey through busy L.A. after falling asleep. I guess you could tell what a long day I had had. I woke up at exactly 6.05 pm to find myself still in the back of Elijah's car outside a huge blue iron gate surrounded by what seemed to be a very tall and thick cream-colored wall. Inside the estate I could see different types of tall trees providing shadow all over the front bit of the probably huge yard. I could not spot anything but a few yards as the trees were so thick that they could hide any building from people passing by.

From what I gathered first, Elijah was in front of the gate with a mobile phone in his right hand and he seemed a tad annoyed about something. Before I could think of any possible reason for his visible discomfort I saw him turn around and wave at me as he realized I was awake. Somehow, after knowing him for only an hour I already liked Elijah. As I saw him putting the phone in his pocket and coming towards the car I quickly drew my hand through my hair to tame it down – I wanted to look presentable; at least on my first day. I realized that the perfect image I had planned for this day had already crumbled down to pieces but the least I could do was try to look my best. For the sake of it. Especially since I would apparently be the nanny of Donald Trump's grandkids. My knees started shaking at the thought of how powerful and rich my new boss could be. I was woken up from my day dream by the sound of a car door being slammed.

"How are you feeling Miss Elena? Better?" Elijah asked whilst looking at me through the rear view mirror with sympathetic eyes. I could feel my cheeks turning pink.

"Yes, I'm a bit better indeed. Thank you Elijah!"

"I am delighted to hear that! Please excuse me Miss, we had a problem with the gate just now and for some reason I couldn't manage to open it so I had to ring Mr. Salvatore. He'll be opening the gate in a few…" Just as he was uttering those words the sound of a screeching gate caught our attention.

"… seconds." Elijah smiled widely as he looked at me. "That didn't take too long… Well then, off we go Miss!" I tried to smile confidently as the car slowly made its way past the blue iron gates.

Words could not describe the beauty of the estate. When Elijah drove past the little forest that occupied the front yard I felt my breath get stuck in my throat as I first laid eyes on the house that would soon be my home. A beautiful shade of cream coloured the walls of the two-storey house contrasting with the light blue rooftop. On the right side of the house I could see a playground with brightly coloured swings, slides and a rock-about whilst the left side of the house had a special place containing a barbecue, beautiful glass table with matching chairs and a huge umbrella providing the shade needed for that sunny weather. The entire house was surrounded by bunches of flowers that made it look traditional and cosy in spite of its setting or the modern architecture. Overall the place looked like a true home and I already loved it.

The car suddenly came to a halt and Elijah quickly went out of the car. Next thing I knew he had opened the door closest to me and gently helped me out of the car in the most polite way possible. I smiled and thanked him whilst trying not to gawk at the house much longer. In my pitiful adoration of the gorgeous estate I did not realize that a man had come out of the house and was standing at the top of the stairs examining me.

From one look I could see that he was wearing a pale green shirt and long white trousers. His hair was short but you could tell that he had used a fair amount of hair gel to give it the neat appearance that it now had. Somehow I could tell only by his appearance that he must have had an important job - he looked like he did. But there was something else about him that made me figure him out immediately – he seemed sweet, kind and extremely young for a widower with four children. I couldn't contain my curiosity any longer - I wanted to see what he was like especially since I knew that I would be working for him from now on. As my brown eyes locked with his green ones he smiled and quickly came down the stairs to shake my hand and introduce himself. His voice was low and friendly.

"Elena Gilbert, am I right?" he questioned his own words whilst gently shaking my hand. He seemed as if he wanted to be 100% sure of my name as if it were a vital thing.

"Yes, that would be me." My feeble attempt of replying quickly came; outside I was trying to smile; on the inside I was shaking of nervousness.

"I've heard many good things about you Elena. It's really nice to finally meet you." His genuine smile helped me relax - my previously tensed muscles relaxed as I already felt at ease with him. "My name is Stefan Salvatore."

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**_Cannot wait to see what you guys think! :) Until next time.._**


	6. Chapter 6 Strangers in the night

_**Author's note: Hello everybody! I'd like to thank you for the comments I got on the last chapter. I was very surprised to see such mixed feelings regarding my story. I'd like to apologize about taking so long until Damon finally came into the picture – to be honest, I've been thinking so much about what the story should be like from this point. I couldn't make up my mind for a while and after I read your reviews I was even more confused about your expectations. But I have decided to stick to the way I pictured the story in the first place. So here goes nothing – hopefully you'll enjoy this chapter as well! It's the one where most characters come into the picture so I hope that I managed to portray them well enough. ENJOY! **_

_**P.S. The title of chapter 6 is inspired by Frank Sinatra's song "Strangers in the night"**_

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**CHAPTER 6 – STRANGERS IN THE NIGHT**

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"It's a pleasure to meet you as well Mr. Salvatore." Only God knows how much I meant that phrase – in earnest, I had been waiting for this moment since the second I said yes to the job offer. The man smiled and started shaking his head as he looked at me surprised. I was taken aback by his reaction – had I said something wrong? I didn't think so. I instantly blushed as I started questioning whether I looked decent enough after all. He looked at me apologetically after seeing my embarrassed expression and replied.

"I'm sorry about that Elena. The way you said my name simply amused me." For a second there I stopped questioning my mental sanity and started questioning his. He carried on quickly seeming embarrassed by his outburst.

"My apologies for that. I didn't mean to offend you or anything – I simply like people to call me Stefan. Not Mr. Salvatore – it's way too mouth-filling for me." Curiously I wouldn't have thought that my boss would be so informal. Not by his appearance at least. But for some reason he seemed genuinely laid back so I just played along with it.

"No worries, I don't get offended that easily." _And…that was my first lie. Ok, keep smiling and everything will be ok_. "As long as you don't mind me calling you by your first name, Sir…"

"Stefan, please…" he reassured me with a nod.

"…Stefan. I have no problem with it either." In the end he seemed to be – what? About 5-6 years older than me. So I kind of understood where he came from regarding the name situation.

"Good. If you feel ready, may I invite you inside the house?" I must admit, Stefan's smile did grow on me. I felt myself smiling as well. Also, his politeness reminded me instantly of Elijah's kind way.

"Of course. I've been waiting for this moment for a while now." I simply blurted out the truth for those were my true feelings at the moment.

As we started going up the stairs I involuntarily turned back as I remembered leaving my bag inside the car. Stefan caught my reaction immediately. He seemed a very perceptive person.

"Don't worry about your things, Elijah will take them up to your room in no time." My room – I admit - I liked the sound of that.

"Oh, thank you for that."

"You're welcome, Elena. I trust your journey was a pleasant one?" I could tell he was trying to chit chat. I wasn't in the mood for it but nonetheless I did my best to create a pleasant conversation.

"It could've been better I guess. The two-hour delay didn't help. I'm really sorry about that – I knew you were expecting me two hours earlier."

By the time Stefan replied, I was again gawking as we came inside the main hallway of the house. Most of the house was cream-colored on the inside with subtle touches of red, blue and white. You could tell that a woman had arranged it in that way.

"That was no problem for me Elena. You could've been late another two hours as far as I'm concerned. I had the day off anyway." He didn't seem to try to be nice with me at all. I loved his sincerity.

"Plus, I couldn't wait to meet you. I already consider you part of the family…" That touched me to my core. I didn't have any words…

"Thank you so much for that, Sir…" My smile grew inexplicably.

"Now, Elena, you're probably tired from the long trip so I won't keep you with me for much longer. Since it's Saturday evening, here's what we're going to do. I'll give you a quick tour of the house and then you can have some dinner – with us or on your own (it's your choice) and then you can go settle down in your new room. But… before that, there are four kids that can't wait to meet their new nanny."

At that point I became nervous – I was always like that. Excited and so nervous I couldn't breathe properly. Meeting the children was the biggest challenge of my job. I knew very well that the first impression counted a lot – even when it came to kids. So I braced myself and tried to gather more courage for this moment. The only thing that was dancing in my mind was "_Four kids… FOUR_". Something I had never come across before in my career. Stefan must have sensed my feelings for he looked at me sympathetically and asked.

"Is that… okey with you?" I had never had such a nice boss in my entire life. Usually they would tell me what to do not ask me if I agreed with it. I felt so happy – and just hoped that this would last.

"It's perfect, Sir."

"Stefan please…" he seemed amused by me calling him Sir again.

"Stefan..."

"Ok, so let's go upstairs to the playroom. That's where they all were the last time I checked."

We slowly made our way to the wide staircase and up until the first floor. The house wasn't what I expected in that it wasn't as luxurious as it could've been. Don't get me wrong – you could tell that my boss was rich. But everything that was in it screamed Home. I couldn't explain it. It gave me a sense of safety and peace. Something I had never experienced before apart from my own childhood home. The playroom was the first room on the right as we went up the stairs. Before we went in I could hear their cute squeaky voices from the hallway. That is when Stefan turned around and told me.

"Now, don't get too scared. There are many people inside so embrace yourself. I'm sure you'll do good, Elena." I got confused about his words but I didn't have time to think them through before I went in.

"Hello, you noisy ones." At that point five faces turned around to stare at the man who interrupted their activities.

"I've come baring gifts." The silence was broken by a little girl who came running out of nowhere and latched onto my boss's neck after he gently picked her up in his arms.

"What gifts?" the little girl asked.

"Well, this is Elena. From now on she's going to be your nanny, kids." At that point everybody turned around and looked at me. I felt self-conscious for a split second.

"Hello to you all!" I replied. The little girl in my boss's arms replied first.

"She's pretty!" And then everybody else started laughing thus causing me to blush uncontrollably.

"Yes, I dare say she is pretty, Anna." said Stefan. He quickly said to the little girl then got all tensed up for a certain reason.

"But please don't tell Caroline I said that." He really seemed serious about that. I wondered who Caroline was. Anna started laughing. Probably his girlfriend from what it sounded like.

"I won't tell on you, uncle Stefan! Not if you give me some sweeties." I swear that my blood seemed to freeze in my veins for a second. Uncle?

"Sweeties? So that is how you blackmail me, duckling? No sweeties for you until after dinner." Stefan cheerfully said.

I decided that I must have misunderstood the little girl. Surely Stefan was their father – he seemed to love them all so much. But there was confusion written all over my face. In the end, I had to admit that I knew nothing about what was happening here. Stefan turned around to face me.

"This cheeky one here is Anna. She's only four." She smiled at me and asked.

"How old are you, Elena?" her angel voice made me a bit more relaxed.

"I'm 20 years old sweety."

"Woooow, you're really grown up." Anna's reply made me laugh.

"I suppose I am…" Stefan smiled at me and went back to his presentation.

"This little one here is John" He said while turning to a middle aged woman who was feeding the young one some soup. "He's only two but I'm sure he'll be the hardest to catch around here. It's like he caught wings since he started walking properly." Both John and Anna had brown hair and brown eyes. They looked very much alike. The young boy looked at me with curious eyes, not really understanding what was going on.

"And this is Jenna. She helps around the house with cooking and cleaning." The woman was encouraging me with her smile. I couldn't resist her- she seemed the most good-hearted creature I had ever laid eyes on. Maybe it was her red hair or her gorgeous green eyes that made her look like an angel; but she did – so very much.

"Hello Elena. It's nice to finally meet you." I didn't get it. Why did everybody say "finally". It's like they knew about me for a long time. Nonetheless, Jenna's voice reminded me of my mother and that made me very emotional for a second there.

"It's nice to meet you as well." I meant it. Plus, I was happy that I would have a female friend around the house.

"Then here we have Tyler." A little boy with blue eyes and black hair stood up from the floor and came to shake my hand in a very polite yet vigorous way.

"Hello, Elena. My name is Tyler, I am 8 years old and very glad to meet you." The fact that he seemed too serious for a boy his age took me completely by surprise. He was the first one that I felt had been affected by his mother's loss.

"Same here, Tyler." I said as sweetly as possible as I shook his hand. He went back to his Lego in silence. I felt the need to go and hug him for some reason but Stefan's voice pulled me out of my daydream.

"And last but not least this is Rebekah."

I directed my gaze towards the corner furthest away from the entrance. There I could see a slim and tall figure staring back at me. The girl's hair was long and blonde and contrasted with her beautiful green eyes. She couldn't be older than thirteen but seemed much more mature by the way she was standing and looking me in the eye – almost defiantly. Stefan seemed to be accustomed to the girl's behaviour and carried on, though a bit more reluctantly.

"She is the eldest of the children – She'll be turning 12 in a month from now." Rebekah continued to stare at me without saying anything. The silence was deafening. I could see Stefan's expression slowly changing from serene to embarrassed. He tried to regain control upon the situation.

"Rebekah, darling, why don't you come here and say hi to your new nanny?" I could tell that the little girl would do no such thing. She seemed as if she wanted to burn holes in my entire body. The expression "If looks could kill…" came to my mind. I started feeling uncomfortable and I could clearly see that Stefan felt the same. I thought I might as well try to sort things out.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Rebekah." I started off a bit nervously. I regained my composure though.

"I hope you and I shall be good friends." And it was true – I really did hope we would get along. It was a surprise for me to see the little girl walking towards me with her head held high. The moment she stopped in front of me I half expected what came next. She truly seemed an adult when she looked me in the eye and opened her mouth to speak.

"I require neither your friendship nor your services as a nanny. I am completely capable of taking care of myself." She kept her defiant stare and tone of voice whilst talking to me.

"Rebekah…" Stefan gently said. The girl didn't even wince.

"Just because father hired you to look after us doesn't mean that I am going to listen to you – a complete stranger who does it only for the money."

"Rebekah!" I could tell Stefan was getting angrier but he never raised his tone.

"I think that's enough.." Stefan added. The girl nodded and smiled for the first time.

"I agree with you. There's nothing more to do here. I'll be in my room." Rebekah stormed out of the playroom leaving three adults with their mouths open. What truly shocked me though was the way she had talked to her father – and the way Stefan hadn't done anything to stop her. Not that I could blame him. Rebekah seemed so upset – not only was she not a child anymore but I could tell that her heart was full of sorrow. I couldn't help but pity her.

Stefan put Anna on the ground as he turned around to Jenna and exchanged a sad look with her.

"Should I go after her?" Jenna sympathetically asked. I didn't expect Stefan's answer though.

"Just leave her – she won't talk to anyone in this state. You know what Rebekah's like." I could see Jenna silently nodding. Stefan was upset about the girl – and this was clearly a recurring event. Nonetheless Stefan looked at me and embarrassed as he was, asked me if we could go on the corridor leaving Jenna to take care of the other kids.

I started fidgeting uncontrollably, locking my hands and turning my fingers as a crazy person. I couldn't recover from what had just happened. Never in my life had I encountered such a child – not that there hadn't been kids who didn't like me in the beginning. But I felt as if Rebekah utterly hated me. And for no reason as well... I knew they were all troubled kids but I had not expected her reaction. I exhaled heavily as I realized how much work I truly had to do in this house.

"I'm really sorry about what happened earlier." Stefan gently said. I didn't have words to reply.

"It's okey, it's not your fault. I just didn't expect that."

"I'm sure you didn't. Out of all of them Rebekah has been the most affected one. When their mother passed away the children all changed apart from John who didn't really know what was happening. I'm afraid you'll be encountering such problems with Rebekah on a regular basis."

"I was afraid of that." I felt my hand involuntarily go through my hair as I was trying to think things through. I quickly went on.

"But don't worry, I **will** try and sort things out with her. You need a lot of patience to deal with a child – let alone with a child that is in pain." Stefan silently nodded.

"I'm sorry I couldn't stop her earlier when she was attacking you. The thing is that my brother doesn't like it when other people apart from him and Jenna interfere when it comes to the children. He has a bunch of strict rules about that – as you will later see when you talk to him." My eyebrows involuntarily raised in confusion. What was he on about? And then it struck me… My jaw dropped a few millimeters as I looked Stefan in the eye.

"Stefan, I'm sorry for asking, but who is your _brother_?" My question, yet simple and seemingly normal made Stefan's eyes grow bigger than ever. His confusion was short-lived as he realized what I was talking about. His tone was very surprised, on the brink of shock, when he started talking.

"God… My brother didn't tell you anything did he?" By the look of my sulked expression Stefan answered his own question. He started angrily laughing and shaking his head in frustration.

"Typical… He loves all of this secrecy stuff." I could see Stefan struggling with the situation – it must have been quite embarrassing and frustrating and I kind of felt sorry for him. I watched as he leaned against the wall and turned to look at me.

"My apologies, Elena, I thought he had contacted you personally. Or at least that he told the agency you work at about all of this. My brother is the children's father and your boss. He would have been here today to welcome you in his home but his job didn't let him be present at the time you arrived. So he asked me to come and welcome you to your new home." My dumbstruck expression must have made him want to explain more since he carried on.

"My brother wanted very much to talk to you personally about the children, your job here and many other things. So he asked me to tell you that he would be having a long conversation with you after he came back. But unfortunately when it comes to his career, he is very unpredictable regarding times when he is at home or away. Which means that he could come back right now or in a weeks time. I'm sorry that I cannot reveal his name either – that is something else about my brother. We're not allowed to give you any details before he talks to you first."

I felt my head starting to spin as Stefan's words started sinking in. Where had I come? And what kind of crazy man was I even working for? Something about this whole story was very wrong but I couldn't put my finger on it.

"Elena, I'm really sorry – I understand how you must be feeling. But don't worry. My brother, despite his strict rules and demands, is a genuinely good person. I reckon he must have just forgotten to mention all of this to you. And he does have his reasons for not telling you about all this beforehand. Please don't worry too much – I'm sure you can't wait to get settled in your room and have a good night's sleep, am I right?" His sympathetic smile won me over.

"I _am_ pretty tired. Would it be ok if I went to my room now to unpack?" I couldn't take any more events tonight.

"Of course. I'm sure Elijah already brought everything there."

We slowly went down the corridor whilst Stefan presented all the other rooms to me. To be fair, I was listening to him but no word that was coming out of his mouth really stuck in my head. I had load other thoughts that were running through it. We suddenly came to a stop.

"I'm sure you'll find the room decent. You have your private bathroom inside and hopefully enough space for all your things. When you get hungry just go downstairs to the kitchen and ask Jenna for some dinner although I'm sure she'll come and bring you dinner tonight. Elijah will give you a key to the house just in case you want to walk around the front yard or on the beach – you're free to do that at any time. I will be staying here tonight in the guestroom since Damon isn't home – just in case something happens. You can bother me at any time if you need anything. I hope that you'll be fine. Any questions?"

"No, not at all. Thank you very much for everything Stefan."

"No worries, Elena. Have a good night!"

* * *

I helplessly stared at the clock: 11:51 pm. I'd been trying to sleep so badly for the past hour but somehow, every time I felt my eyes getting heavy, Rebekah's face came into my head and wouldn't go away. I was so tired that I couldn't even think straight. Too many events had happened in such a short period of time.

Truth be told, I was not prepared for any of this. And I felt as if it would keep on coming. I needed to talk to somebody – desperately. The only person I could think of was Bonnie. I looked at the time again: 11:52 pm. I groaned in frustration for two reasons – 1) I would have given anything to sleep and 2) I needed to speak to Bonnie. Now, I couldn't call her because New York was 4 hours ahead of Los Angeles. So I was only left with one problem – not being able to sleep. I thought I was going to pull my hair out if I didn't manage to fall asleep. My eyes involuntarily fell on the table across the room where the keys to the house were.

I had to – otherwise I would go crazy staying in this room. So I quickly changed into a purple coloured dress and carefully sneaked out of the house.

* * *

Getting out of the house was no problem – everybody had probably fallen asleep and I was known for being quiet and sneaky as a cat. Somehow I ended up on the beach – the actual Malibu Beach. I had always dreamed of being here; I had always pictured this kind of life to be glamorous and exciting. Reality was so different from my imagination.

I started walking around thinking about how I ended up here. It was strange how 24 hours ago I was on my cosy couch in New York city together with Bonnie, helplessly asleep and probably dreaming of ponies and rainbows. And now here I was in Malibu Beach – on the actual beach – working for God-knows-who, being hated by his daughter and feeling completely miserable. I got up from the sand floor and started slowly walking down the beach. I was probably completely crazy for walking on the beach at midnight but I figured it was Malibu Beach of all places – if I wasn't safe here, where would I be safe?

After a few minutes I figured that I should be turning around – no point walking any longer at this time. As I turned around my breath completely froze in my neck as I saw a man standing at about 3 metres in front of me. At first I thought he wanted to mug me or do something else. But then I realized that he couldn't be anywhere close to a thief – he must have been one of the people living here. The man was handsome – that I had to admit. He had a tall and slim figure, big blue eyes, raven-black hair and he was dressed completely in black – from his short-sleeved shirt to his sandals. He couldn't have been more than 30…

"Katherine…" Confusion swept across my features as the stranger called me like that. He must have thought he knew me from somewhere. Although realizing that he had no bad intentions, I instinctively turned around to look if other people were there. At the house closest to where we were standing there was a big party so there were a lot of lights and people.

"No…" My voice sounded confused "I'm Elena." I noticed his features going from hopeful to disappointed and then confused. Somehow he realized his error and slowly replied.

"Oh… You just look…" He was struggling to put his feelings into words. How I knew what that was like...

"I'm sorry, you just really remind me of someone…" He came about a metre closer to me and kept staring at me as if he couldn't believe his eyes. I felt a bit self-conscious and weird about this whole thing. But there was something about him that made me freeze in my place carefully examining every bit of his face. He seemed to pull it back together after a split second.

"I'm Damon." He friendly said. He kept looking at me with obvious curiosity.

"Not to be rude or anything, Damon, but it's pretty creepy that you're out here on the beach at this time in the night." I reluctantly said.

"You're the one to talk? You're out here all by yourself." He did get me there. Damon flashed a crooked smile that instantly gave me goose bumps.

"It's Malibu Beach – what could possibly happen here?" He silently nodded whilst showing a smile that had many untold questions in it. He kept looking at me with interest.

"You're probably right about that." I instantly felt my smile turn into a straight line as somehow yesterday's events came running into my head once again. I tried to hide it but it was already too late.

"Are you ok? You seem a bit… lost." Surprised to have been caught, my first instinct was to lie about it. But then something inside me made me feel like I could trust this person. Even though I only knew his name.

"It's just… It's been hard for me lately." I willingly said and couldn't believe my idiocy.

"What has been hard?" Damon asked and then raised his hands. "If I may ask.." On the whole, he seemed to be a very nice man.

"Life… The future… I chose this seemingly incredible job that brought me here to L.A. and now… " I stopped as I thought about my words.

"You don't want it?" He asked pulling me out of my reverie. That was the million dollar question indeed… I answered sincerely again .

"I don't know what I want…"

"Well that's not true." Damon said gently yet confidently.

"You want what everybody wants..." His assuring way was mesmerizing – it was like he already knew it all. I felt my lips curve into a smile and my playful side finally came out.

"What? A mysterious stranger who has all the answers?" I was half-shocked as I realized that I was subtly flirting with him… It was so not me… But he seemed amused by my reply and briefly laughed before turning towards me again.

"Well, let's just say I've been around more than you have. I've learned some things…" Strangely enough, he wasn't patronizing me or anything.

"So, Damon, tell me… What is it that I want?" To be honest, I was very curious to see what he was going to say.

"You want a simple yet fulfilling life – a secure job that you enjoy… a few good friends that put a smile on your face on rainy days… your loving family next to you…" He paused for a bit before he continued. I felt my smile fading away as I listened in awe to what he was saying.

"But most of all, you want a love that consumes you…" Damon slowly closed the distance between us as he went on. My breathing sped up.

"You want passion and adventure…" I bet he could see that he was mesmerizing me. I felt like an open book at that moment.

"…and even a little danger." He had followed my expression closely and was trying to find something in it. I didn't let him though.

"So, what do _you_ want?" Damon actually seemed confused at the sound of my question. He went on in a seemingly sad tone while shaking his head.

"My life is more complicated than you can imagine…." If only he knew what _mine_ was like… Damon stared at me intently as he answered my question.

"I want you to find everything that you're looking for." I could feel it in every cell in my body that he meant it. And it made me question all of this even more. I was entranced by his presence.

"But right now I need to leave. It was a pleasure meeting you Elena. Good night!"

And with that he disappeared in the night walking along the same way I had been going a few minutes before. I felt completely stunned by what had just happened. Never in my life had I met someone who entranced me as much as Damon had just done. After a few seconds I wondered if the events had been reality or just a dream. One thing was sure - Damon didn't feel real...

I slowly walked back to the house wondering if I would never see him again…

* * *

_**I'm partly sorry for stealing the whole idea from Vampire Diaries Season 3 episode 22 when Damon first met Elena. It's just that it's one of my favorite Delena moments so I thought it appropriate to put it in this story as well. So... WHAT DO YOU GUYS THINK OF CHAPTER 6? Until next time... :)  
**_


	7. Chapter 7 Complicated

**_Author's note: I would like to thank you all for the support you've shown me after reading Chapter 6 of my story. I was so impressed by your excited and encouraging reviews – it brings me a lot of happiness to see that you, my readers, are enjoying my story. I intend to keep up the good work as much as I can – I have a lot of ideas regarding future chapters and I dare say that there are still many to come in Give me love. Some of you have said and asked me a few things which I will answer now as well – _**

**Dark-Supernatural-Angel_, thank you for pointing out the words that came out as "reBonnie; actuBonnie, etc" in __Chapter 3__. The reason for that is that I named the character Ally in the beginning; And then I replaced "Ally" with "Bonnie" in Word and it replaced everything with Bonnie. I did double check it – I don't know how the mistake got there. And for that I apologize! _**

**Delenawolve_s__, the idea for my story is a combination of more things – The sound of music, Jane Eyre and many other babysitting movies I've watched until now. I'm not planning to copy anything but I like selecting and mixing up ideas from different stories and movies _**

**Lauren121_3, thank you again for offering to help me with the story! _**

_**And last but not least I apologize for a big mistake I made in Chapter 6 – when Stefan tells Elena " Damon isn't here…" it should have been "my brother isn't here" since he hadn't told Elena his name. Sorry about that! **_

**_You guys are all great and I love writing stories for you to read! Anyways, sorry for the long intro – this is Chapter 7 – the title is inspired from Avril Lavigne's song "Complicated"! Have fun! _**

* * *

**CHAPTER 7 – COMPLICATED**

* * *

I woke up the next morning with the sound of sea gulls ringing in my ears. I turned around in my bed and tried to open my eyes but was temporarily blinded by the sun coming in through the ceiling-high windows that surrounded two walls of my room. I sat up and serenely noted that I had forgotten to close a window and pull the curtains the night before. The beauty of the Ocean beckoned me out of bed and I found myself standing in the middle of the room admiring the Pacific in all its glory. I felt my smile making its way onto my lips – it was like I had just fallen in love.

The obvious explanation for my joy was the surreal view that I was blessed with when I moved in this house. It gave a whole new sense to the word "beautiful"… But of course the real reason for my happiness was Damon… the mysterious stranger I had met the previous night on the beach. His words were still ringing in my ears sending butterflies to my stomach as I remembered his sweet voice and gorgeous blue eyes. I realized though that my memory of him would soon fade away until I could never again remember his face or even what had really happened that night. I knew for a fact that it was a one-time event that I would never live again – after all, it had been too good to be true.

But even despite my acknowledgement of reality I still couldn't stop smiling. Not even when Rebekah's hateful expression came back into my mind. I knew that I would eventually get to the bottom of the feelings she had for me. I simply needed a lot of patience to deal with her – I knew that underneath the mask she was wearing there was still a child inside. A child desperate for attention and love that just didn't know how to ask for them anymore... I knew what that felt like so much… when you feel like there's no one there to hear you crying out for help. I stopped myself from going on. Images were cramming in my head with the speed of light and I stopped right there and then. I couldn't let things get to me again – they were in the past and I intended to keep them there. I had a new life now and I was finally happy – even though it was because of a random stranger I had met on the beach.

I briefly looked at the watch and was amazed at the early hour – 8:30 a.m. on a Sunday. That meant I had been blessed with 7 hours of sleep. And I felt amazing – full of energy and ready for my first day with the kids. I didn't really feel tired so I quickly made my way to the shower, brushed my teeth and then went to my small but beloved wardrobe. _What to pick?_ That was my all-time favorite question and predicament when it came to my day-to-day life. I glanced at the weather outside: sunny with no clouds. _Conclusion?_ Knee-length white shorts, a navy-blue t-shirt and white comfy sandals would be perfect. Before leaving my room I braided my hair in a rush whilst I kept dancing around doing my favorite tango moves. I was excited and I couldn't contain it any more. I looked myself in the mirror and for the first time in what felt like ages I said to myself:

"Elena Gilbert, today will be different. It has to be… You will smile and it will be believable. Your smile will say _I'm fine, thank you_. You will start fresh and be someone new. You owe it to yourself."

* * *

I went down the corridor in silence so that I didn't wake anybody up. I wondered if I should be waking the kids on a Sunday morning, if I should have been in their bedrooms right now dressing them up, helping them brush their teeth and combing their hair. In earnest, I had no idea how the household functioned. I figured they wouldn't have liked crazy hyper Elena going in all their rooms and waking them up military style. Only that instead of the horn used by superiors my high pitched voice would be the sound torturing them.

Suddenly I heard a sound coming from downstairs – most probably from the kitchen by the smell that was creeping its way to the first floor. I decided it would probably be Jenna this early in the morning. So I turned right to go down the stairs whilst humming a random song that was stuck in my head. By the time I got to the end of the stairs I was surprised to see Rebekah of all people coming out of the kitchen holding an apple in her hand. I had to admit, she looked gorgeous in her long white night gown – almost like an angel. She took one look at my face, clearly upset by the sight of me and was preparing to walk right past me as I turned around and addressed her. _More like an angel with horns…_

"Good morning, Rebekah. How are you today?" I said in my sweetest voice possible. She had the common sense to turn around and give me a few seconds of her precious time.

"Good morning… Well, I was better before **you** came down…" So she was extra bitchy this morning. _Great…_ No worries - I wouldn't be going down without a fight.

"I'm happy to see we're getting along already." She looked at me as if I was delusional. I reminded myself that an 11- year old doesn't really get sarcasm.

"Look, Rebekah, I really do want us to get along. I'm very sorry if I did anything to upset you yesterday. I didn't mean to. I guess I don't know you yet, but I will learn in time what you like and don't like. It's a two-way process until we get to know each other and become friends. Now if you agree, I'd love it if we could start over again. What do you say?" I awaited her response expectantly, hoping that I would somehow get closer to her. After a brief pause the two things that escaped her mouth were:

"Bite me." She had spoken in the same defiant way as the day before. By the time I got my head around it she was already up the stairs and disappeared from my sight. Again she left me speechless and with my mouth hanging open.

I couldn't believe the nerve that kid had. Usually I could overcome any negative emotions inflicted upon me by a child – when they were hurting, cranky, sleepy, hungry ; I had been through them all. But I could tell that she was doing it on purpose. Unless she had a serious case of PMS – which I doubted. I was embarrassed to feel tears starting to gather in my eyes; for some reason Rebekah always seemed to find my weakness and exploit it. I feared that it wouldn't be the last time she was going to ruin my Sunday morning. I closed my eyes for a second and started whispering to myself:

"Come on, Elena, calm down, you did your best. You'll just keep on trying until you succeed." I was preparing to exhale heavily when a voice suddenly made me jump.

"You really did your best, Elena…" it was Jenna talking. She was leaning against the kitchen door carrying a sympathetic smile on her face.

"You heard that?" I asked. Jenna simply nodded as she sensed my growing sadness. She slowly made her way towards me and put both her hands on my shoulders in a very motherly fashion.

"You did your best, Elena. I could see it." She reminded me so much of my mother. Before I went down that path I started in a weak voice.

"I don't know what to say about that, Jenna. She seems to hate me pretty much." The moment I said the words I regretted them. I didn't know Jenna that well and for all I knew she could go and tell my boss all about it. My fear was short-lived though.

"Don't worry too much about it, my dear. Rebekah hates nannies in general – it's not **you** who she hates for a particular reason. She's had so many of them before that she can't deal with them anymore." Jenna said in her angelic voice. She beckoned me to follow her in the kitchen. I followed her whilst continuing the conversation.

"I don't know what to do about it though. She doesn't seem to want anything to do with me." Jenna silently nodded as she was pouring water in some huge pots and putting them on the stove.

"Rebekah is complicated, Elena… I wish you had met her before their mother died; she was so full of life, always happy – when she didn't sing she would run around the house dancing. God, she was a pleasure to have around. I've known her since she was born – that's when the late Mrs Salvatore hired me. I tell you, Rebekah was the life of this house- together with her mother." Jenna paused whilst probably remembering something from the past. I kept quiet as I listened carefully to what she was saying.

"But then she changed so much six months ago. She started treating everybody differently - even when it came to me… She didn't want to have anything to do with us all – she would lock herself in her room and stay there for hours without seeing anybody. We were all so worried about her but then after a while she started being her old self again – she was never the same of course but still she's been trying to recover ever since I reckon." Jenna stopped as she probably realized she had said too much. I felt it was time for me to cut in.

"I feel sorry for her, Jenna. I can tell that underneath that adult-like mask lies a little girl wanting to come out again. I just wish I knew how I could get just a bit closer to her and then help her." Jenna smiled at me nostalgically.

"I wish I knew as well, Elena…" I was hoping for a more helpful reply but I didn't mind not getting it. I still couldn't get over how kind and friendly Jenna could be. "I'm sure you'll figure it out in the end though." She said. I was starting to have my doubts about that.

"Would you like some help with the pots of tea, Jenna?" I hastily asked her.

"Oh thank you very much sweetheart, but you don't have to do that. You should rest, you had a long day yesterday." I appreciated her concern.

"I had enough rest last night. Plus, I enjoy helping, especially when it comes to food and meals."

"Ok then. If you can, please put them on the table in the dining room, will you?"

"Sure, no problem." I started making my way to the hallways but turned around and looked at her helplessly whilst holding the tea pots in both my hands.

"Umm… I don't really know which one is the dining room…" Jenna started laughing as she realized my lack of orientation skills.

"Oh, sorry about that – I keep forgetting you've just arrived here. It's the first room to the left. You can't miss it.'"

I left the kitchen in haste since the tea pots were starting to get too warm for my taste. As I came in the dining room I couldn't help but be in awe by the beauty of the room. To the left there was a huge glass table surrounded by cream chairs, placed facing the beach. The right side of the room contained a few drawers probably full with cutlery and dishes of all sorts. Quite a few number of paintings were hanging on the walls each depicting gorgeous views such as sunsets, a countryside forest, a field full of huge poppies and so on. I could see that the 12 person dining table had been very carefully decorated this morning – although only half of it.

After placing the tea pots on the table I returned to the kitchen in a rush to help Jenna a bit more. I found her pouring some fresh water in two brown jugs and placing them on a tray.

"By the way, Mr. Salvatore arrived last night, Elena." That sentence was enough to make me alert again. I couldn't find any reply apart from this really stupid one.

"Really? Has he come home?"

"He has, sweetie, I've seen his car outside this morning. But I didn't hear a peep last night so I'm guessing he arrived really late and kept quiet not to wake us up. You'll be meeting him this morning. He's never late for Sunday breakfast – every week at exactly 9.15 a.m." She sounded very enthusiastic about having him here.

"That's a very strange time to have breakfast…" I commented whilst trying to process the information.

"Well, this is no ordinary family coming down and having breakfast." Jenna joked. I started laughing.

"Do you think he's excited to meet me?" I asked Jenna trying to seem cool about it but being extremely nervous on the inside. As I was awaiting her response was picked up the tray that had the two water jugs on it. Wow, they were heavier than I expected. Just then I heard a familiar male voice behind me.

"Oh, trust me, Miss Gilbert, I am **extremely** excited to meet you." Could I detect a bit of sarcasm in his voice?

Nevertheless, I nervously turned around to meet my new boss whilst still holding the tray in my hands. As I saw Mr. Salvatore's face my whole body froze and I felt more like a statue than a human being. Nothing in the world could have prepared me for this – I felt as if I couldn't breath as realization kicked in. My boss was no one other than… Damon. Yes, Damon - the man I had met last night on the beach.

"**You…**" By the sound of his surprised voice he hadn't realized who I was last night neither.

I suddenly felt hell breaking loose as I quickly put his first and last name together side by side – Damon… Salvatore. **Damon Salvatore** – it was ringing in my ears for a certain reason and I couldn't put my finger on it. Where did I know his name from? And then it hit me – harder than ever. Damon Salvatore – the **actor**… The actor I used to fancy quite a few years ago – correction, that I used to love. He was standing right in front of me looking even better than ever and… and… he was my boss – my **BOSS** of all people. Seeing his shocked expression made me realize what a ridiculous situation we were both in. Especially after last night…

_Oh my God_ – the memories from last night came swirling into my head and I felt so embarrassed about it. I couldn't help but feel my hands trembling and the next thing I knew I felt the tray losing its balance and the two jugs of water – when had I even taken those off the table? – came rolling down and landed right on Damon's – I mean my boss's blue jeans; and then landing with an incredibly noisy thud on the kitchen tiles breaking into probably thousands of pieces.

I can say with certainty that that moment right there had been the most embarrassing and stupid event in my entire life. I felt my cheeks going red and the moment I looked at my boss's pants I involuntarily put both my hands on my mouth whilst dropping the tray as well. Damon Salvatore – the Oscar-nominee actor was standing in his own kitchen in Malibu Beach with his pants soaking wet because I had just spilled two jugs of water directly on his crouch. I felt like I could bury my head in the ground like an ostridge and never come out again. I heard Jenna hastily asking if we were ok but I couldn't answer. His face was a mixture of surprise, anger and amusement. We were staring at each other until I couldn't take it anymore and said:

"I'm so sorry Sir…" Next thing I knew I was running out of the kitchen and up the stairs like a complete lunatic…

* * *

I never managed to reach my room. Somewhere after going up the stairs I simply collapsed on the floor leaning against the wall. I put my head in my hands and closed my eyes shut struggling to breathe properly. I refused to believe the scene that had just happened - it just couldn't have been real. Such a catastrophe... Just the memory of my boss's face after I had wet his jeans made me crimple in agony. He was… Damon… and not just mysterious charming Damon from the beach – no… He was sexy talented Damon Salvatore – the actor who had starred in romantic comedies and dramas and was desired by half the Earth's female population. And he also was a widower with four children. But most of all he was my boss out of all people. And I just couldn't bring myself to get over the way we had just met…

I went so nuts for a moment that I started thinking the best way to deal with the situation would be to quit and move back to New York. Luckily a door right next to me opened and sweet little Anna came out looking at me in a surprised manner. Just the sight of her made me forget about everything.

"Elena…?" she sleepily asked.

"Yes, sweetie? What is it?" I felt myself getting up in an instant and turning on my nanny mode.

"I think John just woke up – he's crying in his room. Should we call Jenna?" Just then I realized that there was a baby's upset voice coming from the room between Anna's and mine.

"No, honey, it's fine. Jenna's making breakfast now– I can take care of him. That's what I'm here for." She was absolutely adorable in her pink night gown. I approached her and started caressing her pink cheeks.

"Now… before I go to him, do you need any help with anything?" I gently asked.

"No, Elena… I'm a big girl." She seriously said.

"You certainly are Anna! If you need anything I'll be in John's room."

As I saw Anna going back to what-seemed-to-be her pink room, I slowly opened the door next to hers to find an upset John crying in his crib. He was wearing blue pjs with ducks on them and he was the cutest thing ever. I got to him in a second and took him in my arms. He seemed happy to get some attention.

"Hello you beautiful boy! Why the sad face? What's bothering you?" he looked back at me with the most curious expression while he was studying my features. I couldn't really get anything out of a two-year-old when it came to confessions so I thought about two reasons for crying – he was either hungry or needed a diaper change.

" Weeet… Eleeena." My eyes felt like they were about to fill up when I heard John speak for the first time with me. He pointed at his pants and that's when I realized that I still had it in me – could still figure out why a little kid was upset. I felt so proud of John for saying that.

"Yes, sweetie, you're wet. But don't you worry, I'm going to change your diaper…"

With that I gently laid John on the changing table and started my work. I smiled to myself as I remembered what it was like to do my job – it seemed that the past week since I accepted this job had been boring and empty without my constant reason for joy. I had forgotten how much happiness I could get from such a simple task as changing a toddler's diaper. I was amazed – I had never thought that I was so crazy about my job. But in earnest, I was – especially since I had seen all of the Salvatore kids in one room. Even Rebekah – in her quest to make my life miserable – was a child that brought me happiness. In a more annoying way but in the end I did like a challenge. The sound of the door opening pulled me out of my day dreaming.

"Elena!" a high pitched squeaky voice said.

I turned around to see who it was and was surprised to see a beautiful tall woman – about a few years older than me – flashing her whole set of teeth at me. I sensed that a long conversation was about to unfold from that point so I quickly put smiley little John back in his crib since I had already finished with him.

"Yes, that's me… Who do I have the pleasure of meeting?"

Out of nowhere the woman came and hugged me tightly as if she had known me for years. I admit that I freaked out a bit in the beginning but then I responded in spite of my natural instinct to back away. She did seem completely harmless in the end. When she finally released me from her embrace I could see her face better. She started in the same squeaky voice as before.

"I'm Caroline Forbes– Stefan's girlfriend." _Aaaah, the famous Caroline…_ "I'm so happy to finally meet you." Again – finally… Was it just me being paranoid or was everybody saying **finally **to me? In spite of my growing anxiety I couldn't help but notice Caroline's beauty – long blonde wavy hair tied in a fancy tail that came running down on the right side of her face; big blue eyes with shades of green through them and such long eyelashes; pig full pink lips; and her outfit that was spotless from head to toe – black and white striped t-shirt, white knee length skirt and high heels. Overall she looked like a Barbie doll. In other words, an extremely stylish woman – a true lady… I felt a bit weird standing right next to her – me the ugly duckling and her the swan.

"I'm happy to meet you as well, Miss Forbes… I heard about you yesterday from Anna."

"Oh no, no _Miss Forbes _with me Elena! You call me Caroline, I am your equal around here, okey? No need for so much politeness." Her words touched me to my core.

"Thank you, Caroline. I doubt that we are equal in any way but thank you nonetheless."

"We are equal – don't you ever forget that. I'm sure that we're going to be the best of friends, I can feel that already." I smiled at her enthusiasm. Once you got past the squeaky voice you could tell that Caroline was a sweet woman who apparently had very strong opinions about everything.

" Now, Elena… Breakfast is ready, I just came upstairs to check on little John and since I found you as well, we might as well all go downstairs. Everybody's there already, we just have to take John with us as well." I internally cringed at the thought of ever going downstairs again. I wondered if my job in this house had already ended after the earlier episode. Caroline must have sensed my discomfort for she had a very knowing expression on her face.

"I can't…go downstairs." Her eyes became big as she looked at me surprised.

"What are you talking about? Why?" I felt embarrassed but I decided that telling her the truth was my best option.

" I... spilled two jugs of water on Mr. Salvatore's pants earlier…" Caroline burst into laughter the second I finished my sentence.

"Was it Stefan?" she asked chuckling.

"No…it was actually my boss." Her laughter became even noisier this time.

"Damon? You spilled water on Damon?" She couldn't contain her laughter any more so she grabbed her stomach with both hands. " That is the funniest thing I have ever heard."

Seeing Caroline laugh so hard about the whole thing made me realize that maybe I was just exaggerating about the whole thing. I grinned for the first time since the incident.

" I guess it is pretty funny…" I said as I observed Caroline wiping tears from her eyes.

"Don't worry about it Elena, Damon needed that. Maybe fun stuff like that are gonna make him normal again." She said it as a joke but I could hear the hidden meaning. I wondered why he wasn't normal anymore – apart from the dead wife and all.

"I'm sure he won't mind so you don't have to be upset about the whole thing. It's not like he's gonna fire you for that. He might behave like a big-headed ape sometimes but he's actually sweet and harmless. By the way, tell me, did he even laugh about it?"

" I don't know.. I kind of panicked and fled." Caroline's expression turned sympathetic. She put one hand on mine and squeezed it.

"I probably would've done the same thing. It's bad enough that you didn't even know where you were moving and who you were working for…but to meet your boss in such a manner. I think it's pretty scary." If only she knew how we had truly met. "Nonetheless, you didn't do anything wrong – unless you spilled the jugs on purpose." Her joke made me smile and I could feel the good mood coming back to me in an instant.

"You're right, Caroline. I'm just ashamed to go back there."

"Just apologize – one thing I learned about Damon in the past three years– he barks but he doesn't bite. Plus, there's no way someone can stay mad at you for nothing – you're just too sweet and kind. Now, come on, let's go downstairs and face the angry mob, shall we?"

* * *

Everybody was in the dining room when we arrived downstairs – Stefan, my boss and the kids; they all cheerfully greeted me as Caroline went to place John in a special high seat for toddlers. Apart from Rebekah who seemed to be caught in her own little world hating me too much to bother to even say hi. I could deal with that – I didn't really care as I was focusing my attention on Damon Salvatore who was sitting at the end of the table. He was looking at me with great curiosity as he had done the night before when we didn't know each other although I had tried to avoid his gaze until now.

I felt my cheeks burning the instant he made eye contact and got off his chair in the most graceful manner possible. I marveled at how beautiful he seemed this morning – I had to admit, last night's memories didn't do him justice at all. I took a brief look at him as a whole. He was dressed casually – even more casual than I was expecting – just a white t-shirt and some black jeans – and this time they were dry. To my surprise he didn't seem to care so much about clothes; or maybe it was just because it was a Sunday morning with the family. His hair was rumpled and all over the place but it still looked like a hair stylist had arranged it first thing in the morning. He stopped right in front of me and he didn't seem upset or angry at all. Instead he gave me a mysterious smile and started in a friendly voice.

"Shall we start over Miss Gilbert?" He politely asked.

"Yes, Sir, I would very much appreciate that." I could barely say that whole sentence without looking at his blue eyes for too long.

"My name is Damon Salvatore and I will be your employer from now on. I am a full-time actor, producer, director, you-name-it in the film industry." He jokingly said. I smiled at that - he was trying to make me feel comfortable and I appreciated that.

"I know - I realized it the moment I saw you this morning. I am Elena Gilbert - full-time nanny... and that's about it I guess." _Stupid time to make a joke, Elena.. _But he grinned at my reply and I got a bit more courage than before.

"I;m sorry for not being here yesterday to greet you, Miss Gilbert. As Stefan told you, my job in the film industry sometimes requires me to leave at unscheduled times and I never really know for sure when I'll be here."

"It wasn't a problem. I now understand the implications of your job. Thank you for the opportunity offered."

"You're very much welcome, Miss Gilbert. I hope that you will get accustomed to this household as soon as possible and I trust that you will be feeling like you're part of the family."

"Thank you for that, Sir. I hope so too. It's really nice to meet you."

" Great meeting you too, Miss Gilbert" He took me completely by surprise the moment he gently took my hand in his and kissed it. I felt goose bumps forming on the place he had touched with his lips. I was in awe by everything that he was – he seemed ten times better in reality than he used to be in the movies I had watched. The way he held my gaze after the kiss completely confused me though – it was like he couldn't believe that he had done that. I could see the regret in his eyes - he probably considered it an unprofessional gesture since he was my employer. Our eye contact was broken by Anna's sweet giggling.

"Hihi, you kissed Elena's hand! Daddy's a real gentleman, isn't he?" Everyone started laughing and Stefan cheerfully replied.

"Indeed he is quite the charmer, aren't you Damon?" Stefan though looked at Mr. Salvatore in a weird way as if he highly disapproved of something. His stare lasted for only a second but I could catch my boss angrily staring back at his brother. Everything was just for a second and then they put on their masks again.

"So, let us all have breakfast, shall we? We're already 15 minutes later than usual."

We all sat at the table, me as far away as possible from my boss, right next to John, whom I continuously fed throughout the whole meal. No one had told me to do that but I figured it was one of my chores. I listened to the conversations that started between my boss, Stefan and Caroline about the law firm they worked at. From what I understood, Stefan and Caroline were full time lawyers but I didn't understand what Mr. Salvatore had to do with any of this since he worked in the film industry. I got lost along the way in special terms used in their field and instead concentrated upon chit chatting with the children. At a certain point along the way...

"Elena" Tyler was asking me "how come you chose to move and work here? You're from New York, right?"

"Yes, you're right Tyler. I was living in New York city before I came here." Then I made a brief pause. "I guess I came to Los Angeles because there was no reason to stay in New York." Somehow I sensed that everybody had stopped talking and was carefully listening to what I was saying. I felt self conscious.

"Didn't you like the city?" Anna asked. I gave her a genuine smile.

"No, New York is a bit too much for me sometimes. But the place I lived in, The Bronx was really nice."

"And expensive…" Caroline added. "When I studied at Columbia University my parents got an apartment in The Bronx- it was absolutely ridiculous how much they could charge for an apartment."

"How come you were living there, Elena?" Stefan asked.

" Well, I didn't like the place I had in Brooklyn" I could see Caroline startled at the sound of Brooklyn as if it was a little horrible insect. "so I started working more hours a week and ended up earning enough to buy a small apartment there."

"You must have earned a fortune to afford that." Rebekah sarcastically added whilst eating her cereal. I couldn't understand why she had said that. Nonetheless, I had to answer the question somehow since everybody was staring at me.

"Not really, but I got an advance from my boss at the babysitter agency. She helped me get that apartment more easily."

"How much do you earn as a nanny anyway, Elena?" Rebekah again asked. I looked completely desolate as I got yet another hit from her. However, I was surprised to hear Mr. Salvatore stepping in in my defence.

"Well somebody woke up extra cranky this morning..." Everybody turned to stare at Mr Salvatore who had said the previous phrase in the most sarcastic way possible. Rebekah seemed to have steam coming out of her ears and nose because of it.

"What kind of a question is that, Rebekah?" his voice had turned from friendly and sweet to impatient and annoyed.

"A normal question, father. I was just curious." Her voice suddenly turned cat-like from the extra bitchy tone she had just used with me.

"You're curious about Elena's paycheck back in New York? That's funny, you never asked _me_ how much money I earn per movie. And I have to say...I earn _a lot_" I took one look at my boss and I froze as I saw him intently staring at Rebekah with a sarcastic and disapproving look on his face. The girl never replied to that. He never really got angry or raised his voice whilst talking and that I admired about him - you didn't see many fathers doing that. Most would just lash out at their children without caring what or how they said it.

"Now, if you wanna ask Elena something, ask her about something nice - like rainbows, clothes or, I don't know... her hobbies. Come on." Rebekah seemed like she would do no such thing. But nevertheless it seemed that her father was the only one whom she listened to so she unwillingly turned around towards me.

"So, Elena…what about your… family?" That was the last question I thought Rebekah would ask me about. Despite my breathlessness I pulled it together and simply acted it out.

"My family comes from Mayfield." I said whilst feeding John another bit of his food. I tried to stay detached.

"Sorry, where is that exactly, Elena?" Stefan asked with interest. I internally cringed as I knew it was going to turn into a long conversation.

"Georgia." I said trying to send the message that I didn't wanna talk about it anymore.

"Oh… I never heard of Mayfield." Mr Salvatore commented as if he wanted to change the subject. I looked up at him and he seemed completely detached - he was either acting or simply didn't have a clue. I was probably imagining things...

"I don't think you ever had a reason to, Mr Salvaore – it's a small village of about 1000 people. Not really much happening there." I said in my most boring tone possible.

"Do your parents still live there?" Stefan asked. I felt my throat constricting. I swallowed hard and quickly, hoping nobody noticed. I knew I couldn't do anything to stop it without raising more questions.

"Yes, they still do." I smiled pretending nothing was wrong. Inside I was panicking.

"Do you have any siblings?" Caroline asked trying to continue the conversation. I felt my throat constricting some more. _Oh no, not here and not now…_ I struggled to continue talking. I started getting equally angry that nobody got a hint that I didn't want to talk about it.

"A younger brother." I prayed to God that they would stop. I had to fight the wheezing that would start any second now.

"What's his name?" Rebekah asked trying to be daddy's good girl but she only made it even harder for me to breath. I took a firm grip of the inside of my chair.

"Jeremy." I barely whispered. I couldn't contain it any longer. I felt it building. I had to get out of there that instant.

"Please excuse me." I said, got up and left without looking back. God knows how I managed to get up those stairs without passing out.

I could feel my chest hurting whilst I struggled to keep breathing properly. I slammed the door to my room open and it became even worse because of the effort. I made myself go further towards my bed stand and I tried opening the drawer. I felt the drawer opening but I couldn't stand anymore and fell instantly to the floor in a horrible attempt to keep breathing. I felt my chest go up and down worse than ever and I cursed myself for not taking the inhaler with me in my pocket in the first place. I just never imagined that something like that would ever happen here.

I couldn't get up and I started crying as I couldn't move anymore because of the pain. It was as if someone had sewed my throat – less and less air was going in and I couldn't contain my desperation any longer. I could literally hear my heart beating in my ears.

Out of nowhere I caught a glimpse of Mr. Salvatore standing on the hallway – and then running into my room – looking at me with a a panicked face – scooping me up in his arms – then putting me on the bed – taking something from the drawer – and then… putting the inhaler in my mouth and closing my lips around it with his other hand.

"**Breathe** Elena!" he demanded. I did as he said. It didn't feel any better. I felt tears coming down even more. He looked straight in my eyes as he spoke.

"I know it hurts. But please **focus** and breathe again." I breathed again.

"**Again**, Elena!" I kept on breathing as he said and at a certain point I could hold the inhaler myself. I felt relief wash over me as my chest started feeling better and more relieved after each breath I took. Damon never left my side holding my head on his lap and examining me carefully as I breathed again and again. At a certain point I felt him caressing my hair and wiping my tears away from my cheeks. I would have normally felt weird and awkward about this whole thing but I couldn't care less about anything right after such a bad asthma attack.

After a minute or so I put the inhaler away and struggled to regain my normal heartbeat. All of my body was trembling and I felt as if I had had a rope around my throat keeping me from breathing. I looked down as I felt my hand frozen in the same position for ages - I had been holding my boss's hand, gripping on it until I made it the red colour it now was. I felt so ashamed about it when I finally looked up to see his face. There was no anger on his beautiful features though - no panic either. Instead he seemed genuinely worried about me. I hated when this happened - it made me so weak. He seemed to know though - he seemed to know so well and I couldn't help but wonder why. He finally spoke after letting me slowly recover from the shock.

"How are you feeling?" Mr Salvatore gently asked me. I slowly got up from his lap and sat on the bed next to him. I turned to him and gratefully said.

"I'm fine now." He was staring at me again.

"Good... You really scared me Miss Gilbert." The way he said it...made me feel guilty for making him so worried.

"I'm sorry about that Sir." He looked at me as if I was a lunatic.

"You're apologizing for having an asthma attack?" It did sound pretty crazy - even to me.

"I guess I am..."

"You have nothing to apologize for. I'm relieved that you're feeling better." He shot me an irresistible smile and I timidly smiled back.

"How did you know how to help me?"

"I didn't. My first reaction when I saw you was to call an ambulance but then I heard the wheezing sound coming from your throat and I realized it was asthma." That made sense - but I was confused. Most people would have just panicked.

"Few people apart from the ones suffering from asthma really recognize that wheezing sound." I said expectantly. He understood what I was actually asking.

"I don't suffer from asthma - neither do my children. It was just pure luck I guess." I didn't buy that but I left it like that. I saw him get off my bed as if he suddenly realized how inappropriate this all was.

"Thank you for that, Mr. Salvatore. You saved my life." I didn't plan on being melodramatic but it was true. I had had enough asthma attacks in my life to know that I would have died if he hadn't come in the room at the right moment.

"You're **very** welcome, Miss Gilbert. I still need a nanny around the house. Plus, who would spill jugs full of water on me if you died?" his grim joke made me grin in spite of myself. He turned serious though.

"Do you think you need to go to the doctor's after all that? I can have Elijah drop you off in an instant if you need it." He was very thoughtful as well from what I could gather.

"I don't think it's urgent. I've had it before. Maybe if I don't feel better in a while..." He seemed to disapprove but didn't even try to question my decision.

"Very well, I'll leave you to rest for a while then. Don't worry about the kids, Sundays are usually family days so you'll probably be finding us in the backyard playing charades. I want to have a chat with you later in private but it can wait. Until you feel better... If you need anything, just call one of us." He had said it mechanically but I could tell that he cared. I shoved that thought in the back of my head thinking that I would've done the same thing for him.

"Thank you so much, Sir..." He simply nodded as a response and headed towards the door. Somehow though he stopped before exiting the room and turned around to face me. His expression had changed from serious to upset. But he was definitely not upset because of me.

"My wife used to have very bad asthma attacks." He stated in a flat voice trying to hide his true feelings. I felt my mouth open in shock as I didn't know what to reply to that.

"That is how I know all about it." He explained. I felt so sorry for him. Just by those two phrases I could tell how much sorrow was in his heart.

"I…I'm sorry about…asking, Sir. I shouldn't have..." I didn't know what to say. He turned around and gave me a nostalgic smile.

"Don't be sorry, Miss Gilbert. She's the reason why you're still alive..." He paused looking in the distance as if he could see her next to him in that instant. There were so many things in his eyes, that I couldn't make sense of his feelings. With that he quickly but quietly made his way out of my room closing the door behind him...

...and leaving me with so much sorrow and pity in my heart. Not for what I had just experienced, but for his bleeding heart...

* * *

**_I apologize for having so many discussions and bits that didn't contain Delena in them. I will try and make them shorter and shorter in subsequent chapters. I'm really curious to see what you thought of Chapter 7! Until next time, take care! (: Can't wait for your comments/reviews..._**


	8. Chapter 8 Clocks

_**Author's note: Again, I would like to thank all of my readers for their incredible support shown when it comes to my story. I couldn't do it without you guys! Regarding my story, I'm sure that you're expecting long chapters with a lot more dialogue. That is exactly what I am going to give – much more dialogue since I've kind of introduced most of the main characters in this story. Plus, I want to get things rolling. I have so many ideas but I'm a bit confused which would be better and which wouldn't be. **_

_**Also, I have decided to include small spaces before chapters so that I get the chance to answer all of your questions that have been posted in the reviews section.**_

**Dark-Supernatural-Angel**_**, the asthma attacks that Elena suffered were because of the questions regarding her family. In earnest, I haven't decided yet upon what exactly happened with Elena's family –I have a vague idea at the moment. It's weird but even if I sometimes plan something for the story, it ends up being altered all the time. So I'm just gonna wait until the actual moment when this is revealed in the story to decide what really happened there in her past.**_

_**Also, you asked me whether Elena's POV will be the only one in my story. It was funny to read because I was thinking about writing this chapter from Damon's POV. Which in the end I actually did. I don't know how many chapters will be from Damon's POV but I do plan on voicing his thoughts as well.**_

_**Nonetheless, I hope you will all enjoy Chapter 8! The title's chapter is inspired by Coldplay's song – Clocks.**_

* * *

**CHAPTER 8 - CLOCKS**

* * *

DAMON's POV

_*Flashback*_

_May 2010_

_I suddenly opened my eyes widely and realized with surprise that I had fallen asleep in my office. I could tell by the darkness coming from outside. I could barely see the Ocean in the distance. I rubbed my eyes feverishly remembering about my problems. __**Our**__ problems…_

_I got up from my desk and went to stand next to the window. As I watched the beach and the night sky, I wished there was something I could do about Katherine. I briefly remembered her last asthma attack – it had been horrific to watch, let alone live. She was getting more and more panicked and stressed as each day passed and I didn't know how to deal with it anymore._

_I was beginning to think it wasn't her fault – that it was mine. That, somehow, I wasn't the best a husband or father should be. That I didn't spend enough time with my family. "You don't care anymore, Damon… You only care about your career." She had told me during on of our bad fights, right before her asthma attack. _

"_How come you're the one who gets to leave and live his life? You think I wanted to be a housewife? I didn't have a choice and you know it. So I chose to stay home and raise our children while you went on and became a well-known and respected actor." It hurt me to remember what she had said – what she always said._

"_I don't hate you for it, Damon… I know that's who you are. And that's what makes you happy. I just wish I could bring you the same happiness that your job does. The kids and me - we're not enough for you and that hurts me deeply." She did bring me happiness. She just never realized how much I loved her – I had always loved her – since the first time I had laid eyes on her alluring face. _

_I had to stop thinking about these things. What I needed to do was to take action – rapidly. Otherwise I would end up losing her. I felt it. I admit that I had never been the most loyal of husbands. I had cheated on her a number of times with fellow colleagues, random women I picked up in bars, even with my producer once. _

_It wasn't because I didn't love her. It was just because I was away from her for so damn long. It was because of fame and having so many women knocking on my door all the time. It was because every time I came home after finishing a movie she would lash out, start crying and yelling that I cheated on her, that she always knew that I didn't care about her feelings. And I didn't – I never cheated on her in our first six years of marriage. But Katherine was weak and believed everything gossip magazines wrote about me. She lived in fear that I would dump her and that she would end up on the streets since she had no job. She was blinded and could never see how much I truly loved her._

_I kept quiet and hoped that one day she would understand that I truly loved her and that I wouldn't do something like that. But at a certain point after she had rejected me so many times I turned my back on her and cheated – like there was no tomorrow. Instead of being loyal and loving her the way she deserved I betrayed her multiple times. Instead of being next to her when she needed me I was out screwing some sexy red head. In the end, I had given up on her._

_I put my head in my hands as I remembered every bad thing that I had done to her. Piece by piece I had taken my marriage and shred it to tiny pieces. Without even caring what I lost... Without even caring about my poor children… who never really knew what it was like to have a father. _

_I was interrupted by a timid knock on the door. It was her – I could feel it. _

"_Come in!" As the door opened Katherine quietly came in and closed the door behind her. She staid there, not knowing whether to come closer or not. That was the stage that our marriage had reached. _

"_Damon…" As she said my name, I could hear tears gathering in her eyes. That used to happen quite a lot lately. I went to her and took her face in my hands. Her green eyes looked back at me expectantly and I could see every ounce of the love they carried for me. I took her long blonde locks and placed them behind her ears. I had forgotten what a beautiful wife I had. My heart ached even more because of what I had done to her._

"_I love you, Katherine!" I stated. She kept crying as she heard the words come out of my mouth._

"_I love you too…" she weakly said. _

"_I'm sorry – for everything that I've done to you. For not being home with you and the kids – for not being there for you when you needed me the most… I never wanted to hurt you Kathy! You've always been the one that I love. You've been a loyal and supportive wife and I never treated you the way you deserved to be treated…"_

"_Damon, I …" I could see her shivering as I said the words. She looked guilty for some reason. I realized that she wanted to make me stop – she always did that. She always took the blame on her. I wouldn't let her this time. I put my index finger on her mouth to stop her from going on._

"_No…don't! It's ok, I know I'm the one to blame for what our marriage has become." I saw her shaking her head feverishly – she disagreed with me. I went on ignoring her desire to make me feel better. _

"_But I promise you, Kathy, I won't do that again. I'll be here for you from now on… Whatever you want, I will do. I want to save this marriage – make it work." She suddenly stopped and looked at me differently from before. It was like she just realized what kind of a person I was. She hugged me tightly for a few seconds and then released herself from my embrace._

"_I need you to sign these papers, Damon." I realized she had carried them in her hands. I knew what those were. Application for adoption. I remember being against it so badly. Telling her that two children were enough of a hassle to go on and adopt more. But she had told me that she needed this desperately, that is was vital for her. Although I never understood, I chose to give her what she wanted._

"_Are you sure that this is what you want?" I asked her one more time. She had a serious expression on her face as she replied._

"_I need it Damon. I don't know why – but I **need** this. **We** need to start over somehow. And I believe that this is the way to do it. Apart from bringing some more joy in our lives, we'll be offering two more souls a chance to be happy and grow up in a loving family. We **need** it, Damon…" I took the papers from her hands and took a look at the pictures of the children we were going to adopt. I felt unsure about it, but from the look on my wife's face I knew I would save ourselves if I did this. _

"_What do you want their names to be?" Her whole face lit up as she heard my question. She was sure I wasn't going to do it. She came close to me as she used to when we first started dating and snuggled in my arms as we were both admiring our future children._

"_I was thinking of John for the boy… But I don't know about the girl…" _

"_Why don't we name her Anna, after your mother?" My heart filled with happiness as I saw Katherine's shocked and loving expression. _

"_I would love that… Look at them, Damon. They're going to be our children." I could hear the excitement and love in her voice._

"_I'm going to take my job back at the law firm." I suddenly said. Katherine turned around, looking as if she was questioning my mental sanity. _

"_I am. I'll give up my career as an actor." I knew it was the only way to lead a normal life next to my wife._

"_Damon, you can't. You're an Oscar nominee for Christ's sake. You're one the best at what you do…"_

"_I may be good – but that's because I spend a lot of time and energy doing it. I want to take that time and energy and put it into our family." Katherine was dumbstruck. _

"_I promised you that I would fight for us, Kathy… Well, this is me fighting." With that I took my wife in my arms and kissed her – more passionately than I had ever done. In every kiss I gave her that night I realized that I still loved her as the first time I told her those three special words…_

* * *

May 2012

The sounds coming from the ocean woke me up from my day dreaming. I furiously threw away the cell phone that was ringing not even bothering to pick up or see who it was. I didn't care – it wasn't more important than what I had just experienced. I felt like I could break something because of my growing anger. I had told myself multiple times that I was not allowed to remember, think of or even utter the word _Katherine_. She had been my wife – but now she was gone and there was no bringing her back. She needed to stay in the past and I was doing everything in my powers to do that.

But Elena had brought back everything the previous night on the beach and this morning when she had had her violent asthma attack. I put my head in my hands and sighed. Why was this happening to me? Out of all the people in the United States, I had chosen the one that resembled my wife in looks. Someone was probably cursing me – maybe it was Katherine herself on the other side, not being satisfied with how much sorrow she had brought me the time we had spent together.

I went to stand next to the window and I was startled to see Elena of all people outside on the beach with Tyler and Anna. For a second I was afraid that they would see me but then I realized they couldn't. They were too busy playing around. Elena was wearing a knee-length white dress and had her hair tied up in a ponytail. She was running around the beach probably playing tag with Anna and Tyler who seemed so happy to be out and have fun with somebody for a change. I couldn't help but notice that she was still a child – the way she jumped, ran, laughed. Once in a while she would catch Anna and start tickling her and my daughter would uncontrollably giggle whilst Tyler joined in and tickled Elena.

The whole scene was mesmerizing. It was almost like Elena was their older sister. She seemed to fit in perfectly well with my children – all except Rebekah. I felt my eyes closing the moment Rebekah's face appeared in front of my face. She was such a difficult person – just like Katherine… I glanced at Elena again and pitied her for having to deal with Rebekah – Jenna had told me about how she had treated Elena when they met. I was going to have a serious talk to my daughter – she may have treated her mother badly and all of the other nannies as well, but I wasn't going to allow her to treat Elena badly. There was something about Elena – something special.

A knock on the door pulled me out of my reverie. I wasn't in the mood for anyone but I didn't really have a choice.

"Come in!" I unwillingly shouted whilst still staring at my happy children playing on the beach. The door opened and then closed and I could hear my brother's voice.

"Damon…" he said asking for my attention. I turned around and felt my voice come out in a playful and mocking tone.

"Hello, brother!" I said and instantly got in a good mood. Then I took one look at his face.

"Well, you look pooped." He did not seem to appreciate my comment but ignored it completely.

"We need to talk, Damon…" Stefan seriously said. I turned around and started walking towards my desk. I had expected this since this morning when I kissed Elena's hand in front of everybody.

"I **would** ask you what you want to talk about. However, I'm fairly certain that your answer can be summed up into one little word – Elena" I couldn't help my tone – even **I** could hear how sarcastic I sounded.

"Are you done?" Stefan asked in a tensed voice, already getting pissed off by my attitude. Well, that was a world record - getting my little bro' annoyed in less than a minute.

"Not really, but it's your turn now… I'll let it slip this time since I'm in a good mood." I saw my brother suddenly crossing his arms as if he was the older one.

"You're unbelievable, Damon… How could you bring **Elena** of all people into this house?" I slowly sat in my chair as I replied. _Here we go! _I thought.

"Well, as you can recall brother, I needed a nanny for the kids. And she was the person that seemed best for the job." Stefan smiled and shook his head.

"And didn't you think for a second that her looks would be the reason for you choosing her in the first place?" He asked in a defiant tone.

"I had no idea what she looked like." I seriously said.

"I don't buy that. Not for a second." Stefan seemed unshakeable.

"I didn't – they're not allowed to give out pictures of their employees. That's the truth but it **is** your choice not to believe it."

"Damon, she looks like **Katherine**!" Stefan had just exploded. I had to admit, apart from their hair and eyes, Elena and Kathy really looked alike.

"I am well aware of that Stefan." Something in my brother's eyes changed and I could sense he switched into war mode.

"Is it **working**, Damon? Having Elena next to you – does it make you feel **alive** again?" He was staring into my eyes. He wasn't playing a fair game.

"She is **NOT **Katherine!" I said getting up from my chair and looking back at my little brother in a defiant manner. I regretted my move - he had gotten to me.

"Let's hope not. We both know how that ended." I felt like punching Stefan in the face. He was crossing an invisible line. I stopped myself there – we had had ugly fights before. I wasn't gonna let that happen again.

"What I have planned for Elena is none of your concern…" I calmly replied. I didn't mean it but I was doing it on purpose to piss him off.

"You know, it's all fun and games, Damon, but whomever you get involved with, you end up hurting." Now **that** had struck home base. It was like he was blaming me for Katherine's death.

"I'm afraid you have no say in what I do or don't do with my life, Stefan…" he knew I was right. In the end, he never could stop me from getting what I wanted.

"You just **can't** drag Elena into all of this mess – I won't allow it." He was really passionate about this whole thing – like he always was in court with all his cases.

"I'll take that as an invitation…" I wasn't thinking straight when I said those words but I was surprised to see that Stefan had fallen into my trap.

"Just **stay away** from Elena!" He was begging me – I could see it in his eyes. I pitied him – although he would never admit it, Stefan would never fall out of love with Katherine. That's why he felt this way about Elena - it wasn't because he didn't like Elena. He wanted to see her gone because she reminded him so much of Katherine - the woman he had loved and lost...

"I **am** staying away from Elena – do you **see** me getting involved with her or anything?" I was very serious about that. I had no plans do go after Elena.

"Damon, please! After all these years can't we just give it a rest?" I sighed as I heard his words. I felt that it had been too long of a fight with him all these years since I had married Katherine.

"I don't get why you're fussing about it so much. What is it, are you afraid that we're doomed to repeat the past?" I said, getting pissed at only the idea of history repeating itself.

"Please, Damon, if you ever cared about Katherine, do it for her! Or do it for me – your brother… who deeply cares about you and your children… don't let Elena become your new Katherine. You know that's not right, brother…" He said, this time in a loving voice. I couldn't answer right away.

"I can't send her away, Stefan…" I sincerely said and felt my voice breaking. He seemed genuinely surprised by my answer.

"Why is that Damon?" He was looking at me with worry plastered on his face.

"Because she's good for them all – even for Rebekah…" I said whilst looking out the window at Elena, Anna and Tyler.

"You know Rebekah hates her because she resembles her mother…" I could hear sorrow in my brother's voice.

"Yes, and I **will** take care of that. All in due time…" I involuntarily put my head in my hands before I continued.

"You don't get it, Stefan… The kids need Elena – I mean, look at them!" I said pointing towards the angelic scene outside. My brother looked for a moment and then turned around to face me with furrowed brows present on his expression. He seemed almost in pain - he was remembering everything that had happened with Katherine. I couldn't blame him for trying to make me send Elena back to New York.

"You need her as well, don't you?" Stefan asked in such a gentle tone it was barely a whisper.

"I don't know if I need her but I will tell you one thing, Stefan…" I said as I got up from my chair.

"Elena is a very special girl… that I can say with certainty." By that time I had reached the window...

"And… I just can't let her go…" ...and was admiring the beautiful angel dancing outside on the beach.

She seemed to have no worries at all. She was in her own world full of butterflies, rainbows and dreams. She had been through too many in her life to deserve anything bad to happen to her again. Seeing her like that in that afternoon made something inside me come to life - something that had been asleep long before my wife had died. I felt such an urgent need to keep her happy and safe... That's when I realised that the thing that had been holding me back for so long wasn't my failed marriage or my wife's death.

It was not having Elena in my life...

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**_ I apologize for not making this chapter long enough - I simply couldn't wait to upload this bit. I can't wait to hear your thoughts on it. Until next time :) _**


	9. Chapter 9 Rolling in the deep

_**Author's note: I want to start by deeply apologizing for the long wait! I'm really sorry about that guys. I've been busy but the main reason for not updating my story has been the complete lack of inspiration… It started after posting chapter 8 but now I'm getting back on track.**_

_**Regarding the Guest who commented on my last Chapter that Katherine didn't look enough like Elena since they had different eyes and hair, well... the only thing I can say is that a complete clone wouldn't have been believable at all which is why I made Katherine different from Elena in that respect. Please note that I never said they were identical - just that Elena resembled Damon's dead wife. I'll explain some more in Chapter 10.  
**_

_**I hope you like Chapter 9 – I haven't made it a long one, but I plan on updating sooner, writing more chapters this way. This chapter's name was inspired by Adele's beautiful song – Rolling in the deep. Enjoy!**_

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**CHAPTER 9 – ROLLING IN THE DEEP**

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**ELENA's POV**

"You're it!" Anna shouted as loudly as possible whilst running away from me.

"Not if I run after you, little kitten!" I replied with a big grin plastered on my face.

"You'll have to catch me first!" Anna said.

"Run, Anna, run!" Tyler cheered as if it were a competition.

"Oh, no, you don't!" I shouted and quickly made my way towards Anna. She was giggling and shouting uncontrollably since she could sense I was getting closer. The moment I snatched her off the sand and into my arms she screamed so loudly that my ears started hurting. It wasn't a genuine shout of course – it was just a happy "I got caught" shout.

"Noooo!" Anna cheerfully said.

"Oh, yes I did – I caught you! Just like I promised…" I whispered in her ear as I took her back to where Tyler was standing.

"Elena. Can we go swimming now?" Anna asked looking at the ocean behind me.

"Ummm, I don't know sweetie."

"Please, Elena. We never go swimming in the ocean." Tyler said.

I turned and looked at the ocean which was full of waves because of the wind. It seemed perfect to me – the temperature was above 30 degrees, there weren't any other people around and the kids were full of energy and ready to go have a big long bath. If it were my choice I would say yes immediately. However, I had to remind myself that they weren't my own kids so I had no power over them. I would have to check with Mr. Salvatore first.

"Come on, Elena. Nothing's gonna happen. I can swim quite well. And, well… Anna is learning at the moment." Tyler said as he could see me being undecided. I didn't know what to answer.

"We're not going, are we?" Anna asked and I could see the little pout on her face forming.

"I'd love to go with you both, kids. But I have to check with your father first. I've never gone swimming here so I don't know what it's like." Both their expressions instantly fell and I really felt sorry for them.

"Daddy never lets us go swimming in the ocean…" Anna barely said. I felt my voice come out very mild.

"Look, I'll just have a chat with him and see if I can change his mind."

"Yeah, good luck with that…" Tyler said in a very weird tone. I realized that he didn't think I could pull it off.

"Hey, don't worry Tyler. I'll try…" Before he could reply we heard Elijah's voice. I saw him in an instant, leisurely coming down towards the beach from the house.

"Good afternoon Miss Elena! Kids…" he politely greeted me as always. I couldn't help but smile at hearing his friendly tone.

"Good afternoon to you too, Elijah! How are you today?"

"Oh, not too bad, Miss." I could see him in some sort of pain though . It took me a second before I realized he was wearing a short sleeved shirt and long black trousers. He seemed very uncomfortable because of the heat.

"Thank you for asking." But he never seemed bothered by his outfit. He wore it with dignity and obedience. I looked down at my dress – it wasn't indecent or anything but maybe I should have been wearing more formal clothes as well. In the end, I was just an employee in this house just like Elijah.

"Elijah! I've missed you…" Anna said and ran from my arms to Elijah's. He received her in his arms with a big smile on his face and kissed her on the forehead quite lovingly. He seemed such a family man. I wondered whether he was married.

"I've missed you both as well, kidlings." Elijah caressed Tyler's hair and embraced a giggling Anna even more as he said that.

"Can we go play chess please Elijah?" Tyler asked him surprising me at the same time.

"Of course we can, Tyler. A bit later though. Your father has asked me to take Miss Elena to his office. He needs to speak with her in private." That piece of information surprised me even more. But then I remembered my boss telling me the same thing earlier this morning and my muscles de-tensed immediately.

"Oh, well… then… I'd better make my way to Mr. Salvatore's office. I bet he wouldn't want to be kept waiting."

"You're right there, Elena…" Tyler said in a knowing voice. I started wondering why he seemed so sad when he said such things about his dad. He didn't seem a bad father at all.

As we made our way to the house Anna started debating with Elijah upon the amount of candy allowed on a Sunday afternoon. I couldn't think of anything apart from my talk with Mr. Salvatore. Would it be awkward or down-right embarrassing after what had happened that morning? I had no idea but hoped for the best. When we arrived in the hallway, the kids ran to the playroom and Elijah took me to Mr. Salvatore's office.

"Are you feeling alright, Miss Elena?" Elijah asked, his eyebrows furrowed. _How could he tell that I was nervous? I was faking so much. Clearly not well enough though._

" I'm…" I didn't feel like he deserved to be lied to. "… just a bit nervous, that's all."

"About what if I may ask?"

"Mr. Salvatore." It was such a simple and honest answer. When I met his eyes I could see something that helped me a lot – Elijah understood me.

"You'll get better, Elena… with everything. Don't worry about it now. It's perfectly normal for things to be complicated in the beginning. You'll get used to all of it – the new environment, Rebekah…" and he gave me a very knowing smile "… and even Mr. Salvatore." His kind words had a very soothing effect on me.

"I can't express how grateful I am to you for supporting me like this Elijah…" He simply grinned and nodded.

"The pleasure is all mine, Miss Elena…"

"I think I'm gonna go in now…" I reluctantly said.

"I wish you the best of luck!"

After Elijah left I breathed in and out a few times. I felt so nervous about going inside that room. I analyzed my feelings quickly – why was I so reluctant to going in? I couldn't find an answer – the whole morning had shaken me up too much already. I knew for sure that I was just overreacting. It was probably just the side effects of the asthma attack. I sighed and timidly knocked on the door. When I heard Mr. Salvatore shout "Come in!" I turned the door handle and put on my most convincing smile as I stepped into the office.

I was surprised to hear another voice as I went in – of a man laughing. A man who wasn't my boss… He actually sounded like he was British.

"…and then Kol spilled a pint of beer all over the brunette standing next to him. And received quite a fierceful slap in response."

I froze in my place as I saw my boss sitting at his desk, clearly entertaining a guest. He seemed to be laughing at the joke. When the man turned around to look at me his face suddenly changed from happy to genuinely surprised. He had short wavy blonde hair, the faintest sign of a beard and blue eyes. What made my blood freeze though was the way he was looking at me, examining me from head to toe. And that would've been fairly ok if it weren't for the pure hunger that I could see in his eyes – as if I were the tastiest of stakes laid right on a plate in front of him… His look creeped me to my core.

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DAMON'S POV

Elena's surprised face revealed how fragile she truly was. The rude way in which Klaus was examining her made me cringe and I felt my hands turn into angry balled fists underneath the desk.

"And who is this _lovely_ creature?" His British accent scratched my ears more than usual, especially due to his tone. The tone Klaus always used when stalking a beautiful woman – his predator voice. I felt I could kill Klaus right there and then with my bare hands. Elena was certainly NOT a creature…

"She is the children's new nanny." I could barely make my voice decent to utter those words. Elena could sense me being uncomfortable.

"I'm sorry for interrupting your meeting, Sir. Elijah just told me that you wanted to see me…" Her voice came out much more shy towards the end as she saw Klaus getting up from his chair and walking towards her.

"Nonsense, you weren't interrupting anything - just a chit-chat between old mates. My name is Klaus Michaelson; at your disposal." And with that Klaus took Elena's hand and kissed it, basically mirroring the same gesture with which I had greeted Elena earlier that day.

"Elena Gilbert. It's…nice to meet you Mr. Michaelson." She was being very polite as usual although clearly thrown back by Klaus's proximity – I could hear it in her shaky voice.

"Oh, no, please call me Klaus. And trust me, Elena, it is _my_ pleasure." I couldn't help but grab my chair even tighter than before as I tried very much not to lose my temper. I wouldn't normally react like this but Elena's fake smile was clearly asking me for help. I slowly stood up from my chair trying to sound as civil as possible.

"Miss Gilbert, will you please go and take care of John for the moment? I'm sure Jenna needs to start cooking dinner. I will call you when Klaus and I finish our talk." I said the words as soon as I could because I wasn't able to contain my growing anger any longer. Elena seemed grateful for my intervention and seized the opportunity to get out of the office a.s.a.p.

"Of course, Sir… I will see you later then. Umm…Have a nice day, Mr. Michaelson!"

"You too, _Elena_…" Klaus watched Elena walk until the door to the hallway was closed. He then took his place back in the leather seat placed in front of my desk. He started examining me very carefully.

"You have… quite a girl there, old friend." His devilish smile was clearly present.

"She's not mine, Klaus." I firmly stated – so that it would be loud and clear for him.

"COME ON, Damon! Have you even seen her?" Klaus's hungry eyes and insinuations disgusted me.

"Well, it would've been impossible not to look at Miss Gilbert at least once since I met her, wouldn't it?" My sarcasm surfaced of course. Klaus knew me very well though.

"Oh, I'm sure you've looked at her more than once, mate." It was like Klaus was trying to get dirty details out of me.

"If you say so… You clearly know what I think and do better than I do." I could see him start laughing as he could sense I clearly had nothing to do with Elena.

"Ok then. Well, if you won't have her, perhaps I could?" My eyes flickered from the ocean to Klaus's intense blue eyes. I thought he was kidding but fifteen years of being friends taught me something about Klaus – he never joked about women.

"Could you stop talking about her like she's a piece of meat?" My question actually replaced Klaus's grin with a surprised expression.

"Oh, please, Damon… Don't tell me you have _feelings_ for the girl." I didn't even flinch as I answered him in a cold manner.

"Don't be ridiculous. Of course I don't have feelings for Elena… but _she is_ a human being with feelings after all." Klaus seemed to finally understand.

"Indeed, I apologize for that… I was simply too preoccupied with her perfectly-shaped ass to …"

"One more word Klaus and I swear I'll wipe that British smile off your face…" His sarcastic voice had finally gotten to me, making me explode. He looked a bit startled but calmed down quickly.

"Oh, a touchy fellow my friend is, isn't he? Ok, fine… I'll leave the pretty New York city girl to you." He said whilst playing with the Newton's cradle on my desk.

"Not interested."

"Well then you wouldn't be upset if I asked her out?" So that's what he wanted to get to in the end. How come I didn't see it earlier? I was sure though that Elena wouldn't accept Klaus's invitation in a million years.

"Really… you have no one better to hit on? A sexy lawyer from the firm? Or one of Kol's actresses? Do you really need to bug my nanny out of all people?" I was getting tired of this.

"Well, well… We're getting sentimental now, aren't we? Tell me... Where's my old mate gone? I miss him quite much, you know…" I started shaking my head.

"He's long gone, Klaus – a marriage, a dead wife and four kids to take care of turned me into the boring Damon you now see…" I actually said this in a nostalgic way.

"You know, we haven't been to a club or proper party in the last 2 years I reckon… What do you say, let's go out – just the two of us. Have some good drinks, maybe some good girls as well." His insinuations came back again. I sometimes wondered why I was still friends with him. Probably too many memories and things happening between us to wreck the friendship.

"I don't consider that fun anymore." My party years were surely behind me.

"Come on, Damon – you can even bring Elena with. I'm sure she'd have a total blast with us." He was provoking me like he always used to.

"Stay away from her, Klaus – I mean it." My tone wasn't angry, just exasperated.

"Do I detect just an edge of possessiveness in your tone Damon?" He knew me too well for his own sake.

"Look, she's my kids' nanny. And they are all fond of her. I really think she will be good for them all. Make them happier after everything that's happened…" For the first time in the conversation Klaus seemed to have left aside all sarcasm and hypocrisy.

"You mean make _you_ happy, Damon?" I looked a lot for any sign that he was mocking me but he seemed to truly mean it. He had switched to friend mode. What was it with Stefan and now Klaus thinking that I wanted to keep Elena here for my own sake?

"If the kids are happy… then I'll be happy as well."

"Kathy's death really affected them badly, didn't it?" His voice had a lot of sorrow in it. He had known Katherine very well.

"It has, mate… And I can't seem to make them happy on my own. Not the way Elena seems to be doing…"

"Damon… leaving all jokes aside now... Why don't you simply use her to be happy as well? At least for a short period of time?"

"What do you even mean by that?" Klaus had the talent of confusing me quite often.

"Well… Elena is surely beautiful, pure and I'd guess single as well. She'll be around the house all the time, available to fulfill your every need…"

"Where are you going with this Michaelson?" I could feel my anger reach astronomic levels already.

"Look, just hear me out. How long has it been since you've shared a lady's company?"

"I'm not even gonna get into this with you, Klaus…" I put my head in my hands at hearing his question.

"That long, huh?" I could practically hear his smug grin – he always got me with this kind of stuff.

"It's none of your business, old _mate_…" I was getting tired of this.

"I realize it isn't. I didn't plan on finding out for my own benefit, Damon… I'm just trying to open your eyes."

"About what?" I asked clearly pissed off.

"About the possibilities you could have with Elena around the house. To relieve some of that pent-up tension, if you know what I mean."

"Oh, I know exactly what you mean, you sick twisted bastard…" My insult didn't hit home base though; this wasn't the first time I had told Klaus something like that. I felt that it wouldn't be the last time either. It was actually a usual thing for us.

"Why not do it then? At least try, Damon… It's been a while since Kathy died. You need to start getting over her somehow." That however had directly hit home base.

"Who do you think you are to tell me when I should stop mourning my wife?" My voice sounded empty even to my own ears.

"I'm your best friend, Damon… And I know that Katherine had gotten over you long before she died. You know that as well. Which is why I think it's pointless for you to still suffer so much because of her. In the end, she doesn't deserve this much consideration from you." I had no reply to that – again, he knew me so well…

"You're still an idiot for insinuating all of those things regarding Elena… Take them back."

"Fine, I take back every single word I said about you getting involved with Elena."

"Good. Because it's never gonna happen." Part of me felt that I was saying that to convince myself, not Klaus.

"Honestly, now, Damon, do you mind if I ask her out?" A deep sigh escaped from my mouth. Klaus would forever remain Klaus…

"Do whatever you want. Just… _respect her_ for God's sake man!" Klaus's grin got even bigger.

"Oh trust me, I know how to treat a lady. Especially one that I _truly_ fancy…"

Yes, indeed. Sadly enough, I knew how well he could treat a lady. All the times we went partying together or picking up girls I could see it… The pleasure he had to put his hands on a woman was immense. He would woo the girl, take her out on expensive dates and give her just as precious gifts. But in the end, after having his way with her, Klaus would throw the girl away and replace her more easily than George Clooney did. But that wasn't the problem; Klaus was very polite and nice with them overall. But the issue with Klaus was that he wanted things to go his way and his way only – and most of the time he treated his girls as rough as possible in bed and made them feel like sluts afterwards. _That_ was his problem…

"Yeah… I know just how well you can treat a lady Klaus."

I was sure that Elena would turn him down even if he did end up asking her out. She was the essence of purity and kindness – that I could tell just by looking at her. The women Klaus would usually go after were the complete opposite of Elena - superficial, blonde or red heads and sometimes even trashy. And he liked playing with them as he wished. I knew it and he knew it. But Elena didn't… Just for a split second my pulse went crazy at only the thought of Elena being touched by Klaus's slimy hands. He was my friend and I appreciated him for being there for me. But when it came to women, I highly disapproved of everything he did.

And the last person in the world whom I wished to be another one of Klaus's toys was Elena. Sweet, kind and innocent Elena…

Elena didn't deserve someone like Klaus to make her go through such a hell...

Right there and then I swore that I would never allow that to happen to Elena. No matter how good of a friend Klaus was to me.

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**_I really can't wait to see what you guys think of this chapter - please review :) ! Until next time..._**


	10. Chapter 10 Impossible

_**Author's note: Hello everybody! I kept my promise and updated as soon as I could. I'm really enthusiastic about this chapter and I hope you'll enjoy it as well! Thank you for all your reviews - I appreciate each and every one of them, they're the thing that keeps me going with this story... Ayna93, I've given a bit of thought about what you said and I had a great idea for the story because of your review. So thank you very much for that! :) This chapter's title is inspired by Shontelle's song "Impossible". I hope you'll enjoy chapter 10! **_

_**Disclaimer: Me naming some real movies and TV shows is just a temporary use in my story. I do not claim ownership on them or anything like that!  
**_

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**CHAPTER 10 – IMPOSSIBLE**

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**ELENA's POV**

I was sitting in my boss's office in the same chair where Klaus Michaelson had been a few hours ago. I was thankful that Mr. Salvatore couldn't looks me in the eye whilst preparing a drink for me at his built-in bar. For my face was expressionless. Or, as I feared, it was still filled with the repulsion I had felt towards Klaus. Even his name sent cold shivers down my spine. I couldn't get his hungry stare out of my head. I couldn't stand him for some unknown reason – he seemed arrogant, but most of all he looked like a player. The kind of man that changed women more often than his socks…

I had had my fair share of such men so if I could, I would forever stay away from them. But then again, I kept thinking that somehow I was the one who ended up unwillingly attracting them.

"Is this ok Miss Gilbert?" Mr. Salvatore asked showing me the beautiful-looking glass full of lemonade.

"Yes, thank you, Sir." I said and nodded.

"Are you sure you don't want anything a bit more…intense?" By intense he meant "with alcohol".

"No, Sir, I am completely sure. I don't drink…" He started nodding as he came back to his seat behind the desk.

"I must say, I couldn't be happier to hear that. For the sake of my children of course." He smiled his crooked smile whilst looking at me carefully. I felt as if he was examining me again. I felt my cheeks going pink.

"I can assure you that I have no such issues…" He smiled widely as he started talking.

"I'm glad we've finally managed to get together and have a proper discussion about your job, Miss Gilbert. I must say I owe you a few apologies…" His words surprised me. I briefly wondered what kind of apologies he meant.

"Firstly, I was not present when you arrived despite the amount of time I spent planning your arrival. My work is somewhat unpredictable. To briefly explain, I work both as a lawyer at my father's firm together with Stefan and Caroline but also in the film industry. I gave up on movies two years ago but remained in the domain as a producer and director." _Wow..._

"That is quite impressive Mr Salvatore…" He grinned but it was a forced and nostalgic grin.

"Thank you very much for your appreciation Miss Gilbert. But, alas, the fact that I work in two completely different domains is what makes my schedule a living hell sometimes. Not only for me but for the kids as well. Luckily, you are here now to take care of that. Nonetheless, my apologies for leaving you with my brother on the first day... I trust he explained everything around here to you?"

"Most of it. Nothing about the children since he said you were very particular about that aspect." I bit my tongue as I saw his eyebrows go up in surprise. _Should I have not said anything about that?_ But he started laughing instead.

"Ahh, Stefan. My little knight in shining armour. Indeed, I am particular about the kids… But we'll talk about that part in a minute. How are you enjoying your time in our home so far?"

"It's really nice Sir. Very different from New York City but very beautiful indeed."

"I'm happy to hear that Miss Gilbert. Coming back to my apologies… I hope you didn't feel too bad with my friend Klaus today." Oh shit, so he had noticed…

"Ummm, no, Sir. It's ok, I… am usually really nervous about meeting people the first time anyway. Ummm, you know, because first impression is very important and hard to shake afterwards…" I was babbling - pretty badly. He didn't buy my attempt.

"That is true. However, Klaus can be a bit insistent and strange with women… so feel free to treat him as you feel right if he ever behaves in an inappropriate fashion." Wow, that I hadn't expected.

"He's your friend though, Sir…" _Translation : I am obliged to be friendly to all of your guests._

"Friends or not, apart from the people that live in this house, my brother and Caroline, I must say that you have no obligation to treat anybody else the best that you can. I don't expect you to be an entertainer for my friends, Elena… As far as I see it, you are an employee but your role is to focus on my children and my children only. If you feel comfortable, you can socialize with all of us and get to know us, go out with us on diverse occasions, etc. But if you don't like somebody that visits us, don't feel obliged to endure their presence. Be polite, of course, but don't act too much for my benefit." I was dumbstruck - he was actually serious about this.

"I understand. That's very generous of you Sir." Seeing my confused expression he grinned so beautifully.

"No it isn't generosity. It's common sense. We've had quite a few nannies for my children and I've learned that you're only human beings, not robots. So I hope that's clear with you, Elena." I smiled as I heard him call me by my first name. And blushed of course...

"Crystal clear."

"Good. Last but not least, I have heard about the way my…rebellious daughter has treated you so far…" He paused looking very carefully at my reaction. I could tell he was hurt by the way Rebekah acted. I chose my words carefully trying not to express any strong emotion.

"I really don't know what to say about that Sir." I said whilst looking at my hands. He kept silent.

"I don't blame Rebekah. I saw my cousin's reaction when her aunt died – she was devastated. And I believe she was about 30 when it happened. Losing a mother isn't easy...especially when you're 11. I think that Rebekah received the hardest blow, out of all children. The others were relatively too young to fully understand. At least that's what I believe from what I've seen so far."

"You are correct when it comes to that, Miss Gilbert. I'm truly sorry to say this but... Rebekah has made our lives very hard since my wife passed away. She's improved compared to the beginning but it's been just a mild improvement – too small for you to notice anything especially since you've just met her. To be honest, I cannot find any excuse for my daughter's behaviour towards you. Mother or no mother, I think it's time she understood that life isn't that simple. You don't have to worry about dealing with her just yet. I'll have a chat with her about the whole thing, can't promise anything though – my eldest daughter is a work in progress."

"That's fine with me Sir."

"I know you must find it quite daunting – having to deal with her. But deep down she's a really good kid. I think she was just unfortunate to lose her mother at such a fragile age. I just hope you'll have the chance to see the true Rebekah in her." His voice got to me - I had no words.

"I'm sure I will…" I said and nodded as a sign of encouragement.

"Nonetheless, I apologize on her behalf. Half of the things she's going through are because of me… which is why I feel responsible for her behaviour." I wondered what he was talking about but decided to reply instead of ask anything.

"It's fine, Sir. I really don't mind. She simply took me by surprise, that's it. I'm sure we'll end up getting along. That's what I want – to be her friend. If she lets me…"

"Yes... if she lets you. Either way, I wish you the best of luck with her, Elena…Hopefully you'll manage to do something that the other 6 nannies before you didn't." _Six...nannies?_

"Now, before we start talking about your duties around the house…there's something more important." _Six nannies, yeah, Elena, you can do it where six nannies have failed before._

"I've thought about this and I decided that your salary will be $84,000 per year. That is …$7000 per month. What we have to decide together is the number of days off from work… Is…everything ok so far Miss Gilbert?" I just realized that my mouth was hanging wide open.

"Yes, Sir… I mean no! $ 7000 per month? That's simply too much Mr. Salvatore. Much more than I earned in New York…"

"Well, Miss Gilbert, you're not in New York City anymore. You're now taking care of four children, having to be with us about 48 weeks out of 52 per year. You moved all the way from the East coast to the West coast... And you're soon going to be acquainted with the true duties of an L.A. nanny, which I must say, aren't easy to accomplish. I don't think these are insignificant factors in choosing a good salary. And since I am a fair man, I believe this is the amount you deserve… Do you feel that you deserve less?" He was looking at me as if I was a bit insane.

"I think that you should decide for me. I am in no position to negotiate my salary, especially since it's already pretty good." Emphasis on the pretty good part… Who was I kidding? It was fantastic.

"Fair enough. My standards are high and you will have to live up to them. Which is why you need another type of motivation as well…"

It made sense, really. I got what he meant. What surprised me was how easily famous people would throw their money away. But then again, being a parent couldn't have been harder for them here. I heard just how many temptations and dangers were in such a society, run by fame and money. In the end, although I considered it a bit too much, I kept my mouth shut about the salary. I would have been a fool to negotiate my salary in a downward fashion anyway.

"I hope I shall live up to your standards and not disappoint you Sir."

The look Mr. Salvatore gave me right then and there made my knees weak. He smiled but not in his usual fashion – it was a friendly smile but it held much more than that. It was as if he had known me for a long, long time. His eyes locked onto mine as if he was hanging onto my words with desperation, like he wanted me to stay and not disappoint him in any way. I couldn't explain, I just saw all of those emotions dancing on his face without him being able to control them. And then, all of a sudden he snapped out of it, taking on a mask I hadn't seen in him before. His transition scared me – it was as if he had changed from Prince Charming to the Beast. When he spoke, his voice was hoarse.

"So… just to clear things out Miss Gilbert. Do you know what you want from your life at the moment?" That came completely out of the blue.

"I… don't understand." That was un understatement…

"On the beach last night you told me you didn't know what you wanted, that you had second thoughts regarding your new _dream job_." My expression had probably turned incredulous.

"Umm…" silence on my behalf. I didn't expect him to talk about the beach incident ever again. And now it came slapping me in the face. I hadn't expected that at all.

"I'm simply checking because I believe my children deserve to be in the best of hands. And I'd much rather have someone less qualified but with an _actual desire_ to work with them than someone who isn't passionate about it." _Ouch… not passionate?_

"Sir, that was a misunderstanding…" His eyes were locked onto mine in a cold way. I felt like I was under attack.

"Was it?" He doubted me – I could tell that. And it hurt deeply. Why the sudden change in attitude? I couldn't understand. My voice came out determined though.

"I want this job Sir. I admit I didn't know what it involved beforehand. But you never gave me a chance to know… You simply requested a nanny but never bothered to even give me a clue regarding what the actual situation would be like. Apart from your wife and children…" His expression told me that I should've kept my mouth shut.

"I personally believe that it was enough information given our delicate situation. But, nonetheless… Do you think 24 hours have been _enough_ for you to get an insight into what my family is like, Miss Gilbert?"

He was cornering me – and the weirdest part was that I felt like he was enjoying it. I never thought I'd witness this part of him – hell, I never even knew it existed. He must have been a pretty God-damn good lawyer. Even the snob side of him that was hiding from me on a regular basis had surfaced now.

"Yes. I believe that, in exactly 24 hours, I have seen and heard enough to know that I want to stay…and do my absolute best when it comes to your children, Mr. Salvatore. Because I truly _am _passionate about my job – I've been doing it for three years now and as Mrs. Dobbs has certainly told you, I take it very seriously. For me children are top priority, I love them and I enjoy working with them."

My reply seemed to shut him up for a split second. _Good _I thought…I heard my mouth open in the rage that had claimed me. I knew this was one of my biggest faults – short temper – but I couldn't contain it. He had made me like this. I think that;s what he wanted all along.

"And if you plan on asking me why I didn't use the verb _love_ twice in the previous sentence… that is because everybody loves to play with kids when they're loveable and cute. But nobody loves dealing with them when they're in pain or having a fit because of something they're not getting. Nonetheless, I enjoy working with children very much." He looked at me, surprised that I actually replied in that manner. But he didn't seem upset.

"Fair enough... Now, as I've seen in your CV, you had no actual training in becoming a babysitter. You simply started doing it out of the blue. How did you end up there?" I swallowed hard. All of my rage turned into a weird sense of fear and guilt.

"It's something personal that I prefer not to go into. The thing is that I dropped out of University before I even had the chance to start. Financial reasons…" I took one look at him and saw that he felt sorry to hear that. I reluctantly went on.

"But that's not important. I couldn't study Biology – which is the course I had been accepted to at Columbia University – and I quickly had to find work. Which is when Mrs. Dobbs found me and hired me… And yes you are right… I didn't get any training but I do believe that training is overrated in some cases." Now he seemed both surprised and amused.

"Training is…overrated? Really?" He smiled as he asked me that.

"When it comes to babysitting yes."

"Would you please enlighten me upon that idea?" He was being sarcastic. I gave up on the whole "bad-ass Elena". I didn't think he'd appreciate it anyway.

"I used to take care of my little brother every day when my parents were at work. For about ten years of my life… Then came so many times when our neighbours would call asking for me to babysit their kids. Despite not having training, I was requested for babysitting by neighbours in our small town. And then… another three years of actually taking care of strangers'children – well, I think that was the best training of my life. If you really put that much value on training, I will have you know that I passed a beginner's and then advanced Child's Psychology long-distance course." He hadn't expected that.

"How come you never put it on your CV?" Good question…

"It simply slipped my mind. Plus the usual clients simply ask Mrs. Dobbs for a suited nanny without caring that much about qualifications and CVs."

"Is that how things in your firm usually go?" I didn't know whether he was questioning our company or my skills.

"I have the diplomas upstairs in my room."I said in a cold manner. I was getting just a tad sick of getting tested – not like this at least.

"Or if you want, simply call Mrs. Dobbs to check." He actually grinned at me in response. I was so confused – what was wrong with this man? He had serious mood swings.

"That won't be necessary, Elena…" He said and tossed my CV on the desk, far away from where we were seated.

"Our long discussion was simply a test, Miss Gilbert. Like an interview… the interview you never had." I couldn't believe it. It made sense though.

"So…" I looked at my hands as I spoke. "… am I suitable enough for the job?"

"Miss Gilbert, you are officially hired." That crooked smile of his – he had been mocking me all along. I didn't know what to say, I was confused, angry and happy, all at the same time. I smiled.

"Congratulations." He nodded and genuinely smiled.

"Thank you Sir."

"Now… we should talk about your duties around the house." I just nodded and listened to him for the rest of the conversation. I still hadn't recovered from the surprise interview.

* * *

The first week in the Salvatore house was pretty much exhausting. I had to take care of all the kids - well apart from Rebekah I guess –in the morning, after school and in the evening as well. Waking them up, choosing clothes for Anna and John to wear, checking that their backpacks were ready and had all the books and things they needed. And the best bit about prepping them for school was their beautiful blue and black uniforms. Anna, Tyler and Rebekah all went to The Polytechnic School, a quite prestigious private institution from what Caroline had told me. The downside of it all was that they had to commute from Malibu to Pasadena, where the private school was located. Which meant that half of the day I spent alone at home with John and Jenna…

I didn't really mind though. Mr. Salvatore had instructed for me to have two hours around noon for myself when John slept – I could go out and do whatever I wanted. I ended up going to a painting class every day followed by a swim at the gym. Despite having a swimming pool on the estate, I felt weird about walking around in a swimming suit because of Elijah and my boss of course. So I chose to go to the gym instead.

The afternoon and evening were the tricky bits of the day. Everyone basically had a different schedule. I couldn't keep track of it all. From what I could remember, Anna went to ballet three times a week, John had guitar lessons and Judo, whilst Rebekah had riding and piano lessons. Fortunately for me, John didn't have to go anywhere – yet. He was the easiest to take care of really for his most basic need was potty training. I only had a few skills in Judo and piano but apart from that I couldn't help the kids with any of their activities. And on top of everything these kids had to do, there were also compulsory language lessons imposed by their father. Here's where I came in.

When my boss found out that I was fluent in Spanish and German (because of my parents) and I had studied French intensively in school, my secondary role became Language tutoring. It was quite funny actually. Every single day you would hear me talking to them in three different languages. I was patient with them, they listened and learned. Apart from Rebekah who seized every opportunity to say every German insult she knew to my face. I kind of gave up on trying with her after three horrible days. She was very hard to shake.

The kids overall were loveable and very well educated and I was genuinely happy to take care of them. I also got along with Elijah and Jenna very well which made everything easier for me. Stefan and Caroline would come and see the kids once in a while which pleased me very much because Rebekah would actually come out of her room and spend time with someone else but her homework and laptop. Mr. Salvatore wasn't very sociable from Monday to Friday. I could tell he had a lot of work to do – God knows how he managed to work at the firm and keep up his fame in the movie industry. But he seemed to manage quite well, the only problem was that he didn't have time for the kids apart from the evenings when they would play random games, watch movies or go swimming in the pool.

I studied him very closely when he was with his children. He seemed so happy with them and was a very caring father. Perhaps his only fault was that he expected quite a lot from his kids – excellent manners, the best of grades, perfect extracurricular skills. It was like he was preparing them for Ivy League Universities. I thought he was a bit too strict with the kids – I didn"t approve of that but didn't mettle at all. It wasn't until Friday evening when I realized something about Mr. Salvatore.

Anna was happily running in the backyard when she suddenly tripped over a toy and fell to the ground with a loud thud. Tears and screams came out all at once of course. Now, I was upstairs in my room when I saw this happening. Before I could even move my feet Mr. Salvatore came out of nowhere and took Anna in his arms calling for Jenna to bring him a few plasters for Anna's scratched and bleeding knees. What surprised me was the way he soothed her by hugging her, wiping the tears and caressing her hair – the distinct way in which a _mother_ would calm a child down. That's when it hit me – he had to be both a father and a mother for these children. The reason why he was so strict wasn't because he didn't want to let them free; he simply didn't want anything bad happening to them - ever.

My eyes involuntarily filled with tears at the thought of my own father. I missed him so much… I kept looking at my boss being such a loving father to his children and I felt something inside of me coming to pieces. Mr. Salvatore randomly looked up from the backyard and locked his eyes onto mine bearing a very confused look on his face. He didn't know what was wrong with me. I couldn't hold his stare or my feelings in and I turned around and fled for my bathroom locking the door behind me. That was the first time I started crying because of my father in what had been a very long time…

* * *

It was 4pm on my second Sunday in the Salvatore house. From what I had spoken with my boss, he told me that I could have Sundays free every single week when he was at home. I thought I would go out and see a bit of L.A. but not before I talked to Bonnie. I missed her so much and knew for sure that she was dying to hear about everything I'd been through in the past week. When her bright red hair and warm brown eyes surfaced from my laptop's screen I couldn't contain my happiness.

"Bonnie!"

" 'Lena pumpkin! I'm so happy to finally see you. I've missed you so much already."

"I've missed you too Bonnie. You can't even imagine what's happened so far…"

"So tell me, tell me… What's it like there in Los Angeles?"

"I don't even know how to describe it – words aren't enough. It's simply surreal…"

"Oh my God, look… I want to hear every single detail – start from the beginning will you?"

I didn't need to be asked twice. I started my long story a bit timidly then after 5 minutes I couldn't stop talking about it. Every single scene was re-enacted in front of Bonnie leaving nothing aside apart from my asthma attack. I felt sorry for not telling my best friend about that as well but somehow I felt it was too intimate to share – even with Bonnie. At the end of my story I couldn't contain my smile at all since I could see Bonnie's face going through every colour known to man. Small sounds would escape her mouth every now and then but strangely enough she never interrupted me. She simply kept listening until my story came to an end.

"Bonnie?" I asked seeing her expressionless.

"I… just can't believe it." Her face was a bit confused and surprised from what I could tell.

"Which part of it?" I asked mildly amused. Bonnie deeply huffed before she replied.

"Damon…Salvatore is your _boss_?" _Oh, __**that**__ bit…_

"Trust me… I couldn't believe it either." I said shaking my head.

"By the look on your face, you _still _can't believe it." Oh, she knew me so well…

"I don't know if I'll _ever _get used to it…" And that was the truth – too good to be true.

"Can one even _do_ that? Get used to _Damon Salvatore_?" Bonnie was moving her hands very much as she spoke.

"He's not God, Bonnie…" A smile escaped my lips though.

"He might not be God Almighty… but by the way he looks, he most certainly is a GOD!" My smile turned into a grin and I involuntarily blushed – I had thought the same thing that night on the beach.

"Oh, Bonnie…" I giggled uncontrollably.

"Elena, are you crazy honey?"

"Last time I checked I wasn't… Why?" I couldn't stop my giggle.

"You're living under the same roof with Damon Salvatore! DAMON SALVATORE!"

"Yeah, Bonnie, I know that…"

"I mean…do you even know how much he's accomplished?"

"No, but I'm sure you'll fill me in sooner than…"

"Voted sexiest actor alive three years in a row…" Bonnie had just started her impossibly long rant.

"Besides being an actor he's also a producer, director and a lawyer…?" I could tell she was reading off Wikipedia.

"Yeah, I knew about the law firm…"

"…He starred in so many movies having leading roles in romantic comedies such as "The proposal" "When in Rome", "Fool's gold", "What happens in Vegas", "The notebook", "_Pearl Harbor"…"_

_Oh yes, Bonnie was indeed on a roll…_

"…and brief appearances in TV shows such as "Sex and the City", "Grey's Anatomy" and "Lost"…."

"Wow…" I couldn't help but say that as I heard all of those names being recited by a very enthusiastic Bonnie.

"He also won a lot of small prizes but no major nomination. Still he's quite a name in the film industry."

"That's no surprise for me… You should see his estate." I said sighing.

"Is it that huge and fabulous as the ones we see in magazines?" Bonnie's eyes had become as big as onions as she was so fascinated about my new life. Upon seeing my nod Bonnie got really upset and simply replied:

"I hate you, Elena Gilbert…" My grin got bigger and I felt it was the perfect time to tease her a bit.

"Well it gets better…"

"Better? Is that even possible when having such a gorgeous estate?" I could tell she was looking at a picture on the internet.

"Yes it does… He lives in Malibu Beach for God's sake! You should see this place, Bonnie. So different from New York City… You should see the parties these people hold in their mansions – I've just witnessed them from the beach but still, it's really classy around here."

"Oh God…" Bonnie sighed seeming very sad.

"What's wrong?"

"You're gonna randomly meet Leo DiCaprio in the neighbourhood, helplessly fall in love with him and get married sooner than George is ever gonna ask me to marry him…" I burst out with laughter.

"Come on, Bonnie, be serious… There's no way that would _ever_ happen. Leo Di Caprio falling in love with me? I bet he wouldn't even turn his head to look me in the eye, let alone put a ring on my finger." Bonnie sighed as if my life was suddenly the saddest thing ever since Di Caprio would never be my husband.

"Well, at least you have such a successful boss… Damon Salvatore – such a **hottie**." I remembered all of the times Bonnie and I had watched movies together. We would giggle and shout every time a sexy actor made his appearance on the TV screen. We would even, I'm ashamed to say it, rate them as well – on a scale from 0 to 10.

"How much would you give him?" I couldn't believe I had just asked her that. He was my BOSS for God's sake! I should be respecting him, not scoring him. But in the end, he couldn't hear and my devilish side got the best of me.

"Elena Gilbert, you're on fire tonight!" I blushed at the comment.

"Well, I'm definitely not mentally sane… That's for sure."

"I LOVE it… You're never like this – L.A. has changed you already."

"I doubt it… but, tell me… How much would you give Damon Salvatore?"

"Well…" Bonnie started reluctantly. And then I could tell she was admiring a photo of him, sizing him up like he was a painting at an auction event.

"Messy-like hair… six-pack muscles…looks just so damn-good in a suit…sexy crooked smile…and those EYES Elena! Oh my god, I think my heart just skipped a beat…"

I knew what she meant. Seeing Damon Salvatore's eyes in a photo on the internet was a treat for the female eye to be completely honest. But getting to actually stare into those gorgeous blue eyes in real life was enough to make my pulse go crazy. The difference between a picture and real life wasn't fair for females around the world. Because Damon Salvatore was simply… a God, just the way Bonnie had described him.

"Elena… as my best friend, you have the duty to tell me just how incredible those blue eyes are in real life! No matter how strong you feel about your moral duties to be a decent person."

"Bonnie, he's my boss…"

"Come on, Elena… You **cannot** leave me hanging like this!" In her fake grieving, Bonnie looked exactly like a little kid that I had to deal with. That made me smile.

"Never in our lives have we lived something as impressive and exciting as what you are now living. Just leave aside your constricting morals and have a bit of fun out of it…"

"Well… I guess it wouldn't be too bad to tell you about his eyes." Bonnie's enthusiastic reaction was immediate.

"Oh yes, please! What are they like? Are they as beautiful as the photos show them?"

"The photos don't make Damon Salvatore justice… Not even close."

"So they're _that_ blue?" I giggled as I saw Bonnie being in so much awe.

"Actually, they're not really ocean blue as you might expect… Surprisingly, his eyes are grey." I said and smiled as I remembered his surreal eyes...

* * *

After another 30 minutes of being amazed by my boss, Bonnie and I had reached a consensus. We were going to be completely decent and right about him after this day. But until then we were allowed to say whatever we thought about his eyes, lips, chest, etc. It was actually fun when I could forget that he might be one storey underneath in his office. So close to me…

"Mmmm, well, he's had a lifetime of women apparently."

"Bonn, I don't know if I want to get into his personal life… That really should be in the tabu section." So far the tabu section was empty…

"Don't' worry. There's not much detail anyway…" My morals were really going down tonight.

"So… what does it say?" Curiosity got the best of me.

"He used to be the most popular guy in high-school, quarterback for the football team, voted prom king… had tones of girlfriends before he met Katherine Pierce."

"Who is Katherine Pierce?"

"She was his wife…"

"Oh my God…" I had just remembered...

"What's wrong Elena?"

"He called me... Katherine that night… The night we met on the beach."

"Wait…what?" Bonnie's eyes went wide in shock.

"Yeah, right before I turned around, he called me _Katherine_. I thought it was strange back then but I never imagined it was his wife..."

"Wow… poor guy. Mistaking a random girl with his dead wife – it sure mustn't be easy to live without her."

I had never given any thought to that since I had come into this house. It pretty much seemed like it.

"I don't think he is truly happy, you know…" Bonnie's face became sad as she heard that.

"Really?"

"No… he seems to be trying a lot for the kids but deep down I think he's miserable." I kind of felt it - although he never showed me it.

"How can you tell, Elena? You don't spend a lot of time with him, do you?"

"No, I don't. And…even if I do spend time with him and the kids, it's to take care of John who's the youngest one. But once in a while I catch him looking in the distance, his eyes empty as if... as if he's waiting for someone to come back to him…" Hearing my own words I felt my skin getting goose bumps.

"Wow… he probably imagined you were his wife…" For a certain reason that creeped me to my core…

"Well, I'm definitely not his wife." My joke was the worst ever but Bonnie still smiled to encourage me.

"It's better that you never were."

"What do you mean?"

"Well according to this piece of news, it's rumoured that Damon cheated on Katherine quite a lot. Although they never caught him with some other woman, people talk a lot on the Internet."

"Well, I was sure that he has a lot of baggage. I mean, he's a movie star – he's bound to have dated tones of women."

"Doesn't make it cool to cheat on your wife though isn't it?"

"No, it doesn't. But that's in the past now, isn't it? People can start over…" I had no idea why I had even uttered those words – they had zero relevance to the conversation.

"Don't count on that, Elena…" Bonnie's reply scared me. Did she think I hoped he would change?

"Bonnie, it's not like that…"

"Then what is it like, Elena? Hey… I get it. He's young, beautiful, sexy, intelligent… you live in the same house with him – you're bound to go a little bit crazy about him. I'd be surprised if you didn't. He's Damon Salvatore for God's sake… Women would kill to be in your position…"

"I'm in no good position. I'm his employee – his children's nanny. I can't afford to go crazy about him. Not now or ever for that matter."

"It's ok to like him though. But be careful sweetie… Don't get yourself involved in something you can't control. That wouldn't end up well."

"I'm not getting into anything with him. No way Jose…" _No way Jose_ was our special Spanish expression that basically meant_ "Absolutely positively no way_"

"Fine, honey. Just take care of yourself, ok?" Bonnie was such a loving friend.

"Of course, Bonn… you don't have to ask me."

"Good. So… do you think we've basically exhausted all discussion topics about Damon Salvatore?"

"Umm.. I think we've about covered everything on him for tonight."

"Good… because I have something to tell you."

"Shoot." I said in a very relaxed tone… I was actually glad that we weren't talking about my boss anymore.

"Well… I don't know how to tell you this in a good way. I don't think there is any way to say this properly." Panic mode – instantly.

"Ok, Bonnie… you're freaking me out. What's wrong?" She was acting very weird, couldn't look at me in the eyes properly.

"Before I tell you, I thought long and hard about whether I should even say anything. But I figured that you deserve to know."

"Bonnie just tell me." She couldn't – I could see it in her eyes, she was afraid of what I would say.

"Elena, please promise me something – don't hate me for what I did!" Panic mode was intensifying by the second.

"Why would I hate you Bonnie?" It didn't make any sense – what could she have done?

"I…damn it, I can't make myself tell you."

"Bonn, calm down… Why are you so tense about it? What the hell happened?"

"Someone came to visit me last Saturday. Right after you left for L.A." There – she had finally said it. By _someone_ I thought a complete stranger.

"Ok…so what? What did they want?" Bonnie was reluctant. I could tell.

"To find out where you were." My eyebrows furrowed.

"I don't get it… Who was it?" I was so confused about the whole thing.

"Elena…" Oh, no. I had heard that voice only a few times. Whenever something really bad had happened... I embraced myself for what came next.

"It was **Mason**…" My breathing stopped in my throat for a second. And then it came back again as quickly as it had paused.

Hearing his name had the effect of a hundred atomic bombs exploding in my head all at once. I wasn't looking at Bonnie anymore. I was literally looking through Bonnie. Or through the laptop screen… The only thing that my mouth could utter was the same thing that my head and heart were both feeling at the same time.

"No… it can't be."

* * *

_**So that was chapter 10! Please REVIEW - say your opinions, your requests, give me an idea of what you expect from the story... Until next time! :)**_


	11. Chapter 11 Dreaming of you

_**Author's note: Oh my God! I was so psyched about all your reviews, guys! I loved the interest that you all showed for my story, I'm glad you're enjoying it. Thank you for waiting for those magical Delena scenes that will start with the next chapter - I promise! I have big plans starting with the next chapter when much more intimate conversations will take place and well, I won't ruin it for you...  
**_

_**! At a certain point in the story Elena is going to get a picture of her and Mason – this is the link I want you to go to and access the picture I'm imagining of them together : fanpop "dot" "com" "slash" spots/nina-dobrev/images/15415400/title/taylor-kinney-nina-photo .**_

_**This chapter's title is inspired by The Coral's song "Dreaming of you". I hope you enjoy chapter 11!  
**_

* * *

**CHAPTER 11 – DREAMING OF YOU**

* * *

**ELENA's POV**

"I'm so sorry…" Bonnie said putting her hand over her mouth. My head was spinning…

"You're telling me that Mason came to see you Bonnie?" I couldn't believe this – it was way too weird to be true.

"Yes, he did, Elena…" Bonnie said as if she was scared to even utter the words. The more I processed her words, the less I believed it.

To clear things out, Mason had been my boyfriend in New York city. There wasn't much to say about him really – we had fallen in love about one year after I started working for Mrs. Dobbs. He was a tall beautiful man with a gorgeous body, perfect smile and blue-green eyes. I was basically smitten after five minutes of knowing him. He ended up asking me out and that was how our romance started. I knew from the beginning that he was a bit of a bad boy but after getting to know him, Mason turned out to be kind and loving. We were always together in our spare time doing all sort of crazy things. Three years older than me, he worked in Publishing and was really passionate about his job. Everything was perfect for us for one whole year.

What had gone wrong with us came solely because of his family and friends. But surprisingly, it hadn't been because of his parents. They lived in Chicago so we barely saw them. Plus that I got along very well with them despite the fact that they were superior when it came to our financial status. But Mason didn't care that I didn't have money and neither did they. All was going well, we loved each other and were starting to paint the canvas that was our future in so many bright colours that our heads were in the clouds when reality struck.

And boy, did it strike hard. Remember the story regarding the Lockwood family? Yes, well they were obviously related. Richard Lockwood, the one who had attacked me that day in his home was Mason's uncle. Long story short, when it came to blaming people, Richard and Carol told both Mrs. Dobbs and Mason that I was to blame in the whole affair. Now, the ironic bit of the story was that I could have sworn that Mrs. Dobbs wouldn't believe me whilst Mason would. Unfortunately it turned out to be the opposite. I guess the only upside of that story was that I got to keep my job at the company and ended up here in L.A. But the downside was that Mason turned his back on me, proving to be a complete jerk, and I refused to ever see him again. There was more to the whole thing but I couldn't even think of that part without feeling my heart break all over again.

And now he was knocking on Bonnie's door wanting to know where I was…

"Tell me… what happened then? Did you let him in?" I half-expected her to have slammed the door in his face.

"I was so surprised that I did let him in. But I only did that because George was there with me."

"Good." I sighed in relief. "What then?" Bonnie seemed embarrassed when she answered.

"He was the same old Mason… Saying the usual – that he was sorry he hurt you, that he loved you, wanted to make things right, etc." I fervently shook my head.

"The same old bullshit you mean…" I was angry already just by imagining him saying all of that crap.

"Yeah, pretty much that… I kicked him out though after he finished his rant and pleadings. But he did keep on asking me where you were." I flinched when I heard that.

"How did he know I wasn't in New York anymore?"

"He didn't. He had just gone to your apartment and knocked on the door for ages… And then Mrs. Stevens told him you had moved out." I felt my breathing stop again.

"Oh no… don't tell me…"

"Don't worry, I went and had a chat with her but she said she didn't even remember seeing him on the hallway. I don't know what she told him Elena. You know what that old lady's like – Coo coo. Either way, when he asked about you I didn't tell him anything! I said he could go at the agency all he wanted but he would never get anything from Mrs. Dobbs – not after everything he's done to you."

"And what did the scoundrel say?" I never usually talked like this about people but the son-of-a-bitch brought it out in me.

"He replied in his usual arrogant manner that he would find out where you were even if he had to make me tell him; which was when George stepped in and almost punched him in the face for talking to me like that." I involuntarily grinned as I heard about George defending Bonnie. He was such a good guy.

"Thank God George stepped in – it's just amazing to hear stories where Mason actually goes back to his primordial form – a coward…" It still pained me to say that about him but it was true.

"Bonnie… what am I gonna do if he finds out I'm in L.A. and comes here?"

"I don't think you should be worrying about that yet, Elena… Even if someone really stupid tells him where you are, he won't be able to find you. You're not even in downtown L.A. . You're in Malibu…"

"True… Just please make sure he won't find out from the agency…"

"Already taken care of – I told Mrs. Dobbs about the whole thing."

"Thank you so much, best friend."

"You have nothing to thank me for." I paused for a bit before I began in a gentle tone.

"You're so lucky to have George, Bonnie…"

"I know…" she replied in a gentle tone. "Elena?"

"Mmmm?"

"Don't worry, you;ll find someone special as well." It's like she knew what I was thinking. But the truth was that I had hoped so much that Mason was the one whom I'd marry that I didn't really believe that there was anybody else for me. That was one of the reasons I had left New York.

"Yeah, I surely will." I put on my best smile and changed the subject.

Later that afternoon I took out the only picture I had kept of Mason and me. We looked so normal and happy standing in his friends' kitchen that it was hard to believe our relationship had ended so brutally. God, I always thought we looked good together… I had always loved that picture but after we broke up I couldn't look at it anymore. I didn't know why I had taken it with me – my feelings for Mason were very unclear, even now. But one thing was sure; I hated him for what he had done to me. All of a sudden I found myself slowly tearing the picture to pieces whilst I cried and remembered everything he had done to me.

* * *

After dinner that evening I went outside on the patio and laid on the bench watching the sunset. I felt restless because of the whole Mason thing. I wondered when it would truly end with him… and when all of this unfinished business between us would solve itself… That was when I realized that I was being watched and suddenly sat up straight feeling quite defenseless. To my surprise, I saw Mr. Salvatore of all people leaning against the house wall, hands in his pockets and looking at me in a very amused fashion.

I couldn't help but notice how beautiful he looked in a regular T-shirt and shorts. All of those years having seen him on TV wearing fancy clothes and having make-up and hair gel on, made me consider him just another perfect and untouchable God of the movie industry. And there he was – no make-up, messy black locks or sexy actress next to him and he still looked incredibly attractive. Bonnie was right – I would end up going crazy about him. After all, he _was_ Damon Salvatore…

"I didn't mean to scare you Miss Gilbert." He said, his voice bright and happy. His playful smile made my knees go weak – good thing I wasn't standing.

"It's alright sir. I just get startled easily…" His eyebrows furrowed right above his beautiful blue-grey eyes.

"The courageous Elena Gilbert... getting startled so easily?" My eyebrows arched at hearing his question.

"What happened to the girl on fire who was putting me to shame last week at your surprise interview?" He said and walked towards me while examining me carefully. I blushed as his words sank in. After he sat down on the bench next to me I found my voice again. It was still a bit shaky since he was sitting so close to me.

"I guess practicing Judo for a few years makes you a bit paranoid for the rest of your life." Mr. Salvatore's smile faded as he heard my words. A question popped on his lips.

"Why Judo of all sports?" I was stupidly happy because he was interested in my boring life. Well, boring compared to his glamorous one…

"Well… it's a funny story really. When I was 5 apparently I was really naughty and full of energy. So my parents wanted to make me exercise and get rid of all that. They tried all sorts of activities – ballet, swimming, dancing… Nothing worked until someone suggested Judo. And I ended up loving it." His smile widened and I felt my heart beating faster. I quickly looked at my feet so that he couldn't notice.

"Well, there you go… Let me guess. You probably went and beat up all of your friends after Judo class didn't you?" I could tell he was teasing me like he always did. I blushed before I answered him seriously.

"I actually did beat my friends – but only the boys. They weren't really nice to me." His incredulous expression turned into a gentle and musical laughter. God, he was so perfect when he laughed. Every crease on his face was heavenly to watch. And the dimple on his right cheek made my stomach fill with butterflies.

"Why does that not surprise me?"

His wide grin took my eyes and I stared at his lips for just a second before I internally screamed _What are you doing? He's your boss!_ Curiously enough, I caught him staring at me in the strange way like he sometimes did. When he realized I was looking back at him he shook his head like he was denying something to himself and started in a serious tone.

"How long did you practice Judo?" Again, so stupidly happy by the curiosity in his voice.

"5 whole years… I miss it so much now – especially since I found out Tyler practices it as well."

"Yes, well, Tyler has always been courageous but a bit of an introvert. Unfortunately he used to get beaten up by his colleagues at school – they called him a whimp and were mean to him. Kids' stuff and all that… He was the one who wanted to do Judo and I couldn't say no."

"I'm sorry to hear that. He doesn't seem like one of those kids who get pushed around by others."

"Yeah, well you didn't seem the kind of person that beat up others when she was a kid, so…" His smile was intoxicating. He made me feel so comfortable; being with him was really pleasant.

"Why did you give up Judo?" His eyes turned curious again. I smiled but didn't feel bad about the following words.

"Because of asthma…" He didn't seem surprised. His voice was gentle though.

"I see… How have you been feeling since last week?"

"Better, thank you for asking, sir. No more attacks which has been a real treat." I could tell he was remembering my last asthma attack. I felt sorry for him having to take care of me then. Seeing his gloomy expression reminded me of my dad again.

"I'm really glad that you're here with us, Elena… The kids truly like you. And I used to be head-over-heels before you came to work for us."

"I'm happy that I'm needed and... liked." I smiled quite encouragingly. He seemed a bit weird about what he was about to tell me.

"Miss Gilbert, there's something I need to tell you…" My eyes turned from my feet to his face in an instant. Curiosity was written all over my face.

"Yes sir?" He seemed a bit nervous about the whole thing which made me nervous as well.

"I just got off the phone with one of my friends… who works in the movie industry. The whole thing is really last moment but… I've been offered a part in a movie."

"Oh…" Even I could hear the crushing disappointment in my voice. He seemed to linger on my eyes as he had clearly heard it as well.

"It's been extremely last minute since the actor who was supposed to have the leading role quit yesterday. I know it's a lot to ask – I never really thought I'd go back to acting but…" He was looking far away towards the ocean. There was a fire burning in his eyes which gave me goose bumps.

"…I just need to do it. I can't explain."

"I understand. You're very good at what you do, sir. I've seen many movies of yours. You should go seize this opportunity and not look back." Although it meant leaving me alone here…

"Thank you, Miss Gilbert. That means a lot coming from you." My pulse sped up just as I saw his grateful smile.

"I'll probably be gone for about two months. I heard they plan on shooting the entire movie very quickly so that they can release it at the beginning of next year. It shouldn't be too hard to cope with the kids since they have school until I should be coming back. But still, it's short notice for you as well, Miss Gilbert. You'll be alone with all four of my kids. Do you feel you're up to the challenge?"

My answer came immediately. "That's no problem for me, sir. I've been trained for this."

"That's good to hear…"

I was surprised to see my boss suddenly getting up from the bench. He turned around and offered his hand to me. I felt my cheeks burning as I was gently helped to get up as well. Mr. Salvatore seemed to ponder before he intensely looked into my eyes and asked me.

"Can I trust you to take proper care of my children while I'm away, Elena?" He was serious and made me insecure for a split second.

"Of course you can trust me." He nodded once and then left me alone in the middle of the garden, feeling incredibly sad. I couldn't believe that he would be gone for two whole months…

* * *

"Daddy! I don't want you to go!" Anna shouted in a very panicky fashion latching onto Mr. Salvatore's neck. He was pained to have to leave his young daughter.

Everyone was watching the show that was Mr. Salvatore's departure. Everything was settled – Elijah was driving him to the airport where he would take the plane to New York city and then to London. Yes, he was indeed going to England of all places for two whole months! I couldn't believe it when I had heard it from Caroline the other night. She and Stefan had come and said their goodbyes to my boss since it was too early to come this morning.

It was 4.30 a.m. I could barely keep my eyes open but somehow what I was feeling inside wasn't desperation or panic; it was emptiness that there would be no more kind boss around to guide me and take care of things when they got out of control. I was supposed to do that now. Stefan and Caroline would come by and help once in a while but they had their own lives and jobs to take care of. I didn't – this was my life and job; the kids… And I had to take care of them all by myself; well, with Jenna's help and all.

I still felt a bit nervous. And sad as well... To be completely honest, I didn't want Mr. Salvatore to go, he was my foundation that kept me glued to the ground in this house. I didn't even want to imagine what Rebekah would be like given that her father would be leaving…

My boss managed to calm Anna down and then say goodbye to John and Tyler as well. And then, seeming a bit reluctant in his gestures, Mr. Salvatore went to say goodbye to Rebekah. I could tell he was nervous about this as Rebekah was standing perfectly straight with her chin up in the air, arms crossed against her chest looking more defiant than ever. This image wasn't even funny despite the fact that you could clearly see how much of a child she was. It was downright sad to watch.

"I need to go now, puppet…" My skin filled with goose bumps as I heard the word "Puppet" affectionately coming out of Mr. Salvatore's mouth.

"Yes, I am well aware of that, father."

Everybody else had called him dad, Rebekah just had to be the one calling my boss 'father' in such a cold manner. Mr. Salvatore went stiff for a bit while looking down at his daughter. He went down on one knee and looked Rebekah straight in the eyes. And then his face metamorphosed into such a loving expression that even a heart of ice would melt at seeing it.

"You take care of yourself ok?" Rebekah's cold expression seemed to shake for a bit when my boss gently cupped her cheek with his hand. She just kept staring at her father and faintly nodded.

"And behave Rebekah, please."

Her reaction was immediate and quite violent. Rebekah broke loose of the closeness she had with her dad and before running up the stairs she shot him a harsh look that needed no words. Mr. Salvatore's face expressed no emotions as he saw his eldest daughter leave; I could have sworn that it wasn't the first time it happened.

"Take good care of them all, Miss Gilbert…" My boss firmly said and squeezed my shoulder as to consolidate his words.

"I will. Good luck with the movie, sir!" He simply nodded and before turning around and taking his bags he looked straight into my eyes again – for a split second I thought he was sorry to leave.

I couldn't look at him actually leave the house (I had a very bad fault when it came to this kind of stuff) so instead I went up the stairs. And found myself knocking on Rebekah's door. At first no answer came from inside and I thought she had gone to sleep. It was 5 a.m. after all. But then I heard her say "Come in" and gently made my way to her room.

"I don't want to talk, Jenna…" I closed the door shut behind me.

"It's not Jenna." That was when she bothered to look up from her desk.

"Get out of my room…" She said in a weak voice. I could tell she had been crying.

"I will, don't worry. I'm not naïve enough to think that you've changed your opinion about me."

"Why are you here? Do you want to be best friends again?" Her voice was sarcastic, just like her father's sometimes was.

"No, I'm here because of your dad." she looked at me as if I had uttered the word bomb on a plane.

"What about him?"

"He felt hurt when you ran away from him earlier. Do you really think that's the right way to behave with him?" I tried to do everything in my power to change her mind about her dad. I had no idea what was going on between them but I had to try. I made sure I didn't criticize her too much so that she wouldn't start screaming at me.

"Why do you even care so much?" She was looking me straight in the eyes, her face a mixture of sadness and anger. Rebekah was surely beautiful – she hadn't inherited her dad's eyes or hair but she had his kindness. I could see it right below that mask she was wearing every day.

"I care because I've been there. I went through all of that '_I'm misunderstood and a complete bad-ass, leave me the hell alone, father!_' ". I emphasized the word father the same way she'd spoken with her dad earlier.

"You? Little miss Perfect?" She asked quite surprised. Her answer gave me hope though despite her way of saying the words. I was finally having a normal conversation with her.

"Yes, me… I've been through all that. And I ended up regretting all of it. Look, trust me. Your father loves you very much and he only wants what's best for you. And he's trying very much to take care of you all properly. I've seen that. Just please try to cut him some slack, he seems like a great guy… If you just give it a chance, I'm sure you'll end up changing your opinion about him."

Rebekah studied me as I talked and then seemed to realize something. And then she spoke and said something I truly was not expecting.

"Are you sleeping with my dad or something?"

"Excuse me?!" Words cannot express how outraged or shocked I was.

"The whole "_you're dad is fantastic, bla bla bla"_ speech… You're either very naïve to think that my dad really cares and takes care of us properly or you're his little toy."

"Wow… I do **not** deserve this from you, Rebekah!" I said shaking my head in disbelief.

"Yeah? Well I don't deserve to have to put up with seven nannies in a row who do nothing but work here for the big paycheck that they get every month. I do not deserve for my father to leave us alone like he always used to, go chase after his dreams of being a big fancy actor while we miss him and long for his presence. I do not deserve to spend two months with Jenna, Elijah and a … _nanny_… instead of having my only living parent next to me. You think your life's not fair, Elena? Well, tell you what. _My_ life is not fair." She was unshakeable.

"Rebekah… please let me be your friend and be there for you when you need someone. Give me a chance!"

"No. I've had too many people disappointing me so far. I'm not gonna let anyone do that again - especially not a 20-year old bimbo who calls herself a high-class nanny just because she speaks four languages!" That had done it. There was only too much patience a person could have.

"I actually thought you were better than this. Your father told me to be patient, that I would eventually see the good in you. But you simply have no respect for the people around you, including your own family…" My voice was harsh and explosive but I just couldn't control myself.

"Don't you worry, Rebekah, I know when I'm not wanted, you can keep on being this fake person and insult me in any possible way. But you know what? You won't manage to make me leave the same way you did with the other nannies, no matter how hard you try." She seemed furious and simply went to the door holding it open for me to leave.

"Out of my room! NOW!" she thundered.

"Happy to leave…" I spit back and stormed out of her room feeling ashamed of myself for how I acted.

But in the end, I would have never had any peace in this house if I hadn't confronted Rebekah like this. I felt it coming from the first day I met her. I wasn't afraid she was gonna tell Mr. Salvatore, cause it hadn't been my fault. But deep down I hoped I hadn't done any irreparable damage with her.

For the following two months, Rebekah never looked me in the eye once...

* * *

The two months without Mr. Salvatore were horrible. I couldn't find my place in the empty house – it felt as if all of these kids were orphans which made my mood go horribly down.

Rebekah simply acted as if I didn't exist. After two weeks of digging my nails into my flesh I gave up completely caring about her. I couldn't live in that house any other way… I gave her as little attention as I could and in return she never even insulted me – she just refused to acknowledge my presence.

Anna was another sad story – she was the one who complained the most about not having her dad home. Which made me constantly think about Mr. Salvatore – as if I wasn't doing that enough in the first place… But I managed to fool her and drag her into Spanish and dance lessons until she couldn't remember about her dad anymore. I would have liked that strategy to work on me as well...

Tyler… well, he didn't really talk that much. But I had the most fun with him. One day he came really upset from Judo lessons and after multiple attempts I managed to make him tell me what was wrong i.e. the Uchi-mata throwing technique. So I ended up helping him with that. In a strange way, I felt the most connected to Tyler. He was pretty much what I used to be like as a kid – quiet, tenacious, not bugging anyone with complaints. He never really said that he missed his dad but I could tell that he did from his behaviour.

John was the least of my worries apart from the moment when he almost swallowed a small wheel from one of his cars. Luckily enough I got to him and stopped him from doing that.

Jenna and Elijah had a flawless behaviour towards me, as well as Stefan and Caroline. She actually tried very hard to make me go with her shopping, to her favorite massage place, etc. I always turned her down until she put her foot down and dragged me out of the house to a very expensive dress shop. We tried on a few dresses until I found one that I really loved which was a simple black dress. Instead of letting me buy that Caroline convinced me to try a bit of colour and I ended up buying a really elegant red and golden knee-length dress just in case "I ever were to go out one night…"

My days were full – when I wasn't with the kids, I was at the gym or art class. At a certain point, getting bored while taking care of John, I started counting the dots on the wall, if you can imagine that. Everything in my head was screaming one thing only. But I had to try extremely hard not to think about it as much as I wanted to. For about two months I had to accomplish the hardest task of my life – not thinking about Damon Salvatore…

* * *

On Saturday the 14th of July, early in the morning I got a call on my cell phone – which I rarely used. The number was unknown so I was going to let it ring but then something made me pick up.

"Yes?" I nonchalantly asked.

"Elena!" By the squeaky voice at the end of the line I could tell it was Caroline Forbes.

"Oh, hi Caroline! How are you?"

"No time for small talk! Damon has just called me and is going to tear both Stefan and me apart for forgetting such an important day! I'm sorry for calling you this early…" well, if she believed that 9 a.m. was too early… "..but I really need your help. Ugggh, I can't believe I forgot all about this."

"Ok, slow down, Caroline! I can barely understand what you're saying…"

"You're not helping, Elena… Look, I need you to get dressed, ask Jenna to take care of Anna and Tyler and in approximately 20 minutes I'll be picking you up together with Stefan, ok?"

"Wait… I still don't understand what's happening."

"Look, you just do what I've said, did you get that?"

"Yes…I got that bit. But Caroline, Mr. Salvatore said to never leave the kids on their own unless it was an emergency."

"This _is_ an emergency – a huge one actually! We forgot about Rebekah's birthday, Elena! That's what happened…"

"Oh…" I was stunned – everybody had forgotten about the girl's birthday?

"You're joking right, Caroline?"

"Elena, I got out of bed at 8.30 a.m. on a Saturday! I have no make-up, my hair is a complete mess and I haven't had my morning coffee. And I'm getting in my car right now! Does it sound like I'm joking?"

"Um…"

"Do NOT answer that. Look, we got to get her each a present, including you, and then we need to buy decorations and everything so that we can have a small party tonight. Do you copy, soldier?"

"Yes, I copy, I mean… I understand." Boy, Caroline Forbes surely was a scary woman when she wanted to.

* * *

Everything had been arranged – green decorations, gifts and a beautiful cake which had a horse drawn on it because Rebekah was apparently quite good at riding. Everyone had been instructed to gather in the room and keep quiet whilst we waited for Rebekah to come downstairs in the living room. It seemed so pathetic that everybody had forgotten about the birthday. It seemed even more pathetic that she hated me and I had helped organize the whole thing for her. But the most pathetic bit was that her father was in England, shooting the remake of Pride and Prejudice, a modern version of the story. He was of course playing Mr. Darcy.

Nothing seemed right as we heard Rebekah come down the stairs. But still, the whole thing went on. The moment she came into the room we all jumped and shouted "Surprise!" She seemed a tad taken aback but recovered quite easily. She realized in an instant what was happening and without hesitation she turned around wanting to leave. I shook my head as I realized what she was doing but then felt my stomach fill with butterflies and my breathing increase as I saw Mr. Salvatore out of all people standing in front of the living room. Rebekah stopped and was truly amazed to see her father right in front of her. I felt my resentment for her actions vanish as I saw her literally jumping in her father's arms and tears coming down her cheeks…

After singing Happy birthday and opening presents, Rebekah went upstairs to sleep. It was 9pm when I started cleaning the living room after all the kids were tucked in bed and about to fall asleep. I was holding a dirty plate in my hand when Mr. Salvatore appeared in the living room. He had a mysterious and loving smile on his face that made me forget what planet I was even living on. I felt my heart flutter as I heard his sweet voice.

"The party was a success, Miss Gilbert. Thank you for making it possible." I shook my head fervently.

"It wasn't because of me sir. It was all because of you – everyone saw how happy Rebekah was when you showed up…" my voice was sad.

"Is everything alright, Elena?" His eyebrows were arched in surprise. After a pause I decided to be honest and speak my mind.

"She needs her father to be home." My answer took him completely aback. He didn't even have time to answer me.

"Rebekah and the rest of them – they're unhappy when you're not here with them. Rebekah…" My answer got stuck in my throat. I couldn't believe it was my first conversation with him after two months and I was criticizing him.

"Please speak your mind, Miss Gilbert. I don't want it any other way." He seemed sincere and not offended by this. That gave me courage to carry on.

"She feels her life isn't fair."

"She told you that?" Now he seemed shocked.

"Yes, she did…"

"How did you even manage to make her talk?"

"We had a brief fight…right after you left. It doesn't matter to me that she said bad things to me, but I think you deserve to know that she needs you to be truly present in her life. I don't mean to offend you by saying this, I just… I can't help her if she doesn't firstly get help from her dad." My whole childhood came playing in front of my eyes as I said that.

"I am going to be here for them. I'm not leaving anymore." It was my turn to be taken aback.

"What do you mean sir?"

"It's not for me anymore – movies. They used to mean a lot but not anymore. Not since Katherine died." That was the first time he ever uttered his wife's name in my presence.

"I'm sorry about that…" I didn't know what to say...

"Don't be – that ship sailed a long time ago." He seemed a bit nostalgic.

"I feel awkward. I shouldn't have said anything about Rebekah." I said looking at my feet.

"No, don't do that! I'm glad you did. I prefer that kind of honesty to people telling me _'She'll be fine, just give her space and time to heal'_. I've done that and it hasn't given any results. Plus, I trust your judgement better than the others'."

"Thank you sir." I really felt touched.

"How do you feel Miss Gilbert?" He seemed worried.

"Not too bad sir." I smiled.

"Good… are you rested?"

"Yes, I am…" My answer was weary but true – I didn't feel tired at all.

"Do you have any plans for tonight?" Ok, this was getting weird.

"No, I wanted to read a novel…but…no, no other plans." His grin became wider as he said the following.

"Oh, good then... The novel can wait another night, don't you think?" His smile became mysterious.

"I guess so… Sir, I must admit,I don't understand where all of this is going."

"Get dressed, Miss Gilbert. Caroline, Stefan, me and you are going out tonight." My jaw dropped when I heard those words coming out of his perfectly-shaped mouth.

"Um…" I was dumbstruck. Damon Salvatore together with his brother and Caroline wanted me to go out with them?

"Why?" I asked.

"Why are we going out?" He seemed very amused by my reaction. He was actually enjoying this whole thing.

"No, why do you want to go out with me of all people?"

"Because the birthday girl deserves a night out after two months of slaving for cruel Mr. Salvatore." His jokey voice made me laugh but it was a nervous laugh.

"How did you know my birthday was today…?" His cunning smile gave me hot shivers down my spine.

"I have my sources, Miss Gilbert." If I didn't know better, I'd say his voice had a flirty tone to it. I was starting to imagine things.

"Sir, you've just come back from London. I appreciate your intention of making me have fun but you really don't need to go to all this effort for me. I really don't like birthdays that much."

"Then you have an awful lot in common with my daughter." He meant Rebekah…

"I…"

"Come on, Elena, trust me. Get dressed in something fancy, relax for a bit and let's have some fun tonight. Let us be here for you – at least on your birthday. You deserve to go out for a change. You've been trapped between these four walls the whole summer so far. If you won't come for yourself, then come for me."

I hesitated although his gorgeous eyes made me rethink my judgement. I hated the influence he had on me - I wonder if he knew about this power of his.

"Please?" He was actually saying please to me going out with them… With _him_….

"Ok… I'll be ready in half an hour."

* * *

_**Please review, express yourself and say what you want from the story! I'll promise Chapter 12 will be legendary for DELENA.. Until next time! :)**_


	12. Chapter 12 Safe and sound

_**Author's note: Guys, I'm really sorry for not updating earlier. There's been a lot of hassle in my life lately. Had to leave home again after summer break and get ready for University. Am spending a bit of time with my boyfriend, whom I haven't seen for a while, so everything has taken up quite a bit of my time... The summer is almost over and I promise I'll be doing my best with the story before I start Uni. To make up for three weeks of not posting I've made this chapter extra long for all of you. I really hope you enjoy it. The action at the end of the chapter will be continued, don't you worry. The chapter's title is inspired by Taylor Swift's song Safe and Sound. I really hope you enjoy it! And thank you all for being patient!**_

* * *

**CHAPTER 12 – SAFE AND SOUND**

* * *

**ELENA's POV**

The bottle of extra-black mascara was trembling in my left hand as I finished my make-up. I looked up and down in the mirror. I had not dressed up in a very long time – since the last time I'd gone out with Mason. He had wrecked so many things in me, including my desire to go out and have fun. I had forgotten how much I loved putting on an elegant dress, impossibly-high heels and make-up. I didn't want to brag but I had completed a make-up artist course so I knew all of those little secrets behind movie-stars' red carpet looks. And tonight, after a long time, I had finally found the pleasure in doing that again.

I looked at myself again in the 2-metre high mirror that was placed in my bedroom. I felt my entire body tingling in such an unfamiliar way. My stomach was tied in knots and I couldn't find my normal heart rhythm – it was simply irregular over and over again. His beautiful eyes appeared in front of my face, staring back at me in the lovely way he usually did - even when I was criticizing him. Those gorgeous blue eyes that held so many emotions in them…

I was so excited about the whole night that I couldn't stop flinching and moving around the room like I was about to go on a stage in front of millions of people. It was the same feeling that I had before an interview or something life-changing. It didn't make sense of course because I was simply going out with Stefan, Caroline and… Damon. His name – just mentally saying it – made warm shivers go down my spine. I knew I shouldn't be feeling all of these things because my boss. I was a realist. Nothing could ever happen between us. He had four kids, was a pained widower and a rich movie star and… me? I was **nothing** compared to him.

Just a simple nanny... One that worked for him, that took care of his kids. That even fought with his eldest daughter once in a while. I wasn't only that though. I had to keep reminding myself why I could never let myself fall in love again. At the end of the day, nothing could change – the damage that I had suffered would forever follow me, my entire life. There was no getting rid of it. I never let anyone get close enough to me – I had never let Mason get close enough either. My soul was too sick for me to ever live a normal life. Something anyone could understand from witnessing my whole present really... This wasn't a normal home or a normal job.

And the feelings that were coursing through me weren't normal either. Every time I heard his voice or saw his face, I just felt my entire being light up with joy. And he wasn't mine to fight for. He wasn't for me. But that wouldn't prevent me from at least dreaming about him… And being happy every second I got to spend with him. I deserved at least that.

I took one last look in the mirror before taking my purse and walking out of the room. My heart filled with something I hadn't felt for a long time. I felt…beautiful. I actually **thought** I looked beautiful. It was such a strange feeling that I couldn't help but marvel… And rejoice in the feeling again and again. I felt confident again – something had changed me but I didn't know what it was.

The moment I went down the stairs I heard Stefan and Caroline talking to my boss in the hallway. My confidence was slowly vanishing as I saw Mr. Salvatore again. And then as he turned around to look at me something inside me caught fire. The way he was staring at me, from head to toe, was such a loving and beautiful reaction that I held my breath for a few seconds. I'd always had such bad stage fright so I started minding my steps as I went down the stairs. The last thing I wanted was to trip and make a fool of myself. Not tonight… Not when his eyes were so surprised and… in awe?! I made myself look away as I came on the same level with all of them. I couldn't hold his stare – it was too much for me to bear.

"Elena…" Mr. Salvatore managed to utter.

I blushed; hearing my first name said by Mr. Salvatore made me have courage and look him in the eye. He looked gorgeous – he was wearing only a light white shirt, his sleeves rolled up and a pair of dark blue jeans. And still, he looked so naturally beautiful that my skin warmed instantly.

"Oh my GOD!" Caroline squeaked making me flinch. "Elena, you look amazing! I am so good, aren't I?" She was referring to my dress, one of the many she had made me buy a few weeks before.

"You definitely deserve the glory, Caroline!" I said as she hugged me tightly. She was enough to make my mood go up.

"Honey, maybe you should give Elena a chance to breathe…" Stefan said in an amused tone. Caroline did release me from her hug.

"I am so proud of you, Elena! And so psyched about tonight!" I smiled at her words, I was psyched as well.

"So, where are we all going?" I asked.

"One word: Dancing!" Caroline squeaked again. I turned to Stefan and my boss and I was really surprised. I had expected something different I guess. Stefan raised his hands in a defensive way and replied.

"Don't look at me! I hate dancing. Hence, it wasn't my idea."

"Of course not. It was **mine**." Caroline's shining grin could have stopped cats in their track during the night. "I managed to get VIP seats in one of L.A.'s best clubs – it is actually rumoured that it is the** best** of current summer clubs! I've wanted to go there for weeks."

"Well, you have the incredible chance of going now, Barbie." Caroline's face froze at hearing Mr. Salvatore's reply.

"I told you never to call me that, Damon!" She hissed.

"Oh, come on! Why not have a little fun if I can? Right, Miss Gilbert?" His devilish smile surfaced and I felt my skin warming up as I was struggling to reply. Caroline beat me to it.

"Hmm. Just ignore him Elena. He can be a first class **jackass** when he wants to." Caroline coldly replied. Mr. Salvatore rolled his eyes and I had to refrain from grinning.

"Well, I think ignoring me tonight would be a little hard, don't you think Blondie?" I swear a vein had appeared on Caroline's forehead when Stefan abruptly interrupted my boss.

"Ok, that's enough for tonight Damon."

"Oh, come on, baby bro! Are you upset that I called your girlfriend a Barbie doll?" Mr Salvatore said while putting his arm around Stefan's shoulders.

"Do you really want me to answer that?" Stefan's eyes were icy but I could see the hint of amusement hidden behind his mask.

"Ooooh, you've become touchy. What has L.A. done to you, brother? You know, I think you should give up on that bunny food you've been eating lately. I heard it makes you gloomy and sulky. Not too good when you're in court all day long trying to make people like you." I tried very hard to contain my laughter at hearing my boss's sarcastic words.

"Bunny food?! You're calling my probiotic vegetarian diet rabbit food?!" Caroline thundered. I was watching this whole show with a lot of interest. Damon took one step back and put on his crooked smile when he replied.

"Hey, calm down, Blondie. If Stefan likes being whipped, who am I to judge?" Stefan caught Caroline before she could reach Mr. Salvatore. She seemed downright furious.

"Sorry about that… too much?" My boss asked.

"Maybe just a bit Damon… Although I am really keen to find out why you're in such a good mood..." Stefan replied quite cunningly. Mr. Salvatore briefly furrowed his eyebrows.

"Just happy to be home, brother. Now, shall we go to my car?"

"I am not going **anywhere** with **him **in this jerk-like mood."Caroline spat.

"Fine, sweetie. We'll take **our** car then." Stefan gently said taking Caroline out of the house. That left me alone with Mr. Salvatore who was smiling at me quite friendly.

"Completely whipped." He stated and I couldn't help but burst out with laughter. He was really funny and had a crazy sarcastic edge to his every word tonight – more than I had ever seen him being sarcastic.

"Why, Miss Gilbert, how **dare** you laugh at my humourless jokes?" My boss asked while impersonating Caroline. A giggle escaped my lips.

"They're not humourless at all. They're actually quite good. But I don't think it would be a good idea to keep doing that to her tonight. She looked as if she was going to explode." I said and smiled.

"I guess you're right. I promise I'll behave for the rest of the night." He said and **winked** at me. I was a bit shocked. Had I just imagined that?!

"So, shall we go to the car now, Elena?" I felt my lips curve upwards as I heard my first name.

"Sure sir." When we got outside Caroline and Stefan were already in the car waiting for us as well. But when my boss reached to open the car Caroline blocked the doors and angrily said.

"Oh, no! You're not coming with us. You're taking your **own** car." My eyes turned to my boss.

"What? That's ridiculous." He seemed quite taken aback.

"Damon, please…" Stefan said.

"Say you're sorry." Caroline said.

"**Excuse me?!**" Ok, that had done it.

"Apologize for what you said earlier about us." Caroline demanded.

"What, are we in kindergarten again?"

"One of us is…" Caroline spat back.

"Stefan, why don't you have better control on your woman?"

"I'm sorry, how did this become my fault?" Stefan asked.

"Just let me get in, Caroline."

"Not until you apologize." Caroline Forbes sure was one stubborn creature.

"Fine…" I was stunned – Damon Salvatore would actually apologize for one of his sarcastic comments?

"I'll take my own car." Caroline seemed completely defeated at hearing Mr. Salvatore's victory words.

"Come on, Damon…" Stefan said.

"No, no, it's perfect this way. You two love birds head off. We'll be there before you reach the club." We? Did he mean him and…**me_?_**

"Come on, Elena!" He said and winked at me mysteriously. Ok, I had not imagined that. I was sure of it.

"Let me show you something cool." I threw him a skeptic look. But when he beckoned me to follow him I turned around and said goodbye to Stefan and Caroline who were already driving off.

I reluctantly followed my boss to his garage where he unveiled one of the most stunning cars in the world. I felt my breath get stuck in my throat at seeing that beauty. Mr. Salvatore seemed very pleased with my reaction. I felt my grin get ten times bigger.

"It's…." I struggled to put in words.

"Takes your breath away, doesn't she?" My boss asked with his arms crossed, smiling back at me. He said _she_ as if the car was actually his baby.

"It does more than that. A Porsche Boxter…oh my God."

"You know this type of car?!" He asked me quite surprised. I was foolishly happy to have impressed him with that. I felt my voice turn cocky as I continued.

"Of course I do! It hasn't even come out on the market yet. How did you manage to get one of these?" I could hear my admiration for the four wheeled vehicle.

"It sometimes pays to be an actor." He cockily grinned at me. It obviously did pay to be an actor…

"It's just… perfect. You know that it was designed after the Carrera GT and 550 Spider, right sir?" His mouth fell slightly open as he heard my comment.

"Yes, I knew…" He seemed genuinely confused as he came to stand right next to me, deeply looking into my eyes. "The question is, though, how is it that a Los Angeles nanny knows so much about cars?" His question made me blush.

"My father fixes cars in his free time as a hobby. He is really passionate about it. I guess I inherited that passion from him." His expression got sad for a certain reason. But then he widely smiled trying to cover it up.

"That would solve the mystery." His eyes were searching mine for something. I dropped his gaze after a few seconds.

"Shall we get in the car, Elena?" I nodded in response and then before I could reach the car, he was there, like a true gentleman and opened the door for me to get in. I couldn't stop smiling about the whole thing. After he got in the car off we were, smoothly making our way through the crowded city.

"I feel like putting some music on, what do you say?" He asked me while waiting at a red light.

"That sounds great."

"You can choose the music – it is your birthday after all." I felt my face drop as I heard his words. Unfortunately he had caught that.

"Is everything ok? Did I say something wrong?" Damn it, I felt so bad already.

"No, you didn't sir. I just keep forgetting that it's my birthday, that's all." I replied, trying to seem happy about it.

"How come?! Birthdays are usually something to be happy about." Yes, he was right there.

"No, I **am** happy. I just haven't celebrated it in a few years." After telling the truth I felt exposed in front of him. He turned his blue-grey eyes to look into mine and I was scared he would insist on finding out even more. Instead he was a complete gentleman about it.

"Well, good thing you're celebrating this one. Hopefully we'll make up for all of those missed birthdays." God, he was being so nice to me. I couldn't have asked for a better boss. I didn't even know if I could call him my boss anymore. Not after what he was doing for me tonight.

"Thank you sir. For all of this… You shouldn't have to worry about taking me out. You just got back from England after two months of filming and you probably just wanted to get a good night's sleep and… I'm the one preventing you from doing that. Just because it's my birthday…" I was surprised to see my boss pull on the right side of the street and stop the car. He turned to me and I didn't know what to expect. He seemed simply puzzled.

"I've never met someone like you, Elena." That sentence made my stomach fill with butterflies in just one second. A long pause followed and I just felt I had to break it.

"What do you mean by that sir?" He just shook his head while gently laughing and turned around to face me.

"I mean **you**. It's actually everything about you. For example, you call me _sir_ all the time." He said that as if I was doing something wrong, unnatural. I felt the need to defend myself.

"You **are** my boss."

"Yes, I normally am but not tonight, Elena. We're going to go and have fun in a few minutes so you need to stop calling me sir." He smiled as he said that.

"Can I call you Mr. Salvatore instead?" I felt really stupid about this whole thing. He laughed in response.

"Just call me Damon." I shook my head feverishly.

"I can't do that."

"Why not?" He was in a weird state – amusement, surprise, confusion and annoyance – they were all written on his face.

"Because I can't call you by your first name for an evening and then go back to sir. I prefer to respect you completely all the time." He seemed taken aback by my firmness.

"Fine, I understand where you're coming from. Tell you what…From now on you're calling me Damon all the time." My body froze. I didn't want this!

"I can't…"

"Yes, you can, Elena." His voice was a tad demanding. "Stop being silly! You've been working for me for three months now. I think it's time to switch to a first name basis." He saw me getting ready to cut the ground from under his feet and replied instead.

"It's an order. Call me by my first name or I will have to fire you." His reply took me by surprise. And that was the way Damon Salvatore managed to make me speechless. So I needed to compromise. Great…

"Ok, I'll try to…get over my awkwardness." Damon seemed pleased about my answer. And then he did something that made me go crazy on the inside. He took my hand into his and squeezed it very gently. I couldn't remember how to breathe normally as his blue eyes pierced mine.

"Don't worry about me. I feel neither tired nor obliged to take you out because it's your birthday. I'm doing this because I feel good doing it. Stop feeling guilty about the whole thing. Instead, promise me you'll be happy and have some fun tonight. Just take some time out. Trust me, problems are still going to be there when we go back home. Look, step away from your life for 5 minutes! Just relax tonight… If you can't find it in your heart to be happy for yourself, then do it for me."

Damon Salvatore was so beautiful in that moment, sitting in his car and holding my hand while being on a random street whose name I didn't know. I couldn't contain it any longer… I just felt the growing urge to reach out and…

"I will."

I answered him just to block out my inappropriate thoughts. He seemed convinced, at least on the surface, of my answer. He slowly let go of my hand and took the steering wheel back in his possession as we drove off to the club. We were quiet for the rest of the journey, no music at all – I have no idea what he was thinking. But I know exactly what I was thinking about – **him**. In every single possible way a woman could think of a man. And I was trying really hard to stop thinking about him like that. Otherwise Damon Salvatore would be the death of me.

* * *

"It's time to paaaaarty!" Caroline screamed as she placed a plastic diadem on my head.

We had arrived at the club a few minutes after Caroline and Stefan. And I must say, I was completely amazed by everything that the L.A. night life meant. There were so many clubs, one fancier than the other, so many people going out on the streets and partying – even on the beach when they couldn't find space inside a club. It was pretty much intoxicating. I had never been a fan of clubbing but the atmosphere in L.A. was just alluring.

I could only imagine my face the moment we got into the VIP room in the club – so classy, I bet so expensive as well. My boss was looking at me with such delighted eyes; I could tell he loved my every reaction – when a valet came and took the car to park it; when the security guy let us go directly inside although tens of people were in a cue waiting to get in; and especially when Ryan Gosling (**of all people!**) came and shook hands with my boss – that was the cherry on top.

"Here is our champagne guys…" Stefan said handing each of us a glass of the sweet drink. When Mr. Salvatore asked me what type of alcoholic drink I liked I had just blurted out sweet champagne – the only one I really did enjoy. Despite my protests, he ordered the most expensive bottle in the club to celebrate me.

"This is to the birthday girl!" Damon stated raising his glass. We all mimicked his gesture.

"May you have a lifetime of happiness, Elena! Your adult life has just begun!" He was referring to me turning 21. I smiled in response and sincerely thanked him.

"Now, since this is the first time you're officially allowed to drink, I believe a ton of tequila will do the trick for tonight!" Caroline announced and snapped her fingers. In a matter of seconds 8 tequila shots were placed on our table waiting for us to consume them.

"Wooow…" I uttered shaking my head. I could not drink that – no way…

"It's ok, Elena, you don't have to drink if you don't want to." Damon said gently squeezing my arm. He received a few ugly glances from Caroline but managed to get me off the hook very easily. I was grateful to him for that.

After the tequila shots were drunk came the actual party. Damon and Stefan didn't really want to dance so they just hanged around our table chatting with their acquaintances. It was just me and Caroline on the dance floor swaying our bodies according to the music. There was such good music in the club tonight – no horrible remixes – which made my day since I truly loved dancing. We must have danced on a lot of songs: _On the floor, Ai se eu te pego, We found love, The boy does nothing_ and so on. Caroline was so much fun – I couldn't have pictured her in a club before but she was on a roll tonight. Her really good mood must have probably been because of the alcohol… She did seem a bit tipsy after all.

As we were sat at the bar and chatting whilst drinking our Pina Colladas I momentarily glanced towards our table and was surprised to see my boss with another woman. They seemed pretty close, talking and even laughing once in a while. I was shocked to realize that I knew the woman – she was Andie Star, the 30-year-old local newscaster for KABC Los Angeles. Tall, slim, golden-blonde hair, light brown eyes and a gorgeous wide smile. She was really something. I remembered seeing her every morning on TV whilst eating breakfast. I actually liked her.

But now I simply felt that I didn't like her anymore. I mean, how could I? She was right there next to my boss, looking all sexy in a short green dress with her hair pulled back in a bun; and from what I could notice she was flirting with him. I felt completely weak for being jealous of her. It wasn't fair of me really. She was probably a nice woman – she really seemed to be a nice woman, had that kind face and behaviour. I was lucky that Caroline wasn't very observant tonight otherwise I would have been so caught staring at Damon. I was pulled out of my day dream by a very upset Caroline.

"I'm going to get Stefan. I'm really sick of this "_I'm not dancing_" stunt. He will dance, whether he likes it or not." I half-pitied Stefan at that moment…

"Ok, Caroline, I'll be right there in a sec." The truth was that I had no desire to go back to the table. Not when you could read the jealousy on my face.

But just as Caroline left I was surprised to see Damon leaving Andie's side in quite an abrupt way. A very confused and sad Andie I might add... The look on her face screamed rejection. That was when I realized that she was the one coming onto him. And he just didn't fancy her at all. Whilst I was digesting that information, I saw my boss coming towards me with a glass of whiskey in his hands. There was a quite romantic and quaint song playing that had filled the dance floor with couples. Damon sat next to me on a bar stool.

"Why are you looking at me with those judgy little eyes?" His voice was half amused half annoyed. I blushed at realizing that I had been rudely staring the whole time.

"You totally blew her off…" I could not believe that sentence had escaped my mouth. He didn't seem upset though. I think that he honestly appreciated my bluntness. In earnest, not many people could stand it…

"Yeah, well…I should steer clear of all women at the moment." He replied and took a sip of his drink. He seemed troubled about something.

"You know, you don't have to do that to yourself…" I was being sympathetic and I didn't even understand why.

"Trust me, it's in the best interest of women everywhere." My eyes went wide at hearing his reply. So much sorrow in his voice… Why would he even say that? He was a God…

Before I could reply the club filled with a gong-like song announcing the beginning of another song. I recognized it in an instant. My eyes involuntarily closed and I started humming every single word Loreen was singing: _Why, why can't this moment last forever more? Tonight, tonight eternity's an open door…_ The moment I opened my eyes again Damon was standing right in front of me. The look in his eyes was simply mesmerizing. He gently took my hand and asked me:

"Would you dance with me, Elena?" I was out of words and before I could think things through I nodded and followed him whilst my skin went hotter and hotter where he was touching it.

When we reached the dance floor the chorus came and before I knew it Damon spun me away from him and then back into his arms. I felt my whole face and body light up and I could tell that a huge grin had formed on my face. I was so surprised and happy – I never would've imagined that Damon Salvatore enjoyed dancing. But he did – you could tell it from the way his eyes vibrated with the music. You could tell it from his every move, from the way he would just lead me – so easily, without hesitation.

I was surprised to feel my body being pulled against his as the song's rhythm mellowed down. I was so close to him that I could see every crease and feature that his face held. God, he was such a beautiful man.

"You're good at this" I told him without thinking. My reply gave him a reason for a very cocky smirk to appear on his face.

"I've got moves you've never seen kid." He said that directly into my ear making me shiver with pleasure. His breath, a mixture of alcohol and his sweet scent was truly intoxicating.

_We are free, we're everything's allowed and love comes first.._

Hearing those lyrics made him pull me even closer to his body until I could literally feel every bit of him. He wasn't dancing with me in a dirty way though – I know what dirty dancing was like; but there was so much magnetism between us that I couldn't ignore it. I felt my knees going weak. If it wasn't for him holding me so tight I would've collapsed to the floor.

_From now on only you and I, We're going u-u-u-u-u-u-u-up_

I felt so happy. The music simply flooded my whole being and I felt as if this was the sweetest dream. Me dancing with Damon Salvatore, him staring into my eyes…Me craving his every glance, his every touch… All of this while I was being spun and captured again and again in his strong arms…

_Forever we sail into infinity, We're higher, we're reaching for divinity._

And then it all started coming back. Me dancing with Matt in a club in Mayfield... And then later on with Mason in New York City… Me finding out about my family after leaving the club with Matt… My dad's bloody face and the cast around my brother's neck…

_Euphoria…_

Mason breaking up with me and shouting of all those things in my face… All of those days spent in the hospital wishing I were dead…

_Euphoria…_

All of this – my burning desire for my boss, the fact that he was a pained widower and a father of four children; I was their nanny for God's sake; the way he held me, the way I wanted even more and more from him – all of this was so wrong… I could feel it. I wasn't this person; and still here I was playing with fire, thinking he could be mine one day; forgetting that I should never again celebrate my birthday, that it would always be a day to mourn…

_We're going u-u-u-u-u-u-u-up…_

Before I knew it, my body went numb and Damon dropped my hands; he could see my growing discomfort. Seeing his worried and confused face made me want to run away. But it wasn't him that made me take that decision. Everything that my life had been until that moment made me do something I hadn't done before – run so fast out of that club as if my life depended on it.

By the time I got on the street, my head was spinning and I felt lonelier than ever. I was completely lost. I realized right then and there that I had really nothing left in the world.

* * *

**DAMON's POV**

I ran through the crowds attempting not to lose her after she had stormed out of the club. It was harder than it looked since she was very good at it. So many people were staring at me while I shoved and went past them just to be sure that I wouldn't lose Elena. She was a pretty good runner for her condition –and I meant her asthma. My head was spinning as I saw her running out of the club and onto the street without even looking back.

I had upset her deeply; I could tell. I couldn't focus on that fact right now though; the only thing I could do was to hope she didn't hate me for the way I had touched and stared at her while dancing. I couldn't help it. I was going to hell for sure, there was no denying it. But I couldn't help feeling all of this for her. She was just special – her body was so curvy and to die for; her face was just sweet and kind; and her personality – well, let's just say that she had a very strong one; she was anything but a push-over. Something that I loved about her… I felt sorry about my behaviour especially since her pretty little face was clearly shocked because of something. And I feared I was to blame for that.

I finally managed to catch up when she suddenly stopped. I could tell she was sobbing. Her inhaler was in her right hand. Oh no… But then when she finally turned around to face me her face was a mixture of sadness, firmness and anger. Her voice was hoarse.

"It's not appropriate – what we're doing… how we danced inside. I can't deal with this now, Damon." She had called me _Damon_… That little thing made me feel stupidly good. Seeing me without words she got angrier and turned to quickly walk away.

"Elena, wait!" I shouted not caring if anyone heard or saw me.

No, I didn't care what she said or what was appropriate in our situation. She was upset and I couldn't let her go home on her own at night and definitely not in that state. To hell with everything else! I never cared about others' opinions anyway and I wasn't going to start caring now. I ran down the street and caught Elena's arm, making her turn around and face me. She seemed startled as her beautiful brown eyes were wide open in something that looked a bit like fear. I slowly let go of her, cupping her face in my hands. Elena tensed because of my proximity, just like earlier when we were dancing.

"Hey…" I said in a gentle tone. "I can't let you go like this. I'm sorry about the whole night, I didn't mean to make you feel uncomfortable… That wasn't my intention. I mean it." That dance had indeed been intense – hell, I couldn't even take my eyes off her – or her beautiful body for that matter. _DAMN IT, Salvatore! Snap out of it – she feels bad, can't you see that?_

"I believe you." She weakly said making my muscles relax in an instant. I loved the fact that she trusted me. I smiled whilst letting go off her face.

"Be honest with me, Elena – are you upset because of the dance? Or is it something else?" She looked away for a bit thinking about her answer and then turned her brown eyes to pierce mine.

"No… It's not the dance." She was honest – I could see it in her eyes.

"Good girl… Thank you for telling me the truth." She nodded biting her lip for some reason.

"I can't go back inside that club. It's just not me…" I could understand her completely.

"I get it."

"I doubt you can…" She said shaking her head.

"Well, I used to like it. But now I don't anymore. It's not me – I've changed…" Her eyes seemed surprised to hear me say that.

"I guess you do get it…" I slowly nodded and took a few steps towards her.

"Do you want to go home, Elena?"

"I'm not sure…" Her voice was slightly tired.

"Well, given the fact that it's still your birthday, would you like to go for a walk somewhere? No more clubs or big noisy crowds…" I smiled looking like a very polite and good boy – the same look I would use to convince my parents when I wanted something.

"I don't know…Where could we even go at this hour?" I internally yelled as I happily acknowledged that I was winning her over. Now it was time for some old tricks.

"Oh, I know the perfect place… What do you say?"

I cursed myself as I heard my flirty tone. What was wrong with me? How could this 21-year-old girl bring out so many feelings in me? Feelings that I had thought to be long dead... It didn't make sense – especially since right now, she never looked less like Katherine. But I loved that about her. I felt like I was going mad…

"I'm not sure if I want to party any more tonight…" Her kind voice made the feelings that I had for her grow even more.

"Hey, I didn't say **anything** about partying…"

"I don't know, Mr…." She bit her lip as she remembered her promise. "…Damon." I couldn't help but grin at her childish manner.

"Elena, tell me this… when was the last time you had a night out?" I pierced her eyes patiently waiting for her answer. As events clicked in her head Elena seemed to realize how long it had been since her eyes went all wide. She seemed ashamed to say it out loud though.

"A long time ago…" She wanted to go out, I could hear it in her voice.

"Elena…do you trust me?" She didn't need more than two seconds.

"Yes."

I was taken aback by the firmness in her answer. It brought me so much joy to see that I was trusted by this lovely girl. I felt my lips turn into a mysterious but reassuring smile and both my devilish and protective side took over in an instant.

"Then you have nothing to worry about."

* * *

"Elena's phone…" I answered seeing Stefan's name appear on the screen.

"Where is she? Why do you have Elena's phone? Is she ok?" My baby bro was so cute when he was all panicked. I could hear his voice despite the loud music in the background.

"Elena? She's perfectly fine, waiting for her to come back to the car." She had gone out to buy some some food for our little adventure trip.

"Where are you?!" This was going to be fun.

"Can't tell you that…"

"What do you mean you can't tell me?" He was getting annoyed. I always enjoyed this part.

"Well, I promised Elena I would take her somewhere where she didn't have to worry about anything. And you and Barbie knowing about this, trust me – it would make her worry."

"You're talking nonsense, you know that, right?"

"I've been told that before." I couldn't help but widely grin.

"You're not being funny, Damon."

"I'm not trying to."

"Why the hell did you leave the club?" Ooh, so the shouting begins.

"Elena didn't want to stay anymore."

"As if I'm actually gonna believe **that one**…"

"I am shocked as to how little faith you have in me, Stefan."

"Can we spare the drama just for once Damon?"

"Brother, trust me when I say this – you're the only one acting like a drama queen here." That had done the trick.

"I'm not going to ask again. **Where** are you, Damon?" He was pissing me off. I finally decided to tell him the truth

"Next to a beach… We're going for a walk. She didn't' want to go back home so I took her out for a quiet birthday party." There was a pause before the storm unleashed.

"On a **beach**?! Damon, she has just turned 21. What do you even plan on doing with her?" I could feel him starting to explode. I rolled my eyes at hearing his question

"What do you think I am, an animal? Of course I'm not gonna do anything to her. What, do you actually think I would do something to her? Hey, don't' worry, I'll bring her back before 2 a.m., dad."

"Are you insane?! Have you finally lost your mind?" My head already ached and I had only been talking to my brother for 2 minutes.

"Last time I checked it, my head was absolutely fine…" I was being sarcastic.

"Well check it again, Damon, because something is clearly wrong with it!" Stefan shouted. I swear he was getting on my nerves. I know I shouldn't even try to calm down.

"You're boring me, brother. I'm hanging up now. Honestly, don't you guys worry, we're both fine. And I mean it." All jokes aside...

"Damon, stop playing with fire already, will you? This girl is not…"

"You have a good evening, ok? Bye now!" And I shut the phone so that he couldn't reply anymore. Ugh, that had been unpleasant. I was sure he wouldn't call back. Right now Barbie was probably hugging him, trying not to let that little smart lawyer-head of his explode.

I thought about Stefan's words. I completely disagreed with him. I wasn't planning on doing anything to her. I could never do that. She didn't like me the way I liked her. She couldn't – she was still a child when it came to that, I was sure of it. No way in hell was I going to hurt her. It wasn't in my nature to do that – not when it came to Elena. When I saw her come out of the store wearing high heels and that beautiful golden-red dress, her hands filled with shopping bags I felt like the luckiest guy in the world – cause I knew I would be spending this whole evening just with her...

* * *

**ELENA's POV**

I was sitting on a blanket on the Point Dume State beach admiring the sky filled with stars above me. It was the most romantic atmosphere ever. An outdoor midnight picnic; a fancy car illuminating the blanket; nice music playing on the car radio; the sound of the ocean waves; and Damon Salvatore… That would qualify as the best of dates ever imagined by girls all over the world. And I was lucky enough to have it tonight. I knew it wasn't a date – it seemed like it but nothing of this had been planned beforehand. It had just happened given the circumstances.

"I'm gonna kill that guy from the liquor store. He gave me dry champagne instead of sweet one." He was so sweet getting everything I wanted. He had even paid attention to the champagne I liked.

"It's nothing to worry about. I don't mind." I was already happy just to be here with him.

"Yeah, well, I hate people that are slow and don't pay attention to customers' requests." He said taking out the plastic cups.

"It's nothing, really. I don't even drink usually."

"Trust me, I can tell you don't normally drink. But you didn't manage to finish your champagne in the club. And I knew you wanted that. And the rule is: birthday girl gets everything that she wants." He said winking at me. I involuntarily blushed.

"Thank you. For all of this..." He looked at me quite lovingly before he replied.

"There's nothing to thank me for, Elena. You deserve it."

He sat next to me on the blanket and for a while we sat in silence looking at the night's sky – which was absolutely beautiful tonight.

"I used to love astronomy." Damon stated out of the blue.

"Really?" I turned my head to witness his reply.

"You sound surprised."

"Ummm…" I actually felt embarassed.

"It's ok, I know I don't seem like **that** type of guy. It's a price you pay when you become an actor. Everybody assumes things about you just by looking at your face."

"That doesn't happen only when you're an actor. But…how did you get into astronomizing in the first place?"

"Oh, well... Rebekah was the one who loved looking at stars all night long when she was younger. She even made me buy a telescope and a book containing all the visible stars. We would go every two nights on the beach and watch the stars together." My eyebrows went up and my eyes were wide open in shock.

"Didn't expect that either, huh?" I shook my head in response.

"No, I didn't. She doesn't really seem keen to participate in any social activities, let alone family activities." That was harsh but true.

"That's true. Well, those were the good days... The days when she would actually latch onto me, never wanting me to let go of her. She used to be such a loving child…" I tried very hard to imagine cold Rebekah being that type of kid. It was immensely hard for me to do that.

"Why did she change so much?" I couldn't help but asking. I could see his reaction immediately. His grin disappeared and he started in a sad voice.

"She changed because of me." I had **not **expected that…

He kept looking away in the distance, deliberately avoiding my face. He seemed to be pondering about whether to talk about the whole thing or just drop it. I couldn't find it in me to apologize or keep him from opening up to me. I simply wanted and needed to get to know him better. To make him know that he could trust me...

"Two years before Katherine died, Rebekah started hating me. I could see it in her eyes, she would blame me for everything that was going wrong with her mother and me. Which was fairly right for her to do…" He stopped for a while and then turned his hands into balled fists.

"What do you think of me, Elena?" That took me off guard. "What do you truly think of me right now?" At first I didn't know what to say. But then I decided to be honest.

"I think you are an ambitious, hard-working and stubborn man." My sincere answer made his eyebrows go up in surprise. "But also a kind, generous and loving father…"

"Thank you. I don't deserve praise… But I do truly love my children. Which is why I hate myself, Elena."

"I don't understand…"

"You couldn't. This all happened years ago when you were probably no more than 17-18… But to get to that bit, you must know that I got married to my wife when I was only 19. Katherine and I, we used to be high-school sweethearts." That had been the first time he had mentioned Katherine like that. He seemed pained when talking about her. I was surprised that he was opening up like this.

"We looked good together, were happy and crazy, everybody envied us and we thought our relationship was unshakeable. That is, until one day in senior year when we found out that she was pregnant with Rebekah." My mouth fell wide open. He had caught my shameful reaction. I felt horrible for judging him.

"Yes, everybody basically had the same reaction. Including my father…who was planning on shipping me to Brown University to study Law just like he had done. My father, Giuseppe Salvatore, was part of a rich family who had royal Italian ancestors. A load of crap, if you ask me. Nevertheless, he was a very proud and conservative man, always pushing me and Stefan to work harder, build a mighty future for us, marry rich girls, etc. Stefan has never wanted to accept it but our father has always loved him more than me." No words...

"I'm sure that's not true." I firmly stated after a few seconds. He briefly laughed hearing my reply.

"Oh, trust me, Elena. It's always been like that. Because, you see, I take after my mother, God rest her soul." My heart ached hearing that his mother had passed away.

"And father has always considered me the weak, emotional one. Whereas Stefan is regarded as the golden boy of our family… He went to college, studied Law at Brown, came to work for him at his firm, got a rich girlfriend like Caroline. Stefan is basically everything that my father wanted me to be. And of course I disappointed him terribly. Got involved with a simple girl like Katherine, left her pregnant before we had even graduated high school... Completely ignored his wishes of getting rid of the baby – a bastard as he has always considered Rebekah – didn't go to Brown, instead attended the University of California Business School… Married Katherine and then left University to go into the film industry. And then I did what he hated most in the world : became an actor, which to him meant that I was a complete zero on a scale of one to ten. My poor mother, she tried to reason with him, she had always defended me in front of him. But she died of cancer when I was 16. And the only way I could step up in front of my father was to leave his house and start my own life. Katherine getting pregnant was the moment I had been waiting for to escape." He stopped and took a big sip of the champagne he had left.

"I'm sorry… It must have been really hard for you…" He sadly grinned.

"I got over it quite quickly. I was young, ambitious, I wanted to succeed on my own. And Katherine was an understanding wife who let me go after my dreams of becoming a successful actor. It was mostly her who kept me afloat when my life was falling to pieces. Because she loved me, despite her other flaws."

"What was she like?" His eyes changed before answering that question. His voice was sweet.

"She was kind and beautiful, a lot like you in that department…" I felt butterflies in my stomach when he said that. "She was also a very complicated woman, sometimes selfish and weak, a bit naïve as well. But I loved her, despite all of those things. She was, after all, the mother of my children."

"They all miss her, Damon…" He knew what I meant.

"Yes, I know they do… Trust me, I can see it every single day. The looks on their sweet little faces… I think Rebekah misses her the most, although she would never admit it. They've been pretty much lost without their mother. Her death affected them a lot." Her death had affected **him** a lot as well although he didn't state that.

"How did she die?" I knew it wasn't a nice thing to ask but curiosity got the best of me. Damon turned to look at me and then I could see all of the hurt in the world in his beautiful blue eyes.

"She killed herself, Elena…" My breath stopped in my chest.

"Oh my God…" I whispered.

"Indeed, I believe _oh my God _is the expression you were looking for. We all had that same reaction. Shock couldn't even begin to describe what we felt. The kids, apart from Rebekah, and the entire world all think it was an accident, that Katherine had just taken too many pills by mistake. But the rest of us - me, Caroline and Stefan - we know what truly happened. I would appreciate it if you didn't tell anyone about this. The only reason I'm telling you all of this is because I trust you can keep a secret."

"Of course." I immediately confirmed and he nodded shortly after. He seemed to keep on wanting to open up to me.

"Rebekah blames me for her mother's death. Told me I didn't make her mother happy enough, that I was the reason Katherine committed suicide. I can't say she's wrong, my daughter is partly right. But it wasn't only because of me… My wife was depressive, she had started having problems right after giving birth to Tyler. It started in a mellow fashion with temporary distress and worrying. I completely ruled out the possibility of depression, thinking it was just a female thing. But then it got worse and worse; and after we adopted Anna and John…" My mouth fell open again.

"I would appreciate it if you didn't tell anyone about that either." He said and smiled. I simply nodded.

"…After adopting them, Katherine simply became hysterical. The reason I had agreed to the adoption was to help her heal, she said she needed it, but it turned out to make things much worse. Which is when I quit acting and got a part-time job at my dad's firm… He unwillingly let me work for him after finding out about Katherine's situation. That way I could take care of my children and wife and still have a bit of normal life for myself. For a while things got better but after a year Katherine ended up at the psychiatrist suffering from severe depression. She started taking more and more pills until I couldn't even have a civil conversation with her." Damon took a handful of sand and let it fall between his fingers.

"One day I exploded and threatened to get a divorce if she didn't at least try to recover and come back to normal. She started crying and shouting horrible things at me and I lost my temper and lashed out to hit her. But I stopped at the last minute. However Rebekah witnessed all of that... Instead of staying I ran away from the house and came back three hours later after I had cooled down. I remember it even now – it was like it happened yesterday. My wife lying on the floor in our bedroom; her body cold; her eyes still open, facing the ceiling… The ambulance coming, Rebekah coming in and crying so much until she couldn't even stand up straight… Papparazzi coming in large numbers outside our house, stalking us for days in a row even after the funeral… But it passed. It's been 9 months ever since…" His voice came to an abrupt stop.

"Are you ok, Damon?" I couldn't help but squeeze his hand tightly into mine after everything that he had said.

I could see a tear coming down his cheek and right then and there I could see Damon Salvatore's soul unfolding in front of me. He was so genuine, so much better than all of the movie roles he had played, such a kind and hurt man that… I couldn't help but reach out and hug him tightly. He seemed surprised at first but then he welcomed the proximity and relaxed in my arms. We sat there for a while, him completely quiet and me so confused, thinking about everything he had told me; I couldn't believe all of the things that had happened to him. After a while, I gently let go of him. He gratefully smiled.

"Rebekah hates me… My only regret after everything that's happened is that my own daughter hates me. And has been punishing me ever since her mother died." I felt I could slap that little cold child for the way she had been torturing her own father. But then I understood her more than anyone could. And I felt so guilty - probably the same way Rebekah felt.

"I doubt she hates you, Damon… You're her father. No child truly hates their parents." He looked me in the eye and I could see him searching something in my eyes as well.

"Why are you so sure of that? How can you know?"

He seemed desperate to receive an answer that would ease his suffering. For a brief second I wondered if it would be worth pouring my soul to him like I was about to. If he would keep my secret, if he would never use it against me… That was what I feared the most, that he would betray me somehow, make me suffer for opening up in fron of him. But then seeing his kind blue eyes, remembering how sweet and caring he had been with me, I decided it was time to tell him the truth.

"I know because I went through that as well…" Damon's eyebrows furrowed and he looked at me in a strange way.

"I don't understand, Elena…"

"I know what Rebekah is going through because I went through something similar when I was about her age…"

"Your mother died…" He weakly stated looking sorry for me. I couldn't bare looking him in the eyes anymore.

"No…she didn't." I stated in an empty voice as I watched the waves in the ocean.

I could feel the tears gathering in my eyes. This entire night had made me remember everything that my life had been. I just had to tell someone the whole story – at least when it came to my family. I couldn't hold it in anymore. I could feel Damon's hand encircling mine, supporting me, telling me I wasn't alone in this, that he was there, that he understood me. That moment gave me the strength to say something nobody else had ever heard being uttered by my mouth.

"My mother abandoned my father, my younger brother and me when I was only 10... It's been 11 years and I haven't seen or heard of her ever since…" Damon was looking at me, more shocked than ever. He didn't know what to say to soothe my pain. I couldn't blame him. Who could really say something to make the past 11 years go away?

I slowly got up, making him let go of my hand and walked towards the ocean. Before reaching the water I kneeled on the sand and covered my face with my hands. I struggled not to cry but then when everything got too much to bear I heard myself shrieking and wailing so badly that I thought my heart was going to break to pieces. I was weeping, sorrowing after my mother, who had left me to face this whole world alone at such a fragile age. My mother - who didn't care enough about me or my brother to stay with us. My mother - who had been the first person to break my heart…

After a few seconds I felt two strong arms gently embracing me while I kept crying. I couldn't open my eyes to look at Damon. There was no need for _thank you_ or any other words for that matter. It was all unspoken… I simply knew he was there, not letting go… taking care of me and making sure I was safe and sound in his arms…

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**_Guys, I cannot wait to see what you think of this chapter! I wasn't sure you would like something like this - this kind of closeness, this kind of conversation... So please review and let me know your thoughts about it! Until next time! :)_**


	13. Chapter 13 Paradise

_**Author's note: Hello, everybody! Thank you for your patience! I've uploaded yet another chapter i.e. chapter 13, its title is inspired by Coldplay's song "Paradise". I'm getting really excited about the story because it's getting really interesting, in my opinion… And I can't wait to write the next chapter when you will start getting surprising twists in the story. Thank you so much for all your encouraging reviews so far – they are the ones that keep me going on with this story! I hope you'll enjoy this chapter as well! **_

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**CHAPTER 13 - PARADISE**

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**DAMON's POV**

For how long had I been holding her in my arms? Stroking her soft brown hair? Wiping the tears off her hot cheeks? I couldn't say… It might have been minutes or even hours since I saw her helplessly collapse on the beach and start crying.

If I ever thought that Elena Gilbert didn't care about her past or her family, then I was definitely wrong. Seeing her in this state- wailing for her mother- pained me deeply. For it was like watching Rebekah grieving her mother over and over again. I kept replaying that memory in my head until I didn't know who I was holding in my hands – my daughter or my children's nanny?

I had so many questions in my head, so many things I wanted to know about Elena… Even after she stopped crying I was struggling. Part of me wanted to ask questions and find out more about her life; the other half was calling me an idiot, telling me to respect this broken girl. I winced at the thought of the word _broken_. It reminded me of how I often used this word to describe Katherine. Just a broken girl… The difference was that Katherine had had a happy childhood whilst Elena clearly hadn't.

Just when I thought she had fallen asleep, Elena slowly turned around to look me in the eyes. I could see the white trails left by her continuous fall of tears, and her empty doe eyes.

"Thank you for all of that…" She gently whispered, seeming embarrassed by her outburst.

"You have nothing to thank me for, Elena." She smiled and then moved to sit next to me on the sand.

"I bet you're wondering what my **whole** story is…" She said whilst watching the waves. _Was I that easy to read?_

"You are in no way obliged to tell me anything about your personal life." I meant it. Funny enough, I never denied wanting to know.

"What if I **wanted** to tell you?" She looked into my eyes expecting me to say yes.

"Then I would have no problem with it." I was surprised to say the least.

"I trust you." That was a flat statement coming from her. She seemed confused…

"I don't know why… but I do."

"I trust you as well, Elena." I said and involuntarily took her hand into mine. A long pause came from her end whilst she was examining my face, trying to make out what I felt for her. At least that was what I felt she was doing… She suddenly bit her lip and I realized she was struggling to start talking.

"I miss it…" She bluntly stated.

"…I miss being a child…having no care in the world. Waking up in the morning, running to my parents' room, having breakfast in bed with them and Jeremy…" She seemed like she was going to break down again.

"Elena, you don't need to make yourself go through all of this again for my sake…" She laughed.

"Don't worry, this is actually one of the good memories… Damon…don't worry about me. I've accepted what happened a long time ago." Her voice was defeated. I felt the need to reply.

"There is no other way out, is there? In life, you just have to accept things and move on." She nodded.

"That is exactly what I did…"

"Elena... What happened to you tonight? Why were you so sad?"

"It's a long story… I would need to tell you a lot of things that happened in my past before explaining tonight…"

"I have all the time in the world." I encouraged her. After a few seconds she started speaking…

"You know that I once said my family lived in Mayfield?"

"I remember."

"That was partially a lie... My name is actually Elena Brigitte Gerber and… I have triple citizenship – German, Spanish and American." I felt my eyebrows furrowing at hearing those words coming out of her mouth.

"Don't tell me you work for agent 007." She laughed so badly hearing my reply.

"No, not all… My younger brother Jeremy and I were born in Dusseldorf, Germany. That is where we spent most of our childhood. My father, a German citizen, married my mother, who came from Spain, one year before I was born. My dad worked as an electrical engineer in a car factory and my mother taught dance lessons at an Arts Institute. We were, as you would say, a very middle-class family. Not poor but in no way rich. None of us cared though… we were so happy together."

Elena was smiling whilst remembering those once-good days in her life.

"Jeremy would learn so many things about cars from dad whilst I would always dance with my mum around the house. Mother was the best dancer ever – so beautiful and graceful… I inherited my passion for dancing from her… It was our little world of cha-cha, samba, tango, salsa… She took so good care of us all the time since she worked only part-time; my dad worked 12 hours every day, never had much time for us. I didn't see it coming…" I realized she was talking about her mum leaving.

"I always saw them as the perfect couple – unshakeable… Capable of withstanding everything that life would throw at them. They were either truly happy or they were pretty good actors in front of us kids. It turned out to be that my mum couldn't take it anymore. One day, when I was 10, I remember coming back from school with my brother and finding the house empty. No sign of mum, or any of her clothes in the wardrobe… No note, no goodbye, nothing… She left us with nothing…" I could notice Elena was so still, as if she was trying not to lose her calm by moving.

"We received only one sign from her – one day when she left a message on the phone saying that she was sorry but that she couldn't take her life anymore. I couldn't understand why she had abandoned us all. I searched and searched for an answer until I concluded that my dad was responsible for mum leaving us. He was very different from my mum – he had that cold German attitude, so focused on his work, so distant from us all sometimes. Whereas my mother was the opposite – warm, always with a smile on her face, singing and laughing all day long. I think she couldn't stand living with such a person like dad. Nonetheless, I never found the answer to why she left us." She was talking faster now.

"I refused to think about her. But nightmares of her would keep me up at night, making me blame my father more and more for her departure... I ended up resenting dad and pushing him away. I refused to listen to him and started doing everything I could to piss him off. When I was 13 I turned emo, always wore black clothes, listened to heavy metal, made friends with strange, fucked-up people. But then again, I was pretty fucked-up myself…"

"It's hard for me to imagine you as an emo, Elena…" I involuntarily giggled. She smiled in response.

"Oh, trust me, I looked and felt ridiculous. But at least I could hide my pain and frustrations underneath the whole black make-up and clothes. I had gone mental at a certain point. At the age of 14 I was coming back home after midnight and my father would have to punish me for all the crap I was doing to him. But I simply ignored him, he couldn't really control me. The strange part was that I still went to school and was a good pupil but when it came to my dad, I just made him go crazy. On purpose…" She regretted it, I could tell.

"If it helps, I kind of did the same to my dad." I said and devilishly smiled.

"I doubt it was as bad as me… When I turned 15 I went out with my mates and pierced my bellybutton at a cheap store at the edge of the city. Came back home with a short T-shirt, revealing my work of art… That was when dad lost it. It was the first and last time that my father slapped me. We shouted horrible things at each other and I went to bed crying. The next day dad drove me to the hospital because my pierce got infected, making me crazy because of the pain. That was when I realized that I had lost it completely. Before I could apologize to my dad, he decided that enough was enough. The next thing I knew the three of us were on a plane to New York where my uncle John was waiting for us."

"**That** was how you actually moved to the USA?" I asked in surprise.

"Pretty much… That was how we ended up in Mayfield. And we changed our family name into Gilbert so that we would fit in more easily. Dad was right to move though. But I still feel guilty – he had to leave his job and his home just to make sure I would start over new. Jeremy had always been the good kid, the one that behaved. **I** was the rebel… But dad ultimately did a good job with me. At least made me conscious that there was definitely a life after mum… I was happier in Mayfield, I went back to who I was as a child. Started wearing colorful clothes again, no more make-up, attended Judo classes again for a while, took up cheerleading as well. Made decent good friends and met Matt, the captain of the football team, who ended up being my boyfriend." I involuntarily winced at hearing about a boy in her life. But who was I kidding? She was so beautiful – anyone would want her as a girlfriend.

"After moving in the USA I left behind everything that represented my other life. I started fresh, decided I wanted to study Biology at Columbia University and kept working for my dream. The best part was that I finally got along with my father and brother, getting really close to them. It felt like we were a family, although dad never remarried. It was all going so well, Damon… I had so much faith that my life would be better. And it was good – until one God-forsaken night..." She swallowed hard trying to get enough courage to put it into words…

"It was the evening before my 18th birthday…" I caught my breath as I imagined what was coming.

"Matt and I had gone out partying in the only club that Mayfield had. Celebrated both of us getting into college with our other colleagues… We drank a bit too much and forgot to call my dad to pick us up as I had promised to, since he was so protective of me. At around 2 a.m. I got a call from the sheriff – the worst call of my life." Her voice broke…

"My father and brother had apparently left the house together to come and pick me up. And on the way to the club they had an accident. On Wickery bridge… Car drove off the bridge and landed into the river. Neither survived… The police found my dad without his seatbelt and with the car door open; and were surprised that he hadn't escaped. But I knew what dad was trying to do – he wanted to save Jeremy… And he just couldn't find it in him to leave my brother alone down there. He didn't choose to die, but he couldn't have lived with himself if he hadn't tried to free Jeremy." Silence on my behalf.

"I can't blame my dad for leaving me alone in the world. He did the right thing trying to help my brother. I just wish he had succeeded..." She said looking into my eyes with a pained expression.

"I'm sorry. I didn't know your birthday was…"

"A day to mourn?" She cut in seemingly ok with the subject.

"I guess you could put it that way… I wouldn't have taken you out had I known." She feverishly shook her head.

"It's not your fault. This is the first time in three years that I've celebrated my birthday…" That reply made me feel sorry for her.

"Do you regret going out?" She measured her words before firmly answering.

"No. Because I know that my dad wouldn't have wanted me never to celebrate my birthday again. He would have wanted me to be happy." After a short pause I gently grabbed her hand.

"And are you happy?" I lovingly asked.

"I'm trying to..." She sadly said.

"You won't be sad forever." I encouraged her by squeezing her hand in mine.

"I'm so sorry for everything that happened to you, Elena…" She looked at me surprised, a million questions behind her beautiful brown eyes.

"Thank you. It was a long time ago… At least, it feels like it." She let go of my hand to my disappointment.

"Can I ask you something, Elena?"

"Of course." She answered staring at the ocean again.

"Did you give up on college after that unfortunate incident?"

"I did. But not because of grief or pain… I had no money left to go to college. My uncle John had all of dad's savings for me at the bank he was working for in New York. After dad's funeral, my uncle refused to give me any cent; he declared that father owed him money and that he was simply getting his loan back. Because dad never left a will and I had no right to the savings'deposit, there was nothing I could do." I shook my head in astonishment.

"I can't believe your own uncle did that to you." Elena sadly smiled.

"We weren't close. Plus, uncle John has always been the cheap Gilbert… No surprise there." I was so surprised how serene she was when talking about all this. Elena really seemed to have accepted all of the bad things in her life.

"Is that how you ended up working for Mrs. Dobbs?"

"Yeah, that's the story. And three years later here I am sitting on the beach next to Damon Salvatore of all people… I can't even believe it." She said shaking her head and laughing.

"Life truly is crazy, isn't it?"

"Yes, it really is."

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The car clock displayed the very late time of 3.30 a.m. That was when Elena and I had just got in the car and left the beach. I would have stayed even longer, however Elena seemed quite tired. I on the other hand had slept a good 8 hours on the plane from London. Nonetheless, although the kids were safe with Jenna and Elijah in the house, I wanted to make sure that they were all tucked in bed, sleeping. I had become very protective of them since Katherine had died.

Elena was looking out the car window, admiring the city that was buzzing even at such a late hour in the night. I couldn't tale my eyes off her beautiful face. I felt like such an idiot just staring at her every time we had to stop at the traffic lights. I didn't care though, she was a sight for sore eyes.

"So, tell me, Elena… are you still unhappy about your job?" I asked truly surprising her.

"Why do you ask me that, Damon?" Argh, I loved how she pronounced my name.

"Well, if I recall correctly, this beautiful girl that I met on a warm May night on the beach told me that she wasn't sure about her new glamorous job…" I could tell Elena was blushing at hearing my words.

"I was never **unhappy**. I was just lost a bit in the beginning… It's been tough adapting to a life like this." Yes, indeed, L.A. wasn't an easy place to adapt to.

"I think you've done a great job with my children…" She seemed sad for some reason.

"Apart from Rebekah…"

"Yes, well, Rebekah has always been an exception…Tell me, Elena… Did anything happen between the two of you after I left?" She seemed extremely startled by my question.

"Why do you ask?" Something clearly had happened.

"Because she didn't even look at you tonight… Which is not how she usually behaves with you." She seemed to think about her options.

"I got into a fight with her." She flatly stated. It didn't surprise me.

"How come?" I felt like teasing her about it.

"I told her she shouldn't behave like that with you… Right after you left…" And then it hit me. Wow… She had shamed Rebekah for behaving badly with me?

"I don't get it… Why did you even bother? She's not going to change, Elena…"

"She will. I have faith in her." It was her turn again to surprise me.

"I was just like her, Damon… Did the same horrible things, and even worse, to my father. But I never truly hated him. I just took it out on someone. And that someone was dad… She loves you a lot. Just doesn't know how to express it."

We had reached home already. I stopped the car in front of the house, not bothering to park it back in the garage. We got out, slowly walking towards the front door.

"You have more faith in her than I do." I sadly stated.

"Of course I do. She's just a kid."

"Guess I've just given up trying..."

"No, you haven't… I've seen you with her. You're the only one she truly listens to."

"Out of fear."

"Maybe… but you're the **only one** she listens to. That says something." I looked at Elena with admiration.

"I guess you're right…"

"I **know **I'm right about this." She was truly something.

"How can you be so sure?" I asked, bewildered.

"Because Rebekah is just like I used to be. And if I could get over it, then she can as well…"

"I hope that you're right about this, Elena… I don't know what to do with her. I've tried to talk to her so many times, make her see that there is a life after Katherine…" We had stopped in front of the front door and it seemed like neither of us wanted to go in. She was waiting for me to continue.

"But everything I try, everything I do…. They're just failed and feeble attempts of doing the right thing." Elena had an expression on her face that screamed pity. She felt sorry for me.

I quickly took my coat off and put it on her shoulders when I saw her trembling because of the cold morning breeze. She seemed puzzled, surprised, nervous because of my proximity.

"Thank you." She timidly said. I nodded and took two steps back.

"You know, ever since my marriage started falling apart, I've always driven my kids away from me, one way or the other. Treated them in a distant rough way, just like my father had done with me and Stefan… But since Katherine died, I've found myself wanting to spoil them, love them, protect them… How has that happened?" I felt my eyebrows furrowing as I asked that question. Elena seemed confused, didn't quite know what to reply.

"They look up to you, Damon… I've seen how Anna feels about you. You are their knight in shining armor. Although not all of them would openly admit it..." I feverishly shook my head, rejecting that idea immediately. She didn't know me at all if she thought that about me. She hadn't seen my inner demons yet.

"No, I'm not a hero, Elena… I don't do good, it's not in me."

"I think it is…" She said, smiling to encourage me. She was an angel, whilst I was a devil.

"No, that's reserved for my brother…and you…and Rebekah; although she doesn't know it yet…Even if she has every reason to hate me, Rebekah still loves me, I could see it in her eyes tonight when she came and hugged me so lovingly…"

"Why do you sound so surprised?!" Elena clearly didn't understand. She looked like such a child, keeping hold of my big black coat that was hanging over her shoulders covering her beautiful slim figure from my hungry stare.

"Rebekah changed her feelings for me because of you. Because of that fight you had with her after I left…" Elena seemed reduced to silence as she processed that information.

"Which means that somewhere along the way you decided I was worth saving when it comes to my children… And I wanted to thank you for that." I involuntarily got closer to Elena's body as I talked.

"You're welcome, Damon…" She said and warmly smiled at me.

I couldn't control myself. I had thousands of voices shouting in my head, telling me not to do this, but I chose to ignore them all. Either that, or my desire to feel her warm skin against my lips was too much to bear. I slowly got closer to her face and planted a small, timid kiss on her right cheek. Elena's skin and hair smelled like cherries – such a beautiful flavor that I felt myself being drawn to her even more than I usually was.

As I drew my face away from Elena's I could see something inside of her come to life. Her eyes were glowing, and there was this fire burning in them that I hadn't seen since I met her. She was struggling to form words and even to breath; it was clear that she thought this was all wrong. I was sure of her feelings since she had voiced them earlier after we went out of the club. _"__It's not appropriate – what we're doing… how we danced inside. I can't deal with this now, Damon."_

I felt my hands cup her face from both sides and slowly pulling her lips towards mine. What was wrong with me? I couldn't understand how my feelings and desire for her could be so intense that I completely ignored her wishes. She clearly didn't want this – and who could blame her? I was her boss, she was working for me. She had gone through so much misery in her life that she just wanted a simple life here with us… And with every ticking second, I was complicating it for her. But I never felt her pulling away from me. If she had given me even the slightest clue that she resented me, disliked me, was disgusted by me, maybe I would have let her go.

But her eyes told a completely different story. I could feel the blood in her veins pumping so fast against my hands on her neck, her irregular breathing… I found myself closing the space between us and gently capturing her upper lip between mine whilst she simply melted in my arms. God, Elena tasted so heavenly… I couldn't even describe it – her scent was intoxicating. I couldn't help but kiss her over and over again as she buried herself even more in my arms. She wanted this just as much I did, I could feel it in the way she responded to my kiss… I thought I was dreaming…

And then I realized I wasn't dreaming as I heard the front door opening. Elena jumped as far away from me as she could, shocked by seeing Jenna of all people staring back at us. I was fairly hurt by the way she acted, but couldn't really blame her. Awkward isn't a good enough word to describe the embarrassment that was written on all of our faces. Elena couldn't utter a word, I didn't even know what I could say to change the subject whilst Jenna seemed sorry to have opened the door in the first place. In the end, though, Jenna proved to be the courageous one.

"Damon, you have to come in as quickly as possible." The urgency in her voice startled me deeply.

"What happened?"

"It's Tyler; he has fever and has been throwing up for an hour now."

"Why didn't you call me Jenna?!" I was getting angry by the second. And Jenna knew me well.

"You didn't pick up, Damon… I tried calling you ten times." I took the phone out of my pocket. Dead.

"Damn it! I'll take him to the hospital – right now."

* * *

Three hours later I was on the hospital hallway. The doctor had just informed me that Tyler was going to be fine. He had just caught a virus but they were going to inject him with antibiotics for a few days. He had to stay in the hospital for a while but at least he would be taken care of. Thank God. I was so panicked that I didn't know how to help him. Felt so useless as usual.

It was good having Elena next to me though. Jenna had to stay home with the other kids and plus it would have been embarrassing as hell bringing her to the hospital with me after having seen Elena and me kiss. So Elena accompanied us instead. I don't know what I would've done if she hadn't been there with me. She was so good with Tyler, holding him in the car while he threw up continuously, poor kid; whispering soothing words in his ears. Elena was made to be a mother, just by the way she could handle such a situation. I was crap at all of this. Katherine would always handle stuff like this. Guess I had to start learning how to deal with it.

But it was truly a blessing to have Elena with me. She had such a calming effect on me, reassuring me that it was going to be fine. As I saw her walking towards me with a double latte I remembered all about our kiss. Not that I could ever forget anything like that. She hadn't said anything about it, but I could feel a sort of awkwardness between us. I realized that I had to talk to her about this. As she sat next to me and passed me the latte I couldn't help but admire her again.

"Thank you, Elena. For everything…"

"You have nothing to thank me for. Just doing my job." I knew she didn't mean that though.

"You're not just doing your job. You care about them all. More than a regular nanny would." She smiled.

"It's hard **not to** get attached to them."

"I know this is probably the last thing that you want to do right now, but… we should talk about what happened tonight." Her cheeks instantly turned pink.

"I don't think there's much to talk about."

"Why would you say that?" I was confused.

"Look, Damon, we were both tired and I think a bit drunk when it happened." She didn't even utter the word "kiss".

"We're both to blame for it and I think we should just forget all about it. I don't want to hurt your feelings but it was a mistake… That's all it was." I felt something inside me getting crushed.

"A mistake…" I said, completely taken aback by her words. She seemed sorry for what she had said.

"I'm really sorry but that's what I think it was. I don't want to ruin what I have here, Damon. I like my job, I enjoy living in L.A., and I love your kids. I really do. And I can't afford to throw all of that away because we made a mistake after drinking a whole bottle of champagne on the beach." So that's how she felt.

"I understand. I apologize for my actions tonight. You don't have to stay any longer, you should go back home and sleep, it's been probably 24 hours since you last slept." She seemed confused by my cold answer.

"No, I can stay." She wanted to stay.

"Trust me, you should go home. I'll ring Elijah to come pick you up."

"Damon…"

"That's final." I could hear so much coldness in my words. But I didn't really care. If that's the way she felt about me, she didn't deserve more from me.

* * *

_One month later…_

**ELENA's POV**

I was sitting on my bed, reading my favorite book – Pride and Prejudice – yet again. It was a beautiful Saturday morning. I usually had to work on Saturdays but not this one. Damon had given me the day off. Said I needed a weekend just for myself. He was right although I would never admit it. Plus, I didn't want to have to spend time with him. Things had been extremely awkward between us since the night we kissed.

That kiss… I closed my eyes as I remembered his sweet soft lips brushing against mine. Butterflies filled my stomach and I thought I was going to punch myself for rejecting him. What was wrong with me? I liked him so much… But that was the problem. He was my boss and I couldn't get involved with a man who was 10 years older than me, a famous person and already had four kids with another woman. It just didn't seem right, especially since I was taking care of his kids. So I kept blocking our kiss out of my head as much as I could.

But still, my words had hurt him, I could tell. And he had been avoiding me ever since; but then again, I had done the exact same thing… I was actually happy to be in my room today. Alone, away from him… Just me and my book. I was startled to hear somebody knocking on my door.

"It's open!" I shouted.

The door slowly opened and I was shocked to see Rebekah of all people standing there. My mouth fell open and I could tell she felt embarrassed and weird about this as well. She had never before knocked on my door willingly. She started in a demanding voice, trying to cover up her awkwardness.

"Well, aren't you going to invite me in?!" I let go of my book.

"Of course I am. Please come in!" She closed the door and came to stand in front of me as I sat on the bed.

"Can I help you with anything?" Things had been awkward between us as well but since her birthday party she had at least started saying hi to me.

"I need to ask you a favor." She clearly didn't enjoy saying this.

"Umm, ok…" I reluctantly replied.

"I wouldn't normally come to you…" Oh, I **knew** that…

"…but school is starting again in two weeks' time and this year we have a freshmen's ball."

"Oh…that sounds nice!" I cheerfully replied.

"Yeah, well, it's not really my thing… but I have to go, everybody is obliged to…"

"I'm sure you'll have fun with your friends." She chose to ignore my comment.

"Anyway… I have nothing to wear. And I need to buy a dress."

"Oh, I understand. You want me to come with you? Help you choose a dress?"

"I don't need help choosing a dress…" Her tone mellowed down afterwards though. She was really trying to make an effort.

"But father wouldn't let me go alone to a mall. So… I need someone to supervise me unfortunately."

"Rebekah, you know you could ask Caroline if you didn't want me to come with you."

"Aunt Caroline is too out of this world for me. I prefer you. At least you don't seem to wear as much pink as she does…" Rebekah stated wrinkling her nose at saying the word _pink_. I had to contain a giggle.

"Sure… I'd love to do that. When do you wanna go?"

"Do you mind if we go today?"

"Oh, umm… no, I don't. Is two hours from now ok for you?"

"Yes." She stated and then seemed confused as to whether she should ask me something or not.

"Elena, I have something else to ask you. I know we don't really get along but… can you please not tell father about taking me out? He doesn't like it when I go out in public." Confused much?

"Why is that?"

"Paparazzi and all… He's obsessed about that. Thinks we're the only family in the world that they would go after. A load of crap if you ask me." Oh...

"Rebekah, I don't know if that's such a good idea… going out without asking for his permission." She almost screamed after that.

"I'm 12! And you're an adult – I'm safe with you."

"Although I am truly flattered that you trust me, I don't think I should go behind your father's back. Knowing him, he wouldn't like that at all."

"So you're on his side, aren't you?!" Her voice was demanding and cold.

I could see how much she resented her father for keeping her locked in the house. She never really could have a normal life, could she? Losing her mother and not being able to take one wrong step otherwise the whole media would know and exploit it… I at least had the luxury of being who I wanted to be and doing what I wanted without the world really caring… Rebekah didn't.

"I'm not on his side, honey. I just don't want anything happening to you. I know nothing about a celebrity's life, about paparazzi… I wouldn't know how to handle something like that."

"Nothing's going to happen. Stop being a woose!" Oh, God...

"Rebekah, I'd love to go out with you, I honestly would but please understand…"

"Forget it. I shouldn't have asked you in the first place!" With that she ran out of my room and slammed the door. Great, now I had really missed my chance to bond with her.

After that incident I felt the need to drink some hot chocolate to cheer me up. But while I was boiling some water, Damon of all people came in the kitchen.

"Hey there." He unwillingly said.

"Hi!" I cheerfully replied.

"So, how's your Saturday off going?" He asked focusing on getting some juice out of the fridge.

"Pretty well." That was clearly and overstatement but he didn't seem to notice.

"Good for you." He still wasn't looking me in the eye.

"And how is your Saturday?"

"Oh, it's fine, I need to leave in 10, have to meet up with Stefan to talk about some company problems."

"Is everything ok?"

"Oh, yes, nothing to worry about. Just the monthly check-up."

"I see…" I awkwardly said as I put some cocoa powder in my cup.

"Damon…" I involuntarily said. I couldn't stop from asking him.

"Yes?" He nonchalantly answered looking at me for the first time.

"How are you doing?" He could tell it wasn't just another polite question.

"Great, Elena… walking on sunshine. Thanks for asking" He had his sarcastic tone.

"Damon…"

"Elena…" He threw me a cold look.

"We should be able to talk about this, we're close enough now… I really wanna know how you're doing." He seemed to be sincere the moment he answered.

"I kissed you, you kissed me back… Didn't even imagine that you would consider it such a big mistake… How do you think I'm doing?!" I was so confused. Was he really hoping for more after that kiss? No, his ego was just probably shaken because of my rejection.

"I think that you're hurt."

"Noooo, I don't get hurt, Elena…" Again, that sarcastic voice… I felt more confident than ever.

"No, you don't admit that you get hurt. You get angry and cover it up and then you do something stupid." Where was all of this even coming from?

"You're scared." He firmly said surprising me.

"You think that saying no to me will drive me up the deep end. I don't need **you** for that." Ouch...There was so much hurt behind his words… He walked past me but then turned around before exiting the kitchen.

"Tell me something, why was it such a surprise that I kissed you that night?"

"That wasn't a surprise… I'm surprised you thought I'd agree to share more than that with you…" He knew what I meant – having a relationship with him, or even having feelings for him. That had struck home base. His expression morphed into an impenetrable mask.

"Now I'm hurt…" I couldn't be able to form words although I desperately wanted to take all of that back. I was such a liar. But at least it had worked. I was driving him away from me. Good… That was exactly what I had wanted to do from the beginning.

But if I really wanted to drive him away, why did it hurt so much to see him being so miserable because of me? Rigth there and then I decided something. My life would be hell in this house if I drove both Damon and Rebekah away from me. I couldn't afford to keep him close to me because of my feelings for him. But I really wanted to bond with Rebekah. Which is why I took a drastic decision. Seconds later I was knocking on Rebekah's door. When she answered she seemed really pissed off.

"What?!"

"I've changed my mind. We're going out today... Get ready, in one hour we're leaving." I replied.

"Wait, why did you change your mind?" She was confused.

"Does it matter?" She thought about it.

"Not really. Fine, see you in one hour." And with that she closed her door.

As I was going back to my room I realized that getting along with one out of two people was good enough for me. Especially if it meant that Rebekah would stop giving me such a hard time. I just hoped that if I was caught, Damon wouldn't hate me for it. I was playing with fire and there was a big possibility that I would get burnt.

* * *

_**So, what did you think of it guys? Please review and let your opinions be known? What would you like to see in the future? I already have a storyline planned but I could insert other things as well if you guys wanted it… So, please review! Until next time! (:**_


	14. Chapter 14 Holding on and letting go

_**Hey guys! I apologize for posting so late after my last chapter. It wasn't about lack of inspiration - only lack of time. Second year of uni has taken its toll on my life. Either way, hope you forgive me for my long break and hope you'll enjoy this chapter; the title is inspired by Ross Copperman's song "Holding on and letting go". **_

* * *

**CHAPTER 14 – HOLDING ON AND LETTING GO**

* * *

**ELENA's POV  
**

I couldn't believe what I was doing. Had I literally gone mad today? I was in Elijah's car with Rebekah on the back seat getting closer and closer to Rodeo Drive. Yes, that is exactly what Rebekah requested – to go shopping on Rodeo Drive in Beverly Hills out of all places. I must say, she did have high-class tastes if she wanted to shop in such an expensive place. But then again, if she could afford it, then I didn't mind. I was actually going to have fun with her, I could feel it.

But I did feel like I was losing my mind. How could I have snuck Rebekah out of that house like that? I simply told Elijah and Jenna that we were going out for a drive and that we would be back in about two hours… They didn't really suspect anything – not kind, naïve Jenna and polite, sincere Elijah. I bet they didn't even imagine that I hadn't told Mr. Salvatore. That was basically lying to him. And if I didn't get back before he came home from his meeting with Stefan, I would basically be fried. I felt my conscious starting to scream at myself, condemning me for basically kidnapping Rebekah. But then again, she had wanted this, didn't she? She had come to me and begged me to go out with her. All in all, I knew that Damon wouldn't give a shit about that. He would blame **me** and for good reason…

Just as I was parking the car, I realized Rebekah was looking at me through the mirror. She seemed worried about me – an emotion I had never seen on Rebekah's face until now.

"Are you ok?" She reluctantly asked. It took me a second to concentrate on what she said.

"Yeah… Don't worry, I'm fine." I said but then right as I tried to get out of the car I miscalculated the height of the car and hit my head pretty badly against the roof.

"Ow!" I involuntarily squeaked. Reebekah quickly came out of the car and put her hand on my shoulder.

"You're **not** ok, are you?" She demandingly asked.

"Well, right now, I'm definitely not…" I said and smiled whilst rubbing my head.

"Elena?"

"Yes?" I asked whilst getting out of the car.

"Don't worry, nothing's gonna happen. Dad won't catch us." God, she had figured it out… She was just like her father, wasn't she?

"How do you even know?!" I couldn't help but ask.

"Because you're just a goody-two-shoes. And I know how your mind works…" She said sounding like an old lady. I couldn't help but giggle.

"Fair enough… You are right though, so you get extra points for that." Rebekah looked slightly impatient but was fighting against that feeling.

"Shall we go now? Or are you not feeling well?"

"No, I'm good. Let's go shopping!"

Two hours later, after going through ten different shops and trying on tens of dresses, I was sitting in the VIP changing rooms of xxx. Without even a shadow of a doubt, Rebekah was the most indecisive person ever! Even I couldn't top that and I was pretty indecisive when it came to clothes. I was getting more and more impatient and after seeing another set of 5 dresses getting sent back by her, I completely lost it and took my cell out of my bag. I dialed as quickly as I could, hoping I wasn't too late.

"Yes?" I was so relieved he hadn't pronounced my name.

"Stefan, this is an emergency. Please, whatever you do, don't seem panicked or say my name out loud! I'm begging you…"

"Ok." Stefan said after a short pause.

"I'm sorry for dragging you into this but I need your help. Otherwise Damon will kill me." That seemed to have caught his attention.

"I'm hearing you…" He was clearly with Damon.

"Is he still there with you?"

"Yes."

"Can you keep him busy for another hour and a half?"

"I think so. Why?"

"I took Rebekah out shopping without asking for his approval. And we're running late. And I fear that if he catches us, I'll be jobless tomorrow."

"Hold on a bit…" _I'll be right back, Damon._

_Oh, come on, Stefan, we're already late with this report. Just fuck them! _

_It's something important._

_Oh… is that your girlfriend? _

_Just shut up, you prick! _After a few seconds I heard a door closing and then Stefan's voice was normal.

"How come you did that Elena?" He seemed upset.

"She wanted me to take her out. And it's the first time in four months that she's asked me a favour. You know what she's like…"

"Yeah, I know what she's like…" He seemed to understand.

"Please help me out, Stefan! I know you hate lying, especially to Damon, but I… I just wanted to bond with her."

"Ok, Elena, don't worry. I'll try to get you two hours."

"Thank you so much, Stefan! I owe you…"

"It's cool. Just don't ever do that again please!"

"Don't worry, I won't…" He closed the phone right after that. I really did owe him…

Just as I felt like screaming because Rebekah couldn't make up her mind I saw her coming out of the changing room carrying the most upset face in the world.

"I'm never going to find a dress for the ball!" She was basically about to start crying. For once in her life, Rebekah seemed desperate. She collapsed to the floor, not caring that I was looking at her with shocked eyes. Before she could say anything I kneeled in front of her holding her hands tightly. She was accepting my proximity, actually welcoming it for the first time.

"Mum was always good at picking out dresses… She knew everything I liked, whatever I felt and when I felt it…" To my shock, Rebekah started weeping. And squeezing my hand harder and harder...

"She was good at everything… We all loved her… I don't understand…" And then she started saying something over and over again but I couldn't make out her message as she had buried her face in my arm.

When I realized what she was saying, a cold shiver went right up my spine, making my skin turn into goose bumps. I grabbed the poor child and tucked her in my arms in the protective way I had always craved to be held. Over and over again, her little speech reminded me of many painful and cold nights when I kept saying the same thing. Over and over again until I would hate myself less and my mother more and more…

_Why did she leave me?_

* * *

The waitress gave us both a huge grin as she put the two glasses full of ice-cream in front of us on the table. I thanked her by smiling back however Rebekah kept avoiding everybody's stare. I couldn't blame her, poor child… After the breakdown she had experienced earlier in the store she didn't even want to get out of the changing room. After a few soothing words and suggestions of getting ice-cream she finally caved. As the waitress left I feared the silence that would come.

"Well, these look delicious don't they?" No answer from her.

"We should probably dig in before they get a chance to melt." Rebekah kept circling her spoon in the ice-cream, not really listening to what I was saying. She was in her own little world.

I didn't even know how to react in her proximity – most of the time she was just a ticking bomb and every time I talked to her I made her explode with anger. In a sense, Rebekah was just like her father, although Damon had never been as mean to me as she had. They both shared one quality though: ice-coldness.

"Rebekah…" I said reaching out and holding her hand in mine. That was when she looked me in the eye. She was confused, sad, angry, hopeless…

"I'm fine." Her voice was shaky but sincere. I was amazed that she could have such a positive tone when talking to me.

"You don't look fine honey…" She wasn't bothered by me calling her honey like the other times. _One step at a time_ I thought.

"I'm not _really_ fine. I'm just…fine." I knew what she meant. My usual armor defending me against Rebekah collapsed and I found myself confessing things to her.

"I know how you feel." She shook her head.

"I don't think you can." I felt my hands fidgeting.

"I lost my mother when I was 10…" Somehow telling Rebekah that phrase didn't bring me as much pain as usual. It might have been because she had gone through something quite similar. That was probably it. Rebekah's face turned into shock and confusion.

"Your mother… died?"

"No. My mother left me." Her expression got even weirder and for a second I thought she was going to come and hug me. Her composure was completely lost and I got the chance to see the face of a true 12-year-old.

"Why did she do that?"

"God knows…" I said and smiled, trying to seem ok with it. She read through me in an instant.

"I'm sorry." Well, that was definitely a first…

"I'm sorry about your mother as well, Rebekah…" I half-expected her to get up and leave but instead she started eating her ice-cream. Thinking about it all, digesting the new piece of information I had given her.

"Have you seen her ever since?" She asked after a minute or so. She seemed really curious about it all.

"No." I didn't hesitate. I felt my face turn into stone.

"Didn't you go after her?" She said, taking a sip of her juice.

"No, I didn't, Rebekah." I said trying to keep her away. But she was quite a smart girl indeed.

"You knew where she was and you never even tried?" Her reply left me with my mouth hanging open. I smiled so as to applaud her.

"There was no point really. She left us all, never wanted to see us anymore."

"Are you sure about that?"

"I'm sure of it. Not even when my father and brother died – not even then did she come searching for me. And she could have found out one way or the other." It was weird hearing those words come out of my mouth. I couldn't believe I was saying them in front of Rebekah of all people. She didn't seem scared; just shocked.

"I never knew Elena… I'm sorry." Her voice was so childish and sincere that for a second I thought I entered a parallel universe.

"For what honey?"

"For asking you about your family that day at breakfast… for pushing you… You clearly didn't want to talk about it but I did it on purpose." It was endearing that she felt sorry about her actions.

" It's fine, Rebekah, you didn't know."

"Still, it was because of me that you had that asthma attack." It was my turn to be surprised.

"How do you…"

"…know? Dad told me." She said as a matter of fact.

"When?! And… why?" I was still confused. She seemed embarrassed.

"Before leaving to London he had a long talk with me. Asking me to be nice with you because you seemed like a really good person; that you genuinely wanted to help us all... And he mentioned the asthma attack."

"Oh…" Damon had surprised me once again.

"Yeah…" She suddenly exhaled as if she had put two and two together.

"I'm sorry for being such a bitch to you…" I thought I couldn't believe my ears. But it was true – Rebekah was there saying those words out loud. She had apologized three times today.

"I thought you were just another slut that was interested in my dad's money and fame. Turns out it wasn't like that." I felt my cheeks go red as she said that. I could understand why she felt that.

"_Another_…slut?" Emphasis on the 'another' bit… She started laughing.

"Please… My father is the George Clooney of Malibu Beach." That was the weirdest thing I thought I would ever heard from Rebekah. Seeing my surprised face she raised her eyebrows.

"Come on, don't tell me you thought he was a saint." I remembered Damon's words from the beach : _Rebekah blames me for her mother's death. Told me I didn't make her mother happy enough, that I was the reason Katherine committed suicide. I can't say she's wrong, my daughter is partly right._

"No, I guess I didn't."

"Trust me, there's not one woman in L.A. who wouldn't give millions just to get in his bed." Her openness startled me and for a second I thought she was the same age as me.

"I'm 12, Elena, but I'm not stupid..."

"I never said or thought you were." Her expression and voice turned glacial.

"I hate them. All of them... On the day of mom's funeral our house was full of my father's and mother's female acquaintances. And even a few weeks after the funeral they kept coming in and checking on us; also checking whether dad was home to cheer him up – he never was, or at least he always instructed Jenna and Elijah to say that he wasn't. In the beginning I thought they were genuinely sorry for my mum's death. But then I realized they all wanted the same thing." She looked away seeming genuinely disgusted by the memories she was reliving. She tightly closed her eyes.

"Dad was too sad and miserable to even realize what was going on. And he blew them all off without really thinking twice. But there was one occasion when one of them succeeded to get in his pants." Again, the way she was talking about Damon made me think she was an ex-girlfriend rather than his 12-year old daughter.

"Rebekah..." Her voice was steady though and she kept on going.

"I hated him for it. So badly... Doing that in my mother's house with a complete stranger who kept calling me _Rachel_ over and over again..." She wrinkled her nose seeming deeply hurt as she was talking, kept looking away.

"I'm sure it didn't mean anything to him, Rebekah. If she was just a random woman..." Why was I even defending him?! For the first time though, she didn't fight with me.

"No..." she said shaking her head. "That was the problem. That it was with a completely random woman. If he had loved her, maybe...but he just stained my mother's memory without hesitating. No matter how bad a person is, you can't just do that one month after your wife dies..." She felt so strongly about this, I could tell. I pitied her, she had grown up way too soon.

"He didn't do it to hurt you, honey." I said trying to comfort her.

"I know... But I still hated him – for five whole months. And I was beginning to get over that episode and forgive him but then..." She stopped there thinking about her words very carefully. She looked me in the eye and her expression turned cold again.

"...he brought _you_ into the house." My heart must have skipped a beat as I heard her saying that.

"And I hated him more for doing that. More than I hated you, Elena." She said in such a nonchalant manner that it was like she was telling me I was the best nanny ever. I was violently taken aback by her words.

"I don't understand... Why did you hate me so much?" Her eyebrows furrowed in an instant.

"You don't know?!" She asked seeming incredulous. A pause came before I asked.

"Know what Rebekah?" This whole thing was freaking me out.

"You're kidding right...? Have you never seen a picture of my mother?...ever?!" Her face was blank.

"No, I haven't." Where was she going with this?

"Oh my God." She uttered. "You've been completely blind then..."

"I don't understand..." I saw Rebekah take out something from her bag – a picture. She handed it over to me seeming both worried and curious about my reaction.

"I think you should see this with your own eyes."

As I took the picture in my hand I smiled seeing the family – it was a very young version of Damon who was holding what-I assume-was-a -baby Rebekah and next to them was... Katherine. _Oh my God..._

I almost choked as I saw Rebekah's mother. Nothing in the world could have prepared me for this –Rebekah panicked as she saw me fighting for air. I grabbed my bag frantically searching for my inhaler and after I managed to breathe into it I felt more self-conscious than I had ever done. I took the picture in my hand and looked at it again, examining it more carefully. Because despite all odds, I looked very much like Katherine Salvatore...

* * *

"Elena!" Rebekah asked me for the fourth time.

After seeing that picture I threw 20 dollars on the table, took Rebekah by the hand and stormed out to the nearest park. We had been sitting on a bench ever since, me with my head in my hands staring at the pavement. For about 20 minutes I might add...

"Elena, stop it, you're freaking me out!" I managed to overcome my emotions and look at her.

"Do you think he knew that I looked like your mother before hiring me?" Rebekah's face was still for a while but then she very confidently answered.

"No. That's impossible. Jenna told me all about your encounter in the kitchen." I was surprised to see how many things Rebekah was aware about. Oh God, I prayed she didn't know anything about the kiss I had shared with Damon.

"Plus, dad wouldn't have done something like that on purpose. He's not a masochist or sadist... He couldn't have known."

"You seem so confident about your words."

"I know my father better than you."

"True." I felt like pulling my hair out.

"It's just... too freaky." I said and looked at the picture of a very young Katherine staring back at me.

"Tell me about it. She was **my mother**."

"Why do we look alike?" She seemed to have solved that one.

"You don't really. If you look closely she has green eyes – your eyes are dark brown." That was true.

"And you are much taller than my mother as well..." I could clearly see that from the way Damon was holding his wife in his arms. She barely reached his chin.

"Plus, her natural hair colour was blonde. She liked dying it brown sometimes, don't ask me why... but you don't look that much alike! Not when you look closely."

"I agree. But... the rest of our features are so similar..."

"No. That's exactly what I thought as well the first time I saw you..."

"You look alike but only because she was young in that picture. Before she died mother had changed a lot. Look." Another photo magically appeared out of her bag. This one showed such a different woman.

"Wow..." I couldn't help but state but felt sorry for saying it.

"Yeah, mom got really old really early for some reason..." Rebekah sadly said.

"When was this photo taken?" I couldn't help but ask.

"One month before she died."

"Your mother was still beautiful, no matter how badly she had aged..." I sincerely said. There was something about Katherine; maybe it was her seductive cat-like eyes (which I so much lacked) or the gorgeous blonde colour of her hair.

"I thought that as well..." Rebekah added before she put on her mask again. She stated in a dreamy voice.

"I wish she were still alive..." She was staring in the distance. I was about to take her in my arms again and console her when all of a sudden I saw a man running in our direction. Before I could even get up he flashed his giant camera a dozen times capturing both of our shocked faces and blinding us for a few seconds.

My stomach turned upside down as I realized what had just happened. The guy had a sympathetic look on his face when he saw me bewildered and confused and something made him stop and say this one phrase "I'd run really fast if I were you." And then he ran away vanishing into thin air.

It didn't take me long to realize that if one paparazzi had taken photos of us others would do the same thing. I simply took Rebekah by the hand and ran as fast as I could towards the car pushing people in my way and recklessly crossing the streets when I shouldn't really have done that. I had heard stories about Hollywood paparazzi – even one from Caroline – all of them had made my skin turn into goose bumps. Hearing about it was one thing but living it was completely different.

The adrenaline was pumping violently in my veins as I heard voices shouting after us to slow down, to let them take just a picture of us, that they would leave us alone after that. I might have been naïve but I wasn't an idiot. I ignored them rushing through the crowds while Rebekah whined continuously; she never stopped running though. As the car park came into view I heavily exhaled, mentally thinking that we were saved.

Out of the blue though three weird-looking men with cameras blocked our way to the car. I turned around wanting to run back but the other paparazzi had arrived as well and were now taking picture after picture of Rebekah. I took her in my arms protectively covering her face up, not knowing what to do. We were trapped in a circle and I had no idea how to escape. One of the guys came with a microphone next to us asking in a very fake tone of sympathy.

"Miss Salvatore, could you please comment on the ongoing rumors that your mother actually killed herself?" My face turned violent as I heard that jackass ask her that. Rebekah started crying in my arms and I felt like I had screwed up so badly.

"Leaver her alone." I said loud enough for that guy to hear me. He looked at me as if I were crazy.

"And… you are?!"

"The person that's gonna punch you if you don't stop harassing her." The jerk actually started laughing.

"This one actually has some guts…" I was going to reply but another rough-looking man suddenly pulled Rebekah away from me, leaving her completely defenseless in the middle of the gruesome paparazzi hungry for celebrity news.

"Rebekah!" I screamed before another guy immobilized my hands at my back bringing me outside the circle. I couldn't believe this was happening. I felt like dying right then and there.

"That's it honey, give us some good shots." A slimy bastard said.

"Hey, Rebekah, look here sweetie!" Another one shouted.

As she started running towards me the guy with the microphone slightly pushed her back into the circle making her fall on her back and crying out with pain. Hearing her desperate voice and seeing her being harassed by those animals made me lose it completely.

Before I knew it all of my Judo years came back rushing into my veins and my anger made me turn into a monster. Everything that happened next seemed to be in slow motion. Me grabbing the guy who was holding my hands and throwing him over my back on the ground. Me running right into the circle and twisting the camera man's hand so badly that his expensive camera fell on the ground shattering to pieces. Me punching the guy who pushed Rebekah on the ground in the face as hard as I could, clearly breaking his nose in the process. Me getting caught from the back by another paparazzi and hitting him in the forehead with the back of my head making him release me.

After that, the rest of them just ran away scared that I would do the same, or even worse, to them. I scooped Rebekah from the ground, got in the car as soon as possible and drove away without looking back. I felt like I could die right then and there. Because I knew that after this incident Damon would never forgive me…

* * *

Rebekah and I slowly came in the living room without being noticed by anyone. Her right elbow was slightly bleeding after being pushed on the ground but apart from that she seemed fine. I couldn't explain how I felt – embarrassed, guilty, ready to pull my hear out for what I had done today. The only thing I could pray was that Damon didn't find out until later so that I could at least think of what I should do next : quit or not quit.

I made Rebekah sit on the comfy sofa and just as I was going to get her some water from the kitchen Damon's icy voice made me freeze with fear.

"So you **have** come back." I turned around trembling as to what I would see. I tried to keep my face composed as I hoped he hadn't found out.

"Yes."

"I had a very interesting chat with my brother just a few minutes ago, **Miss Gilbert**." I felt betrayed as I realized Stefan had confessed everything.

"You **told** him?!" I turned around facing a very embarrassed Stefan. He didn't reply.

"I thought you understood!" My voice was ice-cold.

"He lied." Damon's empty voice brought shivers down my spine. I was speechless.

"Something that you should be very familiar with…" That had stung.

"Don't worry. Even if he hadn't told me, I would've found out eventually." Damon slowly made his way to the big plasma screen and turned it on Channel 7. I saw myself running away with Rebekah chased by paparazzi… I swallowed hard. Damon looked more furious that I had ever seen him.

"As you can see, you're on the news. And not just once – but over and over again." He switched to the 24h News Channel and then to a completely random teen channel. Again and again I could see flashes of me and Rebekah being hunted like ordinary dogs by the hungry paparazzi. I felt dizzy. I had been completely exposed. Not just to Damon but to the entire world. I felt I had to say something.

"Damon, I…" But I was interrupted half-way.

"Hey everybody! How are you? Why the long faces? It's such a beautiful day!" Caroline's squeaky voice emerged out of nowhere. I didn't even turn around to look at her. I was staring into Damon's cold eyes.

"Get rid of her." He simply said and Stefan obeyed. Damon Salvatore wasn't in a laughing mood at all. That's exactly why I couldn't take my eyes off him for one second.

"I'll deal with **you** later." He looked at me as if I was a worm and then looked at Rebekah in the same ice-cold manner.

"Come on. **We **are going to have a talk young lady." He instructed. Rebekah seemed more scared than ever and was silently begging me to help her. As Damon was already walking towards the door I suddenly blurted.

"No!" He turned around looking shocked by me addressing him let alone screaming at him.

"Excuse me?" It took me a lot of courage to stand up to my boss but I did.

"You heard what I said." I was definitely crazy today.

"I said we were **leaving**,** Miss **Gilbert**.**" Somehow him going back to using my last name was even more humiliating than getting caught.

"I won't let you shout at her. The whole trip, the lying, the hiding – they were all my fault." Rebekah seemed shocked to see me confronting her father.

"**You **do not get to make decisions anymore when it comes to Rebekah. Or any of my kids for that matter." That stung. And then I felt so much hurt.

"When have I **ever** made a decision regarding the kids?" My voice was surprisingly sad. That question actually seemed to take him aback.

"You make all the decisions for me. And this, right here, is my decision. Rebekah is scared and she needs to be taken care of. I will do that. That's my job."

"No you won't. I am going to take care of my daughter while you're out making such brilliant **decisions**…" For a second there I thought that he was going to fire me. But then something miraculous happened.

"She wasn't to blame!" Rebekah simply shrieked making us both jump. "I wanted to go out and made her take me shopping. I guilt-trapped her into saying _Yes_ and she agreed cause she's such a goodie-two-shoes. You can't blame her for something I wanted to do." I couldn't believe my ears. Rebekah of all people was defending me. In front of her father… Damon seemed adamant though.

"Go to your room, Rebekah." Before she could even reply Damon shouted.

"**R-i-g-h-t n-o-w!**" She seemed so scared that she couldn't do anything but run outside the living room closing the door behind her. Which left me all alone with Damon… I clenched my teeth as I saw the furious glare on his face. I was so getting staked today.

"Give me one good reason why I shouldn't fire you." I froze.

"You can do whatever you want." He started laughing.

"You're bullshitting. Big time. I'll tell you something. I don't appreciate bullshiters."

"You can think whatever you want."

"So you're telling me you have no desire to stay?" He seemed confused and taken aback.

"There's no point in me staying any longer if you don't want me here." I said avoiding his gaze. I was being weak but then again I couldn't stand looking him in the eye.

"I should kill you for what you did today to my daughter." Again, such a nonchalant manner of voicing unpleasant thoughts... I ultimately cracked.

"What did I do that was so wrong? I just took Rebekah out. Nothing happened to her!" I thought he was going to strangle me by the way he was staring at me.

"Are you freaking kidding me?! Nothing happened to her?!" Wrong thing to say to an angry father.

"I defended her."

"She shouldn't have needed to be defended in the first place."

"I agree and I apologize for my actions. I shouldn't have hid it from you. But she thought you wouldn't agree to it."

"Damn right I wouldn't have agreed to it! I avoid letting them go out precisely because of what happened today."

"We were just unlucky…"

"Unlucky? Those animals almost broke her hand when they pushed her around."

"I don't think she has any broken bones. She would have said."

"That's not the point ELENA!" He thundered coming towards so fast I thought he was going to slap me. He was pointing his finger at me.

"**You** shouldn't have let this happen in the first place! You should have told me, you should have asked Elijah to accompany you."

"Elijah? Damon, he's 50 years old. He couldn't have helped us."

"So you're telling me you handled things properly today?"

"I think I did. Not when I lied to you and snuck her out the house. But when I defended her. I didn't let them do anything bad to her, Damon… I protected her as much as I could."

A long pause came as he didn't know what to reply.

"I know you did. I saw you on the news right before you came inside the house. The whole media is talking about you. I'm afraid you'll most definitely be sued by the paparazzi."

"What?" That had come as a true shock.

"You smashed a camera they were filming with, broke a guy's nose and kicked two other guys' asses in the process. I'm sure you'll be sued for attacking them."

"Attacking **them**? They were attacking **us**!"

"The law doesn't agree with you on this point."

"Well that's crap! I don't deserve to be sued. I was just defending me and the child I was responsible for."

"I agree. Unfortunately that's what happens in such cases." I was panicking by the second.

"What's going to happen to me?"

"Nothing. Stefan will defend you. You'll probably get off with a big cheque to write to the gossip magazines and some community work. I reckon you haven't committed any felony before today?" He seemed less angry.

"No." My voice was shaking.

"Then you have nothing to worry about. I'll give them the money and you'll do the voluntary work." A long pause came before I could answer.

"Thank you." Damon's eyes turned furious again.

"Oh no. Don't you dare thank me. I'm not doing this for you." He stated in his usual ice-cold voice.

"I'm doing this for Rebekah. Apparently she looks up to you now. And I really don't want to be the bad guy again. You can be her hero." I pitied him.

"She just wanted to escape this house Damon. She feels suffocated! She wants to see the world outside these four walls."

"Wow, thank you **so much** for the heads up Elena!" He said and sarcastically winked at me. I felt like punching him for being such an arrogant jerk.

"You should be an understanding father..."

"Wow, that's advice coming from **you**… See, don't get me wrong, Elena. I don't mind being the bad guy in this household. I've always been the bad guy in my family. I will make all the life and death decisions regarding my kids while you're busy worrying about collateral damage. I'll even let Rebekah hate me for it. But at the end of the day, I'll be the one to keep her safe."

"You're being so unfair..." My voice was cracking.

"Really? Little girl thinks she's not treated properly?" Now he was mocking me.

"I'm not talking about me. You can scream at me all you want, you're entitled to that. But you're being unfair to Rebekah."

"So enlighten me. Why am I being unfair to my daughter?"

"Because I know what you'll do to her."

"And what is that?" He said whilst pouring a drink for himself.

"You're gonna have a talk as usual, ground her for disobeying your rules and then you won't be addressing her for a few weeks, make her feel miserable." He turned around to stare me in the eyes.

"What in God's name are you talking about?" He seemed furious again.

"That's what you've done to me in the past month. You've punished me over and over again for not even giving you a chance. I'm really sorry, Damon… Please understand that I…"

"That's enough!" He threw his glass on the floor and as it shattered I genuinely felt fear coursing through my veins. How could I have been so wrong about Damon Salvatore? Right now he seemed an animal compared to the angel I had met on the beach on that magical night.

"You have to leave now." I defiantly stared back at him.

"You're pissing me off, I'm already very angry and you **need** to leave."

"Is that why you're so upset right now? That I rejected you back in July?! That's why you're taking this whole thing out on me?"

"No, Elena! I'm angry at you because you didn't think! You didn't even think about the consequences of your actions for a second. You put my child in danger and you lied to me about it. And now, we all have to pick up the broken pieces following your mess."

"You have every right to be mad about today. I'm sorry about that. I'll never do it again, I promise."

"Damn right you won't do it again if you want to keep living here. I won't allow anyone to be that reckless when it comes to my children!"

"Reckless?! I took Rebekah out shopping. I didn't say yes to her jumping off a building..."

"Excuse me, have we switched bodies all of a sudden? Cause I'm hearing you raise your voice at **me.**"

"I'll raise my voice if I have to. You're not listening to me Damon!"

"Typical woman…" He said with a smug on his face.

"I'm not even gonna reply to that."

"Good, then you can find the way out yourself."

"For the record, I know how to be a good nanny. How to take care of kids and make them happy. And trust me when I say this, it's getting harder and harder to make them happy without taking them outside. You won't even allow them to go swimming while supervised in the ocean, which is 50 feet away from this house. How are they supposed to grow up and know the world if you keep them in this cage?"

"You have no right to judge the way I behave with my children. If you don't like it, you can resign."

"That's not what I want to do."

"Then what the hell do you want Elena?!"

"I want you to stop acting like a hurt little child and get over the fact that I can't be with you."

"Get your ass out that door until I throw you on my shoulder and carry you out myself."

"No. You can't just shut people out when you don't like what they're saying."

"You've already disappointed me enough today, **Miss Gilbert**. I'm warning you…" His arrogant sarcastic voice was the last straw. There's only so much humiliation that a woman can take.

I found myself doing something I would've never thought of doing. I felt my right hand curl into a fist and then I just wanted to hit Damon in the face – punch him as hard as I could – for everything that he had said, for being such a jerk to me in the past month, for kissing me in the first place. And then, just as anger blinded me, I felt my hand being caught right before it hit his face. His grip was so brutal that I felt a tear involuntarily come down my cheek after a few seconds. I wasn't angry or upset anymore. I was simply hyperventilating. I felt utter fear as I saw him slowly closing the distance between our faces. We looked at each other's lips for a split second and then made eye contact. What I saw in his eyes made me feel so ashamed of how I was acting.

"Don't ever do that again."

* * *

He was right there – in all his glory next to the most beautiful woman at the party – Andie Star. They looked so good together – a match made in heaven for all I knew. I turned around right before Damon Salvatore could spot me. I wasn't in the mood to pretend or lie. I had had enough of that. For the past month since the paparazzi incident that had been all I had done – pretended to be happy; to want to be in that household; to accept the fact that he would never forgive me for that day. I didn't know why he hadn't fired me. It would've been easier for both of us. But he probably thought that firing me was the easy way out for me. He had wanted to torture me. Continuosly…

And tortured me he did. Let's see – what did he do first? Ah, yes, I remember. He denied me the right to talk to any of his children in private anymore – Jenna or Elijah were supposed to be with me all the time, watching my every move and step. This way I wouldn't be tempted to deceive him and run away with his kids anymore. Second of all, he stopped looking at me. Not talking to me – but looking at me; made me feel like an unworthy being. Third – he never showed up at my court hearing. As he had said, I was called to court where Stefan defended me against the paparazzi I had beaten up. Damon was supposed to be a key witness in my favor. He never showed up…

The last dreadful thing he had done was to make me attend his glamorous 20's themed party that was organized in the backyard. The kids were sleeping upstairs while I had to sit down here surrounded by complete strangers and feeling awkward in the dress he had ordered me to wear tonight. Well, he hadn't exactly ordered but sending Caroline with a gorgeous white dress together with a perfect set of accessories, meant the same thing to me. So here I was getting humiliated by him again – but being unable to do anything about it. After all, I had signed a 12-month contract and he wouldn't let me quit anyway.

A very recent pop song crept into the music list and all of a sudden I felt like I was in a movie. I was staring at my boss who was on the other side of the swimming pool.

_Is anybody out there? _

His gorgeous grey eyes made contact with mine.

_Is anybody listening? _

He had truly listened to me that night on the beach. But since then he hadn't listened at all.

_Does anybody really know it's the end of the beginning?_

It truly felt like the end to us. Whatever we had had going on for the past five months was obviously coming to an end. I should have felt relief – I had never wanted to be with him since it would have complicated everything. I should have been happy for him. Andie seemed like a really good partner for him. But somehow, no matter how badly I tried to hide it, my feelings came out and then I realized.

_It's everything you wanted. It's everything you don't._

Damon represented everything I wanted and everything I didn't.

_It's one door swinging open and one door swinging closed._

Mason had been the door swinging closed. But Damon could have been the door swinging open for me.

_Some prayers find an answer, some prayers never know_

Ross Copperman was so right… Some prayers never did find an answer…

_We're holding on and letting go…_

* * *

_**DAMON's POV**  
_

I had invited more than 300 guests to this party. There were some people that I didn't even know had come. So many connections, so many people from the law firm. So many ass lickers and gold diggers that I felt I was going to be sick. I had entertained all of them. Well, almost all of them.

Elena was standing on the other side of the pool staring intently in my eyes. I was having a legal chat with Alaric Saltzman, my other best friend apart from Klaus. Normally I would've engaged in this conversation giving 100%. But since Alaric was already tipsy I couldn't be bothered to even pretend I was listening. My only concern was the beautiful girl who was begging me to forgive her. I could see it in her eyes. In her gestures. She wanted to come and talk to me but she didn't have the courage to.

How could she? I had ignored her the entire night. Even though I had wanted to tell her so badly how beautiful she looked in the dress I had picked for her. That dress. God… How humiliated she must have felt upon receiving the package from Caroline of all people. An enthusiastic Caroline who probably didn't even let her object to this whole charade… I had treated Elena like scum for the past months and I hadn't even apologized once. I started to think that Rebekah had been right. That I was the only reason Katherine had killed herself. It would explain what I was doing now – torturing Elena like this.

And the only reason I was doing that was because she had rejected me. She had been right; but no way in hell was I going to admit it in front of her. My stupid pride had always got the best of me… always made me flawed. That was what I had always heard from my father. No matter how hard it was to accept, he had been right all along – my pride would eventually be the death of me.

* * *

**ELENA's POV**

I slowly made my way inside the house since I couldn't take it anymore being out there. I deeply inhaled and exhaled. It was too much for me – this whole charade. First thing in the morning I would leave. There was nothing more for me to do here. Contract or no contract – I couldn't stand being next to him anymore; not when he paraded his girlfriend like that in front of me and making me watch as well.

I suddenly realized that the living room light was on. I made my way to the door curious to see who was inside. I was surprised to see a man with his back turned to me, admiring the painting of Damon's four kids. I felt like talking to someone who wasn't outside so I simply said in a sincere voice.

"Beautiful isn't it?" As he heard my voice, the mystery man turned around to look me in the eye.

I felt like I had stepped back in time when I saw his green eyes, cocky smile, confident posture.

There was really nothing different about him…but I still couldn't believe it.

Mason was standing right in front of me looking more dangerous and cunning than ever before…

* * *

**_I hope you guys like it! The next chapter is going to be legendary - I promise you. Many secrets will be revealed... So what did you think of this chapter? Please review..._**


	15. Chapter 15 Jar of hearts

_**Hello everybody! I cannot even begin to thank all of you for your wonderful encouraging reviews! They really touched my heart. Am so glad to see that you're enjoying this story! So this is chapter 15, I have been so excited about this. Couldn't wait to publish it. I really hope you enjoy this one as much as I did! The song is inspired from Christina Perri's song "Jar of hearts".**_

* * *

**CHAPTER 14 – JAR OF HEARTS**

* * *

"Hey…" I swear to God – my heart must have stopped for a second when I heard his voice.

"Mason…" My voice was just a whisper.

"Elena…"That familiar voice… it made my entire body freeze. I closed my eyes and then opened them again; and there he was – standing in the middle of Mr. Salvatore's lounge looking as arrogant and classy as he always did. I took one step back as I saw him coming towards me. He stopped in his tracks after noticing my probably-incredulous expression.

"How… What are you **doing here**?" He became serious as he spoke.

"I came to talk to you…" _Wow, and I could have never figured that one out all by myself…_

"Tough luck, I have no desire to even look you in the eye, let alone talk." My voice was so hoarse I couldn't believe my ears. He didn't seem preoccupied by my tone though.

"You know that's not true…" Mason replied in his sexy voice and kindly smiled to me like he used to when we were going out. I briefly wondered if that was true.

"You're a mind reader now?!" I always got pissed off when he pretended to know what I wanted as if I was the child and he was the adult.

"That's not what I…" I didn't let him finish his sentence.

"What do you want from me after all this time?" He seemed taken aback by my determination. This time I was going to be the adult and him the kid – not like the last time we had talked.

"I want you back, Elena…" I raised my eyebrows at hearing his seemingly genuine voice.

"You…want…me…back?" And then I burst into laughter – such a crazy laughter that could have scared anybody. I couldn't contain it.

"What's wrong, why are you laughing?" I forgot how dumb he used to be sometimes. I used to think his naïve side was extremely cute – now it felt downright stupid.

"That's the silliest idea I have ever heard in my entire life…" I kept laughing.

"I come here all the way from New York, wanting to get back together and this is how you respond to what I say?" His question made me stop laughing. I was dead-angry with him…

"I cannot **believe** how much nerve you have…" I said shaking my head.

"You actually think that you can come into this house and do this whole circus? Proclaiming your love for me and asking me to get back together? This isn't even my **own** home – it's the place where I work… You had **no right **coming here." I said waving my hands in the air frenetically and pointing at him like he was a criminal.

"I know I didn't… But there was no other way to contact you. I didn't know your phone number, I simply knew where you lived." There he was, acting like a victim again in the story…Wait, what?

"Bonnie never told you where I lived." I stated in a low tone. His face turned blue all of a sudden. He couldn't say a thing in response – I was right about it.

"How in God's name did you even find me here?" I asked, my voice trembling… He couldn't look me in the eye. Which is when I figured that…

"No..." I said… He suddenly looked at me very strangely. He was ashamed – that single gesture confirmed my suspicions.

"No, you didn't, Mason." My voice was pleading now. I couldn't stop it going from angry to pleading.

"Elena…" He felt sorry for it – I could tell. He started closing the distance between us. I just didn't care about how sorry he felt.

"Stop right there!" I shouted with my hand coming out to stop him in his tracks. He listened.

"Ok, calm down." He had his hands out gesturing me to calm down as if I was a lunatic.

"Don't you DARE tell me to calm down!" I basically spit the words out of my mouth. "I want you to say it out loud. Tell me how you found me here out of all places."

"Elena…" His voice was truly ashamed.

"TELL ME GOD DAMN IT!" I found myself shouting so loudly my throat hurt. Mason's expression had become startled since I was surely drawing attention to us. People could have heard from outside. He was cornered – he just had to say the truth.

"I hired a private detective." Tears started pouring down my cheeks the moment he said that. A normal girl would've been afraid that her make-up was becoming a mess. I felt drops of tears mixed with mascara falling on my immaculate white dress. I didn't care…

"You BASTARD!" I managed to say before I felt the world spinning around me.

The first guy taking those pictures of me and Rebekah in the park had been his private detective. That's why he had told me to run… It was all because of him that the paparazzi had recognized us in the first place. It was because of his private detective that reporters had stalked us like animals. But it wasn't only because of that incident that I was so angry with him. He was up to his old tricks again – private detectives, lying about stuff to Bonnie… it was so typical Mason!

"Elena, I'm sorry…"

"Oh, I **bet** you're so sorry!" My voice was so sarcastic – just like Damon's usually was…

"It was the only way I could track you down… You had to hear what I needed to tell you."

"Wow… God must be punishing me really bad for something I've done in this life." I said getting really angry.

"What…?!" He was confused. I felt the need to explain once and for all.

"He must be, otherwise I don't get why I have to go through all of this with **you**…"

"Elena, I'm really sorry I did that…" Strangely enough, despite hearing the sincerity in his voice, I couldn't wait to tell him to go to hell.

"YOU SHOULD BE SORRY!" Another loud scream that brought me to the edge of the cliff. Every single feeling that I had ever felt about him was coming out way too quickly for me to contain it.

"You son of a bitch… After what you did to me, do you actually think that I'll ever take you back?"

"I do, Elena… Because I love you." My heart broke all over again – like all the other times…

"You love me…" I said with an absent-minded tone.

"Yes, I do…"

"Where were you then Mason?" My question and hoarse tone silenced him.

"Where were you when I needed you the most?" Again, silence…

"When the one person who could make things right wasn't there next to me?" He seemed furious for some reason.

"You're acting like this because of him, aren't you?" And there it was…

"What are you talking about? Don't change the subject…"

"No, Elena, don't **you **change the subject! I saw you in those pictures… Going to a club with him, dancing together, laughing, walking on the beach after midnight on your birthday…" He was talking about Mr. Salvatore! He had taken pictures of us as well?

"You're incredible, you scoundrel. Wrecking things is your specialty…"

"Elena, I know you think he cares about you, big movie star from L.A. giving you so much attention. But he doesn't, sweetie." I looked at him and felt I could burn holes in his body with a giant magnifying glass.

"Don't you dare call me sweetie! You haven't earned the right to do that."

"You're just hurt because you know I'm right. That Damon guy doesn't love you, he simply wants to have his way with you…" His voice was territorial… I felt my patience reaching the maximum limit.

"Oh, really?! And what do **you** want me back for?" He had not expected that acidic answer.

"That bastard has changed you already hasn't he?" _Obviously, just assume random things you idiot._

"Don't you dare talk about Mr. Salvatore like that, you mongrel!" He looked very confused at my reply but then hatred poured all over his face.

"Wow… I wasn't sure before but now I know…" He seemed hurt.

"What do you even mean?"

"That you're **already** sleeping with him." Rage coursed through me.

I threw the first thing that came into my hands towards him; with incredible force I might add. He ducked at the last minute and it – which was a photo frame – ended up in the mirror behind him that came crashing down on the floor breaking into millions of pieces.

"Great… another seven years of bad luck… As if I hadn't had enough so far…" I muttered nervously tapping my foot against the floor. That's what I did when I was angry.

"Are you crazy?!" Mason asked having a very surprised and angry expression on his face.

"Yes… I actually am. And I'm also so angry that I feel like I could kill you with my bare hands…" He knew I wasn't joking. I would obviously never kill anyone with my bare hands but he had gotten the message – he knew how well I could fight. He had witnessed it once...

**DAMON's POV**

I ran towards the living room as I heard something quite heavy crashing on the floor. I was lucky enough to be next to the entrance that I managed to hear it. Otherwise I would've certainly missed it in all the noise outside on the patio. As I went inside the deserted house I could hear them talking – Elena's voice and then a random man's voice…

"What the hell happened to you, Elena?!" The guy asked in an upset fashion. It sounded as though they were fighting. My muscles tensed as I heard his arrogant, rude tone.

"YOU happened to me, Mason…" I instantly flinched as I heard Elena's voice – she was upset. No, worse than that, she seemed extremely furious – I'd never heard her talking like that. Not even to me…

As I came in front of the living room I could see her standing right in front of the door with her petite back towards me, looking at that Mason guy. I must say, he didn't look too friendly at that moment – he seemed like he was accusing her of something. He suddenly flinched as he saw me standing right behind Elena.

"What's going on here?" I asked in a very demanding tone. I knew that they were fighting – anyone could have guessed that. Elena turned around only to see my puzzled expression when I caught a glimpse of the shattered mirror all over the living room floor.

"Don't worry about your mirror **sir**. It will be **fully** reimbursed from my paycheck, I'll make sure of it." Her anger was also directed towards me – and who could blame her? After the way I had treated her the previous months I deserved more than that.

"I don't care about the mirror, Elena…" That's when she turned her gaze from Mason and looked me in the eye – she had a poker face on but I could see all the hurt and struggle that was going on inside her. Her eyes changed when she saw the support in mine though.

"Are you ok?" I asked her as gently as possible.

"Oh, she's fine – she even tried to hit me in the head with a damn photo frame…"

"I didn't ask **you **anything…" I said, getting pissed off already by this guy's attitude.

"Elena, look at me please…" When her face full of mascara turned to look me in the eyes properly my heart skipped a beat. What had happened to her? I instinctively grabbed her hands in mine.

"Be honest with me. Did this man hurt you in any way?" She was hyperventilating for some reason.

"Oh, come on… Give me a break." This guy was really getting on my nerves. Instead of losing my temper I focused on Elena and ignored him completely.

"No, he didn't _physically_ hurt me." She seemed sincere. Good… At least we got that straight. I nodded in response.

"Who is this man, Elena?" Her eyes were impenetrable as she answered me.

"Somebody that I **used** to know…"

"Mason Lockwood, that's my name."

**ELENA's POV**

"Very well…" My boss said in a strong tone. And then his tone changed to his hoarse one.

"Now, tell me, _Mason_… who **the hell** are you and what are you doing in my house without any invitation whatsoever?" He made two steps forward seeming more menacing than I'd ever seen him. Mason looked a bit startled which gave me so much satisfaction...

"Hey, calm down, dude…"

"DUDE? Really? Dude?" I flicked my eyes from one man to the other desperate not to lose anything that happened between them. Mr. Salvatore was really pissed off.

"Look, I don't want any trouble with you…" _Such a coward…_

"Well, since you're in my house and uninvited, you might expect the host to be a bit unwelcoming, don't you think?" There he was, my sarcastic boss coming to my rescue…

"I just wanted to talk to Elena…" _Oh no…_

"And you think that shouting at a woman and making her cry is the best strategy to use when wanting to talk to her?" I deeply sighed for I knew what was coming.

"You don't have the right to question how I talk or don't talk to Elena… I've known her for a much longer time than you have, _Damon Salvatore_..." I held my breath as I could hear how defiant Mason's voice was. I saw my boss looking surprised as he took in Mason's words.

"Shut the hell up, Mason." I said.

"Or what, Elena? Oh, let me guess… you don't want to make your _boss_ jealous. That's why you never told him about us." Again, I felt like I could kill him. Mr. Salvatore turned around with a questioning look on his face. I was so ashamed that I could see everything in a distinctive shade of red.

"There's nothing to tell, Mason… Apart from how big of an asshole you've proven to be…"

"I'm the asshole in the whole story? If I remember correctly you were the one who never wanted to see me again, never took my calls or let me explain…" That had done it… I felt my legs moving towards him slowly. I didn't even acknowledge Mr. Salvatore anymore – I couldn't take any more of Mason's crap.

"If **I** remember correctly **you** were the one who gave up on us. **You** were the one who turned his back on me when I needed you the most… **You** said that you were sorry ever to have met me…" My voice was trembling…

"If you want to come here and make a big scandal just because you want me back in New York as your beautiful shiny toy then be it your way… I don't care how much you'll ask, how much you'll beg… I shall never come back to you! You heard me, Mason Lockwood? NEVER!" I turned around to leave when I heard him saying:

"Elena, I know that you still love me deep down…" I closed my eyes shut trying to contain my frustration but then I exploded.

"YOU BROKE MY HEART!" I thundered. I was wailing… "YOU TORE MY HEART APART, MASON… YOU WILL **NEVER** GET ME BACK! Just deal with it…" I said and I felt like I would lose my voice any second.

My knees suddenly felt weak but before I could even flinch I felt two warm and strong hands gently grabbing my shoulders and making sure I didn't fall to the ground. Mr. Salvatore surely must have heard my despair that had made Mason completely and utterly silent. At first I felt so embarrassed that he was witnessing all of this but now I felt so grateful for him being here with me – I needed him so much, not only to defend me but to support me as well.

"I think we're done talking… Take your loud mouth and nerves and get the hell out of my house!" My boss demanded as he took a tighter hold of me by putting one arm around my waist.

Seeing me embraced by Mr. Salvatore, Mason simply lost it, huffing before he accused me.

"And you act as if you're such a _virgin_…" His words made me sick – he was such a bastard… I could feel my boss's body tense when he heard Mason's profanities.

"When all you ever wanted was to get a hold on your boss." He said the word boss as if Mr. Salvatore was my lover and not my boss. God, I never imagined Mason would be so vengeful. He had a lot in common with his aunt…

"You're insane…" My voice was empty. He looked happy that he was hurting me this much. When he started coming towards us, Mr. Salvatore let go of my body and stepped in, hiding me from Mason.

"Tell me, Damon…" Mason said the words as if they had been old friends… I could see my boss tensing again – I felt as if he was losing his patience. I was dreading his next words… Or actions for that matter…

"Is Elena as good in your bed as she used to be in mine?" he asked with a malicious tone.

I didn't even have time to open my mouth for air when I heard Mr. Salvatore's hand colliding with Mason's jaw so powerfully that I thought he had dislodged it. I blinked a few times only to see what an animalistic expression my boss had. I had never seen him like that – not even in one of his movies. I felt dumbstruck but not because he had hit Mason. I thanked God he had, cause he deserved it. I just couldn't believe how full of hate he was towards Mason – almost as much as I was. It didn't make sense – but maybe he was pissed off because of all those horrible words Mason had uttered. But it was like he wanted to kill Mason – I knew **I** wouldn't actually do it, but something told me that he would. I quickly made my way to Mr. Salvatore and grabbed his hand looking at him with concerned eyes. He seemed to change completely when he saw my face.

"He's not worth it, Damon…" He seemed to disagree at first but then turned his head towards Mason who, full of blood around his mouth was trying to get up from the floor. Mr. Salvatore looked at him in a disgusted fashion.

"Get out of here this instance or I'll drag you out myself in front of all those people." I trembled as his words sank in – he really meant them.

"You're gonna pay for this, Salvatore!" Mason said as he wiped the blood from his mouth.

"Yeah?! Well, wait in line! I have much worse enemies than you, Lockwood!" Mr. Salvatore yelled quite ferociously.

"You'll regret this, Elena…" The stare he gave me twisted my stomach.

"I pity you, Mason… I truly do…"

"If you even dare to come near Elena or upset her ever again you will have to deal with me, Lockwood…"

"Don't worry, I don't want to have anything to do with her anymore…" He seemed to be leaving when he suddenly turned around and stared at me intently.

"You know, I'll never forgive you for that…" He said as my eyebrows furrowed.

"What are you talking about?" I weakly shook my head feeling so tired.

"It would've been one month old right now…" My lungs powerfully constricted.

"…if you hadn't killed it." And then he left, leaving me breathless and with a pain in my chest greater than I had ever felt in my life.

The only thing I remember was looking at Mr. Salvatore's face before I collapsed to the floor. He seemed incredulous, shocked and appalled… I managed to utter one single word as I felt my knees weakening and my lungs constricting even more.

"Help…"

And then everything went black.

* * *

**ELENA's POV**

I felt I had been sleeping for ages. The moment I opened my eyes I felt how numb my body was. I tried moving my right hand but instead I realized I had a needle stuck in my arm and a drip connected to it. I panicked as I remembered the last time I had woken up like this. Before I could really start panicking I felt a soft palm caressing my cheek.

"Damon?" I asked and heard my voice was just a whisper.

"Shhh… you should be sleeping right now." He answered in the sweetest voice I'd ever heard him use.

"What…" Before I could finish my question I realized I was in a hospital bed. Shock overcame me but before I could even move Damon grabbed my hand and gently squeezed it, reassuring me.

"You're going to be fine Elena. I promise!" His eyes were so worried that I couldn't help but reply.

"But…" He put his finger on my lips, silencing me.

"You fainted…back home. I had to bring you to the hospital, I didn't know what was wrong with you." He stated in the same gentle worried tone as before. Although he was trying to seem unaffected, I could tell how shocked he had been about me fainting.

"Oh…" I involuntarily took my hand to my head and when I touched my temple it hurt so bad I actually winced.

"You fell on one side and hit your head pretty badly. But the doctors said you were completely fine. They just wanted to keep you here under observation" I went silent. I didn't know what to respond to that. It was all coming back – Mason's whole charade and his painful words. I felt my eyes fill with tears. Damon's eyes were full of hurt from what I could tell. He was probably pitying me. Who was I kidding? I deserved pity.

"Damon, can you do something for me?" I asked hearing my voice about to crack.

"Anything…" He said in a heartbeat.

"Take me home please." His expression changed into hesitation in an instant.

"Elena, I can't do that…"

"Please…" I begged grabbing hold of his hand. He was taken aback by my determined reaction. It was night time, there were no nurses around and I could easily sneak out of here but I needed his help. Still, his eyes were incredulous.

"I can't stay here, Damon…" Tears started falling down my cheeks.

"I just can't take it… Please take me home." He didn't hesitate this time. I don't know if I had changed his mind or if he didn't want to make me more sad than I already was.

Next thing I knew Damon was scooping me up in his arms after gently taking the needle out of my arm. The last thing I remember was him carrying me out of the hospital room and down the corridor.

* * *

Tears kept coming down my cheeks and I couldn't control them. Damon looked disturbed by my appearance which made me think that I must have looked absolutely horrible. I could not care less. I didn't feel like entertaining anyone tonight – not even my boss. Despite the high temperatures outside I could feel every cell in my body shivering. I felt incredibly cold for some reason. The shock hadn't left me yet. Damon was kind enough to send everyone to bed when we arrived back home and to take care of me in his office.

I was sat on the couch next to the fireplace wondering why in God's name had Damon built a fireplace here in the first place. I mean, the minimum temperature must have been around 10 degrees in L.A. Could he ever get this cold?

"Would you like something to drink?" I shook my head without even looking at him. I was too busy staring at the curtains lining the office window.

"When did you buy those sir?" I asked not even realizing I was pointing.

"They are gorgeous." Damon seemed baffled, turned around and realized I was talking about the curtains. He put the bottle of water down and slowly made his way towards me. He grabbed a chair and sat right in front of me, making sure that he wasn't touching me though. He started in a sweet tone.

"Katherine was the one who bought them when she redecorated the house." He waited for my reaction.

"She had really good taste." I said in awe. I realized that I was talking about something so random after everything that had happened tonight. It felt normal to me though…

"I guess she did…" He reluctantly said and then I saw his eyebrows furrowing. His expression was sad.

"Elena, can you please do something for me, honey?" Despite my state of complete carelessness, him calling me honey made my head go up in an instant. I was confused.

"After what you did for me tonight, sir, you can ask me anything…" His eyes were full of so much concern that it was impossible not to avoid his stare.

"Well first of all… from now on, please call me Damon… No more Mr. Salvatore and sir for you…" I simply nodded not understanding why he was saying this to me.

"Good girl…" He lovingly said. My heart filled with emotions I wasn't really supposed to have for him. I couldn't help it though. What was the point of fighting against it anymore? I had decided to leave anyway at some point. Might as well just stop denying it…

"Thank you… for tonight." I found myself saying. I was staring away, couldn't dare to look him in the eye. He didn't need any other explanation. He knew what I meant.

"You have nothing to thank me for Elena." Out of the blue I felt my neutral expression turning into an empty sulky one. The walls I had built around me these past two months when he hadn't talked to me at all came crumbling down.

All of a sudden he extended his hand towards me. He was holding a glass full of alcohol.

"Here… have some bourbon. It will help you forget." I let go of the blanket I had around my shoulders and willingly took the drink. I sipped out of it but then let out a sound like a young displeased kid would.

"Yeah…it's quite strong." He replied. When I remained silent he reached for his pocket taking out something. It was my necklace! The one my father had given to me when I turned 18.

"I found it in the living room. It must have fell from your neck when you fainted." In a normal circumstance I would've cared but I didn't. Not tonight..

"He's really gone…" I couldn't help but say. His eyes were confused.

"After everything that we went through, now he's just a monster…" Realization hit Damon.

"The way he talked about me, the way he **looked** at me…" I couldn't stop talking about it…

"The way he accused me of killing our…" I couldn't say it out loud. But I didn't have to. I knew Damon had put two and two together. He was anything but stupid. His expression remained sad. God knows what he must have thought about me after hearing Mason's words. After realizing I had had an abortion following my break up with him.

"Elena, honey… Shh." He tightly squeezed my hand making me look into his eyes.

"That's all in the past. That scumbag deliberately said all of those things to hurt you."

"I don't understand why he did that."

"He did it because he still loves you." Damon firmly said. My eyes turned to his.

"And you don't love him back… Some men can't cope with that. They react in different ways, the most common one being revenge." That didn't help me hate him less.

"You didn't deserve that though." He said making me disagree in an instance.

"You don't know that."

"I **do** know that. You're pure, Elena. Your heart is so pure…" He said deeply staring into my eyes. I could see so much love in his eyes...

"How can you say that? After everything you found out about me tonight?" His eyes told me he had understood what I was really asking him. As Mason had said, I was no virgin and I had killed my own baby. For no good reason really... I was the definition of a horrible person.

"I think you had a sound reason to do that." I couldn't believe he actually thought that without even knowing my story. Seeing my wide eyes he continued.

"I'm not the right person to judge you Elena. I don't know the whole story and I don't want to either - not tonight and not as long as you're not ready to tell me. What I do know is that you're sensible, caring, not the best decision-maker but… You never do things for the wrong reason. You do things because you genuinely believe they'll benefit someone. That's not wrong at all. In fact, it's something I appreciate about your character a whole lot. It's what makes you different from everybody else." His words were more than surprising, they were soothing.

"You have no idea what you're talking about." I said shaking my head and feeling tears gathering in my eyes.

"There's not one day that passes without me regretting my decision." I said and I felt my heart breaking down all over again.

"You're not the only one with regrets, Elena…" He said and firmly grabbed my palm in his. The way he had said it made me realize what he was regretting. Not talking to me, ignoring me for two whole months, making me feel like shit. I felt tears pouring on my cheeks as I told him the following.

"I miss my best friend…" And then my voice broke. "I miss my father, my brother... I have no one to help me deal with all of this right now. I'm all alone."

"No you're not. You have me…" His words filled my heart with warmth. But then I remembered all of the moments he had turned his back on me and I couldn't help but ask.

"Where were you in these past months Damon?" My bottom lip was trembling and I felt like a helpless child. His face was so full of shame and regret that I almost forgave him for everything he had done. Almost...

"I shouldn't have shut you out like that… I was so wrong." Damon gently closed the distance between us and took my face in his hands. I thought he was going to kiss me but he never did. He simply looked into my eyes, breathed in my smell and caressed my cheeks as his eyebrows kept being furrowed. He started in a sweet but firm tone.

"I promise I will never abandon you again…"

What happened next was strange because I did something I hadn't done in a long time when it came to men. I truly believed his promise…

* * *

**REBEKAH's POV**

I woke up as I heard a door opening at the end of the corridor. That was strange... I looked at the clock. It was 5.30 am! Who the hell was making noise this early in the morning?! Not even Jenna woke up this early.

I got out of bed, put my bunny slippers and robe on and silently turned the handle. As I went into the hallway I was surprised to see light coming from Elena's room. What was she doing?! I would've normally turned back but I felt something wasn't right.

I made my way to her room but kept quiet. Her door was almost closed but there was a narrow space that I peeped through without hesitating. I felt my mouth widely opening as I saw my father of all people in Elena's room. What the hell was he doing there? Had they… **slept together**?! Oh my God, **no!**! I just couldn't accept that, it just couldn't be true. But then I calmed down and remembered that they weren't even talking the previous night. No, something else must have happened.

I took a better look and saw that Elena was in her bed peacefully sleeping. Dad on the other hand was standing next to her bead and… caressing her cheek... I swallowed twice as I realized what was happening. It wasn't that simple gesture that made me go crazy inside. He could've done that for a thousand different reasons. It was the look my father had on his face. He seemed worried, sad, but also caring… The same way he used to look at my mum sometimes. I looked at his face for a few seconds and then it hit me. I could just tell, there was no hiding it. It was such a simple explanation – it seemed crazy, impossible, made no sense but…

My father... he was in love with Elena…

* * *

_**So what did you guys think? I cannot wait for your reviews! Until next time... :)**_


	16. Chapter 16 Skyfall

_**My dear readers, **_

_**I will start by wishing you all a very Merry Christmas! I hope Santa brings you joy, happiness and all the presents that you want. On another note, I apologise for not posting for so long. Uni has been so crazy this semester and I finally found a bit of time to write another chapter. The title is inspired from Adele's amazing single "Skyfall". I hope you enjoy chapter 16! Please believe me, I do try to write as often as possible. I love writing but unfortunately time is always against me... I wish you all the best!**_

_**Caroline**_

* * *

**CHAPTER 16 - SKYFALL**

* * *

**Elena's POV**

_*October 2012*_

I woke up the next day with the biggest headache of my life. As I opened my eyes I took one look at my room and furrowed my eyebrows as I saw my white 1920s dress neatly placed on my desk. The room was a bit dark because of the closed curtains but it must have been around noon as I caught a glimpse of the sun up in the sky already. Surprise overwhelmed me when I noticed that Damon was peacefully sleeping on my couch. Confusion turned into numbness as reality kicked in and all of last night's events came swirling into my head. I just wanted to put my head in the pillow and scream until my lungs would hurt. But I knew I couldn't do that again. I wasn't the same Elena that I had been 9 months ago. I had changed. Mason had made that happen...

There was only one way to wake up from this. Get up, get dressed and move on. It was the only thing that would keep me sane right now... Falling into depression again wasn't the key. Especially since I knew what it had made of me the last time. I threw the blanket off me as I quietly stepped out of bed. I tiptoed to my bathroom carefully closing the door behind me. I was lucky Damon was a heavy sleeper. As I gazed in the mirror, my reflection startled me deeply. Underneath my eyes I could distinctively see purple bags. Overall I looked like I had been hit by a train...

I exited the bathroom as soon as I could just so that I couldn't see my face in the mirror anymore. I stopped right as I was entering my room. I stopped to admire him... my knight in shining armour who came to rescue me from my past. I couldn't help but stare at him again and again as the sun was shining on his beautiful face... Who was I kidding? I liked him – no. I was attracted to him... big time. He was just so different from any other guy I had met before – and not just because of his glamorous life; but because of his personality. But then again, he was more complicated than any other guy... Mason was nothing compared to Damon. Him – I couldn't figure out so easily, Damon would always surprise me with his actions, he was so unpredictable in everything he did. Although I had lived in his house for 5 months I still couldn't say I had known him properly. So many layers underneath that beautiful facade of his...

So much goodness he had in his heart especially since he didn't kick me out of his home for what had happened with Rebekah... It had been my fault, I had just been too stubborn to admit it to myself not only to him. I knew I had made a huge mistake with the papparazzi. But then again a pattern was forming... and I didn't like how it felt to realise it. Before I could break down again and wake Damon up I ran to the bathroom and thoroughly washed my face with ice cold water.

When I opened my eyes to look at my in the mirror I was stunned. My chest tightened as I realised the mirror was full of red paint... And then shock filled me upon seeing my hands filled with red paint as well. The moment I understood the paint was actually blood I felt my legs moving backwards and staring at my hands in shock. My entire being was trembling as I started hearing Mason's voice shouting "How could you, Elena?" over and over again. I tried to block the sound by putting my hands against my ears; it worked eventually but by the time the voice had gone away I opened my eyes and felt I was in a true nightmare.

Blood had filled up my entire bathroom. But that was not what made me scream – it was a message on the mirror... It wrote "Killer."

**DAMON's POV**

Hearing Elena's scream made me instantly wake up and reach the bathroom door in a heartbeat. When I forcefully pulled the door open, I didn't expect to see the scene that was unfolding in front of my eyes...

Dressed in her white night gown, Elena was barely standing straight from all the trembling; she was crying, seemed desperate because of something I couldn't understand. The strangest part was that she was wiping her mirror with a random wet towel; but she was doing it so forcefully, so desperately it seemed like her life depended on it. She didn't turn around although she had probably heard me coming in.

"Elena..." I started in a gentle voice, afraid that I would scare her. She kept doing the same mechanical action without looking at me at all. She burst into tears though after I said her name. I slowly began walking towards her. The moment I gently grabbed both her shoulders she seemed to relax a bit although she never stopped wiping the mirror.

"Are you ok?" That seemed to wake her up from that trance. With tears in her eyes she smiled and said.

"Yes. I just need to wipe off this mess." I blankly stared at the mirror which had nothing on it. This whole thing seemed off.

"It's funny how hard blood is to wipe off." I felt fear coursing through me upon hearing her say those words in such a natural tone. And I didn't get scared too easily – not after my wife had killed herself. I looked at the mirror again.

"Honey, there's nothing there..." I said squeezing her shoulders. Her hand wouldn't stop though – kept wiping the mirror although she could barely stand. The wheezing sound from her chest started forming but she seemed to completely ignore it.

"You have to stop, Elena..." She shook her head crying even more and wiping even more fervently. And then I realized she was imagining it – she was in shock after last night.

"Please... Listen to me...this isn't real. Don't let it bring you down like this. It's not real, Elena! It's just a nightmare..." Luckily for both of us my words must have gotten to her cause she abruptly stopped her action; then seemed to stare at her reflection until she finally dropped the towel in the sink.

"Breathe, Elena..." I whispered in her ear and she obeyed my request. I felt her body melting into my arms so I simply took her in my arms and carried her back to the bed.

My heart filled with sorrow as I took in her state. So fragile, so broken... Her pretty little face and her slim childish figure made her so angelic... But her eyes revealed the truth... They seemed bloodshot - probably from all the crying. I felt so helpless, didn't know how to make this easier for her. I questioned her mental sanity just for a split second. She didn't seem crazy – she had listened to me. But she had clearly had a hallucination otherwise I couldn't explain the episode in the bathroom.

I stayed next to her caressing her cheeks, forehead and hair whilst she silently suffered. I could see it in her eyes, in her short breaths. In the way she was asking for my help without actually saying the words. She needed someone – she had made that clear the other night; and I had promised never to abandon her again. And I wasn't planning to. Although I didn't know how to help I stayed next to her the whole time, letting her grief – her mother, her father, her brother, Mason...and most of all, her unborn child... Because I knew that deep down she was hurting because of that.

I couldn't blame her – for anything that that scumbag had said about her – whether it was true or false I could never blame her. In my eyes, she would still be an angel – even if she wasn't physically pure and innocent; deep down I felt that she was a much better person than she thought of herself; she was a much better human being than me – that was for sure. I had so many sins that I could never be cynical and condemn her for hers. Because I knew that I loved her... With all my heart; I had fallen helplessly in love with this fragile, broken person.

In a way she reminded me of Katherine. But she was just so different – she hadn't demanded special care after all the bad things she had gone through; she had put up with my crappy behaviour (which I was now even more ashamed of) for two whole months; and she had taken care of my children better than anyone could have. The only thing I could blame her for was that she didn't love me – I knew she didn't. But I didn't care; I wasn't going to lose her or abandon her for anything in the world – especially not when she was in this state...

She looked me in the eye once in a while that unfortunate morning, silently thanking me that I was there for her, that I hadn't left her alone. She eventually fell into a deep sleep and I was extremely happy for her, poor soul. This time I was there for her. Not because I loved her... But because she deserved it; after everything that she had gone through in her life she needed someone to care and be there for her. So I was...

She seemed fine – did everything perfectly as usual, got out of bed, took care of my kids, went out to do her hobbies. But what no one else could see I did. Because I was there for her in the next weeks... Every time she woke up in the morning screaming because of a bad dream... when she would throw up the food I tried to make her eat... and even when she would run to her room to cry, hiding from Jenna, Elijah and my children. I never let her hide from me though. And so did two weeks of our lives go by... Elena taking care of my children and me taking care of her... I never regretted any second of it though.

But there was a moment when I realised I couldn't handle it all myself. That I needed someone's help when it came to her... The moment I caught her looking at the ocean with a stare in her eye that I had only seen once in my life...the same look as my wife's expression a few hours before she had committed suicide... I didn't know Elena inside out, that I will be honest about. I had no idea about her desire to live or her past relating to that subject... But I knew one thing – I wasn't ashamed to admit I wasn't equipped to take care of her well enough. So I decided to do something drastic; I didn't know if she would hate me for it but I couldn't let her go down the deep end like Katherine had.

So I picked up the phone and called Rose Dobbs.

* * *

**ELENA's POV**

_*2 weeks later* _

It was 7.48 a.m. and the clock was ticking. The sandwiches weren't ready, the children's uniforms were getting wrinkled because I had forgotten all about ironing and the whole morning was turning into a disaster. A regular Monday morning in the Salvatore house...

"Eleeeeeennnnaaaa!" Anna shrieked using the full force of her lungs.

"What happened?!" I replied freaked out of my mind. I turned around in an instant and saw Anna with a big stain on her freshly cleaned shirt.

"Tyler threw tomatoes at me!" And the waterworks began. I turned to look at a very innocent Tyler who shouted back.

"No, I didn't! She's a big fat liar!" Tyler angrily replied. Hearing this, Anna stopped crying and violently grabbed the bottle of ketchup off the table. Luckily enough, I got to her and snatched the bottle of out her hand right before she could squirt it on Tyler's shirt. She seemed surprised and angry at me; I on the other hand was extremely relieved. Another disaster averted...

"Both of you please stop..." I calmly said, trying not to lose my temper. Having to deal with them was usually ok but today they seemed out of control.

"He started it!" Anna shouted.

"I don't care. It doesn't matter who started it. You're already late for school. Behave please." It was bad enough that they were in this mood. Jenna was nowhere in sight to help me out.

"Morning." Rebekah greeted me whilst coming inside the kitchen. She had been acting a bit weird around me since my collapse a couple of weeks ago. She seemed a bit weary this morning as well.

"Hey." I replied and went back to getting the sandwiches ready.

"Are you ok?" Rebekah asked concern all across her face. She was witnessing the whole scene in the kitchen.

"Yeah, I'm dealing with it."

"Need any help?" She kindly offered.

"Ummm..." That actually didn't sound bad. Before I could answer...

"Good morning everybody!" Damon's cheer made me drop the knife I was cutting the salami with right on my left-hand thumb. I instantly winced in pain but was too stunned to even move.

"Oh my God. Are you alright?" Damon was next to me in an instant holding his thumb on mine to stop the bleeding. He was really helpful. His eyes full of worry were distracting me from the pain.

"I'm fine." I could barely mutter in response.

"Come on. Come with me." He anxiously replied as he dragged me to the sink.

"Seriously, Damon, I'm ok." I tried to reassure him of it. He didn't seem convinced at all.

"Rebekah, can you please give me a plaster from the bottom cupboard?" Damon was very serious about it all. Cold water started flowing on my wound.

"Rebekah, don't." I turned to her and gently asked her. "If you want to help me, please get a clean shirt for Anna. You can find it on the middle shelf of her wardrobe." Damon suddenly turned to me and looked as if I was mad. He raised his eyebrows in answer. I felt like a little child bewitched by his beauty.

"Rebekah, get the plaster honey." He was ignoring my wish.

"Please help me with Anna, Rebekah. Forget the plaster." Before Damon could reply I turned and stared into his eyes. They were light blue today.

"I can take care of myself, Damon. But the kids are already late. Jenna isn't here... and you know what the punishment for having a dirty uniform is." My tone started off firm but then turned mellow as I started staring at his lips. I briefly wondered what they tasted like today. Rebekah's voice made me jump as if she had unveiled my little secret.

"As much as I love seeing the two of you bicker" - her voice was sarcastic - "I do consider my time precious, you know." Damon's expression made me want to giggle. He looked at his daughter as if she was looking to get grounded.

"Charming..." Damon muttered to his daughter. He then turned his attention to me and briefly scanned my face.

"Go help Anna change, Rebekah." He seemed to have given in.

"Great." It didn't take a genius to figure out that Rebekah was rolling her eyes in disapproval. Nonetheless she took Anna and left. Tyler followed them but went to the living room instead to watch TV. Everything was officially a mess today.

Damon made his way to the cupboard and got back with a pack full of plasters. He ripped a piece of tissue and retrieved my freezing thumb from the cold water.

"Give it to me, I can do it." I firmly said.

"No, let me." He was so gentle with me.

"Damon..." My stubbornness got the best of me though.

"Elena!" He loudly said to stop me. "You almost cut your fingers to get my kids' sandwiches ready. The least I can do is apply first aid..." God, was his voice always this seductive? I fell into his trap so easily. My hand melted in his as he wiped the water away.

"You played your father role very well earlier. Rebekah listened to you." What was wrong with me? I had such a sweet flirtatious tone. Luckily for me, Damon didn't notice.

"Yeah, that's something new. You're playing your nanny role very well yourself." He meant that as a compliment. He knew I had been a bit on the edge lately. I suddenly got filled with remorse.

"Thank you." I gently said without taking my eyes off his lips.

"You're welcome." He very naturally said, thinking I was thanking him for the plaster. Before I could reply Elijah came into the kitchen.

"Miss Elena, it's time to leave otherwise I will never get them to school on time." He seemed a bit uncomfortable to see Damon and me standing so close next to each other. I quickly pretended nothing was going on, nodded at Elijah and thanked Damon for the plaster. I got back to making sandwiches and packing them.

"Don't worry – just put them in their bags; they can eat them on their way to school." Damon reassured me and smiled. I couldn't say anything but smile back.

What I wanted the most was to tell him, though, was _Thank you. For taking care of me in the past weeks. I really appreciate all of your help, Damon._ Those words didn't come out of my mouth though...

* * *

**DAMON's POV**

_*The afternoon of the same day*_

"Elena, can I come in?" I said after knocking on her bedroom door. Her reply was immediate.

"Of course." Before I could even reach the handle, the door flew open and there was Elena, looking pink in the cheeks and very nervous about something. I wondered if it was my presence doing that to her. I quickly erased that thought. Don't be silly Damon...

"That was fast." I watched her reaction very carefully. She simply smiled and said.

"Please come in." Her room was impeccable. I couldn't help but gasp at the sight of her tidy room. That was a big change from the previous two weeks of chaos that governed her room. She seemed to be slowly recuperating.

"Thank you. May I sit?" I meant the couch. She timidly nodded and I knew that was my cue to sit down. Elena was fidgeting, not knowing whether she should sit down or keep standing. She seemed like a 16-year-old girl. Her childish way was endearing. She finally chose to sit on the bed, a good 3 metres away from me.

"So... I assume you want to talk to me about something." She expectantly asked.

"Can't your boss come and see how you are doing once in a while?" I asked in an unintentional flirtatious way.

"Of course you can, Damon..." God, she was so gorgeous today in her purple top and tight jeans...

"So how are you?" I asked trying to ignore her curves.

"I'm good. Better - thanks to you..." And she lifted her hand with the bandaged thumb.

"I'm glad." It felt like our words had a double meaning but I wasn't sure.

"How come you're not at the firm today?" She asked realising it was a Monday afternoon.

"Well, I had some news to share with you." Her mouth slightly opened in response. She seemed puzzled.

"What news?" I couldn't wait to catch her every reaction.

"Before I go on, Elena, I do hope you won't be mad about the whole thing." She immediately tensed, a weird glow catching fire in her eyes.

"What is it?" Elena seemed scared.

"It's something that will hopefully bring you a lot of joy." Relaxation but more confusion followed on her beautiful face.

"I don't follow..." That's when I got up and slowly walked to the door with a cunning smile plastered on my face.

"All will be revealed in due time, Elena." She smiled in response.

"You have a surprise for me?" Her reaction was endearing. Just like a child's. I couldn't help but contribute to her growing excitement.

"Follow me." I said and opened the door beckoning her to follow.

"What are you up to, Damon Salvatore?" Her playful tone caught me off guard. She seemed to enjoy this. Not as much as I enjoyed seeing her smile.

"I solemnly swear that I am up to no good." And with a smile I walked down the corridor. I could hear her following me. We got to the ground floor and I opened the front door widely enough so that everything on the driveway could be seen.

I turned to look at Elena; seeing her expression go from shock to scepticism and then to utter joy. I saw her running down the stairs to meet her best friend's wide-open arms. They both span around in circles and cried with happiness after not seeing each other for 6 months. I felt I was invading a most private moment of Elena's life but I couldn't stop admiring her. This was the first time I had seen her this ecstatic in the past weeks. Her joy made me immensely happy. And just when I thought she had forgotten about the whole world she lovingly looked at me and silently uttered the words _"Thank you."_

**ELENA's POV**

I couldn't get over the shock of seeing Bonnie in my boss's house. It felt like a dream I couldn't wake up of. It was simply surreal to witness her and Damon interacting as well – after telling her all the stories about him.

"Thank you so much again for receiving me in your house Mr. Salvatore."

"You have nothing to thank me for, Bonnie. Any friend of Elena's is a friend of ours." Damon said looking at me.

"You have a... breathtaking home sir." You could tell in an instant that Bonnie had never had a wealthy life by her reaction.

"Thank you. We like it." My boss said and grinned at her.

"One thing I need to ask of you. Please call me Damon. Mr. Salvatore makes me sound... too old for my taste." His smile was electrifying; he was winning Bonnie over.

"Ok. Damon..." Bonnie said timidly smiling back.

"Now, Bonnie, please make yourself feel like home here. There are no limits but... I don't condone over-drinking and... please don't teach my kids any swear-words. They already know enough of those." We both laughed in response and I couldn't help but whisper to Bonnie's ear.

"He means Rebekah." And although he was leaving the bedroom in order to give us some privacy, I was surprised by his reply.

"I heard that!" He jokingly said and then closed the door, leaving me and Bonnie to stare at each other. I couldn't help but hug her again. It was unbelievable having her with me again. It seemed like such a miracle.

"How come you came? Don't get me wrong, I'm thrilled that you're here. But it's just such a big surprise..."

"Well, I had some days off that I hadn't taken last year and when Mrs Dobbs heard I wanted to come see you for a change she immediately agreed to let me off the hook for a while."

"That's incredible. How is she by the way?" I really missed her.

"Oh, you know Cruella... Same old, same old..." Bonnie said laughing.

"Bonnie!"

"Well, ok... Let me see. She got a new haircut – looks a bit more terrestrial now; no more loose locks."

"You haven't changed at all..." I replied giggling.

"It's a gift... but, honestly now, I don't think she's doing too great." That didn't sound good.

"How come?!"

"Well, she seems lonely; she's been getting worse since her divorce this summer..." I had heard about that.

"Can't really blame her, can you?"

"No... but you know her. She's just taking up more and more work. She was actually telling me something about extending the company."

"That does sound like Rose Dobbs... I'll probably give her a call after you leave. Just to check on her."

"I'm sure she'd love that."

"But anyway... how long are you staying for?" That's when Bonnie's eyes got really excited.

"Well, about ten days. My flight is next Thursday." Good news indeed!

"That's fantastic! I want to show you everything L.A. has to offer. And introduce you to the kids as well..."

"I can't wait. I've really missed you, Elena."

"So have I, best friend." I took her hands in mine.

"You know what's really fantastic?" Bonnie asked.

"The fact that Damon let me stay here with you..." I didn't know what to say. In my head, Damon must have been relieved when Bonnie called him up to ask if she could visit. Relived to get rid of depressed Elena for a while... Bonnie was giving me a weird look. Probably because I hadn't replied yet.

"He knew it would make us happy..." I couldn't tell her anything about what he'd done for me cause I never told her about Mason paying me a visit. There was no point. She couldn't do anything about it.

"I think he knew it would make **you** happy..." The way Bonnie said that sentence made me blush. But then right before I could ask her an important question we were interrupted by a knock on the door.

"Miss Elena?" I went and opened the door happy to see kind polite Elijah again.

"Yes, Elijah?"

"Sorry to disturb you, I just wanted to let you know that I left Miss Bonnie's bags in the guestroom." He said and smiled to Bonnie again as well.

"That's great, Elijah. Thank you so much."

"For everything..." Bonnie added.

"No problem. Jenna was asking if our guest wanted anything to drink? Or if she was hungry?"

"Oh, no, thank you. I'm fine, ate loads of bad food on the plane." Bonnie said giggling.

"I think we'll come down to get some juice. How does a strawberry milkshake sound?"

"Like heaven."

So we went downstairs where Bonnie got to meet Jenna as well. She loved Jenna from the second they shook hands. You just couldn't dislike Jenna – she had so many maternal instincts in her that she made everybody feel loved. It was a shame that she had no kids really. But she was about the same age as Damon, probably a bit older. She still had time. I silently hoped that she would one day find love.

"So what do you like eating, Bonnie?" Jenna kindly asked.

"Anything, really..." Bonnie politely replied.

"Well, I wanted to cook something special for you tonight. Any favourite dish..?"

"Not really, anything you make will be fine." Jenna sighed.

"Oh, God... It's like having Elena around the house all over again. Are you sure you're not twin sisters?" We all laughed.

"Come on, at least let me help you with the milkshakes."

"It's fine, Jenna. If you really wanna help, would you mind checking on John?"

"I'll do that." And with that, she left. After a small pause I turned to Bonnie.

"You look exactly the same." I said stroking her beautiful hair.

"Well, it's only been 6 months... It probably takes more for me to become an old lady."

"What are you talking about? Don't be silly... You look gorgeous. Especially your skin..."

"Oh come on, Elena..." I was embarassing her.

"No, honestly... tell me your secret. Are you eating some incredible rejuvenating syrup?" She seemed to pause for a second seeming unsure whether she should say anything to me but then she cunningly smiled to me.

"No, of course not... What's wrong? Why are you asking me all of these questions?" I sighed in return.

"Well...look at me. Take a long look. I bet you can see what effect four children have had on me." She looked at me as if I was crazy.

"You look just the same." That ship had sailed 5 months ago...

"Regardless, I still want you to tell me your secret."

"Well, I sleep more than you probably do...but fine... Elena, you can't tell anyone though..." She leaned towards me and whispered in my ear. "I've started using night cream." I burst into laughter at hearing her reply and jokingly hit her arm.

"You witch."

"You know me well." We were startled by the sound of the front door opening and all of a sudden Rebekah magically appeared in the kitchen. She seemed confused by Bonnie's presence. I take it Damon hadn't told her about our guest.

"Hey honey. How come you're home so early from school?"

"I didn't go to school today, remember?" Events clicked in my mind.

"Oh, yeah, you had that field trip. How was it?" She seemed annoyed.

"Boring to say the least... Who are you?" She directly asked Bonnie, seeming very reluctant.

"Oh, sorry about that. Rebekah, I want you to meet someone who is **very special** to me." I said and put one hand around Bonnie's shoulders.

"Ok." She replied seeming very surprised.

"This is Bonnie." Rebekah studied her for a second but then wholeheartedly said:

"Nice to meet you Bonnie." ...and shook her hand. Bonnie seemed happy.

"It's a pleasure to finally meet you too, Rebekah. I've heard loads about you."

"I **bet** you have..." She said cunningly smiling and giving me a nasty look.

"All good, I assure you..." Bonnie quickly added.

"See, now I know you're lying." We all burst into laughter. Rebekah was in a really good mood.

"Come on, sweetie. You know I care about you." I said briefly caressing her hair. She nodded. "I have missed Bonnie a lot though. Haven't seen her since May... Am really happy she's come to visit."

"Yeah, I couldn't stay away for too long." Bonnie said and gave me a loving look.

"I can't believe I never figured it out before..." Rebekah kept looking at me and Bonnie in a very weird way...

"Figure out what?" I asked, amused by her weird behaviour.

"That you had a girlfriend..." Bonnie choked on her smoothie upon hearing Rebekah's words. I felt like my face would fall off. Rebekah did seem to have that effect on me pretty often.

"Rebekah!" I said feeling incredibly outraged and embarassed.

"Hey, don't worry. I'm not judging. I'm actually a bit relieved." What was she on about?

"Honey, Bonnie and I are not together... nor do we like women for that matter." I was talking slowly to make sure Rebekah understood. "Bonnie is my best friend... We are **not** together." Rebekah seemed very confused.

"And I can confirm that." Bonnie added giggling.

"I don't understand. **Why** are you here then?" Ok, this was getting embarrassing.

"She's here because she's my best friend." Rebekah's reaction was rude and direct.

"But she's a stranger to all of us." I was getting angrier by the second. Especially by her accusing tone.

"That's true, but your dad said she could stay here for a couple of weeks." Her expression changed to anger.

"He did, didn't he? So, what? Now we're supposed to host anybody that is remotely close to you? Have we become a public hotel?"

"What is the matter with you?" I asked her feeling attacked.

"Elena, it's fine... Just drop it." Bonnie said trying to prevent us from quarreling.

"Stay out of this Bonnie."

"Yeah, why don't you pack and **leave**, Bonnie? And take **this one** with you?" She was pointing at me. Now I was really hurt. And then I just exploded.

"I don't get it... **What do I have to do to make you like me?!**" I was shouting and felt like crying. Rebekah seemed taken aback by my reaction.

"Why are you so much against me? Especially after everything we've been through. Why, Rebekah? WHY?" She remained as cold as before and slowly said to my face.

"Don't you get it, Elena? We don't want you here. We don't need your **services** anymore..." She was treating me as if I was a maid; as if I was dirt to her.

"We would **all** be better off without you in our lives..." She said with such an ice-cold voice that I felt my blood freeze in my veins. I couldn't understand what had made her hate me again like this. I just didn't get it. She had managed to do it again – leave me speechless. This time she had also managed to make me cry in front of her.

"Rebekah.. Isabella.. Salvatore." My skin got filled with goose bumps as I heard Damon's threatening voice. His daughter just turned around to look at her father, only resentment present in her eyes. I couldn't even look at him... or imagine Bonnie's expression. I was simply staring at the stove hoping this was all a sick twisted dream.

"If I didn't know you better I would say you were raised by savages." Damon sounded disappointed.

"Let's skip the drama for today, shall we, father?" Rebekah replied in her usual arrogant tone.

"Young lady, I think you don't realise how thick-skinned you are right now." Damon said dropping Rebekah's schoolbag on the floor with a thud.

"Perhaps it's because I don't care."

"You don't care?" Her answer had clearly taken Damon by surprise.

"Not anymore. Because Elena has become your favourite person in this house... You did not bother to ask me or anyone else if we were ok with her friend coming over. By doing that, you just put Elena's needs and desires in front of your own children's..." Damon didn't deserve this. Why was she torturing her own dad like this?

"Funny how you think you know everything, Rebekah." Damon's voice sounded hurt.

"Am I wrong about anything I've said?" There was a pause on Damon's side. "I didn't think so." So much venom in her voice... Something had clearly happened to make her act this way.

"Last time I checked I was still your father. And you **will** respect me in my own house." Damon slowly walked towards Rebekah seeming truly menacing. Rebekah actually seemed scared.

"Apologize to Elena." He demanded. She huffed in response.

"Elena... Of course you're defending her. Like you've always done from the moment she set foot in this house." Her words were so ridiculous to me. As she tried to run past Damon, he violently grabbed her hand and looked her in the eye as if he was going to kill her.

"You are not getting out of apologising no matter what you say." She was clearly getting on his nerves. I couldn't blame him.

"So this is how it's gonna be from now on... Elena first and me second..." I winced realising the secret. So that's why she was mad at us.

"Apologize right now." Damon said and let go of her hand.

"Damon, stop. I don't need an apology." He looked me in the eye seeming angry with me.

"And you stop protecting her, Elena. She has to grow up at a certain point. Come on, apologise, young lady... Now!"

She turned around to look me in the eye. Something in her changed and she surprisingly seemed to look at me with care.

"Here's my apology... You wanna know why dad let Bonnie stay here, Elena?" She seemed defeated and hurt.

"Because he's in love with you..."

And with that, Rebekah turned her back on us and left. She left us all with our mouths hanging slightly open. The seconds that passed by were so quiet that the only thing we could hear was the clock on the wall which was ticking as usual. None of us could speak. What was there to say really? That the situation was embarassing - out of the ordinary? It truly was. The thing that was bothering me the most was Rebekah's last phrase. _"Because he's in love with you." _ That phrase kept ringing in my ears and I couldn't shut it off. I finally looked towards Damon and he seemed stunned. He was probably ashamed and very very angry. I pitied him. He didn't deserve this... All of a sudden Damon broke the silence. His voice was hurt.

"I apologize deeply for how my daughter just behaved. I'll make sure she gets punished for treating you both with so much disrespect." Damon caught me looking him in the eye and he realized I was thinking about Rebekah's words. He chose to look away.

"Please excuse me." And with that, Damon left as well, leaving me wondering how my day could have been so ruined in just 3 and a half minutes.

"Wow... so... that's Rebekah..." Bonnie exclaimed obviously still being shocked. I took the waste from the milkshakes, opened the bin, threw everything in and released the lid to fall. I turned to Bonnie and looked her in the eye, not even trying to hide my emotions.

"Welcome to the Salvatore house."

* * *

**BONNIE's POV**

I couldn't believe everything that I had just heard. Damon was in love with Elena? I must say, it hadn't come like a complete shock to me... The moment Damon called me two days ago to say Elena needed my help, I realized he cared about her enough to buy me a ticket to L.A. and let me stay in his house just so that I can make her feel better. I appreciated his gesture more than anything he could ever give me. But hearing his daughter talk about Damon like that made me really wonder whether she was telling the truth.

I couldn't see any reason why she would lie. But then again, she didn't seem like the nicest of children. My thoughts were interrupted by Elena pacing up and down her bedroom seeming more worried and nervous than ever. I decided to end her misery.

"Elena." She suddenly stopped and turned towards me. She looked off.

"Are you ok?"

"No." She said and kept shaking her head.

"No, I'm not bloody ok. Did you hear what she said to me?" She was clearly upset. I couldn't blame her.

"I did..." She started gesticulating a lot.

"She said that Damon is **in love with me**." Her voice came out all squeaky.

"Yeah, that's exactly what she said..." Elena was shaking her head in disbelief.

"That's just ridiculous." But there was a part of her that...hoped it wasn't.

"Is it really?" I couldn't help but ask. She had a very bad reaction.

"Oh, no. Please don't put ideas in my head Bonnie. That's the last thing I need." She looked as if she was gonna cry again.

"I'm not. But..."

"What?!" It wasn't worth saying it out loud.

"Just forget it."

"Tell me." Ah, good old stubborn Elena...

"Every time he looks at you his eyes seem to glow." I said. Elena started biting her lip.

"No, that can't be." She seemed desperate.

"Calm down. Elena, do you have feelings for him?" My question caught her off guard.

"I don't know what I feel." She honestly replied.

"But if he really is in love with me, what does that even mean?"

"It means you can let yourself feel something for him as well. I can tell you've been holding it in for months." Her reaction confirmed my suspicions. My friend came and sat next to me on the bed.

"Bonnie, this is crazy... He's a famous Hollywood actor; a widower with four kids. And my boss... You know who **I** am? A babysitter. A woman who had an abortion earlier this year. And his employee... That is **all** I can ever be for him." Elena seemed very decided about this.

"It doesn't have to be like that if fate wants you two to be together."

"We could never be together anyway." She seemed hard to shake.

"Why not? Elena, you deserve a fairytale-kind-of love. Maybe this is it." Her eyes seemed sad but resigned.

"Rebekah would never agree to us being together... You can see how much it hurts her that Damon put me first - even if it was for such an insignificant matter. And although Damon defended me today, if he had to choose between his daughter and me... well, it doesn't take a genius to figure out he would never pick me." I was speechless; had no idea what to tell her.

Wow, Elena was really caught between a rock and a hard place in this house, wasn't she? I really felt sorry for my best friend. I could tell she really fancied Damon, that he was good for her. I was also sure half of the reason she didn't want to love again was because of the disappointment that Mason had brought her. And apart from all of the obvious reasons why her and Damon weren't meant to be, his daughter had to mettle in their relationship as well...

The tragic part was that Damon and Elena really seemed to be good together.

And if they would ever actually be together, I could predict one thing – they wouldn't have it easy...

* * *

**_Thank you for reading my new chapter. I cannot wait to hear your comments! So please REVIEW (: (: !_**


	17. Chapter 17 She will be loved

_**Author's note: Thank you once again for your wonderful reviews and your faith in my story, my dear readers! I got so excited about this chapter that I haven't had enough patience to go through it three times like I usually do. So please pardon any grammar mistakes that you find inside this chapter. My gift to you is a very long chapter full of action :) I really hope you enjoy it because I have had the time of my life writing it! By the way, cannot wait to see the new episode of TVD - the last three episodes brought me immense happiness because the writers are finally bringing Damon and Elena together. Anyway, the new chapter is named after Maroon 5's gorgeous song "She will be loved." **_  
_**ENJOY!**_

* * *

**CHAPTER 17 – SHE WILL BE LOVED**

* * *

31st October 2012 (Halloween)

**ELENA's POV**

I was standing outside the door wondering if I was doing the right thing after all. It had been two days since the whole scene in the kitchen when Rebekah had told me her father was in love with me. It was unnerving how so many things could go wrong today. Because, you see, I had a plan in mind. I wouldn't have done this in a usual situation but Rebekah's hurt feelings and mood swings were definitely making both mine and Damon's lives harder. So I had made a decision. And so I was standing in front of Rebekah's door hoping she wouldn't turn me down. I knocked briefly knowing for sure that she was in there.

She came straight to the door without asking who it was and opened it. She didn't seem surprised to see me.

"Hi." She greeted me with a sad smile on her face.

"Hey…" I smiled back.

"Do you wanna come in?"

"No, thank you. I just… wanted to talk to you." My words had surprised her now.

"About what?"

"Ummm… Can you wait five minutes until you find out?" She pondered for a brief second and then replied.

"Sure. So, if you're not coming in, do you wanna go to your room?"

"Actually I was thinking of another place." I said and couldn't help the smile that was forming.

Five minutes later we were both on the beach slowly walking away from the house. This time I had told everybody but Damon where we were going. I felt I was betraying him again but in earnest I wasn't really doing anything wrong this time. Rebekah was indeed grounded but Damon was at work so I had a few hours until he got back home. The normally bright sky was now filled with clouds. A perfect day for Halloween…

"You're gonna get in trouble for this." Rebekah said in a thoughtful tone. I knew she meant her father.

"I don't really care this time." She came to a halt and turned to look at me. Her beautiful green eyes seemed very confused.

"Why not?" She asked me.

"Because you risked a lot of things to tell me that little secret the other day… And I wanted to thank you." she immediately knew what I meant; and actually seemed a bit ashamed.

"You're thanking me? Why?"

"Because you showed a lot of courage by saying that in front of your dad."

"Yeah, and got grounded for it."

"Well, I guess it wasn't the best way to say it..."

"I'm sorry, Elena."

"What for?"

"For insulting you the way I did. Dad's right, you don't deserve it." Hearing her kind words made my heart grow a bit more.

"It's ok."

"I don't know what got into me…" Rebekah said staring at the ocean.

"But I do." She instantly turned her head to face me, her expression puzzled.

"I need to tell you some things, Rebekah."

"About…?"

"Your father…"

"I half-expected that."

"Really?"

"Well, it doesn't take a genius to figure out that you have feelings of some sort for him…"

"You're a really smart girl." I replied smiling. "Too smart for your own good sometimes…" She smiled as well.

"So? Am I wrong? Are you in love with him as well?"

"I don't really know how I feel about him."

"Quatsch." Rebekah immediately replied in German. Quatsch simply meant Bullshit.

"I half-expected that." I said feeling resigned.

"Yeah, well, I don't like it when people lie to me. Liar, liar, pants on fire…" She replied but wasn't angry.

"I'm not lying to you honey." I said in my sincerest voice.

"Then you're lying to yourself." I was taken aback by Rebekah's words. Was I actually lying to myself? I would have to think about that later.

"Why do you say that?" I couldn't help but ask.

"Come on, Elena! I see many things that you can't. The way you smile to dad – so different from how you smile to the rest of us... The way you glance in his direction when you think he's not looking. And how most of the time you can't say no to him no matter what..." I had no reply. Was I that blind to everything surrounding me?

"Whether you like it or not, I think you definitely feel something for him."

"That remains to be seen."

"What are you on about?"

"Rebekah… Nothing is gonna happen between your father and me." Her expression turned into confusion.

"I don't get it. I thought you…cared about him." How could I explain this to a 12-year-old? I embraced myself for what I was about to say.

"I do care… And I find him the most interesting and good man I have ever met. He makes my life worthwhile… makes me happy to be alive again. And…whenever I need him, Damon is there for me - more than any other man would. And that means the world to me; especially after my past experiences…"

"Are you talking about that Mason guy?"

"How in God's name did you find out about him?" I asked, desperation evident in my tone. Rebekah bit her lip.

"I overheard you talking to Bonnie about him on the phone a few months ago… I presumed he was your ex."

"Oh." Part of me was wondering whether she knew about his visit as well. But I decided I didn't want to know…it would make this whole conversation much harder.

"I'm sorry about that as well… I shouldn't have been eavesdropping. And I don't know what he did to you… but I'm sure he's a complete ass for hurting you." I couldn't believe how mature Rebekah was about this.

"Thanks…"

"Look, forget about what I said. I didn't want to hurt you. But I don't get it, Elena. If dad is so good for you why are you having second thoughts about him?"

"Because of you…" I said and couldn't look her in the eye. Her silence encouraged me to carry on. "You don't get it Rebekah but… you're one of the most important people in his life. You're his daughter; his blood runs through your veins. And you look just like your mother…" I didn't know how to carry on but I also knew I couldn't stop.

"I can't let myself fall for him if you don't want me in your lives."

"That's silly… I've never heard of a woman wanting to be with dad and caring about how I felt."She replied.

"It's not silly and you know it… Because if you don't approve of me…then he will have to choose between us…"

"And you think he would choose me over you…"

"I'm **positive** that he would choose you. As I said, he loves you more than anything. And I wouldn't want it any other way."

"So what are you saying exactly?"

"To be honest, I have no idea what's going to happen with your dad and me. I'm not sure he really is in love with me or that I could ever have the same feelings for him… But if something ever does happen between us I need to know that you won't drive me away. I need to know that you won't hate me or try to tear us apart… Because if I fall for him and you end up breaking our relationship…that would break my heart..." I felt like I was about to cry but held it in.

"I need your approval… Again, I don't know if anything will happen given that I'm just an employee to your dad, but… I need to know if you could ever accept me as your dad's girlfriend."

I finally looked at her; she was staring at the ocean probably thinking about my words. It took her a minute to reply.

"After my mum died I swore that I would never accept another woman as my dad's anything. And I've basically hated the entire female population that comes into contact with dad. Including Jenna, Caroline, all the babysitters that he brought home before he found you. What the hell? I hated you the most; but you know that already…"

"It's not that I don't want dad to be happy, Elena. It's just that… him and mum never really had a happy marriage – I have only one memory of them being happy, the rest are all with them arguing or not speaking to each other. Part of me wishes he never finds someone so that I don't have to go through such a thing again… Part of me doubts every woman that shows interest because of how rich father is. And part of me never wants some woman to come into our lives and pretend that she is my new mother…"

"I know you don't want him for his money though… You're not that kind of person."

"It's funny… I did the exact same thing to my dad after my mother left us… I forbid him to date anybody; hated any woman that I knew was trying to get her hands on him… Nobody was good enough to fill in my mother's shoes and I knew it so well… But I ended up ruining his happiness. I could tell he felt lonely, Rebekah, but I couldn't fight against my hatred. Because by leaving us, my mum made me hate women; as you said as well. So I punished my father for it. I still regret it… Trust me, your dad doesn't deserve that... He's a good man."

"I would never try to be your mother… You have to believe me because I know what it's like. My mum didn't kill herself like yours did but… she may as well have done that. Also, I don't ever want to be a mother."

"Why would you say that?"

"I have my reasons. I need you to trust me on this one though. I would never try to be your mother. Maybe an older sister… or just a friend…but never a mother."

"I believe you."

"And you have my approval, Elena. If something ever does happen with dad, I'll be happy for you both. I appreciate you asking me beforehand. I really shouldn't mettle in my dad's life but… can I tell you something?" After I nodded she continued.

"I want you to be happy no matter if you pick dad or someone else. But, as you said earlier, you should be with the person who makes you glad to be alive."

"And I think the right person for you is dad…"

* * *

2 hours later

**ELENA's POV**

"Why am I just finding out about this now?" Damon's tone was angry and frustrated. I It was weird talking to him again after two whole days of avoiding each other. Something was floating in the air, I could just feel it; and everything was a bit awkward between us, it was so obvious. But now we weren't talking about our feelings for each other; we were talking about Rebekah. And he seemed mad. In earnest, I was expecting this.

"I was worried that you would…"

"I wouldn't let her go out?" _Well, yeah_ I thought and feverishly nodded so as to point the obvious.

"Well, of course. That's what needs to happen. That's what my daughter was supposed to be doing earlier this morning – stay grounded. That child is gonna get a piece of my mind." He said and was prepared to run out the door.

"No… Damon, please leave Rebekah alone. I was the one who dragged her out of the house. I needed to talk to her about something." His eyes shrank as to confirm some of his previous suspicions…

"What about?" He cautiously asked.

"I can't tell you that…" Damn it, my voice was weary, even I knew that.

"Are we back to secret plans and you two going behind my back?" Damon's tone was under control but underneath the surface he was burning.

"No." I firmly replied. "Believe me, there is no plan."

"Well guess what, Elena. Trust works both ways…" Oh, no…

"What are you talking about?"

"You **trust **me; I have to trust you as well." Now I felt hurt.

"You don't trust me?"

"Don't be silly. I trust you. But after the last time, can you blame me for being even a tad suspicious?" My cheeks immediately started burning as I remembered our previous fight.

"You're right. I'm sorry, Damon… But I swear, we're not plotting anything." He seemed to calm down after that.

"Regardless, tell me what you were talking to her about." Lucky me for having agent 007 as a boss...

"About Halloween." I finally confessed. He furrowed his eyebrows confused as to whether I was lying or not. Technically I wasn't; it hadn't been the central theme in our discussion but we **had** talked about that on the way home.

"What about Halloween?" He asked for more explanations. I just had to tell him something otherwise he would be suspicious.

"That I would try to convince you to let her go with her friends to the school Halloween party tonight..." Damon immediately exploded.

"Are you out of your mind?!" He shouted and came towards me. I took a few steps back just as a measure of precaution.

"Look, before you jump to conclusions…" He interrupted me though.

"Tell me, Elena…how am I supposed to deal with a 12-year-old who will not obey me if you – her nanny- keep dodging my decisions and rules?" I already felt guilty for promising Rebekah I would help her.

"Damon, please…"

"You heard her in the kitchen the other day Elena. She is completely out of control! God, I can take her talking to me in that manner but telling you all of that crap and especially when Bonnie was there as well… that is **beyond** humiliating for me as a parent." I was partly hurt by his words and briefly wondered if everything that Rebekah had said was crap or not.

"So that's'what you think her words were? Crap?" I couldn't help but ask. He looked at me as if I was mad.

"Of course it was." He replied as if I was an idiot. "Each and every word. Silly child…" I tried not to think that I had gotten his message wrong once again and concentrated on our current discussion.

"I have already admitted to myself that I am a failure as a parent." He continued his idea. "But I am **not** going to admit it to her, Elena. She needs to grow up and learn how to behave properly. She's a young lady." I nodded, understanding him completely.

"She apologized to me today." I said, not bearing for him to think his daughter was completely bad.

"She… what?! Are you serious?" Damon asked seeming like a train had just hit him. I nodded anxiously awaiting his reaction.

"How in God's name did you manage to get that out of her?" I blushed.

"I have my ways… In earnest, we kind of made a truce. Not to fight anymore." Damon seemed incredulous.

"Unbelievable…"

"I also told her that she never needs to worry that you would be favouring me and not her." His expression changed to understanding. He made his way to the bar to make a bourbon drink. A little too early for that but I guess he needed it.

"So that's what it was all about… God, I raised such a snarky princess…" Damon said and took a sip from his drink.

"Well, at least you guys are getting along." He replied, seeming frustrated. I was surprised to feel my body walking towards Damon.

"Whatever you have to do to make Rebekah grow up, then go ahead – do it! You're entitled to that since you are her father. But just give her some slack tonight, ok?"

"Why?" He answered seeming in the mood to argue. "She's a spoiled little brat and I am the father who needs to teach her how to behave. She gets to become an adult in the process and I get to keep the last shred of dignity that I have as a parent. Win-win…" This conversation was not going in the right direction. I involuntarily reached Damon's arm and grabbed his bicep, holding him quite tightly whilst I begged.

"Damon, please… She's already been through too much for her age. Let her go out with her friends from school. She had already bought a beautiful dress and prepared for tonight. She rarely does that – which means she really wants to go for some reason. And I think it would be good not only for her but to your father-daughter relationship. Come on, show her that you love her and then you can keep her grounded for months if you want. But be the cool dad - just tonight…" I intently stared into his and I saw him gazing back into mine.

"You need to stop doing that." He seriously replied.

"Doing what?" I asked and unwillingly released his arm.

"Assuming that I'll play the good guy because it's you who's asking…" That hurt my feelings even more. Did he think I was using myself to manipulate him?

"Be the better man, Damon…" That was all I could reply. He seemed to think about it and although his face didn't seem happy…

"Fine. She can go if she really wants to. We'll try it your way. But if this backfires, Elena, I swear to God that you are never allowed to tell me how to deal with my daughter again. Deal?" He asked and raised his glass.

"Deal." I said and couldn't help but smile.

"I should go, I need to make sure that the kids' costumes are in check. Tyler was having some problem with his werewolf suit." I was about to leave when Damon stopped me.

"Wait." I turned around – he seemed a bit nervous. "I would love it if you and Bonnie could join Stefan, Caroline and me tonight." Surprise overwhelmed me.

"Join you for what?"

"Big fancy Halloween party. Something we had three extra invitations for and didn't know who to ask really…" He tried to make it sound casual.

"I'm not sure. I would have to ask Bonnie about it." He didn't seem surprised.

"Come on, you actually think she wouldn't wanna go?" Good point there.

"We have no costumes, you know…"

"Oh, I'm sure we can solve that in 25 minutes if we call Caroline and ask her to shop." I actually grinned hearing his reply.

"It does sound tempting…" There was a huge "but" floating in the air though. He tried again.

"The party is the biggest in L.A. you know. Very organized and fun – everybody's gonna be wearing nice colourful costumes. And you know you want to see Stefan in a pink bunny costume, don't you?" As if that was the most important thing for me. Nevertheless, I smiled and appreciated his efforts to convince me. I thought about it…

"I have only one question, Damon." I had clearly caught him off guard; he was expectantly awaiting.

"Are there any paparazzi tonight?" It was his turn to grin, although his smile was a bit more sympathetic. He knew my history with paparazzi wasn't the best.

"None at all…" He firmly replied seeming relieved.

"I guess I can call Caroline about those costumes then." He tried to hide it but he was definitely happy that we were coming. I was truly confused – too many mixed signals from him.

"That sounds great."

"Damon?" I asked before exiting the room. "Thank you for inviting us."

"My pleasure." The only thing I could feel after leaving the room were the butterflies in my stomach and the image of his beautiful grey-blue eyes staring back at me.

Another 2 hours later

**DAMON's POV**

"Eleeeeenaaaaa!" Anna suddenly shouted getting a very sweet and caring Elena really panicked.

"What is it honey?" She ran right to my daughter in a heartbeat.

"My wings aren't staying up straight…"Anna cried looking very cute in her pink fairy costume.

"That's how they are supposed to be, Anna…" Elena replied in a sweet tone. I loved watching Elena deal with my difficult children. She was so good at it…

"No, they aren't. Fairies have big straight wings. I look like a horrible fairy." Anna protested seeming angry at her.

"Oh, shut up already Anna! Nobody cares about your wings…" Tyler walked by and said – perfect timing I might add. Anna was on the verge of replying when Elena stepped in, sensing the danger.

"Now, sweetie, you are a very special kind of fairy. One that doesn't need perfectly straight wings…"

"Why would I not need straight wings?" Elena seemed stuck but then a glimmer of inspiration arose in her eyes.

"Because the other fairies need a head-fairy. A princess-fairy. And the way they can distinguish their leader is by the wings. You certainly knew that, didn't you?" Anna didn't seem convinced.

"That's crap."

"Anna!" I involuntarily shouted. I couldn't believe my ears.

"Where on Eearth did you hear that word?" She seemed scared but answered nonetheless.

"Rebekah…" I rolled my eyes in an instant whilst Elena laughed at the whole scene.

"Rebekah is older, honey. She is allowed to use that word."

"Not fair."

"Well guess, what, pumpkin, life's not fair." Tyler added and I jokingly smacked him on the head.

"Ouch. What was that for?" He seemed surprised.

"Oh, nothing. Just needed to stretch my hand." I closed my face to his ear and whispered. "Please don't agitate your sister more than she already is. Come on, go and be a good boy for dad." Tyler seemed to understand and just left mumbling something I couldn't understand. Elena looked at me, her eyebrows lifted and shaking her head. I winked at her exhibiting my vampire costume.

"God…Rebekah…you look absolutely gorgeous." I turned around in an instant hearing Elena's words. My daughter was coming down the stairs and she was indeed gorgeous in her pink long dress; her hair was tied in a long thick braid coming down on one side of her body. She was a vision in her Rapunzel costume.

"Why does she get to wear the pretty costume?" Anna silently squeaked. I couldn't deal with her because I was amazed by my daughter's beauty.

"Honey, you look…" She seemed very nervous and happy that I was admiring her.

"…stunning." She all of a sudden hugged me tightly and replied.

"Thank you so much for letting me go." I held her tight in my arms loving the feeling.

"You're welcome." I whispered.

"And I'm sorry." She whispered back in my ear. "So sorry for everything..." My heart filled upon hearing her words and feeling my daughter hugging me even tighter. As I involuntarily glanced in Elena's direction I Saw her silently taking Anna out of the corridor in order to give me privacy with Rebekah. As she looked at me I could see only happiness in her eyes upon finally seeing me make truce with my daughter.

* * *

**ELENA's POV**

The masquerade ball was held on the top floor of the Beverly Hills hotel "Montage". Apart from how gorgeous the party venue was, the party itself had everything – the most famous celebrities, the fanciest food and booze and no paparazzi. In one single word: the perfect night ever.

We had all come in Damon's car and Bonnie was getting along really well with Stefan and Caroline who found her absolutely fascinating. I was incredibly happy about this evening. It had taken us two whole hours to get ready but Bonnie looked really cool in her witch costume and I must say I loved my vampire costume. Caroline had given us the wow factor by providing me with fake blood and Bonnie with a bag resembling a spell book. Our costumes were surreal: Damon's (a vampire costume that magically and strangely matched my own), Caroline's (portrayal of Jackie Kennedy) and Stefan's (who either wasn't wearing a costume or wanted to look like James Bond).

We blended in perfectly with the other guests as all of our costumes were elegant. The upbeat music and Halloween-like décor were entrancing and we were all having a blast just dancing around, mingling with the celebrities at the party. The only ones that were a bit on edge were of course me and Damon. He kept looking at me in a certain way and I kept avoiding his gaze like an idiot. I couldn't get Rebekah's words out of my head but for some reason I couldn't let Damon hope for a relationship that I wasn't sure would even happen. The more the evening progressed the more we both seemed to be feeling more miserable. The weird part is that the only people realizing our predicament were him and me…

**CAROLINE's POV**

I was with Elena in the bathroom taking a break to powder our noses. Seemed like we were the only ones in the entire party wanting to look our best. The other women were all dressed as scanks anyway…

"I've been meaning to ask you something…"

"Sure."

"Is everything ok between you and Damon?"

"Yeah…why are you asking?"

"You just both seem a bit on edge…"

"We kind of had a talk today."

"About what?"

"You probably heard about the Rebekah scene in the kitchen."

"I definitely did." I replied and put some more lipstick on.

"Well, you can imagine how it's been lately…"

"I do. So have you talked to Damon about the whole thing?"

"No, we haven;t…"

"Do you mind me asking why?" I was trying to hold my temper.

"There's no point, is there? Nothing's ever going to happen anyway. Might as well avoid a discussion that makes no sense. I wouldn't only make us both uncomfortable and…" I abruptly interrupted Elena as I felt my blood boiling in my veins.

"Ok…stop right there! It's been a long evening of you and Damon staring at each other so I'm just gonna be blunt. It doesn't matter what he does, Damon has gotten under your skin!" Elena's eyes widened

"That's not true." I pitied her helpless expression.

"God, just admit it Elena! You are attracted to him in all of his bad brother glory!" I burst.

"No…" She faintly replied.

"Wait. No you're not attracted to him or you just won't admit it?" I was too harsh with her but I was getting sick of this game they were playing.

"I can't, Caroline. If I admitted it, if I even thought it for just a second… what does that say about me?" She seemed really hurt. I gently replied:

"It says you're human, Elena…"

* * *

**DAMON's POV**

I was on the balcony looking at the stars. I had stolen a bottle of red wine and was drinking it alone. I wasn't in the mood to party tonight.

"Mmmm…bad vampire." I could recognize her voice anywhere. Sage… As I turned to look at her she dirtily smiled making the best of her sexy vampire costume. What was it with vampires at this Halloween party? Her words were as a result of me drinking a whole glass of red wine in one go. I shrugged and smiled back.

"I was thirsty. Now I'm not thirsty… My quality of form is simply subjective." I was distracted from Sage and ended up staring at Elena, at her beautiful pure face, wondering if she would ever be mine… Unfortunately for me, Sage saw who I was looking at.

"You know… A woman is not only for love – she's for pleasure." Sage seductively said batting her eyelashes so that I could see. I wasn't in the mood to play though…

"I am spoken for." I replied trying to make it sound like a joke. As I tried to go back inside she caught my hand and turned me around to face her.

"We are all spoken for in some way…" I knew exactly what she said. I remembered her words about how her beloved husband Finn had grown mad. How she had to put him in a mental institute just 2 years after they had gotten married. How she was still his wife ten years later but had no husband anymore…

"But what is being a vampire and not relishing in the pleasure of it?" Sage's face had gotten incredibly close to my own and I could see her hungrily stare at my lips. The hunger was written all over her face. If I didn't know better, I would have believed she was actually a blood-craving vampire. But what she was looking for in me was a completely different kind of craving.

"Sage…" I said taking a few steps back. But she quickly caught up with me.

"I want you Damon. Right here and right now…" I pitied her. Althought she intentionally tried to seem like a slut to the entire world I knew her better than others did. She was empty inside – empty because she had lost the love of her life.

"I want you just like before…Remember the nights we used to have?" Oh, I remembered them alright. We wouldn't talk too much, that was for sure.

"Come on, Sage. We're past that…" Before I could carry on she caught my lips quite aggressively. I felt her tongue meeting mine and after a split second I could feel myself getting drawn into her spell as the good old days. I could just let myself feel all of this, just like before…with no remorse this time. I felt Sage's hand caressing my chest and rapidly going down my stomach… I grabbed her hand before she could go further with this and pulled my face away from hers. Her expression seemed hurt and confused.

"I thought you wanted this."

"I used to want it."

"What the hell Damon? You promised it would be wherever…whenever we would meet."

"I know but…I've changed, Sage."

"You've changed? Because of that child over there?" She asked pointing back to the party. I knew she was talking about Elena.

"It's none of your business."

"Is it because she's so much younger than me, Damon?" I refused to answer her.

"Or because she reminds you of Katherine?" So she had noticed…

"Sage…"

"Or is it because she's so unreachable? So different from you that you know you can't really have her?" I wouldn't have admitted it to her but Sage had hit home base.

"You'll never last, Damon." Her voice wasn't full of venom anymore. She seemed sympathetic.

"She's too different from us. Just like Katherine was…"

"She's nothing like Katherine. She's pure, has a heart of gold, is a strong independent woman…" I said looking away. I had no idea why I was saying all of this to her. Maybe because we still had a connection even after everything that had happened between us.

"You bloody fool… you're head over heels with her, aren't you?"

"Maybe I am… would that be such a bad thing?"

"I hate you, Damon… You get to have it all, don't you?"

"What are you on about? I haven't had it all in a long while, Sage… Still don't have it."

"You have more than I do... Your wife died but at least she left you four children. My husband didn't leave me anything but money…"

"He left you a good life."

"Financially… but you know better than me that it's not the money that brings us happiness."

"It isn't."

"Forget what I said earlier…"

"Because you can't stand it if I'm happy?"

"Yeah, something like that…"

"Hey, are you ok?"

"You know why I became friends with you, Damon?"

"Because of my unbelievably good looks?"

"Dashing but no. I became friends with you because you were as miserable as I was."

"Well that's the best compliment I've ever gotten from you." She shook her head and carried on.

"You just made my problems go away because you always had yours to share with me."

"Ah, yes… the good times."

"Why did we ever fall out?"

"Because Katherine died… And the guilt for cheating on her with you crippled me."

"And then the doe-eyed nanny came along…" She maliciously replied.

"See, this is why we actually fell out. You never showed an ounce of support…"

"It's just that… I can see that you're in love with her. You can tell just by looking at your face. But I get the feeling that she either doesn't want to admit her feelings to herself or…"

"…She couldn't care less…" I replied interrupting her.

"I don't think it's that, you know…"

"Why do you say that?" Sage's expression suddenly transformed and a malicious grin appeared on her face.

"Oh, Damon… you should have seen your nanny's face when she saw me kiss you." She looked at me and I could read the satisfaction she felt about the whole thing on her expression. "It was priceless."

**ELENA's POV**

I felt like crying the moment I saw that slut kissing Damon. So instead of making a scene I turned to the nearest bartender and ordered a tequila shot. After just a few seconds I asked him for another shot and he looked at me rather weird but I couldn't care less. Just before I swallowed the thing I heard Klaus's playful voice.

"Looks like you're having fun, love." I turned to him wanting to wipe that smile off his face. But something made me stop.

"I was having fun before you came."

"Oh, do you really have to be this feisty with me, dear Elena?"

"I actually do."

"And why is that, love?"

"I only have a million reasons on my mind…"

"Ouch. I see you're in a bitter mood. Let me join you. Bartender, a shot for me as well!"

"What do you think you're doing?"

"Having a drink with you."

"I don't have drinks with guys that call me "love" for no good reason."

"I see. Would you prefer it if I called you beautiful? Because you most certainly are." I couldn't help but roll my eyes.

"To this wonderful night!" Klaus toasted and we both drank the tequila shot.

"Another round please." Klaus's eyebrows went up in surprise.

"Don't." I said pointing my finger at him.

"So what made you this upset Elena? You're usually never near alcohol."

"Who said I was upset?"I shouted feeling a bit tipsy already.

"Come on, love… you don't have to lie to me. You can trust me."

"Ummm… have you met you?"

"Well not like you have. Enlighten me, what is it that you hate about me?"

"You flirted the minute you met me…. You always call me love and dear Elena although you barely know me… And you think you can have any woman just because you're Klaus Michaleson." My voice sounded too snarky for my own taste.

"Nothing that cannot be fixed for you."

"So corny…"

"But it's true. I can be whatever you want tonight…"

"To a new improved Klaus!" I toasted and my third tequila shot went right down my throat.

"But tell me… is it my moron-of-a-friend that got you in this state?"

"Which friend?"

"Damon of course…" I fervently shook my head upon haering my boss's name.

"Fuck Damon." I heard myself saying and couldn't believe my ears.

"One minute I think he likes me, the next minute he goes on and kisses that redhead…" Klaus's expression changed in an instant.

"Sage… I wouldn't worry about her, love. They're just old friends."

"I don't care anymore… To hell with Damon!" I said and raised my glass again. The last thing I remembered was the taste of tequila going down my throat and burning it.

* * *

**STEFAN's POV**

She had left me alone – yet again. Caroline had gone off to talk to one of her friends and left me staring around the room for anyone I knew. I hated such kind of parties. You could recognize nobody because of all the stupid masks. Why had I let myself dragged at this party? I wish I knew. One thing was for sure – I wasn't attending the 2013 Halloween party, that was for sure. There was nobody around – Damon had disappeared seeming sulked because Elena wasn't giving him her full attention. My idiot brother…when would he learn?

I suddenly noticed Klaus on the dance floor. He was wasted again – well, nothing new there. Typical Klaus… What I hadn't expected was seeing a woman actually dancing with him. She seemed really happy in his arms. He was twisting and turning her and I could bet people around them were getting annoyed by her laughter. They really seemed to be having a blast.

Curiosity got the best of me and I found myself walking in their direction. The song suddenly changed and, if I wasn't mistaken, I believe it was the new hit "Feel so close" by Calvin Harris. I rolled my eyes as I realized the only reason I knew the song was because of Caroline. Klaus suddenly put his hands on the mystery woman's waist and pulled her close to him until their bodies were glued to each other. I didn't even know why I was drawn to this scene.

It was actually ridiculous how drunk they both were. The woman he was dancing with obviously had no self-respect as she was letting him touch her all over the place. Something didn't seem right. I took another look at the girl and I almost choked on my drink. That was… Elena.

**BONNIE's POV**

I was alarmed as I saw Damon run past me without saying anything. I went running after him as well but froze as I saw the scene unfolding in front of me. Elena, my sweet innocent friend, was dancing with Klaus, completely glued to him, just like a… whore. She was drunk, I could tell….but I don't think Damon was thinking of the same thing.

Because Damon, well let's just say Damon went straight to Klaus, pulled him away from her and punched him so hard that he hit the floor in an instant. He seemed to have lost it – the rage he had in his eyes made me extremely scared for Klaus if he even thought of getting up. But the douche seemed to remain on the floor, too confused by the sudden attack to even flinch.

Elena seemed completely confused as well but then, the moment she saw Damon she did something I would've never thought possible. She slapped him as hard as she could…

I cannot explain how shocked I felt by her behaviour. What the hell was wrong with her? But more importantly… what the hell was going on with Damon? He seemed to completely ignore the slap and instead violently took a very unstable Elena in his arms. He paused for a second to stare at her angry hurt face but then rapidly made his way through the crowd (some were staring, others weren't) and left the party in a much more excentric manner than he had entered it.

**DAMON's POV**

I must have been insane. What had I just done? The only thing I remember was seeing Klaus's filthy hands on Elena's thighs and then everything went red in front of my eyes. I could tell I punched him - just wasn't sure how badly and if he was going to be ok. I didn't care although a voice at the back of my mind was screaming that I would regret my actions later.

I took a very fragile and drunk Elena in the elevator after getting her out of that shithole. She tried to hit me in the head a few times but after that humiliating slap I didn't let her touch me again. She seemed half scared half entranced by my behaviour. The moment I reached the ground floor I gave my keys to a very shocked valet and waited for him to bring the car so I could get the hell out of there. After he returned with my car I told him to scram and made sure I tipped him enough so that he would leave us alone. The parking lot was empty as it was 2am so I was lucky. I tried to keep calm but I was getting worried about Elena. I looked at her and she looked back with a lost expression. I tried to make her stand so that I could assess how bad she was.

"Are you ok? Can you stand? Is anything hurt?"

Hearing Elena whimper whilst shaking her head made me both relieved and worried.

"You're going out fast… Elena, look at me" She almost slipped to the ground. "Look at me!" She barely opened her wet eyes. It hurt me knowing I had been the one to make her cry.

"Look at me…Focus. Look at me!" She was staring back into my eyes, no more anger, just hurt. I couldn't help but caress her beautiful soft hair. She opened her mouth and silently said.

"You kissed her…"

A few seconds passed as I didn't know how to reply. I hadn't really kissed Sage but I hadn't turned her down completely either. I could understand why she was suffering but I wish I could've been quick enough to tell her that Sage meant nothing to me; because the next second Elena simply fainted in my arms…

A few seconds later the whole disturbed gang came running down towards the car.

"Elena!" A very worried Bonnie screamed upon seeing her friend in my arms. I put her on the back seat in my car and Bonnie started attending to her.

"Oh my God." Caroline stated and for once I was happy she was too shocked to say anything else.

"What happened to her, Damon?" Stefan asked. He seemed on edge.

"She passed out. Probably because of how drunk she is…" I said - sympathy and pity obvious in my tone.

"And why is she drunk?!" Stefan spat back. I felt myself move towards him trying to repress my growing anger.

"What are you implying Stefan?" He seemed defiant.

"That you are the reason she is in this state…" Stefan spat whilst Bonnie and Caroline attended to Elena.

"What the hell are you talking about? I wasn't even with her. I was…"

"Out on the terrace with Sage of all women… I know, brother – I saw you. And I think Elena did as well…" I had no reply because I knew it was all true.

"See, this is why I told you to stay away from her, Damon. Because this is what you get whenever you mess with a girl's head."

"Stop it already. I can't take this anymore… Not now."

"The truth hurts doesn't it?" That stung.

"If you don't shut up I swear I'll make you shut up, brother."

"Can you stop fighting already?" Caroline screamed.

"Yes. We have other things to take care of." I said and got into the car ready to drive back home.

* * *

30 minutes later… (In Elena's bathroom)

**DAMON'S POV**

"Get out of the way, Bonnie!" I urgently asked taking hold of Elena's body.

"Damon, I can take care of her, really…"

"I'm responsible for this. I'll take care of her."

"What do you mean you're responsible for this? You got her drunk?!" She sounded shock - couldn't blame her.

"Indirectly…"

"I don't'understand…"

"I'll explain later." A pause came as we both saw Elena fighting to keep the alcohol and food in her stomach.

"Do you think she needs to go to the hospital?" Bonnie asked.

"Well, her asthma hasn't kicked in… She seems fine apart from her stomach which is fighting to get all of the alcohol out."

"I've never seen her in such a state…" Her voice was worried.

"This is nothing compared to three weeks ago."

"God…was she that bad?"

"You have no idea, Bonnie…" The look of pity in her eyes was unbearable. And then I realized what I could do for her.

"I know what might help her. A very concentrated lemonade and an anti-vomit pill from the kitchen. Do you mind…?"

"I'll go get her a pill from downstairs right away…"

"Yeah, thanks a lot Bonnie!"

"Wait…" She ran back seeming confused. "Where are the pills?"

"In the kitchen, in the drawer above the coffee machine… If they're not there, please go and wake up Jenna."

"Sure. I'll do that. Will be back asap." I looked at Bonnie leave and wondered how I would ever make things straight with her again. She must have thought I had the same damaging effect on Elena as Mason used to. That thought disappeared when I saw Elena go towards the toilet again. I rushed and just in time managed to get hold of her hair. She came back looking slightly yellowish.

"Stop treating me as if I can't handle myself. Trust me, I've been through worse." She said trying to push me away.

"Elena, you're drunk..." I didn't move an inch though.

"So?" She asked very surprised about my statement.

"Well, I can't leave you alone because you're throwing up as well..." She looked up at me and I could tell that she was upset. Her voice was hoarse but firm.

"I can take care of myself... I don't need..." She was suddenly interrupted by another wave of sickness and she went straight to the toilet again, not letting me hold her air up anymore.

"Damon..." She muttered and I could hear her tears.

"Who am I?" She was really sobbing now and I didn't know what to do but take her in my arms and gently rock her while holding her body tightly against my chest.

"Shhh..." I whispered in her ear trying to calm her down.

"I don't recognise myself..." She couldn't carry on because tears came again.

"That's it, let it all out." I whispered in her ear, gently caressing her smooth hair.

"I don't want you to see me like this... I'm pathetic." Hearing her words I grabbed her chin and forced her to look me in the eye.

"Don't you ever say that... You are anything but pathetic." She was stunned by my action but actually listened to me.

"I am so drunk... I embarrassed you in front of all your friends..." She said in a serious tone.

"Don't worry. Those people are not my friends."

"Regardless... Can you ever forgive me Damon?"

"Can you ever forgive me for kissing Sage?" Her eyes lit with jealousy at hearing Sage's name. Oh no... But then something inside her softened and she simply nodded.

"Then you're forgiven as well." She smiled at hearing my words. A few minutes later I was carrying her to her bed where Bonnie gave her a pill and we both put her to sleep. Even in that messed up state, Elena was still gorgeous. She fell asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow and she silently snored a little which I found so endearing.

Outside on the corridor I was left with Bonnie whom I escorted to her bedroom.

"You're both a couple of idiots." She said to my face without any reserve. I didn't even know what to reply.

"It's such a pity that you can't get over yourself and tell her that you love her." Bonnie was certainly a very direct person – just like Elena.

"She doesn't want me, Bonnie. What good would that do to her or me?"She slowly shook her head pulling out the best-friend card.

"Well you can see what good the current situation is doing to her." She was god-damn right. And then she carried on.

"Look, I just want what's best for her. She hasn't had an easy life. She's had only disappointments so far. So no matter what you do, please don't hurt her, Damon."

"I would never hurt her." I firmly stated.

"That remains to be seen." No wonder she lacked confidence in me. I wouldn't trust me either.

"You hate me, don't you?" She briefly studied my expression and the answered.

"I don't hate you. But until you do the right thing with Elena, I'm not going to love you either." She said and opened the guest bedroom door.

"Bonnie."

"Yes?" She asked turning around.

"Do you think I stand a chance with her?"

"If you love her enough, yes... You do, Damon Salvatore."

The next day...

**BONNIE's POV**

"Elena, I am your friend and I support you no matter what but I gotta tell you... You screwed up last night."

"I agree..."

"No. You didn't just screw up, you screwed up big time. This man – Damon – I don't know his character or anything but... it is so clear that he is in love with you Elena." I Didn't care how much she hated to hear this, I was her friend and a friend is supossed to help you out.

"You can't know that..." She said still clearly shaken by the hangover.

"Oh I know Elena. Believe it or not, I can see true love when I see it. And Damon loves you."

"Please..." She asked - to hell with it! She needed someone to knock some sense into her.

"And last night you made a complete fool of yourself. In front of everybody at that party."

"You think I don't know that Bonnie?" She asked and I heard anger in her voice.

"Well I can definitely say that you're making a fool of yourself now as well... Acting so innocent as if it was all Damon's fault." Her face was beyond shocked.

"How did you...?"

"Damon told me all about Sage." He had told me this morning after probably realising that I was indeed on his side.

"Great... What else did he tell you about?"

"He told me about Mason..."

"No.. He had no right to do that." She shouted.

"Well believe it or not he's been a better friend to me than you have been lately Elena."

"That is not fair..."

"It's completely fair. How could you hide it from me? Especially about Mason! And everything that happened afterwards... I thought we were best friends Elena." I had hit a nerve.

"We are best friends..."

"I'm not so sure anymore." And I wasn't even joking.

"You wanna talk about guilt and fault, Bonnie?" She shouted.

"I can't do this now Elena."

"Why didn't you tell me about George?"

"Tell you what?" I asked completely clueless of what was about to come.

"That he asked you to marry him..." Elena said weeping. Air got stuck in my throat. I felt I couldn't even breathe because of the shock.

"And that you said yes..."

"How did you..."

"Find out? George called me asking if you were enjoying L.A. You can imagine what a shock it was to hear about your engagement from someone else but you..." Oh my God...

"Elena..."

"Or how much it hurt..."

"I didn't do it to hurt you. Damon called me and told me about how bad you were. And George had just asked me to marry him. Knowing in what state you were I couldn't bring myself to tell you. I didn't want to make you feel like I had everything and you didn't..."

"You think I would've been jealous? I would have been bloody happy for you..."

"I didn't want to risk it... I was going to tell you."

"You think I'm acting like a moron? About Damon and all? Well guess what. I lost everyone that I cared about in my life – my mum left me; my dad and brother died... and Matt and Mason just ran away never looking back. Excuse me for being reluctant to fall in love again – especially with a bloody movie star." She said and turned around to hide her anger and tears. I felt like an idiot.

"I think you deserve to be with someone like Damon."

"Well you certainly seem to know what I want better than I do." She said in a sarcastic voice.

"I know that he makes you happy. And excited... and lucky to get out of bed in the morning..."

"It's all an illusion. You saw me last night. I don't belong in his world..." She replied massaging her probably aching temples.

"All I know is that... He's good for you, Elena... You just don't see it."

"I don't know about that."

"Well it will be your decision in the end. Just be careful... True love only comes once in life. It would be a shame to have it in front of your eyes and not acknowledge it." After a long pause came her response.

"Bonnie?"

"Mmm?"

"I'm so happy for you and George..." That was my real friend, her sweet kind personality surfacing. I missed her so much, especially the kind of hug that we were sharing right now, and I had enjoyed the few days I got with her. But I also knew that it was time for me to go.

**ELENA's POV**

I woke up to see the sun up in the sky. What had I done? It took me a few seconds to realize that I had fallen asleep after talking to Bonnie. Means I must have been more tired than I thought. As I got up from bed I noticed a piece of paper on the night stand. Upon examining it I noticed Bonnie's handwriting. It said:

**"_Dear Elena,_**

**_Please don't hate me for what I have just done. _**

**_The moment you will be reading this I will have already arrived at the airport in L.A. I needed to go, Elena. We both know that it's for the best. At least this time..._**

**_I'm not mad at you – you know I love you, my dear friend. But I think you have enough to deal with right now in L.A. without having to worry about me. _**

**_If you ever want to talk about anything just pick up the phone – I will always be on the other end of the line. But unfortunately we now live different lives._**

**_I wouldn't be leaving if I wasn't completely sure that you were well taken care of. But you have Damon for that. Whether you like to admit it or not, he seems trustworthy – someone who genuinely cares about you... Don't give him a hard time for telling me about Mason – he just wants what's best for you. _**

**_Take care of yourself Elena. And promise me one thing – that you'll make yourself happy. No matter what it takes..._**

**_Yours forever,_**

**_Bonnie"_**

* * *

**DAMON's POV**

In the evening, after Bonnie was long gone, I went to Elena's room to check on her. I wasn't sure what state I would find her in. I simply went in cause I thought she might have been sleeping but then I saw her on the balcony. As I approached her I realized she was staring at the sun setting right into the ocean, her look empty.

"I feel like a horrible person..." She said sensing my presence.

"Come on...Give yourself some slack. You got drunk because of me last night."

"I'm not talking about that... I just... can't believe I drove Bonnie away. The only person that has remained my friend, I drove away..." I hated this feeling - aching whenever she did.

"You didn't drive her away, Elena... She personally told me that."

"Of course she did... Lately she's been talking to you more than to me." She felt betrayed as well.

"Hey... She loves you more than anything."

"We're kind of each other's family... Since we have none of our own. " She replie smiling.

"Well there you go... She would never run away because of you, Elena..."

"I feel like I really screwed up this time."

"Trust me, you didn't. She's so lucky to have you as her best friend." She finally turned around to face me.

"Thank you."

"No problem..." I said and smiled.

"Not just for this, Damon... For everything..."There was something in her eyes that made my skin fill with goose bumps. Could it be... love? "I don't know what I would do if you weren't here. You've become my best friend." Oh God...

"Don't do this, Elena..." I silently replied.

"Do what?" She asked confused.

"Don't turn our relationship into friendship. Please..."

"Damon..."

"It just... you saying that makes me feel like an idiot."

"I don't understand. Why?" I sighed realising that all of my dreams had been crushed all over again.

"I'm a complete idiot because I thought for one second that I wouldn't have to feel guilty anymore."

"Wait, what are you talking about? Guilty for what?"

"For wanting what I want..." I said and deeply stared into her eyes. In turn her expression changed in an instant. I could see the reluctance plastered on her face. Shit...

"Damon..." She said and her eyes went from my eyes to my lips and back. She was fighting it. I could tell. I've gotten to know Elena quite well and I understood why she was against us. She probably couldn't trust any man after everything she'd been through. I wasn't taking it personally...

"I know. Believe me... I get it." I said and took a few steps to leave the balcony.

But then something clicked in my mind. I loved this girl. I really did. And she seemed to have some sort of feelings for me. I knew for sure because of that kiss we had shared months ago. And because of her jealous outburst that led to the drunken fiasco last night. And especially because of Bonnie's words. To hell with Stefan's advice and warning – How could I possibly hurt her anymore? I couldn't be selfish with her. But if I never did this again then she wouldn't know how I felt about her. I'm sure she realized my feelings – especially because of Rebekah's words. So there was no sense telling her that. Instead I felt the urge to show her what I really felt.

"No. You know what?" I said turning around. "If I'm gonna feel guilty about something, I'm gonna feel guilty about this."

And then I gently grabbed her neck with both my hands and kissed her sweet soft lips. I couldn't feel her resisting in any way. Her whole body seemed to go limb and she simply sank into the kiss, letting herself finally feel this wonderful feeling coursing through my veins. A few seconds later she grabbed my left hand but not to push me away but to quietly show her approval. The moment I let go of her lips her eyes opened and she seemed completely stunned, examining my face. She was the most beautiful woman I had ever laid eyes on. And I didn't regret my feelings for her no matter what would happen. I gently let go of her neck and just said.

"Good night."

I felt the need to walk away and give her some privacy - in order to deal with her feelings. I was definitely going to hell for my actions. But for once, at least I was the happiest man on Earth.

* * *

**_So what did you guys think? Please review and let me know what you liked/ didn't like, what you want from the storyin the future :) Your opinions are very important to me. Till next time!  
_**


	18. Chapter 18 Halo

**_Author's note: I am so happy to be able to post another chapter for you, my dear readers. Thank you so much for your encouraging reviews for my last chapter! I do hope you enjoy this one. I was so happy to finally hear Elena tell Damon that she loved him. But do hate the sire bond, messing up with Damon's head. Anyways, hopefully it will work out for Damon and Elena's sake in the show. I do hope you can bear with my mistakes, if there are any as I am not patient enough to check the document three times as I usually do. Chapter 18 is called Halo after Beyonce's beautiful song. I hope you enjoy it!_**

* * *

**CHAPTER 18 - HALO**

* * *

**16th November 2012**

**Damon's POV**

I slowly walked up the stairs to Alaric's apartment. My best friend lived on the last floor of a fancy block of flats in downtown L.A. – with a view that I would have killed for. A typical bachelor pad… Of course, that was what he always said whenever he came down to my house as well. Every step I took felt heavy and full of worry; I dreaded meeting Alaric. Not because we were off, but because of what I was about to confess. See, my friend Alaric was one of the best psychotherapists in L.A. . Most Beverly Hills celebrities would make use of his services; he had a very successful career winning numerous awards and travelling quite a bit – which is exactly what took its toll on his marriage in the end. I briefly knocked on the door and before I knew it my tall, broad-shouldered friend let me in holding his arms wide apart to give him a brief hug.

"Hey there, stranger." He seemed happy today. "Long time no see."

"Yeah, it's been a long time, hasn't it?" I was happy to see him as well. It had been quite a while since the last time we had a good old chat. More exactly, right before Elena moved in. Which was the same time when Alaric was going through a painful divorce with his wife Isobel… He had been a wreck ever since. But seeing him in such a good shape made me feel really glad for him. He deserved it.

"So, Damon, come on, let's have something to drink." He cheerfully replied leading me to the balcony of his penthouse.

"Oh you know I don't drink before midday Ric." He looked at me in a very funny manner, his eyes betraying the doubt regarding my words.

"Good one." He replied almost giggling and made his way to the bar. I checked my watch. Yup… 11:45 in the morning. There were about 25 degrees today, quite warm for this time of the year. Perfect day to enjoy a drink outside on the balcony.

"So, will the usual suffice?" Alaric asked, already preparing the Manhattan I always enjoyed having with him. His question pulled me out of my midday-dreaming.

"Oh, believe me, Ric… not even a hundred of those will suffice today." My serious tone actually startled Ric who turned around fixating me.

"Something's wrong." It wasn't a question.

"It's about Elena…" I unwillingly replied.

"I see." Ric had met Elena already at the 1920's themed party I had hosted. The same night with the entire Mason fiasco... He had been the one who drove me and Elena to the hospital. He was the only friend I could truly trust.

"So what happened Damon?" Ric asked giving me my Manhattan and sitting across the table with his dry Martini. I couldn't even touch my drink. I sat in silence for a minute before I started.

"Nothing happened." I finally managed to reply.

"I don't understand."

"I don't blame you…" A flicker of realization appeared in his eyes and all of his years of psychotherapy quickly helped him unlock the mystery.

"Has she been **avoiding** you?" I felt my fists involuntarily grab hold of the chair handles.

"Not really. But there's something about the way she's acting… I can't put my finger on it."

"Has she responded **in any way** to your intentions?" I felt like I was examined by a shrink. But I couldn't care less. Alaric was my best friend…

"Can we start with something easier?" I jokingly asked.

"Damon…" Ric replied in a serious tone.

"The only thing I can tell you is that she hasn't turned me down in any way."

"What do you mean by that?" I was definitely confusing him.

"I kissed her. Twice…"

"Oh…" Ric replied seeming completely unaware of this. He was the first person I ever shared these events with. He was the one I trusted the most.

"Yeah, I know… And she didn't turn me down; not the first time or the second time."

"Well that's not really avoiding you, is it?" His reaction was understandable. He didn't know everything happening between Elena and me. I didn't have time or patience to tell him everything either. I eventually replied:

"I know. She also made a jealous scene at the Halloween party."

"Oh I heard about that…" He replied seeming sorry for me. I was confused.

"Wait, what? How did you even hear about it?!"

"It was out in all the newspapers, Damon." I rolled my eyes realizing what a big idiot I had been.

"Undercover paparazzi…" I replied.

"More like undercover piranha." Ric replied taking a big sip of his drink.

"I promised Elena there would be no paparazzi at that party…" Guilt – that was the feeling eating my insides right now. I had let her down…

"You couldn't have known that Damon. Plus, they left her alone didn't they?" I started laughing.

"I would think so. I can't imagine what kind of idiot would pick on her again after how beaten up the other jackasses were." I just couldn't stop admiring Elena for the way she had handled those animals back in August. She had protected my daughter and given them a lesson.

"I saw that too." Ric replied and a big grin appeared on his face. "She's quite a character, Damon..." He jokingly replied and I knew he was referring to the slap she had given me at the party.

"She's perfect." Was all I could reply. Ric stared at my face probably pitying me.

"You know, Damon, if it makes you feel any better, after reading about the party and having met her… I think she cares about you." I briefly looked at him then gazed away in the distance.

"What good does it make that she cares?" I shook my head in defeat. "No matter how many times I kiss her or how jealous she gets, she never reciprocates my feelings."

"Maybe you should let her come to you…"

"And how am I supposed to do that?!" I was a bit frustrated.

"Just stop trying to make her yours." He knew so well, old Ric… "Believe me, she will come to you. Especially since I believe that she cares about you."

"How can you be so sure?"

"Because, my friend, no matter how much a woman is attracted to you, she wouldn't put up with all of your crap if she didn't love you." That insult actually put a silly smile on my face.

"I'm in love with a woman I can never have…" I replied and drank my Manhattan in one go. This feeling was something totally new to me…

"Give it time, Damon…" Ric gently replied.

"Yeah… that's what I'm gonna do."

"You didn't come up to see me just for this, did you?" He asked me, once again knowing my every secret.

"How the hell do you know?"

"Years of knowing you Damon..."

"I fucked up, Ric." This actually made my friend put his drink down and gaze into my eyes, confused.

"What?"

"I fucked up. Big time…" I hesitated then I decided to tell at least one other soul the horrific secret I had been keeping for years… The story never took more than 3 minutes, yet when I finished telling it I felt ten times worse than before. And also ashamed in front of my friend. Ric was speechless.

"Damon…how could you?" He asked, incapable of believing the whole thing.

"I don't know, Ric. I never meant to."

"Does Stefan know…?"

"No. And with a bit of luck he will never find out."

"I don't get it though. Why are you thinking about this all of a sudden? This happened years ago."

"The god-damn problem is that Klaus knows all about this. And after that punch I gave him at the party, I feel like he's going to want to get back at me somehow."

"Come on, Damon. He's been your friend for years. You actually think he would get so mad about a punch?"

"We're more buddies than friends. And, if I know Klaus, the thing he hates most in the world is to be humiliated. And that's exactly what I did."

"Regardless, I don't think he would actually reveal such a secret."

"I'm afraid I have to disagree with you on that one, Ric. I think he's capable of anything right now."

"What are you gonna do, Damon?"

"I have no fuckin' idea…"

* * *

**24th November 2012**

**DAMON's POV**

I briefly glanced towards the clock on my nightstand – 07:57 am. I silently growled upon thinking about the following minutes until the alarm would go off. I turned around and tightly closed my eyes, wishing that for once I could just sleep properly. Even if it was for only three minutes… Looking back on the past year, I realized that I hadn't had a decent night's rest since the day Katherine had died. Not that I could blame her for my sleepless nights… My conscience was the only thing that was keeping me up every night, reminding me of all my sins and all of the injustice I had done to my wife.

I momentarily looked towards the vanity table placed in the corner of my bedroom. A beautiful, simple, white piece of furniture that had discrete golden patterns on it... Katherine had chosen it. And just like that, I started remembering…

**_May 2004_**

_**DAMON's POV** _

_I looked at my beautiful wife who was sitting on the chair at her beloved vanity and putting some make-up on. Although we were late for the party, I couldn't help but stop and admire her. I loved every bit of her like crazy – her long curly blonde hair, her emerald-green eyes and her petite fragile body. Even more so now that she was pregnant with our second child... We had had numerous conversations when she insisted that she had become completely unattractive to me, since she had gained so much weight. As I looked at her, I couldn't help but think how wrong Kathy was. She was a vision in her short black dress. It was like she had heard me as she turned her head around and raised her eyebrows in surprise._

"_How long have you been standing there?" She happily asked. _

"_No more than two minutes or so…" Hearing that she completely turned around, and I could see a bump in her dress. At only four months, Kathy was finding it hard to keep the pregnancy on a low note anymore._

"_We're going to be late…" She trailed off._

"_I know." I cheekily replied, not being able to take my eyes off her._

"_You're not even dressed properly, Damon!" She replied, seeming a bit annoyed. To that, I simply wiggled my eyebrows trying to make her relax. She would always get stressed because of such things. But especially now, during the pregnancy I took extra care that she wouldn't worry too much about insignificant things. It worked and she grinned so beautifully at me that I thought my heart was going to explode with happiness. I slowly made my way to the vanity, took Kathy in my arms and sat on the chair holding her in my arms._

"_You're crazy, Damon Salvatore, do you know that?" She replied but quickly melted in my arms, loving the closeness._

"_Not as crazy as you, Katherine Salvatore." I whispered in her ear making her tremble. _

"_I bet you're going to be ashamed with me at the party tonight." I suddenly turned her head so that she could meet my eyes._

"_What are you talking about?" I asked, being confused._

"_I am as big as a…" My reaction was to gently grab her lips and make her stop talking. _

"_No, you're not. You're gorgeous. I should make you look in the mirror until you actually realize just how beautiful you really are." Her green eyes changed and I could see the love she had for me. _

"_You are the kindest, most loving and patient husband that a woman could wish for…" Her reply touched my heart. _

"_No… You are the best wife a man could wish for…" Her expression suddenly changed from happiness to fear. _

"_Promise me one thing, Damon." She asked of me, seeming very serious._

"_Anything…" I replied in a heartbeat._

"_Promise me you'll never cheat on me, no matter what happens. Please…" She seemed so scared just saying those words out loud. I realized that she meant them so I gently caressed her cheeks, wiping off the few tears that had appeared on her face, and hopefully her fears as well._

"_Listen to me carefully, Kathy. I will never cheat on you. I promise…" She seemed to light up a bit after hearing my words. _

"_Why would I ever do that? You are the most beautiful, sweet woman I have ever met. I love you and I could never hurt you like that." By the look on her face, my wife knew that I was telling the truth. _

__**Present day...  
**

In earnest, back then I thought that I was telling the truth as well. But little did I now in that moment that I would later on be betraying the love that my precious wife had for me. I still remember Katherine's eyes the moment I promised her that I would be faithful. I couldn't help but ask myself in what moment had I given up on her. But it was all so clear. Because the night I was unfaithful to my wife for the first time was the night that I betrayed another person I truly cared about. And for that, I could never forgive myself, no matter how everything would turn out in the end.

The alarm suddenly went off and I ruthlessly slammed my hand against the stop button putting an end to the misery that my ears had to endure. I unwillingly got out of bed, walked around the room and found myself near Katherine's vanity. As I caressed the cold lifeless piece of furniture I realized that the day had just begun. And given how it had started, I feared that it wouldn't go as well as I had hoped. And knowing my luck, it would be a complete and utter disaster.

* * *

**Five hours later...**

**ELENA's POV**

I was stuck in front of my wardrobe not knowing which dress to pick. I had been standing in front of my wardrobe for five minutes, wrapped up in a towel and was beginning to shiver because of how cold my skin had become.

_Come on, Elena_. I muttered to myself_. It's_ _not like you are dressing up to be fashionable on this occasion._

I took my long tight black dress out of the wardrobe and checked my reflection in the mirror, picturing how I would look walking inside the church wearing this. I turned the dress around and realized it was missing a big piece of fabric – the one that was supposed to cover my entire back. I angrily threw it on the floor and loudly growled not knowing what to choose. I looked at my reflection in the mirror again.

_So, Elena, what dress would be more appropriate for a memorial? A black one of course… Ok… so, which one of these is more appropriate for your boss's wife's memorial? _

I took two other black dresses out of the wardrobe and blankly stared at them, gasping for air. The first one had long sleeves and covered my chest and back completely; but, oh, yes, it was incredibly short. Too short for a memorial. Unless I wanted the entire church to turn around and stare at me. The second one ended right above my knees, but had no long sleeves, was a bit cut-out around my shoulders and had a v-neck.

_So, which one will it be? Damn it, how the hell am I even supposed to know which one is more appropriate for my boss's wife's memorial? My boss- the one who is in love with me, and for whom I have feelings of some sort. God, this is going to take hours…_

I glanced at the clock and panicked – I had only 50 minutes until we were all supposed to get in the car and leave for the church. And it wasn't just me who had to get ready. I was supposed to help Damon dress the kids up as well. I was already getting frustrated about the dresses. I thought it through quickly and just chose the v-necked dress. No dress was appropriate enough but I had to go with the best out of three bad choices.

I dropped my towel on the floor and ran to the drawer to get lingerie on. Just then, I heard a knock on the door.

"Elena! Can I come in?" Damon's voice sent me into such a big panic mode that I couldn't even reply. This was ridiculous. What was going on with me? Ok, so he was on the other side of the door while I was naked. Big deal… But it actually was a big deal to me; because just a few words of his sent butterflies right in my stomach making me crave the days when I didn't even know he existed. His effect on me was becoming ridiculous.

"Elena?!" Damon asked after my reply never came. He sounded worried. I bit my lip and replied.

"Can it wait, Damon?" I shouted desperately looking for my bathrobe.

"Not really..." His voice sounded reluctant. "I just need to tell you something. It will only take two minutes." I snatched the bathrobe from my drawer, violently putting it on and tying the straps against my waist in order to make sure I was decent.

"Just a second." I replied throwing my lingerie back into the drawer and making sure there was nothing that would create an even more embarrassing moment between us.

"Come in!" I shouted and the door slowly opened revealing a very disturbed-looking Damon. I didn't even notice what was wrong with him as I had my own problems to deal with. But when he looked into my eyes I felt waves of electricity being exchanged between us.

"Look, I just…" He suddenly paused, the look of realization appearing on his face. He seemed embarrassed for some reason and turned his head, staring at the balcony. I was confused to say the least.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have bothered you." He said, avoiding my gaze.

"It's alright. What did you want to talk to me about?" He seemed to get some courage and replied.

"I wanted to warn you about something, Elena." He seriously replied. I was silent.

"There aren't many people coming to the church today… However, many of the guests knew Katherine very well. And I don't want you feeling bad if they stare or gossip about you."

"I don't understand…" I weakly replied. "Why would they stare and gossip?"

"Firstly, because you resemble a younger version of Katherine… Not everybody notices, but her family might…" He said and finally looked me in the eye.

"And secondly, because there have been rumours lately…"

"What kind of rumours?" I asked, not liking the sound of that.

"Rumours regarding me and you." I froze upon hearing his words. My mind went blank and I couldn't help but think the worst. Seeing my face, Damon continued explaining.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you earlier, but I did that because I didn't want to worry you in any way. Since the Halloween party, there have been many so-called journalists writing about us in the press." My head was spinning.

"In newspapers?" I asked and Damon briefly nodded.

"Newspapers, magazines, on the Internet, even on TV." He replied and I could tell he was frustrated with the whole thing.

"And what exactly are they saying about us?" I got enough courage just to ask that one thing.

"That we're together." This time, Damon didn't look at me. I don't know if he did on purpose or if he was just too ashamed about hiding this from me. By the way he said together I figured what the headlines were… I could just picture the stories they had made up, trying to get an extra buck for their sleazy magazines.

"Elena?" He asked, pulling me out of my day-dream.

"I'm sorry. I never thought there were paparazzi at the party." I felt a distinct taste of bile in my mouth at the thought of how drunk I had been and what a spectacle I had offered everyone at that party. I felt sick.

"That's alright." I managed to reply. I felt the need to sit down on my bed as my head was spinning because of all the new information Damon had told me in the past two minutes. Just as I thought I was going to faint, I felt a warm hand cupping my own. I looked up and Damon's sweet compassionate face was looking down at me.

"You don't have to go if you don't want to." He meant the memorial.

"I can't stay. I promised Rebekah I would go…" Damon would be busy taking care of the guests. Plus, Jenna wasn't home this weekend; her brother had ended up in the emergency room after falling down some stairs, and she obviously went to visit him. Elijah wasn't home either because he had offered to drive Jenna up to Seattle. So there was nobody to take care of the kids at the memorial. I just had to go.

"I'll cope without you." He replied seeming to read my mind.

"She won't understand if I don't go. I owe it to her to go, Damon." I firmly replied. Damon's blue eyes softened upon hearing my words and he let go of my hand. Just when I thought he was going to leave, he did something I wasn't expecting. He kneeled down, grabbed both my hands in his and briefly kissed them both. I couldn't even breath, let alone react to his gesture. The bit of skin he had brushed his lips on was hot as fire and his blue eyes staring into mine made my entire body catch fire. He seemed to be admiring me and I felt my cheeks flushing with warmth. God, his eyes were messing with my head so badly. He didn't seem to notice though; he seemed worried and upset but most of all, he was tortured by something I couldn't understand. After a long pause he gently replied.

"Thank you for loving her so much…" And with that, Damon let go of my hands, stood up, and left my room in silence. As I got off the bed, I didn't even know how I felt. In the end, I realized it was a combination of bitter-sweet feelings. In the end, the bitter feelings won over the sweet ones.

* * *

**A couple of hours later….**

**REBEKAH's POV**

It had been one year since mother's death.

And I still couldn't get over the fact that she wasn't here with us anymore. It was the strangest feeling – setting foot in the same church we had brought her body 365 days before. I don't really remember that day anymore – it all seemed like a blur of moments and so many people that I didn't even know. Everybody saying how sorry they were for our loss… My grandma holding a speech in front of everybody and then disgracefully blaming my dad for mum's death… My father losing his mind after the ceremony and getting drunk inside his office back home…

One way or the other, I felt that today was the same. Far less people actually came to this one-year memorial but the atmosphere was identical to last year. Apart from the fact that nobody was crying anymore. Because one way or the other, we had made it through without mum in our lives. New events and people had come into our home and made it better. And by people I meant Elena. Where should I start? She changed our lives, that's for sure. She hadn't replaced mom, but in a strange way, she had replaced the love and comfort we longed for after losing her. And, most of all, she was there for us; despite the fact that we loved her or hated her. She didn't give up on us– especially not on me, the one person that made her life a living hell in our home.

At the end of the day, Elena had stuck around and cared for me more than my own mother had. And, despite the fact that nothing could express how much hurt this realization brought me, I was grateful to have her in my life. Especially now, when she was holding my hand as we were sitting on the bench right behind dad… Squeezing it whenever someone would come up and say meaningless sorry's and words that hurt more than helped. She knew what it was like going through all of this, which is why she had kept her promise to me and came to the memorial. She was here for me once again and I couldn't help but think that I really cared about her. And for the first time in six months, I think Elena felt that the love she had for me was finally reciprocated.

**ELENA's POV**

The acidic taste of bile flooded my mouth again. I had managed to keep it away for the first hour spent in the church – a whole hour of greeting people whom I didn't know and people whom I didn't want to know. It was, at the end of the day, part of my job. But right now, as I was slowly walking to the main entrance, I wish I weren't here. Not because churches made me sick since my father and brother's funeral. And not even because I was a complete stranger, yet everyone was talking about me. I had expected people to talk about me. Truth be told, I presume that I was the new addition to the Salvatore family.

What bothered me weren't the people, but their words, and most importantly their stares. Especially the ones coming from Katherine's side of the family… I could tell her mother loathed me just by the one look and few words she was obliged to give me. She looked like a very proud woman despite the fact that she didn't seem to be rich or arrogant. But she made it clear by her gestures that she disliked Damon, and even clearer that she hated me. The worst part was that by the time most of the guests had arrived Katherine's entire group of relatives and friends were whispering and throwing me both jealous and dirty stares as if I were a complete and utter whore.

Ok, so you are probably wondering how I am so sure what they were talking about me. Well, the gossip really kicked off the moment Klaus Michaleson, bearing an arrogant thick-skinned grin, entered the church and threw me a look as if I was his mistress. Damon only made matters worse by blankly staring at him, looking as if he was going to murder that jackass right there in front of everybody. I didn't understand what was going on between those two but the only thing I knew was that Damon's actions were making everything worse. Luckily, Damon was a true gentleman and did not end up making a scene at his wife's memorial. Althought Klaus fully deserved it. The last thing I wanted to do was bear all of this crap but I had promised Rebekah I would stay. Good thing the children hadn't noticed anything. Stefan and Caroline on the other hand, had noticed and were trying really hard to keep Damon calm. I for one was fighting the strong urge to just run out of the church as fast as I could.

There were about five minutes left before the whole event was going to begin. I was just getting myself together, when all of a sudden I felt my upper lip wet. I touched my face and the second I saw my fingers covered in blood I quickly excused myself, gave John to Caroline and Stefan and made my way out of the church as decently as I could. With loads of glares pointed towards me of course. I don't know what I felt outside in the sunny weather. Relief to get out of that snake pit… mixed with growing panic that my nose was still bleeding… I suddenly heard the main door closing with a thud and I was shocked to see Damon urgently following me, looking at me with a poker face.

"What are you doing?!" I asked in disbelief. Was he mad?

"You didn't think I was going to let you bleed, did you?" He asked putting one arm around my shoulder and leading me to the fountain in the garden of the church.

"You shouldn't have left. It's inappropriate." I managed to reply although blood kept coming out of my nose. I wasn't panicking about the blood, not yet at least. Damon, on the other hand, seemed filled with worry.

"Inappropriate you say?" He asked and I could hear how tense his tone was. "I'll tell you what's inappropriate Elena." He replied gently making me sit on the edge of the fountain, underneath a tree that was providing a bit of shade.

"It's inappropriate to gossip in a church. And make people feel uncomfortable. And show up at a memorial with a big grin plastered on your face. That's what's inappropriate." He angrily said taking a white handkerchief out of his pocket and covering my nose with it.

"Tilt your head down and let me hold it tightly." I obeyed him although I didn't agree with him being out here with me instead of with his children in the church. His voice became more gentle.

"Breathe through your mouth. Regular relaxed breaths." He instructed holding my waist with one hand and my nose with the other. I did exactly what he said, trying to calm down.

"What's happening to me?" I asked him, not understanding why my nose was all of a sudden bleeding. He paused for a second, probably thinking of a reply.

"Has this ever happened before?" He asked.

"Not that I remember of." I managed to reply.

"I'm sure it's nothing then." He gently replied caressing my hair. "Stress, most likely." I couldn't reply but I understood what he meant. There's only so much a woman can take. A minute or so passed as we sat in silence. At a certain point I felt no more blood falling. I gently grabbed Damon's hand and pulled it away from my nose. His handkerchief was covered in blood – now that was a stain that would surely never come off.

I slowly turned around to Damon who was filled with worries. The colour of his eyes shocked me. They were so grey today… Without saying anything, he pulled out another handkerchief out of his pocket and gently wiped off every bit of blood I had on my face – starting with my nose, cheeks, chin and ending with my lips. We made eye contact over and over again in the 30 seconds it took him to wipe my face clear of blood.

"It's my fault everybody made you feel so bad today. I shouldn't have come…" I said.

"Hey, don't you think like that." He replied grabbing hold of my cheek.

"You have no reason to be ashamed or uncomfortable, do you hear me?" He spoke with such passion that I couldn't help but nod, feeling mesmerized by his divine eyes. I don't know how it happened but we ended up glancing at each other's lips, and I could tell just how much I wanted to kiss him. He seemed to realize what I was thinking and just before any of us could say a word, the moment ended upon hearing the loud church bells.

As I snapped out of Damon's alluring stare, I was mortified with myself. I quickly sat up, thanked Damon and almost ran to the entrance of the church, silently making my way back to the seat next to Rebekah. I couldn't help but think - What was wrong with me? For God's sake, I was at Katherine's one-year memorial and the only thing I could think of was kissing Damon. For the second time in my life, after having an abortion, I felt like I was going to rot in hell.

* * *

**DAMON's POV**

"Thank you all for coming today." I reluctantly said, my voice reverberating in the entire church as I was talking right in front of the microphone. My words caught everybody's attention. I hadn't prepared a speech although I knew I should have. However, I wanted to say these few words; I owed them to her; especially because I hadn't been capable of saying anything at her funeral. I braced myself, and tried to talk directly from my heart.

"We are all gathered here to commemorate my beloved wife, the mother of my children – Katherine Pierce." I said and looked at the giant picture of my wife that was placed on an easel for everybody to see.

"One year has passed since her tragic death… And not one day in that year has passed in which my children and I have not missed her." I paused suddenly feeling a bit overwhelmed by it all.

"Katherine was a woman of many layers. She possessed charm, kindness and a good sense of humour… She was a perfect mother; a dedicated wife; a good friend, and a loving daughter…"

"She was a magical person. Always in a good mood, spreading joy around the house and making everything fun, even when it came to taking the trash out." A small wave of laughter erupted in the church.

"She is irreplaceable in all of our hearts…." I said and paused.

"Which is why I feel it is only fair to apologize to her..." I could clearly see most people frowning and looking at me as if I was crazy. I couldn't care less.

"Because I was anything but a perfect husband – at least, in the last two years of our marriage. Katherine deserved someone much better than me. For some reason, she loved me enough to stick with me until the end although I didn't deserve her love. She was always faithful to me, a loving and a supportive wife. For that I want to let her know how much I loved her… And that, no matter what happens I will never forget her. To Katherine…"

The entire church went silent as we kept an official moment of recollection in order to pay our respects to my wife. And I swear, for a moment there, I could see her walking down the aisle again and smiling at me.

* * *

**Later that day…**

**ELENA's POV**

It was about 9pm when I managed to tuck all of the kids into bed and make sure they were all fast asleep. It wasn't hard as they were all exhausted after spending so much time in the church. I quietly made my way down to the kitchen to make myself some tea, sure that even Damon was asleep by now. I really needed something warm and soothing to wash away the hideousness of this day. I couldn't believe it was over. I was immensely happy that I had reached the house in one piece. I was still wearing the black dress from earlier but I was planning to take it off as soon as I reached my bedroom. I could finally have a quiet evening since neither Jenna nor Elijah were here. I was planning to have a typical Saturday evening – have a cup of tea and some biscuits and read a book whilst being tucked up in bed. I sighed as I realized how boring my life was.

I felt my knees buckle the moment I heard Damon's voice coming from the kitchen door.

"Hi there." I turned around and was faced with the most beautiful man I had ever seen in my life. His grey eyes made my heart skip a beat and I could barely breathe. This time he noticed it. If I wasn't careful, soon enough he would realize the entire extent of his control upon me.

"Hi." I happily replied and turned my back to Damon to put some honey in my tea.

"Are you ok?" He gently asked. I was going to say I was fine but I decided against it at the last moment.

"No. Not really." I replied, feeling very vulnerable as I expressed my true feelings.

"How bad is it?" He replied and I could feel his breath on my neck. I froze because of the proximity but ignored the growing feeling of excitement.

"Well… I'm tired, sad and angry." I replied and was surprised to hear my angry tone. I took the pot of tea and went right past Damon to the sink without even looking him in the eye. I turned the tap and started fervently washing the pot.

"I'm sorry about the memorial today." He said, probably sensing that I was pissed off at him. I couldn't stand this; I turned off the tap and dried my hands.

"No, you know what? Forget it." I angrily replied, threw the towel on the kitchen counter and made my way to the living room. The moment I reached the room Damon caught my arm and turned me around so that I could look him in the eye.

"Elena, talk to me please." He begged seeming truly worried.

"What do you want me to say, Damon?" I weakly replied, while the bit of skin that he was touching kept tingling.

"Tell me how you feel…" He replied gently grabbing one side of my face. I hastily removed both his hands and made my way across the room. I turned around and decided to tell him exactly how I felt.

"I feel tired because I spent the entire afternoon focusing on ignoring the people who were clearly gossiping about me. I am sad because I was basically the laughing stock of that church and because I drew the gossiping onto you as well. And, last but not least, I'm bloody angry with you!" I shouted the last sentence to his face. This took him by surprise.

"Why are you angry with me?" He seemed confused.

"You're kidding…" I replied.

"If I were, I wouldn't have asked." He seemed to be serious. That pissed me off even more.

"You came after me." I said waiting for a reaction. His face lit up in realization.

"Yes, I did. What's so wrong about that?" He asked slowly walking towards me.

"You knew they were talking about us! And it didn't cross your mind that by coming after me you'd incite them to gossip even more? You gave them a ground for their gossiping." Why didn't he understand the gravity of the situation?

"I don't care about what they think of me." He said raising his hands in the air as if to prove the obvious.

"See, that's the problem, Damon! You can't act as if you're alone. All of those people are part of your life." I said.

"**Were** part of my life. Most of those were friends or relatives of Kathy's." It was stupid how hurt I was that he still referred to his wife as Kathy. He clearly still loved her. I cursed myself for caring about him.

"You know what they saw when you came out after me?" He stopped about two metres away from me.

"What?" He angrily asked.

"They saw you running after your mistress, to quote the newspapers..." He seemed hurt.

"I came out to help you." I nodded in response.

"That's not how they saw the whole scene." My words made him explode.

"They don't matter to me, Elena! What they think means nothing to me!" He replied.

"How can it mean nothing? You were at your wife's memorial, for God's sake." That seemed to hit a nerve.

"You think I don't know that?" He asked coming even closer to me. He seemed so hurt.

"You think it's easy for me to see you every single day and know that I'm never going to have what I want?" I swallowed hard as I heard him say those words.

"That I'm never going to see that loving look in your eyes?" He asked closing the gap between us.

"…or hear those three words come out of your mouth?" He was so close to my face, a mere few inches away, that I was slightly leaning back above the dining room table.

"**You** matter to me, Elena..." He whispered making me melt in his open arms. He grabbed me holding me so gently as if I was his most precious asset.

"You're the only one who matters to me…" Damon lovingly said and I felt like my heart was going to explode in my chest. He deeply stared into my eyes and I felt goose bumps as I saw his hungry look.

"How can you not **see** it?" He asked caressing my cheeks and his fingers left hot trails around my lips and all over my neck. I was almost hyperventilating from the closeness.

"How can you not **feel** it?" He asked grabbing my waist and gently pulling me so close to his body that I could almost feel his growing desire. Before I could even breathe I felt his lips kissing the spot right below my ear and making me shiver with pleasure. I couldn't control my senses any more. everything in my body was going crazy…

"How can you not understand that I would do anything for you?" He whispered in my ear and lifted my body up, gently setting me down on the table so that my face was at the same level as his. I couldn't resist him… not anymore. He seemed to understand that because he stared into my eyes and asked me:

"Elena, may I kiss you?" His face was a mixture of fear and excitement, of love and pain.

I weakly nodded and before I knew it Damon drew my body so close to his we were basically glued to each other, my legs wrapped around his waist, his hands encircling me. I didn't have time to think but I knew that if I thought about it just for a second I would back away. And the last thing I wanted to do was leave his side. I wanted him, in every way a woman could want a man. And I was finally not afraid to accept it.

"You're so beautiful…" He lovingly said and I could feel my heart opening.

Before I realized what was happening, I pulled his face towards mine and caught his lips in a hungry grasp. His reaction was immediate and I felt myself getting lost in his kiss, enjoying the irresistible flavor of his breath, his soft lips and his arms around me. He kissed me with desire that I hadn't felt in a while in a man.

Damon kissed me with so much love that I knew it for sure. I finally knew what I felt for him. It wasn't simply attraction…No, it went deeper than that. As our kisses became slower and more intimate, I realized what my true feelings for him were. And for the first time, I wasn't scared of feeling this way about him. And why wouldn't I? He was always there for me, even when he wasn't supposed to be. He supported and protected me no matter what.

All of the walls I had fought so much to build around myself just came tumbling down with every kiss and loving touch that Damon gave me. Who was I kidding? I trusted him; admired him… and wanted his love more than everything I had ever wanted in my life.

Truth be told, I was utterly and helplessly falling in love with Damon...

* * *

**_Please review and let me know what you think about Chapter 18 :) Until next time!_**


	19. Chapter 19 - Run

_**Author's note: My dear readers, I cannot begin to apologize for my long absence. My life has changed quite a lot in the past month and my schedule has been more than hectic - it's been absolutely crazy. Long story short, I've managed to get a one-year job so am extremely excited about it. The downside has been my lack of writing and posting but I hope to compensate for my absence by Chapter 19 which is entitled "RUN" after Leona Lewis's lovely song. I really hope you enjoy this. Thank you all so much for the lovely and encouraging reviews that you've posted. You guys are the ones who keep this story going! **_

* * *

**CHAPTER 19 - RUN**

* * *

**ELENA's POV**

The front door suddenly opened with an incredibly loud thud. And then a squeal appeared out of nowhere.

"DAMON!"

Caroline's shout flooded the entire house and made me freeze in Damon's arms. We parted our lips and looked at each other for a second, terrified about what her shout meant.

"Damon!" She shouted again and that's when Damon let go of me and sprinted to the hallway. I rapidly got off of the dining room table, making sure my dress covered every bit of my body that was meant to be covered. I then ran for the hallway as well and saw Caroline. I must say, I had never seen Caroline being such a mess. She seemed really desperate.

"What happened?" Damon's voice was weary and he was staring Caroline straight in the eye.

She couldn't reply but instead instantly started crying – a desperate cry. And she stared back into Damon's eyes with a knowing expression on her face. Damon seemed confused until something probably clicked in his head and his expression drastically changed in a second.

"He found out." Damon whispered.

Caroline nodded and her tears instantly became sobs. To say I was confused was an understatement. I didn't understand anything from their dialogue. I kept looking back and forth from Damon to Caroline hoping that one would start talking. Instead, I was surprised to see Damon tightly hugging Caroline, keeping her in his arms whilst she sobbed.

"How did he find out?" Damon asked in a cracked tone.

"Klaus..." Caroline managed to say. Damon momentarily closed his eyes and carried on.

"It's going to be fine." He replied but his voice sounded empty and fake; the look in his eyes reflected his feelings – and he was clearly hopeless and fearful. I didn't know what to say. If I hadn't known better, I would've thought that something bad had happened to Stefan. But it was clearly not that. Then what was it?

"Damon…" I gently said.

He finally remembered about my presence as he turned his eyes to mine; I could read the guilt he was feeling. His eyebrows furrowed and he gently whispered.

"I'm sorry Elena…" What was he apologizing for?! Just then I could hear a car violently breaking in the driveway and ten seconds later Stefan suddenly appeared in the doorway looking mad. No, he wasn't mad – he was rabid with anger. Damon and Caroline both flinched at the same time as they saw him and I really got scared. What the hell was going on?!

"You." Stefan replied and I realized he was referring to either Caroline and Damon.

Caroline quickly released herself from Damon's arms, took a few steps forward and faced Stefan.

"Please don't hurt him…" She desperately whispered. This seemed to infuriate Stefan even more.

"You're defending him?" Stefan asked with a hollow voice.

"It wasn't his fault." Caroline replied trying to calm him down. "Please Stefan…" she continued, going towards him.

"Please…" She begged and I held my breath as I realized that this had something to do with Damon. Stefan all of a sudden pushed Caroline aside making her fall on the floor and made his way to Damon. In all the commotion I ran to Caroline and helped her get off the floor. It only took a second and I could see Stefan powerfully punching Damon in the face and knocking him on the floor.

**DAMON's POV**

"I cannot believe you did this, Damon. We are THROUGH!" He hated me. My brother truly hated me.

"Stefan, let me explain." I said trying to gather myself off the floor and stand.

"Explain! What the hell is there to explain, you _scumbag_?" Stefan thundered and I could see Elena's jaw wide open whilst she was staring at Stefan in terror.

"We were both drunk... Neither of us knew what we were doing." I replied, trying to make him see reality.

"Oh, no, you're not getting out of this one by claiming to be drunk, you man-whore… I don't even know how you can look at yourself in the mirror." He was right; sometimes I don't know how I could either… He continued in a frustrated and angry manner.

"You cheated on your wife as well! You cheated on **Katherine**, Damon – on the wife you claimed to have loved today at the memorial." He sounded disappointed. And why wouldn't he be? I deserved it.

"I never thought you were such a back-stabbing hypocrite…" Stefan thundered and kicked me in the stomach causing me to gasp for air.

Had I not been guilty, I wouldn't have let my brother beat me like this. But I couldn't be guiltier. So I decided to silently take my punishment. I fully deserved it. I was surprised to suddenly see Elena shove Stefan with all the strength she had, pinning him against the wall and blocking both his arms. I had forgotten how strong she was.

"That's enough Stefan!" She growled at my brother defensively and I could hear the care she felt for me in her menacing tone. She would very soon forget about her feelings for me. I didn't deserve her- not now; not ever…

**ELENA's POV**

"You're such a naïve woman… How can you trust Damon?" Stefan asked in a condescending, disgusted manner. I felt like punching him in the face, that's how annoyed I was at how he was behaving.

"The fact that I trust in Damon is none of your concern. Why _the hell_ are you beating him up?" I asked, demanding an explanation.

"You know what he did, Elena?" Stefan asked me, looking as if he felt sorry for me.

"Stefan, please don't!" Caroline shouted, and I had never seen her crying so much.

"He slept with Caroline, that's what he did." Stefan's words hit me right in the face. It was like a thousand spires went through my heart in that moment. I equally felt like someone had poured freezing water all over my body. Damon… slept with… Caroline? Something was not clicking in my head.

"What?" I whispered releasing Stefan from my grip. I could barely speak.

"Yeah, that was my reaction as well." He replied and for a second there I could see how hurt he was beneath the angry surface.

"Stefan…" Damon begged, having finally gotten up from the floor.

"You stay away from me, you **sick twisted bastard**! You cheated on Katherine. You actually cheated on your wife. I had read many crap about you in gossip magazines but always chose to believe in you. And you didn't just cheat on Kathy, you cheated on her with **Caroline** – **my girlfriend Caroline**! How **the ****hell** do you think that makes me feel?" My heart starting pounding in my chest as I took in every word that Stefan uttered.

"I'm so sorry. I never meant to hurt you." Damon said and I had never seen him this guilty since I'd met him.

"You know what this is called, Damon? Betrayal…" Stefan said and I could see a tear streaming down his face.

"Please, brother…" Damon asked grabbing Stefan's arm. Stefan simply turned around and stared right into Damon's eyes.

"Oh, you remember that now? That we are brothers? You should have remembered that we were brothers when you were screwing my girlfriend." That reduced Damon to silence.

"I wasn't your girlfriend, Stefan. We were on a damn break." Caroline wailed.

"You know what I did when we were on that break, Car'?" Stefan asked seeming as if he was going to rip Caroline's head off.

"I hid in my apartment, got drunk and slept for days in a row. That is the normal way to deal with it. **You** went out and slept with my brother. My brother out of all people..." That was like a slap on Caroline's face.

"Stefan…" She replied.

"Oh, don't worry. I don't blame **you alone**. You were drunk; my big-hearted brother here probably took advantage of you."

I felt the need to leave right then and there. Right before I could escape the room, I was violently stopped in my tracks by Stefan.

"Oh, no you don't Elena. I want you to hear what a conniving bad person Damon Salvatore really is. And that you should stay as far away from him as you can. 'Cause if you ever do get involved with him, this is how you end up" He said pointing at Caroline.

"You either end up cheating on your boyfriend and ruining his life... Or you end up dead – just like Katherine." I actually started weeping upon hearing Stefan's words. I thought my head was going to explode because of what I had just found out. Stefan had grabbed me and shook me as if the way in which he was saying this would reach me. He seemed out of his mind but I couldn't do anything about it. My body went limb.

Out of the blue Damon punched Stefan right in the jaw and knocked him to the floor. Caroline and I went completely silent and stared at Damon as if he had gone mad. Then again, what Stefan had said hadn't been fair to Damon either. But right now, fair was so debatable. Damon seemed equally hurt about Stefan's comment. And who could blame him? His wife had committed suicide and Stefan was blaming him for it. I couldn't even stand properly so I just leaned against the wall looking for support. Caroline seemed to be in the exact same situation as me – even worse from what she seemed.

Damon, well, Damon, was a mess. As he realized what he had done he distanced himself from Stefan who was lying in the middle of the hallway. Damon suddenly turned around and seemed as if he was going to shout in agony. But he stood there, simply breathing, overcome with the shock of everything. Stefan suddenly got up and before either of us could even blink, he ran towards Damon and punched him back. Before Damon could even react, Stefan shoved him so hard that they both went through the glass door towards the beach.

And then everything went silent.

A few seconds later I was seeing red in front of my face.

**DAMON's POV**

_**Flashback**_

"_Katherine, please!" I desperately shouted as my wife ran away from me crying her heart out._

"_You bastard!" She wailed and my heart broke into pieces. _

"_Who is she?!" She screamed her lungs out. _

"_Nobody." I gently answered but instead of calming her down, I infuriated her even more. She came towards me and started punching me in the chest._

"_Who the fuck is she?" She shouted and kept hitting me in the chest as hard as she could. _

"_Katherine, stop!" I said and grabbed her hands. She seemed like she had gone crazy. _

"_Please, hear me out." I pleaded. Her eyes were full of venom though. She was fighting to get out of my grasp but I just couldn't let her go._

"_I can't let go of you until you listen to me." She calmed down and just stared into my eyes for seconds in a row._

"_Ok. I'm listening." I eventually did let go of her._

"_I don't know how to start."Hearing my words, she started laughing and crying in such a crazy manner that I thought she had lost it._

"_This is all so ridiculous... I mean, you'd think you had at least a small idea of what you should be saying to me right now. After all, you cheated on me with another woman." She kept laughing until I said._

"_Katherine, honey, I'm so sorry."_

_And then all of a sudden she stopped wailing and turned cold._

"_So tell me, how was she?" Kathy asked me with a coolness that freaked me out. _

"_Excuse me?" I incredulously asked._

"_How – was –she?" She meant Caroline. Just that she had no idea it had been Caroline. I felt myself filling up with shame._

"_Kathy..."_

"_I hope she was good." She said in a defiant manner._

"_Why would you even...?" I asked feeling like a complete and utter dick._

"_Because apparently... she was worth jeopardizing our relationship!" She said and threw a photo frame directly at me. I ducked and managed to avoid it but it didn't make me feel good; I'd rather it had hit me. _

"_Kathy, I am so sorry. I never meant to hurt you..." I said walking towards her._

"_No, of course you didn't, Damon." She replied and sarcastically grinned." You __**never **__mean to hurt anyone. It just happens, doesn't it?" She was right to blame me for it. She was entitled to it._

"_You don't care about me."She said and opened the doors to our drawer._

"_That's not true." I desperately replied._

"_You never cared about me." Kathy said throwing her clothes out in the open suitcase._

"_How can you say something like that?" I wildly replied._

"_Oh, I don't know, Damon!" She said and kicked the suitcase as hard as she could. "How could you cheat? Because if I recall properly, you promised to love and respect me until death would part us."_

"_Kathy, she means nothing to me. It was just a big fat mistake. I never meant to jeopardize our relationship." A big fat drunken mistake..._

"_And yet you did. Congratulations, Damon, you've finally found a way to drive me away."_

"_What are you talking about? That is **not** what I wanted to do."_

"_I'm taking the kids to my mum's place." She sounded so adamant that I went crazy. I ran and grabbed her tightly before she could leave the room._

"_Katherine, please, no! Kathy look at me, I beg you!" After a few seconds of avoiding my gaze, she finally agreed to it and I stared deeply into her eyes full of tears._

"_Kathy, I regret it so much. I am such an idiotic, ungrateful fool. I didn't want to hurt you. I didn't want this to happen. I love you and I love our kids... and I just want to make this marriage work. I beg of you, can you please just give me another chance?" She stared deeply into my eyes and after thinking it through she replied._

"_If you ever do this to me again, I swear you'll never see me or the kids ever again." I sighed in relief._

"_I could never do this to you again." She released herself from my arms and slowly made her way to our bathroom. Before going in she turned around and faced me with a cold expression._

"_Because of you, everything we have – it's all ruined..." _

**ELENA's POV**

The hospital was surprisingly empty for this time of night. It was complete peace and quiet on the eighth floor. Nurses were elegantly walking from one room to the other, constantly checking on patients that had been recently operated and were now recovering. Once in a while a doctor would walk from the operation suite out on the corridor – but it was never the doctor I was expecting.

"_Damon!" I had shouted running towards him feeling my heart stuck up in my throat._

Everything was annoyingly quiet and still – the kind of stillness that drives you mad in these moments, rather than calm you down. The kind of stillness that lets your mind wander off and remember every awful moment.

_Realizing he was unconscious made my knees tremble. I threw myself next to him in search for a pulse and was relieved when I realized he had a weak one. But my relief ended the moment I saw a gush of blood fastly pouring from his left wrist._

It was all coming back in powerful blows, and I couldn't stop it. Exhaustion from the 5 hours I had spent in the hospital trying to stay awake was overwhelming me; but every time I closed my eyes another image would pop right in front of them.

_I unconsciously grabbed his wrist and squeezed it with my bare hands all the while shouting for Caroline and Stefan to call an ambulance. Stefan remained silent next to me, too shocked to even react – perhaps because of the huge cut he had on the left side of his face. Somewhere in the house I heard Caroline crying for an ambulance._

Every time a memory came back I had to open my eyes widely afraid I would get entangled in it for too long.

Stefan was sitting right next to me. He hadn't uttered a single word for 5 hours. It wasn't because he was mad with me. I doubt that he could even express the struggle that was going on inside of him. Guilt, shame, anger... All of those feelings were dancing on his expression, making it impossible for me to even approach him.

_The moment I realized that I couldn't stop the blood from flowing was when I panicked. When I realized that if the ambulance didn't get here fast enough I could lose him..._

The door opened again and another doctor came out. My breathing quickened until I realized it wasn't Dr. Fell. I wrapped the blanket around my body even tighter to stop myself from shivering so much. But it didn't have any effect.

_Tens of paparazzi were waiting outside the emergency entrance at the hospital. Their camera flashes made me momentarily go blind and forget why I was even there. I was numb for just a second and then anger overwhelmed me and I violently pushed one of the bastards so hard he landed on his back. Before I could do anything more stupid Stefan grabbed me tightly and dragged me after him inside the hospital where the paramedics were quickly taking Damon._

"Such animals..." I involuntarily said. They disgusted me – it disgusted me to the core how they could feed on such human tragedies and sell them in their slimy magazines the following day.

Stefan turned to look at me and for the first time that night acknowledged that I was there. He gently squeezed my frozen hand and replied.

"This is his world, Elena. There's nothing you and I can do about them. So we just have to deal with it."

"_Doctor! Doctor Fell!" I shouted as a 30-year-old woman with black hair and brown eyes passed us to enter the surgery section. She turned around seeming surprised._

"_We're here with Damon Salvatore."_

"_Oh." She promptly replied but in a hesitant manner. That wasn't good._

"_How is he?" Stefan asked; he was right next to me._

"_I have to be honest with you, it's not looking good. He has lost a lot of blood so far and his cut ran very deep, cutting all nerves and tendons in the arm. The concussion he suffered when falling doesn't help us either."_

"_What does that mean?" I asked and I could hear my voice fading._

"_It means that we have a very long operation ahead of us. And that we're going to do everything in our power to save his left hand." She replied. Both of us remained silent. I couldn't believe my ears._

"_I have to go, the operation is starting soon."_

"_Wait!" I cried. "Please...take care of him." I uttered feeling a tear streaming down my face. Her expression changed to understanding as her female feelings unearthed from underneath the professional poker face. _

"_I will do my best, Mrs. Salvatore." She replied and then ran through the grey doors that separated us from the world where the real life and death matters lied. _

She had called me Mrs. Salvatore... I didn't even know how I felt about that. I was too numb to think about such things. The only person on my mind was Damon. I began my silent crying, as I had done dozens of times over the past hours. For the first time, Stefan took me in his arms and held me whilst I weeped.

"What if he doesn't make it, Stefan?" I asked, my voice a mere whisper.

"He's going to make it." He replied in a confident manner. "He's a strong man, Elena."

"But what if he doesn't?" I finally asked after a long pause.

"He can't not make it." Again, a confident voice.

"How can you be so sure?" I needed comfort from someone- anybody.

"Because I couldn't live with myself if he didn't." Stefan replied in a trembling tone.

"I just couldn't." He said.

I felt for him, I really did. Similarly, I knew I just couldn't live without Damon.

Stefan gently shook me and I opened my eyes, confused as to what was happening. Seeing Dr. Fell's face sympathetically staring down at me made me jump off the chair and regain a decent position.

"I'm so sorry." I awkwardly replied. "I can't believe I fell asleep."

"It's perfectly fine. It's actually good that you managed to sleep for a bit. It must have been quite tiring for you." I couldn't reply to her words. I felt too awkward to admit it – after all, she'd been in a surgical room for 8 whole hours.

"How is he, doctor?" was all I could reply.

"He's stable." She replied and smiled reassuringly. I exhaled heavily.

"How did the operation go?" Stefan asked immediately.

"It went well. We had to perform a blood transfusion to keep him going but overall we think it was a success. We eliminated every piece of shattered glass and his left arm should be fully functional."

"Thank God." I replied and involuntarily grabbed Stefan's arm. He seemed relieved as well.

"But we do have to keep him here for a good few days, so the earliest he will be able to go home will be a week." I nodded feeling only relief.

"What about his concussion?" Stefan asked.

"The CT scans didn't show any internal bleeding which is pretty much the best news we could ask for. We have stitched the scar he had on his right cheek because of the broken glass but given how deep the scar was, it will most likely leave a noticeable dent in his skin."

I swallowed with difficulty at the sounds of this. Damon was an actor – even if he would never shoot a film ever again he was still working in the acting industry. I didn't know much about Hollywood but I did know that appearance counted. A lot... Dr. Fell must have sensed my worries as she replied.

"Don't worry. With plastic surgery the scar should be gone in 4-6 months." I nodded and smiled. So everything was ok. I couldn't believe it. I couldn't even rejoice in it. I had been so tense the entire night that I couldn't even relax.

"We will be keeping him under close observation in the next 24 hours. And he should be waking up in 12 hours given how the strength of the anesthesia."

"Could we see him, Dr.?"

"I wouldn't recommend it. Not until he wakes up. You could come back in the evening, he will most likely be waking up then."

"But..." I started but Stefan cut over me.

"Let him rest, Elena. I'm sure the doctors know what's best for him." He replied making me see reason.

"Ok... Is there anything we need to bring him?"

"Ummm, not really. Apart from maybe his shaving kit, a good book to read perhaps... No food or drinks please, as he will be kept under diet for the entire duration of his stay. I think that's about all."

"Thank you so much for everything, doctor. I can't even express how much we appreciate it." I said and squeezed her hand. She nodded and replied.

"Just part of a day's work... Now, please excuse me, I need to fill in some forms about the operation."

With that, Meredith Fell left and I remained still contemplating the clock on the wall. 6:30 am? 6:30 am? He had been in a 8-hour operation? Oh, God. I felt the immensity of it all overwhelming me. Stefan pulled me out of my day dream.

"You should go home and rest." He said, gently squeezing my arm.

"What are you going to do?"

"I'm gonna stay here. I can't leave; not just yet."

"Then I'm staying as well." I firmly replied. To that, Stefan grabbed my arms and looked me straight in the eyes.

"No, Elena, you should go home. You've been up all night and someone needs to take care of the kids as well."

"You are the one who has been up all night. And with respect to the kids, Caroline's with them." The moment I said her name I realized what a big mistake I'd made. I involuntarily bit my lip awaiting Stefan's reaction. Since last night, I felt that he was a ticking bomb. He seemed able to restrain himself though and kindly replied.

"You should go home. And come up with a lie about why Damon won't be coming home for a few days. A _good_ lie..."

"Oh God. I... have no idea what I'm gonna tell them. I can't tell the truth, Damon wouldn't want that." He nodded in response.

"Maybe say he had an urgent meeting to attend in London regarding his movie. It's coming out in a month. It sounds believable."

"Yeah, I could say that. But I still feel bad for leaving you alone here."

"I'll be fine, Elena. Plus, our father is supposed to arrive in about two hours. And...I doubt you'd be up to deal with him right now."

Their father was coming? In the whole 6 months I'd been living in the Salvatore house I'd never encountered Giuseppe Salvatore. The only thing that Damon had ever told me about him was that he moved back to Italy after Stefan left for university and now owned a law firm in Rome. It was hard to picture him but given Stefan's weary expression, I didn't want to meet him. Not just yet. And not in this state...

"Ok. I'll go home." I took a step back and then stopped in my tracks.

"The paparazzi will be waiting outside the hospital, won't they?" Stefan's expression changed and realization hit him. He pursed his lips and started thinking. After 20 seconds he turned to me and said.

"I have a plan."

Twenty minutes later, helped by Dr. Fell, I was sneaking out of the hospital dressed in a white nurse outfit, my hair pulled back in a bum and wearing thick sun glasses. I slipped right past the few paparazzi that had bothered to stick around. I had been lucky, really. I even got a lift until the nearest taxi point and half an hour later I was back home. Again, I was lucky as the kids weren't supposed to be awake for another couple of hours. I slid past Caroline who was dozing on the couch and when I reached my bedroom my head immediately hit the pillow. Next thing I knew I was sinking into sweet nothingness.

**DAMON's POV**

Damn.

I tried to open my eyes but instead felt my head swirling. Just like a stupid baseball...

"Damon?" A distant voice asked.

I tried to focus on the person who was clearly trying to talk to me but I couldn't. I figure I'd just go back to sleep. Maybe they'd leave me alone.

"Damon, are you with us?" Another voice asked. It sounded like a whisper to me, like they were coming from a considerable distance.

I ignored the voices. It was too early in the morning to wake up, I was sure of it. I just felt exhausted. Too exhausted to even open my eyes... The sweet silence felt like a blessing. But after a few seconds I could hear them talking to each other.

"Why isn't he waking up?" It was becoming annoying.

Just shut up already!

"Just give him a bit of time." Another gentle voice replied. I could tell it was a woman.

Yeah. Listen to her; just leave me the hell alone.

"But you said he should have woken up an hour ago." I finally recognized Stefan's voice. Typical behaviour...

What was the matter with these people? Why couldn't they just leave me alone? I was clearly hungover. Must have drunk way too much last night...

"It's perfectly normal for the patient to take a while until they can recover from the anaesthetic." Patient? Anaesthetic? What the hell were they talking about?

"Are you sure you even know what you're doing?" A demanding voice asked. I could recognize that tone anywhere. Father?!

"Because you don't seem old enough to be a specialised doctor..." Yeah, that was my father alright. Nagging as always. Now I knew I was surely dreaming...

"Father, would you stop it already? Dr. Fell knows what she's doing." Stefan replied.

I was getting tired of this dream. I just wanted to wake up now.

I tried to pinch myself to wake up but my hand wouldn't respond to my command.

"Do you even know how many students go into Medical school and turn out to be completely useless doctors who –"

"That's enough dad!" Stefan replied in a very harsh voice. And I could tell that our father would reply – he never liked us snapping at him. He felt completely and utterly disgraced by our behaviour...

I suddenly felt somebody grab my hand.

"Damon?" The woman gently asked.

"Damon, if you can hear us, could you please try to gently open your eyes?" I liked her voice, it wasn't demanding like my father's.

It required a bit of effort but I somehow managed to slightly open them. As light hit my cornea I instantly felt dizzy. And at the same time I started being more aware of my environment. I was feeling cold – which rarely happened to me. The left side of my face burned and itched; that was strange... And the voices were becoming louder.

"His vital signs seem perfectly normal." The woman happily announced.

I slowly opened my eyes and I could see her. The woman who had been talking all along... She had warm brown eyes, brown hair and a kind smile. The image was blurry though and I could swear there were two of her.

"Welcome back, Damon!" She said in a whisper as if she could guess how uncomfortable noise was to me.

"Where am I?" I groggily asked.

"You are in the hospital. You were involved in an accident..." Hearing the word accident instantly made my senses heighten... I gently turned my eyes and saw my brother and father looking at me with worried stares.

"I don't understand..." Dr. Fell's expression changed – or was it just my impression? – and she seemed uncomfortable.

"It happened in your house." She continued and then Stefan gently stepped in.

"We think that you probably tripped and smashed the hallway doors." I was confused, my head hurt and I couldn't think straight. I had broken the glass doors?

"The headache is because of a mild concussion you suffered whilst falling. But we did a CT scan and everything seems perfectly normal." I still cringed upon hearing that... I listened to Dr. Fell though who was slowly and gently talking to me, trying to explain every little detail.

"Don't be surprised when you see the stitches on your right cheek – we had to close up the wound caused by the broken glass." I again cringed and this time gently touched my cheek with my right hand; yeah, it was there like Dr. Fell had said. She quickly carried on.

"It will be removed in a couple of weeks after healing; but don't worry about the scar, Damon – it can easily be corrected by plastic surgery. I can guarantee that." She sincerely added squeezing my hand. I was only looking into her eyes at this point in time; I couldn't focus on more than one person.

"There's something else that you need to know." She carried on in a weary tone. That phrase and tone were never good. I braced myself.

"Upon falling... your left hand got badly cut by the glass and it required surgical intervention. Which is why your hand is now in a cast..." I looked at her as if she was crazy; I even raised my right hand in the air trying to prove her wrong. But when I tried to do the same with my left hand I suddenly realised that it was true. Shock...

"How bad is it?" I heard myself asking.

"Well, it _was_ quite bad; all tendons, veins and arteries in your hand – they were cut apart and disconnected from each other. But we did our best and believe that the operation has been a success. And with daily sessions of massages and treatment your hand's functions should be restored in no time."

"What do you mean _should be_?" My dad suddenly asked. "You said the operation has been a success. You're a doctor; don't you know for sure what's going to happen?"

"Father, for the love of God!" Stefan exclaimed and I couldn't believe my ears – my brother, the golden boy of the family, was actually replying to dad and making comebacks as well. He was acting just like me; and in a weird way I would've been proud of him had I not found out that my hand might turn out to be as alive as a wooden statue.

"No, that's perfectly normal." Dr. Fell replied and I couldn't help but marvel at how patient she was with my father. I really needed her advice on the subject.

"It's understandable given how stressful the situation has been. We cannot guarantee any result though. Only time will tell whether the operation has been successful."

"I understand." I said, feeling a bit overwhelmed by it all.

"Either way, Damon, you were very lucky. If Stefan hadn't found you in the hallway, you would have been much worse. So be grateful for that." Dr. Fell replied and I unwillingly met Stefan's stare. And what I saw in his eyes for that split second told me all I needed to know. That this story was complete and utter bullshit...

"Everything seems to be ok right now but if you need anything, please don't hesitate to press the red button for assistance and I will be checking up on you later on today." Dr Fell said pulling me out of my eye-connection with Stefan.

"Thank you for everything Dr. Fell. I appreciate it."

"More than welcome to help, Damon." With that she left; and for the second time I met Stefan's gaze. It was hard, a combination of feelings that were foreign to me. Love. Hate. Regret. And then as dad came to sit on the bed next to me I started remembering every little detail of last night. Slowly, painfully realizing what had happened.

Dad was taking his time, talking to me, enquiring about how I felt, if I needed anything – he was a good father I finally concluded. If he could bother to come all this way from Rome to see me and genuinely trying not to piss me off then he was a truly good father and cared. And I was happy about this. Because I rarely felt this way about dad.

But I couldn't completely focus on him. Because my eyes and Stefan's met once in a while...never letting me forget about the previous night. The weird thing is that at the end of the trip down memory lane I felt even more ashamed than Stefan was probably feeling right now.

And the guilt hurt much more than all the physical pain did.

**ELENA's POV**

I woke up eight hours later at 4pm with the sound of someone knocking on my door. My head was throbbing with pain – I felt worse than when I had suffered from the horrible Halloween hangover. I barely got out of bed without falling to the ground. The knocking became more insistent and I scurried to the door, praying it wasn't the kids. Instead I was surprised to see Jenna out of all people standing in front of me. I suddenly felt conscious of my pjs, of my-probably wild hair and, overall of my groggy appearance. But instead of commenting, Jenna's face simply turned sympathetic and she suddenly hugged me. I realized she was trying to comfort me. Although I wasn't in the mood for it, I let her do it anyway. She eventually released me from her embrace and kindly said.

"I heard what happened." I nodded in reply and involuntarily grabbed my temples as if to steady myself.

"How do you feel, Elena?" Jenna asked following me to bed where I sat down.

"I'm ok." From the look in her eyes I could tell she didn't buy it.

"How's Damon?" She asked in such a caring and worried manner.

"Oh my God, Damon... I have no idea. I was supposed to wake up earlier and go see him but I guess the alarm didn't go off." I sighed.

"Stefan called us." She replied as if reading my mind. "Elijah and I came back as soon as we could."

"What about your brother?" I asked remembering the reason she had left in the first place.

"He's fine. Well, not fine, but better. He's recovering. But there was no need for me to stay. His wife was there."

"Oh my God. Where are the kids?" I asked and instantly panicked. Jenna quickly calmed me down.

"Don't worry. They're safe. Elijah and Caroline took them all out for a long walk and some dessert." My heart rate went back to normal upon hearing Jenna's words.

"Thank you for coming back. I don't think I could've taken care of them. Not today."

"Not tomorrow either." She said taking my hands in hers. "You need to rest."

"I will. But I need to go make sure that Damon is okay as well. I know I should be staying with the kids right now, but I just... need to go see him." Something in Jenna's eyes suddenly changed and they became slightly watery.

"So it's true." She said staring at me with the kind of love that only a mother has for her child. I was confused to say the least. She must have realized because she carried on in the gentlest tone.

"You have feelings for him." That was all that she said. It took me a few seconds to realize that she was happy for me. I didn't know what to reply and after a while she simply stood up and asked.

"Are you going to the hospital soon?"

"As soon as I can. I don't want the kids seeing me leave." That was partly the reason. The other reason was that I wanted to see him asap. And the last reason was screaming from the back of my head – but I held it in.

"I was thinking of sending something to Damon. Some homemade dessert..." God, she truly was like a mother.

"I don't think the doctors will let him eat any food that isn't made inside the hospital." She sighed and nodded.

"Yes, that sounds like doctors. Anyway, send him my love." I was touched by the fact that Jenna started crying upon this.

"Of course, Jenna." I firmly replied. I was astonished at how much she cared about Damon. In fact, everybody cared about Damon. His kids, Elijah, Jenna, Stefan; all of them cared because he was such a good man. And Jenna was right; I _had_ feelings for Damon. Which is why I knew I had to go to the hospital asap. I jumped out of bed and ran to the shower.

Ten minutes later, dressed-up and ready to go, I found myself entering Damon's bedroom for the first time in six months. I felt my hand trembling as I opened the door and walked inside the only room I had never been in since I moved here. Normally, I wouldn't have done this. It didn't seem right; especially since he wasn't here with me. But I suddenly realized that he would probably need some things in the hospital. I would have let Stefan grab all of these but I doubt he would have agreed to come anywhere near Caroline. I sighed remembering how much the news had affected me as well last night. I blocked my mind; it wasn't the right time to think about it.

Damon's room was huge... It was located on the opposite side of the house, the furthest room away from mine. It had windows facing both the inner garden and the beach and as a result was flooded with warm light. The bed was absolutely huge and together with the wardrobe and desk, gave the room a cosy feeling. I reluctantly entered the bathroom, weary that I would come over anything that Damon wouldn't want me seeing. But it was all spotless – both the bedroom and the bathroom. Everything was lined up on the sink – it was cleaner than my room. That was a peculiar surprise.

I couldn't help but look everywhere; curiosity got the best of me. My gaze involuntarily fell upon a slightly open drawer and my knees started to give in when I saw what-appeared-to-be a pack of condoms in there. My cheeks started burning and I couldn't help but think about Damon, the way he was holding me in his arms last night, the heat that was coming from his god-like body. I caught a glimpse of the shower in the mirror and suddenly I was picturing him inside it, relishing in this fantasy. As reality kicked in, I felt incredibly embarrassed. What the hell was wrong with me? The worse thing was that I didn't even feel guilty for thinking about him in that way.

Feeling extremely ashamed though, I grabbed the toothbrush, toothpaste, comb and shaving set from the sink and almost ran out of the bathroom. I paused as I thought about other things he would need. My cheeks felt like they were burning as I realized what he would need and I decided I couldn't go through his wardrobe. Ok, I could but I would just avoid that specific part of the wardrobe. I shakily opened the drawers and grabbed a pair of jeans, a comfy sweatshirt, trainers and a pair of socks. I specifically avoided to even glance in that part of the wardrobe where I knew his underwear would be. I was too ashamed of this whole thing. It didn't feel right.

I wasn't even his girlfriend...

Feelings simply exploded out of me as I glanced to his desk. He had five pictures – four of them were individual snapshots of all his children. The last one, though, was one that made my insides start laughing at me. I couldn't help but grab the photo frame and stare at the two people that were smiling back at me – a younger version of Damon and Katherine. She was wearing a white wedding dress and was clearly pregnant; Damon was holding her from the back and they were both widely smiling to the camera, seeming genuinely happy although they were only teenagers back then. They both looked gorgeous. I could probably say many things about Katherine but I couldn't say she wasn't beautiful. I looked so plain compared to her. Suddenly I realized how silly I had been. Thinking for just a second that I could actually make Damon happier than she had; that I could make him forget her; that I could be his leading lady. They had been married for 11 years; and although I knew that Damon loved me, I knew that he still loved her. And this whole thing – it just didn't seem right. Not for the kids, not for me and certainly not for him...

**DAMON's POV**

_Sometime around 4 pm._

"How are you feeling?" My father enquired yet again. He was starting to annoy me but I held it in. We would rarely see such a caring behaviour in our father.

"I'm fine. Walking on sunshine." I sarcastically replied and smiled.

"Why were you drinking again, Damon?" He asked and his stare was hard to decipher.

I was becoming sick of this cover-up story. Stefan had clearly told everyone – the doctor, my father and my friends – that I had been drunk when I tripped. To be honest, I couldn't have thought of a better lie to cover up the events that had happened. This way was easier – especially since the paparazzi would get the inside story. And being drunk was a better alternative than fighting with your brother because you slept with his girlfriend.

"I didn't have anything better to do." I replied trying to keep my sarcastic tone to a minimum in front of father. He never appreciated my jokey manner.

"Damon, Damon, Damon..." He said and literally tut-ted. "You can't keep acting like this, son."

"I know, father." These were the complex conversations that I usually had with my father.

"I mean, look at what you've done this time." Internally I was rolling my eyes.

"You could've hurt someone else, not only yourself. You have a responsibility towards your children. They look up to you. What are you gonna tell them?"

"Nothing. They are not supposed to find out about anything this. For all they know, I'm in London right now, working on my latest movie."

"And you actually think Rebekah is going to fall for this?" I smiled as I heard him say only my daughter's name. She was the feistiest of my children, that was for sure.

"I have to take that chance." My father nodded understanding.

"Katherine's memorial." He said.

"What about it?"

"That's why you drank." I couldn't reply anything. I wanted him to believe this story. He took my silence as reassurance.

"How long is it going to take, Damon?" He asked and sighed. My eyebrows furrowed at his question.

"How long is _what_ going to take?"

"Getting over Katherine..."

For the first time in my life I saw my father's expression changing to something I recognized as sadness.

"You know, Damon..." He said and his tone cracked.

"When your mother passed away, it was difficult for me to move on." My imagination must have played tricks on my mind because I thought I saw a tear prickle down my father's cheek.

"Almost impossible really. Because your mother was irreplaceable..." I tried to remember a time when I'd seen my dad react this way. I couldn't.

"But life had to move on. And although I was a wreck for a long while after her death, l managed to get over it." I felt for my father. We all had to get over mum.

"You're failing to do so, Damon."

"Dad..."

"Listen to me. I've been there. It's only gonna get worse if you don't stop clinging to Katherine's memory."

"Father, please listen..." I felt weakened by our conversation but I needed to make him stop.

"I _am_ over Katherine." I slowly said so that he could grasp my words.

"Oh, Damon, you think you are... but not yet, son." He said and smiled.

"No, listen! Just listen...I loved Katherine very much. But I _am_ over her, dad. I truly am. And the reason I'm over her is Elena." I couldn't believe I had just said that. Not for one moment could I have imagined that I would be confessing my love for Elena to my father. And yet, here I was.

"Elena? The children's _nanny_?!" My father couldn't hide his surprise.

"Yes. I... love her, dad." I said and braced myself for what would come next. Instead, I was shocked to hear my father say.

"You love her?" He asked, paused and then asked "_Elena Gilbert_? The girl who broke that paparazzi's nose?" I couldn't help but grin – I remember how my father had called me after seeing the unfortunate event on the news. Yes, my father had actually called from Rome.

"That's her." I weakly replied. My father seemed impressed – again, a rare event.

"You love this woman."

"That's correct." He nodded in acknowledgement.

"Does she love you?" He asked and I winced.

"No, she doesn't." I replied and felt like an idiot.

"You're kidding." My father replied. "You, the famous Hollywood actor Damon Salvatore, are in love with a girl who doesn't love you back." My dad said in a playful manner.

"Go figure." I replied feeling annoyed. He realized I wasn't in the mood for joking.

"Are you sure she's not trying to manipulate you into..."

"Dad, please." He stopped realizing we would get in a fight if he carried on. "She's not like that." I carried on in a gentle tone. "She's so different from all of the women I've met so far."

"What is she like then?" My father asked, seeming genuinely interested. I thought about it twice before answering but decided it was safe to talk to him about this.

"She's brave. Independent... kind...a smart and caring woman. The opposite of so many women I've met so far. But it's not only that. She makes me want to be a better person... The person I was never able to be with Kathy. She makes want to go against my very nature and become a better man. She's changed me." A smile involuntarily appeared on my face and I could see that my dad was again surprised.

"What?" I asked and he shook his head.

"Nothing. I just haven't heard you talking about somebody like this since..." He paused thinking. "Not even since Katherine. Actually, I don't think you ever talked about Katherine in this manner."That statement surprised me to the core.

"Don't get me wrong, Damon. I will never forget the day you came into my office and announced that you and Katherine were going to get married and that she was pregnant. You were vehement about that decision. I know you loved Katherine. Hell, you loved her so much that you gave up on your future to support her and Rebekah. But I don't know if you ever felt something similar to what you're feeling for this Elena girl." Never in my life had I had such a conversation with my father. I had dreaded something like this since I could walk and talk. But here we were, talking about such an important thing and everything was ok. Turns out Giuseppe Salvatore actually had a heart.

"Why are you telling me all of this?" I couldn't help but be a bit suspicious though. After all, I knew my dad better than anyone else – even better than my baby brother. "Why are you being so supportive after years of disapproving my lifestyle, my wife and the way we raised our children?"

"Because, believe it or not, I care about you, Damon. And for the past few years, I've kept a close eye on you. I've seen you waste your life away one day after the other. Giving up your career as a lawyer for an acting career. Cheating on Katherine with beautiful women, basically breaking your marriage apart. Doing one movie after the other, spending so much time away from home that you barely had time to give your children. And then, when Katherine died, my son, you were left with nothing but an empty soul and four children to raise that weren't even that close to you. You were completely lost after she died." He paused and sighed. I felt so many emotions coursing through my veins.

"But now, you seem different. You _are _different. And I can't help but feel happiness at how much you've grown up since the last time we met. You're protecting your children from this whole situation... and you're clearly in love with this Elena girl. And, although she's never going to be the kind of woman I'd want for you, she sounds like a decent girl."

"That doesn't really matter. She doesn't love me so it's all irrelevant."

"She spent the entire night on the hallway with your brother waiting for you to come out of surgery. And then she kept texting Stefan to check up on you. I think she loves you too." My father said in a firm tone.

"Are you serious about this?" I couldn't believe my father's words.

"Well, I haven't met her yet... But by the sound of it, and what Stefan has been telling me about her, it seems like she might feel the same." I didn't know what to say. I was shocked to say the least.

"If she makes you happy, then you shouldn't give up on her. Fight for her, son. You are a _Salvatore_ after all..." Dad said and genuinely put a smile on my face.

**ELENA's POV**

I reached the hospital trembling and in a very bad mood. It was an extremely cold November day – cold for L.A. at least. The weather forecast had announced sunny weather but by the time I left the house it had turned quite windy. And by the look of the clouds it would start raining soon. I used the same entrance as before, dressed up in the nurse outfit like earlier that morning. I was again lucky. Because the vultures were there, prowling around, most likely waiting for me. Just as I was approaching the hospital, though, it started raining. Such a violent rain that it scared all of them to their cars... And again, to my greatest luck, I had an excuse to put the hood of my jacket on and I happened to enter the hospital just as an ambulance arrived, creating the perfect distraction for me to get in without being assaulted.

Stefan greeted me with a weak smile. He seemed exhausted but nonetheless hugged me tightly.

"I'm so glad you're here. Oh, God, you're drenched." I nodded and actually laughed.

"I was lucky enough to get caught by the rain." I doubt he understood but he seemed too tired to enquire about the matter.

"How are you?" I asked.

"I've been better. But at least Damon seems to be fine."

"Is he still awake?" I asked and my heart suddenly became as small as a flea as I awaited his reply.

"He fell asleep half an hour ago, Elena. I'm so sorry." He said clearly noticing my disappointment. "The talk he had with our dad drained him of every ounce of strength." My antennae were suddenly alert.

"Is your dad here?" For some reason, I was scared of Giuseppe Salvatore even before meeting him. I had a distinct feeling that he wouldn't approve of me.

"No, you just missed him." Stefan replied and sympathetically winked at me. "It's probably better if you don't meet him here. He's not a horrible person, don't worry about that, but he does have his quirks."

"Do you think it's ok if I go see Damon?" Stefan's expression softened and he replied.

"Of course it is. Dr. Fell said visitors are ok as long as it's only one person at a time who doesn't disturb him." I nodded and I could feel butterflies in my stomach just at the thought of seeing Damon.

"I'm gonna stay with him."

"Good. We can switch places if you want. I'll be here on the hallway if you need me."

"No." I firmly said surprising Stefan.

"_You_ are going home." I could tell he wanted to resist but I didn't let him.

"I don't want to hear it." My firm tone surprised even me. "Look at you, Stefan. You're exhausted. You've stayed here for almost 24 hours. I can't let you stay any longer."

"I can't leave Elena." He said in a stubborn tone. Well, Stefan was about to find out just how stubborn I was.

"Yes, you can. And you _will_."

"Now, wait a second." He started but I grabbed both his arms and made him pay attention to me.

"Stefan, he's_ safe_!" I said. "I can imagine how you must be feeling about last night but... Damon's safe now. He survived the surgery, he's going to be fine. You can't stay by his side forever, you have to go home and get some rest. Otherwise you'll end up getting ill. And you'll be of no use to him in such a state." Stefan seemed like he was going to resist once again. But then he surprised me.

"Ok." He said and heavily sighed. And then I could see just how tired he truly was. The dark circles underneath his eyes were visible.

"I'll go. But I'm coming back first thing tomorrow morning." I nodded in response.

"Fair enough." He seemed guilty about leaving though.

"Don't feel guilty. I'll stay next to him all night long. I won't leave his side." He seemed unsure.

"I promise." He finally seemed convinced.

"Do you need anything?" I smiled at how kind Stefan could be.

"I'll be perfectly fine."

"Ok. I'll see you in the morning, Elena." With that and a quick hug he left.

And I was left trembling with fear. It was a strange feeling – fear. Because it brought so many negative emotions that it crippled me. I grabbed the bag strap tightly and talked to myself trying to find some ounce of courage.

_Move. Move. Right now. Just move your feet to the room. _

But my feet wouldn't move. I just couldn't find it in me to go see him. I was afraid that he would be much worse than I expected. But then I remembered his warm smile – that smile which made me go over the moon with happiness. His eyes – that made my entire skin tingle with desire. I slowly put one foot in front of the other and approached the room where I knew he was in.

I don't think I ever felt so nervous in my entire life. I pushed the doorknob and slowly made my way in the room and closed the door behind me.

And then I saw him. All alone in that bed... With his left hand in a cast... And his right cheek filled with stitches. It broke my heart to see him like this.

He seemed so peaceful in his sleep though. I couldn't bear to make any noise just in case I would disturb him. After a few seconds of staring at this picture I realized I must have been dreaming. Must have been having a nightmare. I couldn't accept that he was this hurt.

I instantly started crying. Little silent sobs.

I took a few steps towards the bed and put the bag that was filled with his things on the floor. My hands were shaking.

I turned to take a closer look at Damon and I felt like somebody was squeezing my heart so tightly that I could barely breathe.

How could I accept such a reality? He had small cuts all over his face. The part of his left arm that wasn't in a cast was bruised and purple-coloured. And his right hand had a needle stuck in it connecting it to a drip.

I found it hard to breathe. I wanted to kiss every little bit of his skin that was in pain – every cut, every bruise – just to make it better. Just to somehow help him go through this more easily. Because he was helpless.

I knew I shouldn't be doing this – I realized how wrong I was – but I slowly caressed his cheeks. And then his beautiful dark locks of hair. And then every inch of his bruised arms. I knew I could have woken him up and that I shouldn't bother him at all but I couldn't help myself.

My only desire was to take all of his pain away. And I felt useless – I couldn't help him, I was a weak human being. I should have come earlier and sat next to him. I shouldn't have left. I shouldn't have been selfish and gone home. He needed me. I was never going to leave him again. I couldn't... I simply couldn't.

As I gently caressed his hair I realized how much he looked like an angel. Sleeping with his lips partly open, slowly inhaling and exhaling, letting me know that he was safe and alive. It was just me and him. And I was grateful for that. Grateful that I was the person who could spend these moments with him...

As I looked at him I remembered the previous night. Our passionate kisses, the warmth and love that his arms gave me, how close our bodies could be, his arms sheltering me from any harm... And then I cried over and over again as I remember his fight with Stefan. How they both ruthlessly attacked each other like two animals. How they went through the glass door, making me catch my breath and scream Damon's name.

How Caroline came running in and crying. How Stefan let me know that Damon had slept with her years before. The surge of jealousy and hatred I felt towards Caroline would be impossible to describe in words. I wasn't naive. Just by looking at Damon, I could tell that he had broken many female hearts and that he had cheated on his wife with many gorgeous irresistible women. But knowing that Caroline had been one of those women was too much for me to bear thinking about. It was ridiculous – because it hadn't been their fault; they were both drunk at the time – and they had regretted it ever since. I could tell from the way they were both acting last night.

It was stupid and irrational of me to think like this. In the end, Damon hadn't even known I existed when he had slept with Caroline. But a feeling of possessiveness towards him filled my heart and realization hit me hard. I never wanted Damon to be with another woman ever again. I never wanted him to love, kiss or touch another woman as long as he lived. Because I wanted to be the only woman he would love...and kiss...and touch...

Suddenly Damon gently opened his eyes and looked straight into mine. His light blue-grey eyes were fixated on my face revealing every emotion that was going on in his heart.

"You came..." He gently said and grabbed my hand. I felt my knees trembling with emotion.

"Of course I did." I replied and squeezed his hand as much as I could without hurting it.

"Thank you for coming. I don't really deserve it." He whispered back. His eyes were filled with love.

"Don't be silly. I would've come no matter what." My words seemed to make him happier, to soothe him.

"How are you feeling?" I asked remembering about all his wounds. He weakly grinned and replied.

"I've been better." His response made me ache – he was clearly aching as well. Every time he spoke he seemed to be in pain for some reason.

"You should rest. You've had a really bad fall last night." He smiled again and his eyes turned from happy to grim.

"I've made a lot of bad choices that have gotten me here. I deserve this. I deserve all of this..." He slowly said and pointed towards all of his wounds.

"No, you don't!" I firmly replied squeezing his hand again.

"I do, Elena. But I don't regret them." He said and stared so lovingly at me. "Because had I chosen differently, I wouldn't have met you... I'm so sorry I've done so many things to hurt you." I felt a tear prickling down my cheek.

"It's okay... I forgive you." I sincerely said and smiled at him.

"I know you don't love me..." He carried on in a gentle but firm tone. "But _I_ love you. You should know that..." It was breaking my heart. He could barely speak but he clearly wanted me to know this.

"I do." I gently replied and gently touched his stitched cheek.

"You should have met me 13 years ago. You would have liked me..." His words surprised me so much that I found myself replying.

"I like you now. Just the way you are..."

His eyes glowed upon hearing my words and I suddenly felt myself leaning towards him; taking in his sweet scent; admiring every crease on his face; relishing in the proximity of our bodies... And then I found myself slowly brushing my lips against his as gently as I could. My entire body melted as I took in Damon's intoxicating taste and his soft lips. I was afraid of hurting him in any way so I tried to kiss him as softly as humanly possible. After a few seconds of heavenly bliss I released his lips and looked him straight in the eye through all of my tears. His eyes were filled with happiness and love.

"Thank you." He whispered.

"You're welcome." I said and involuntarily smiled at how silly it sounded.

"I feel sleepy. Because of the drugs and painkillers they pumped into me. " He jokingly said.

"Then sleep, darling." I said and gently caressed his cheek whilst admiring him.

"I don't want to. I don't wanna miss a moment of this." He replied weakly squeezing my hand.

"Don't worry. I'll be here when you wake up. I won't leave your side." Damon looked at me for one last time with his big gorgeous blue eyes; and then his eyelids slowly slid over his sockets and he fell asleep.

As I admired this beautiful, kind, innocent man who was sleeping in front of me, everything suddenly became clear to me.

I was not going to leave Damon for anything in the world.

I wasn't gonna run away from love again – not this time.

I wasn't gonna give up on somebody who deserved my love.

And most of all, I wasn't going to ruin my life again by walking out on the best thing that had ever happened to me.

Because Damon Salvatore... well, he had turned my life around.

* * *

**_I really hope you have enjoyed this chapter! I'm eagerly waiting for your comments, opinions and future desires from this story! Until next time :) ._**


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